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Old 09-30-2018, 07:22 PM
rockchalk1 rockchalk1 is offline
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My legal name is still that of my ex-husband's, not my current husband (the one in prison). It was such a pain in the neck the first time to change it, and when we got divorced, I didn't want my kids to think there was something wrong with their last name, so I never changed it. Now, I've considered changing it, but literally the thought of going through and changing it on the 100's of legal documents and banks, etc. just seems like the biggest rigmarole that I just don't think I'm up for it. My husband could care less.

A few months ago however, I made the comment in passing about changing my name and the next time I visited him he wanted to know what was up with that? Half the time though, I still need to refer to people when I call by my maiden name, so if i change my name to his, no one will know who the hell I am. Lol. I've considered referring to myself by that name, if not legally changing it. I have 2 friends who were both haven't legally changed their names, and basically go by the married names, so maybe I'll do that. They both have kids with those husbands though so maybe that also is why.

I've also thought about it a lot more this past year while he's been gone because as creepy as this sounds, when we both die, I've thought about what I would want on my tombstone and I don't think I want his stone to read xxx xxx and mine to read yyy yyy yyy where yyy is my ex husband's last name. I also don't know how weird that would be to have 3 last names on my tombstone since currently my legal name is my first name, my former maiden name, and my first husband's last name. My middle name is my maiden name. I never had a middle name so when I got married I made that my middle name.

Hence to all you young people, when you get married, take the name. Do it while you can, especially if you aren't blending families. I would if this were my first marriage. But do know, it is sort of a hassle, which is why the younger you are, the easier it is!!
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