So Sad(long)

[sweetthing421]

I Have Been On And Off With My Man For 9 Yrs. Long Story To Get Into But Anyway I Have Always Been Here For Him never cheated The Times We Were On And Together. Well To Sum It Up He Has Baby Mama Drama. Too Much Of A Story To Type. Anyway So In Jan He Finally Tells Me Hwo Much He Loves Me He Promises Me He Woudlnt Hurt Me No More, And He Wants To Get Married. And All This Other Good Stuff. Well I Have Been Here For Him Teh Past 6 Months. Goign To Visits, Calling Caseworkers, Going To Court, Sending Money, Writing, And Fixing Stuff To Find Out About Hsi Case. Well We Have Been Doign So Great Teh Past 6 Months. All Of A Sudden His 3rd Baby Mother Goes To See Him And Yea Now All Of A Sudden Change Of Heart. Saying Hwo He Doenst Want To Hurt Me And So Forth. That Hes Not Leaving Me For Her. Now I Knwo They Aint Together Becuase She Even Todl Me. He Recently Got Transferred From County . Well I Have Been Dying Inside. When I Saw Him On Monday He Tells Me When She Came To See Him, He Just Had Her In Hsi Head From Tiem To Time. On Top Of That When She Went She Didnt Even Have His Son. So Then Again In Tues He Asks Her To Go To Contact Visit The Day Before He Was Gettin Transferred. Which He Promised No One Would Ever Interferre With My Contact Visit Day. And She Wasnt Bringing Her Son On Tues Either. He Said They Were Just Goign To Talk About What He Was Goign To Say In Court Which Is A Bunch Of Bs Cuz They Coudl Have Discussed That On Mondays Non Contact Visit. All These Months I Have Been Goign To Visits And Starting May I Was Teh One At All Hsi Contact Visits. So He Supposedly Says He Didnt Leave Me For Her. He Just Doenst Wnat To Hurt Me. Which I Dotn Understand Why He Would Hurt Me Being That We Have Been Doing Great For 6 Months. Now As For My Situation I Live With My Kid Father. But We Do Not Have Sex And I Even Have My Own Room. 2 Months He Doesnt Trust Me Then 3 Weeks He Says He Understands I Have No Where To Go And He Trusts Me And As Logn As I Have Everything Ready For When He Comes Home Thats All Hes Worrying About. So My Question Is Do You Really Think He Left Me To Be With Her Or Is He Just Stressin Over This Jail Stuff. We Were Suppose To Get Married When He Got To State And Live Together When He Came Home And Have A Baby. What Upsets Me Is I Have Been Here For Him And Never Ever Ever Cheated . I Have Been Sticking By Him Through Everything Even Through Teh Years When He Did Me Dirty. I Relaly Love Him And Want To Try To Work This Out.

[Wobabi]

Hunnie I know you want to hear this more than once ,,,and its ok because I need my girls to hammer things home to me too
But you already know the answer,,this is NOT the dude for you. He lies to you and he sends your mail to other females. He tries to play you for stoopid and he needs to grow up and get out prison and show he can take care of all his kids first before he can come and be a part of your life.
Ok you did all these wonderful things for him,,but why? Do you think that is going to change him from being a cheater?
He has got to want to do that for himself and so far He not trying to change in that area.
You are a smart girl,,I can tell,, just dont stop thinking in the Love game,,,think there too.
You don't need us to tell you he aint the one,,you said it in both your posts. But I will tell you as much as you want to hear it. HE NOT THE ONE SWEETS!
Kay?

[steph0219]

Let go............Both of you have too much drama...Him with his ex's and you living with your ex?

I don't think he is the one for you but that is just my opinion....

Lord knows I have drama in my life and I am trying to get my stuff together....

He is using you and he knows it! Walk away and find a man who truly wants you for you!

Walking away is never easy and I know you are hurting.....

