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ladysoldier 02-04-2007 04:45 PM

Not all C.O's are bad
Now I served almost 8 yrs. in prison (a womens prison) - and although I have had negative experiences..I have also had some positive experiences.

I remember a C.O, Deb Fursteneau .. I had surgery on my thyroid and had contacs..she helped me get a new case for them to store them in when she didn't have to, she fed me on the 'sly'...she just treated me real human. So much little things she did during my 7.5 years were out of just pure love and humanity.
Also C.O. Loretta, she went to bat for me when I went to the hole once. She knew I didn't do what I was accused of and really worked her tail off to get me out. Also c.o. Troy Wolfe helped...and he just listened to me alot and he really cared. He also gave me motivation to do the right thing.
C.O. Jennifer ..she took time to know my family in the visiting room, asked me about how I was doing, she was genuine in asking too. That helps make a difference.
I Gave birth to my son in prison and a variety of c.os were concerned about my well being and many during the years asked to see photos of him .

I did like most of them .. more than not.

so congrats to all the humane and respectful co.s....

HOPE4FUTURE 02-04-2007 04:51 PM

I don't know how advisable it is to be putting officers names on here like this. You could get them in trouble.

ladysoldier 02-04-2007 05:00 PM

Nothing done was illegal. Guess I should have stated that.

It's just that most of the c.o.s still don't do things like that even if they can.

And feeding me in the was a sandwich. I highly doubt her job is in danger as I still talk to her this day!

But just to further state how advisable it is:

Nothing I stated up above was done illegally. These C.O.'s just did plain ol humane gestures ..and that is exactly what I wanted to point out.

Everyone could learn a lesson from them!

Waitin4BlueEyes 02-05-2007 11:19 AM

Thank you for sharing. It's easy to believe they are all bad when we only here one-sided stories form our loved ones and see a little for ourselves at visiting. I too have seen some good ones at visiting though, ones that will joke with you and even tell you your man is on his way out when they know you've been waiting awhile:)
I'm glad you had more good experiences than bad and congrats on maintaining your freedom!!!

Itamedthelion 02-23-2007 01:19 AM

we are all human and need to be treated as such, i used to be a co and i was an awesome co, i was even told to not smile by my bosses. Can you believe that???

for some one who was so sexually harrassed while i worked there (i could be living off of the state pretty fatly)
they sure did treat me nastiliy

zunigan 03-11-2007 06:27 PM

Until last Monday I thought all co's were awful people. I was called by the doctor at the prison to tell me they had found another tumor in my husbands head. He had one in 1999 and last october several in his spine. They were going to do surgery the very next day. I have not seen him for 2 years so this was very upsetting. 2 hours later the phone rang and it was the co with my husband. She let me talk with him for 30 minutes from the hospital. No matter what happens now I will always be great ful for her letting me have that time with him.

utcrush72 03-12-2007 05:25 AM

I am majoring in criminal justice and my first interest is to be a CO, so I don't think all CO's are bad either, and in my experience with the corrections system, I have found that there is good and bad in everything.

Inhousecounsel 03-12-2007 05:39 AM

I know that not all CO's are bad because we have some wonderful CO's (past and present) that are PTO members. In spite if the negative press they get, they still come on here and post in order to help others. Our policies say no CO bashing and I am very glad. I think this is a great thread and I hope folks continue to post their positive experience with CO's. I personally don't have and strong impression one way or the other about the ones I have met. Some are friendlier than others, but none have been inappropriate in my dealings with them.

krpbabygirl 03-12-2007 07:39 AM

Zunigan-My prayers are with you.

The CO's @ Boo's prison aren't all that bad....I'm polite and friendly to them, and they have shown me nothing but respect in return.

angelica916 03-12-2007 08:07 AM

By nature I'm friendly and out going so I usually don't have any problems with the CO's. Even those that are known to be very strict. I treat them with respect and in turn receive the same.

Thank you for your post and paying tribute to those that you remember in a positive light.

june5 03-12-2007 08:17 AM

I'm no CO expert, but I never had a problem with them, as far as visiting. My husband said that he didn't have a problem with them, either. He said as long as the inmates treated them with respect, the CO's wouldn't bother them. I think it's like any other group of people--of course there are going to be some bad CO's on a power trip, but there are plenty who are just trying to do their job, be professional, and go home.

Also, the CO's do have to take alot of crap from inmates. Sometimes we act like they are all sitting there like choirboys while serving their sentence. Maybe our family members aren't doing anything wrong, but there are plenty of inmates who are. My husband said that some of the inmates used to harrass the guards, say things like, 'If we weren't in here, I would kick your a--.' And some made sexual comments to the female CO's that were uncalled for. So we have to look at both sides of the coin.

Frankie68 03-17-2007 01:33 AM

Not all of the CO's are bad and in fact they actually have a sense of humor. The 2 CO's that check people in at Great Meadow just seem to bounce off one another. Theres one who tells you that if your jewelry isnt real you have to remove it before going through the metal detector then he says you can leave it if you like cuz he hasn't given his wife anything in awhile LOL

mrschris 03-18-2007 04:48 AM

yes june, we do have to look at both sides of the can. most people who CO bash have no clue about how unruly, disrespectful, and outright mean inmates can become, and often are. thanks for clearing that up...because there are always two sides to every story.

lady, i am sure that your good contacts with officers came from being the person you are. i've read your posts and i pray for nothing but the best for you, you are a respectful woman and you have worked hard to get where you are.

