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Old 04-29-2019, 05:55 PM
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missingdee missingdee is offline
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Hello everyone....well, I'm going to try to add a new thought daily. There may be some days where I'm good about it and some days where I'm a bit tied up, but I'll try to be at least somewhat consistent.

Let's go with this thought for today: We have to bear in mind the three C's of addiction when it comes to dealing with our loved ones: We didn't cause it, we can't control it and we can't cure it.

What do these three c's mean?

We didn't cause it: No matter what the nature is of the substance abuser in our lives and no matter what role we have taken or not taken in their use of substances (even if we have used substances right along side them,) ultimately we are not the ones who caused them to use. Each of us has a choice. They've made theirs.

We can't control it: We can manipulate, bargain, hide things, keep our money out of their hands and monitor their every move. The reality is, if they have decided to follow a course of substance use/abuse/addiction, nothing we do is going to stop it.

We can't cure it: There is no "magic cure." We can't get our loved ones to take a pill. We can't "love them so much that they recover." It is important for addicts to know that they have love and support. However, for many of us, getting stuck in a pattern of enabling can be difficult to avoid. By recognizing we can't cure the problems that afflict our loved ones, we become free to solve the problems that we do have control over and leave the power to use or not use in the hands of our loved ones.
Missing Dee. Finding Serenity.

"I'm a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work, the more I have of it."
-Thomas Jefferson
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