Emotional Rollercoaster

[lovinhimstill]

I am just completely confused about my feelings lately. i went from being on cloud nine after visiting to being pissed off at every lil thing about him. he called yesterday i spoke to him briefly but to be honest even before i spoke with him i wanted to pick an argument with him. so he gave me the perfect opportunity when he called later than what i was expecting but then the phone cut off so i couldnt get my full 15 minutes of arguing like i wanted which pissed me off even more. Woke up this morning in a better mood but i still couldnt wait for him to call me so i could finish what i had begun. well on my lunch break i checked my voice mail and hear the recording. i was like why would he call so early and thats what he gets for calling thats why he couldnt talk to me, i'll get on him about that when he calls tonight. well the muthasucka didnt call tonight...so it'll probably carry over till tommorrow. i feel bad for tearing him a new hole but i think it'll make me feel better and maybe he can understand some of the frustration i have to deal with. I'm feeling right now like just giving up on this whole thing...i dont have anyone to speak with regarding my feelings and they are getting to the point where i'm about to explode!!! i cant tell him all the time about how i feel because i dont want to stress him out. i tell him my worries and what my friends say and that this is hard, he tells me to write him and he'll write back but thats not good enough...i dont know you guys..i havent cried in a long time and now i feel trapped and alone and every thought of him brings tears to my eyes. I almost burned his picture. I love him with all my heart. i'm just going through one of those weeks i guess. I feel even worse taking it out on people who care about me because i cant take it out on the one who is causing these emotions. (sigh) just needed to vent...thanks again for listening.

[Anthonysgurl]

Being with someone in prison is not easy, but hey, who said love was easy? You hang in there and be strong for him. I can tell that you are having a bad week, but try to make the best of it. If you are angry and looking to pick a fight, maybe it's best that you don't talk to him until you are feeling better. I get those same feelings at times, but I try not to put more stress on my husband because I know that he has a lot to deal with on the inside. We're always here when you need to vent. If it makes you feel better, sleep on your bed of tears!

Tammy

[KTC]

omg girl, i totalllllly hear you. and if its not me picking the fight, its him aying something i flipp out on. im having one of those YEARS, haha i know hoe u feel, my man said oh im trying to call and its not working, im like dude it does work, so it pisses me off to, the whole writing thing also. im glad im not alone in this either, but i so feel ya, like alooott, sounds like me latley. ive been so emotional im gonna explode on someone. i hope it gets better for u and it will, tell him how u feel, because i realized when i dont tell my man how i feel, it bottles up and i gte more upset and more angry just thinking about it till i cant take it anymore. so try to let it out and have him listen to u, men have trouble with that, i try to talk to mine and hes all so blah blah blah, im like helllooo i was talking haha. so yea give it time, it can be hard as damn hell alot of the times but until your settled and set with him being in there and hes ok youll be fine. i had a great day talking to my man today but a bad one last week, it all depends, there soo moody, and they expect us not to be, nooooo way jose, ha. but yea hang it in and lemme know how ur doing ok?, later ktc

[tropical1]

i know exactly what you are saying, I will be content writing a letter and then i get a letter and everything is ok and then bam i am mad i start think about things in the past and I get angry and get a attitude big time, thinking hey what was that you said or what did you mean and are you lying? he cant call me he is in reception so its all letters. it is constant up and down in my feelings and emotions. i really try to watch what i say as far as staring something in letters, but i have this list of questions when he is released next month!!!

carol

[darlenev]

lovin him,
I had trouble crying myself and when I did cry it would be at the most inoppurtune times!! Some times I just have to watch a tear jearker movie and let it all out. Otherwise I'm walking around like I have a 100 pound concrete block on my chest!! Hang in there, I'll be praying for you
GOd bless,
darlenv