Take Care

PS For you to have a healthy relationship you have got to be on your own and not living with your ex.....My opinion

[sweetthing421]

[chi-fil]

I'm sorry for but I must agree with what the others have said. I don't know why, if you live with your ex, you would be upset when another woman goes to visit him. If you expect him to trust you, then you have to be willing to trust him. I'm not sure what to say, I'm not too good with advice and besides, we usually end up doing what we want to do anyway. I just hope you find some peace and get this worked out, but, I'm thinking that will not happen until you move in new directions. Good luck!

[Enjay]

My ex lives with me and my son (he's not the dad) but he is my room mate and my husband knows him and knows he's there. You can have an ex as a friend and not have anything to do with sex. My ex, whom I call my room mate, and my hubby talk on the phone sometimes when I'm not home. They're cool with the way it is. Now, as far as the BF in prison, if he's played you before, and you feel he's playing you now, find someone you can trust and who will trust you and treat you the way you should be treated. He's not alone and he has alot to work on what with all those babies. Take care of yourself!

[big mama 69]

Sorry girl,but I don't have anything positive to say either. I know you're hurting like hell,and you're really confused,and that's totally understandable. You're the one who's been there for him,you're the one who has made sacrifices for him,and you're the one who's gone the extra mile. I think that alot of times people don't wanna see the obvious,and they don't wanna give up just for the simple fact that they've invested soooooo much time,energy,money etc on their loved one. However,...it is what it is,and in your case it sounds like you're dude is definately playing some f***** up games with you right now,and I KNOW you know it too!!! My advice is this,...follow your gut,and follow that women's intuition,cause those 2 things will usually steer you in the right direction. Take care!

[sweetthing421]

ok well guess wut. i finally thought what the h*** f*** him lol well anyway hsi baby mother calls me yesterday and leaves me a message on my cell and said this

jackie its me tiffany E told me to call u on tues cuz tuesday u had claled hsi counselor crying and u told him to call u with a 201 number. so he todl em to call you and told em to handle it. so idk. like i told him im not getting in it . thats between yall. he told me yall wasnt together any more thats not my problem i told him i dont want my name in involved. i dotn knwo whats goign on with u and my baby father but thats not my business. aiigth bye.


ok ladies so i dont undertsand. he breaks up with me she doenst want him so thats clear and obvious. so honestly if i didnt do anythign what in teh world did he break upw ith me for? lol so he broek up with me on mon. that happened on tues. and he got transferred on wed. and on wed he tried calling me 3 times. so i dotn undertstand whats hsi dilema. she doesnt wnat him so did he break up wit me just cuz teh jail is stressin him out or he iis HOPING his baby motehr will take him back. anyway which way i dotn understand why he calls if he doenst wnat to be with me. retard he is

[Hegotlifenme]

Sweetthing421 (i feel funny typing that name... ) your man is a trip... your whole situation is a trip... i won't bring you down but understand this... MY MAN... has 2 babymothers... me and his daughter mother stayed going through the nonsense BUT from rip he put her in her place... like when it come to visits and stuff he already know i have first dibs... I understand he needs and wants to see his daughter but never will i allow him to make me feel any kind of way behind a babymother when i do EVERYTHING FOR HIM...

The message she left you... hmm... i think its part of the game... she most likely isn't beat for him but she does know she got your man or could have your man and she plays on that.

My son father is locked up AND NEVER WOULD I GO SEE HIM ALONE WITHOUT MY SON... As for my man when his daughter mother did try to go see him alone i happen to be there too so we all had a visit together... like i play alot of games but i'll never be a man fool... ESPECIALLY one in jail...

As for you living with your kid father... i doubt your man will ever really take you seriously while you are living there... shit i wouldn't... no wonder he is confused when his bm come and see him...

i can go on and on but why bother... you are going to do what you want to do... its amazing though like i'm sure you don't get it or see the bigger picture because you dont want to but maybe one day you willl... i really wish you the best of luck with him...

[TAMOMA2000]

I agree....leave it alone and save yourself the drama, trouble and heart ache. This baby mama thing is a trip and best not to get involve.