JamiesGirl06 03-18-2007 06:02 AM

Co's are just people. Some think they are the next best thing to God, and others act they are supposed to, human! I have seen the mix! There is one in particular that is off the wall! Just looking at him gives me the heebie jeebies! lol... very peculiar man! Some think that if they wear a uniform, they are the hottest thing walking, and get a big ego. But for the most part, I haven't had any problems!

meganlea 03-18-2007 08:12 AM

A lot of COs don't try to be jerks. If one inmate pisses them off in the morning, they're going to treat everyone like crap the rest of the day. It's not really just happens. It happens to all of us in our every day lives. When inmates treat COs with more respect then they'll treat them with the same respect back often times.

nancyschlep 03-18-2007 09:39 AM

The CO's at my son's prison have been very helpful. Of course there are instances when they are surly, but generally speaking I have been impressed.

zunigan 03-18-2007 02:18 PM

After dealing with all this medical problems I see that they are not all so bad. Yes the one who let me talke with my husband the night before his brain surgery-she was nice. And I know she did not have to let me talk with him. Now his friend called and he said that there are two co;s there who were asking him today if he had heard how my husband was doing. He told them only that he had the sugery and he was still in hospital. They promised him tomorrow they would try and find out more and let him know so he can call me. They are well aware of how hard it is to get any information out of the system. If nothing else it made me feel good to know that someone there might care. So I guess some are just jerks, heck I have an uncle who was a co for 30 years and he was a big jerk-one of those I would never want to be in with.

flgmtech 03-30-2007 06:03 PM

Good and bad CO's are the same as good and bad every day Joe's
I met both inside. The compassionate CO's and the Indifferent, the hard nosed and kind hearted, the vengeful, and the leniant.
The First Captain we had wsa extremely kind, and most of his lieutenants were the opposite, always out to make themselves out to be bad asses.
But the second Captain we had was worse than any of the Lieutenants and after 9/11, we lost most of the Lieutenants to the Air Marshals.
The new wave of lieutenants were fair but by the book.
One of the Lieutenants got tired of custody and took over as a Facilities CO, this is generally a 9-5 Monday through Friday detail for them over 10-12 Inmates in a shop that ranges from Electrical to Plumbing, anything to care and maintain the Facility. The Lieutenant we got into General Repairs, carpentry and tile, generalized repairs, was a hard liner, real by the book guy, who prior to the facility position was feared and left a big impression on all of those he came into contact with.
Being ex military and he being retired military made me understand him a little bit better tham most.
I respected the position and after time grew to respect the man. He wound up being very fair, and he was a stand up guy. When we had to do some overnight work in the Mess hall and kitchen, tearing up all the old tile and laying down new tile in the entire dining hall, it took five nights working from 8 pm till 3 a.m. He was over me, the emergency electrician and 6 of his own General Carpenters. I had to take up the electrical outlets and wiring for the hot bars and drink stations so I had to be there every night they were.
He would get one head cook to work the night shift and they would cook us burgers or even better peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, as this was a delicacy!
Over all, there were allot of decent CO's and only a few bad apples. But that can be said for any profession in life. I thank those that made my time bearable by treating me with a little dignity and respect.
I pray that those who read this, if your loved ones are in or are going in, that they get the same treatment that I was lucky enough to have had.

God Bless you all.


YapYap 04-26-2007 01:35 AM

I love this thread! It's so nice to read all these positive and moving stories.

For me, I never visited a prison and I'm only writing to a bunch of inmates (9 at the moment) so my experiences are limited. But I have a nice story to share.

Last year I screwed up with one of my pen pals in Virginia. I wanted to surprise her by sending her a book for her birthday. So I ordered it from Amazon and had it sent to her. I figured all prisons allow books to be sent in directly from a vendor, but my pal's prison doesn't allow it. Stupid me didn't look it up to check.

But the nice people in the mailroom at Pocahontas (whoever you are, I'm eternally grateful and you people rock!) didn't send the book back, as you'd expect them to. They allowed my pal to send it home. I was amazed and deeply moved when I read that. So nice of them to allow her to do that!

Also, there's a new lady in the mailroom there now and my pal said she's cool so in case she's reading this: You're making a big difference to all the ladies there and a big Thank You from them all!

missnj 1966 04-27-2007 12:06 PM

n New york the entire system is very nice to me so far. they r at least helpful Nj wont tell u anything but they r here.

misspt 05-20-2007 08:48 AM

I am an ex co and as long as the inmates treated me with respect, i treated them the same way. but there are a few co's who abuse their authority.

guvokikam 05-23-2007 10:11 AM

I hear that! some co's abuse their authority. It's been my experience that some co's are cool and abide by policy, yet at the same time for whatever reason some co's choose to pervert justice. Few news stories in OK reported corruption among inmates and staff. It's embarressing.

YapYap 05-23-2007 03:00 PM

Yeah, I think every negative news report about COs make the many 'good ones' out the (who, optimistic as I am, I presume to be a majority of the total number of COs) look bad and I can imagine that's embarrassing for them. That's why this thread is so awesome: it focuses on the good things many COs do.

guvokikam 05-23-2007 06:25 PM

You're right Yap yap, I was just ticked at this CO for giving my inmate a hard time and wrote him up. My inmate has 4.5 years clear conduct, but another CO wrote a statement stating my inmate was misunderstood. I am grateful for that part because he did not compromise his position.

nadco 05-25-2007 01:17 PM

Not all CO's are bad. I'm a CO and i work 12 hr shifts. i do my job but also converse with the inmates.. it would be a horrible 12 hrs if i went in there acting like robo cop. alot of CO's forget that the inmates are human. i think of it this way, the only difference between i/m's and c/o's is they made a mistake and got caught, we didnt get caught....yet. if you show respect..your goin to get it go in there and treat them like dirt..u'll get that back too... everyone is goin to come across someone they dont like...its human..not juss cuz they are co's or i/m's.. i work on a pod that houses mexican nationals..and it means alot to them when i attempt to speak spanish instead of gettin pissed at the fact they dont speak very good english.

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