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FAITHFULL1 · #1 03-15-2008, 06:04 PM

Am i the only one who feels exhausted after a six hour visit? It is great to see my wife for a day, but it is so mentally draining, especially right after leaving. I would not give up my visits for the world, it just really takes it out of me!

othersideofhell · #2 03-15-2008, 06:20 PM

Trust me girl you are NOT alone. Just emotionally SPENT. I am usually ok during the whole visit.. then the clock hits 2 p.m.~ from there on out All I can do is watch the clock and I can feel myself falling into a funk. IT SUX! I just wanted to let you know.. you are NOT alone

FAITHFULL1 · #3 03-15-2008, 06:30 PM

I spent all day with her at a marriage seminar, it was very emotional and a great experience, but all i wanted to do after was go take a nap, (NOT!), had to drive home 150 miles first!

jsnake · #4 03-15-2008, 06:42 PM

it takes me 3 hours to drive there and then 2-3 hour visit then the 3 hours back....it exhausts me also...plus the gas prices are getting too much for me now....

FAITHFULL1 · #5 03-15-2008, 06:51 PM

Ouch, i thought my drive sucked, five hours in the car for five to six hours in visit hall, i hear ya about the gas, i'm lucky my little cavalier gets 35mpg or i would be in serious trouble, too---

timsbaby41 · #6 03-15-2008, 07:06 PM

Sometimes it drains me especially when we have extended visits.Friday through sunday at 8:00 am til 9:00 pm.

howardk5 · #7 03-21-2008, 12:53 AM

For me it isn't the 6 hour visit that is great, seeing how I do not get the chance to see her every weekend, but what is exhausting is the eleven hour drive to where ever it is that I need to be the next morning! That worries the hell out of her she usually calls me before they turn the phones off to make sure I am allright.

Kay's man 4ever · #8 03-21-2008, 01:02 AM

extended contact visits, I also had the incredible desire to take a nap as soon as I got home.

This was not so much from the 1.75 hour trip, but from the emotional highs and lows of a 6 hour contact visit.

Unfortunately, I no longer have that problem in that my visits are behind glass, for only 55 minutes, and have been.. going on year(s).

Thus, I just take a break from a late night at the office, run by and see my Kay, and go back to the office to "make up the time".

Congratulations and best wishes to all those lucky enough to have and enjoy your contact visits.

Kay's man 4ever

askiikizzysgirl · #9 03-23-2008, 09:21 AM

i feel its worth every minute, i'm from south texas and every year i plan a yearly visit b/c i have to drive at leat 27+ hours to see my husband. so if the drive doesn't tire me, so won't the visit

krummy · #10 03-24-2008, 09:54 AM

I think it is the emotional drain and not tired that really gets to me. The first day is really great because I know I will be back the next day but then Sunday the closer it comes time to leave the more emotional the visit becomes and it is very draining.

lilymunster · #11 03-27-2008, 10:47 PM

You are not alone, it is very emotionally draining. I live in LA county and go to visit my husband up in Solano but the traveling which is tiring is not the issue, it is just the emotional attack on you after you leave. Like you say, I would not give up my visits and I love every minute of the visit but everything else that goes along with it is really annoying and draining but when you leave your loved one at the end it is just like a huge rock on your back, you just don't want them there, you can't do anything about it etc.

I can totally relate. Keep up the strength! Take Care!

krummy · #12 03-28-2008, 06:14 PM

Thank you lilymunseter. And you can bet I will not ever give up. I will continue to go every chance I have no matter how emotional. She is well worth it. God bless you

jsnake · #13 03-28-2008, 07:13 PM

when i started visiting years ago. in the beginning, i cryed like a big baby when i left the first 6 months or so, but after awhile i stopped for some reason but i am always sad.....i agree with each and evertuyone one of you that it is very draining emotionally.....b ut each and everyone of you are strong for yuour SO's...I am proud to know you in this forum as well as PTO.....it tells me that even through these troubled times, there still are afew caring people on this planet...thanks for all that you do for your SO's and for being an example for living the Golden Rule...

kindred spirit,

jsnake

krummy · #14 03-28-2008, 08:57 PM

Wow, jsnake you do have a serious compassionate side. I think I can speak for all the others that we all feel the same way about you my friend. I hope it is alright that I call you my friend because I feel even though we are all scattered to the four winds that we have a connection and will always remember each other with a great fondness.

Can I get a big amen on that?

EDSGIRLYGURL · #15 03-29-2008, 09:55 AM

It can be very tough..Some of us have it harder than others.....It takes me anywhere from 2-3 hours on any given day to get there and back home...I hate the drive home every second of it. The thought of leaving him behind and wishing we'd be driving the California desert together side by side...I get home sooooo tired after 2 days of visiting. I hate Monday Mornings

.... But it is all so worth it.....

I feel for EVERYONE out there whether you drive 1/2 an hour or 7 hours.... We love them and they needs us....

krummy · #16 03-29-2008, 09:57 AM

You are so right edsgirlygurl. I know the day will come when I will drive away from there with her by my side and this will all be a scarce memory. And the wait for her will all have been worth every minute.

nick3369 · #17 03-29-2008, 08:04 PM

Definitely an emotional roller coaster. 6 hours feels like 2 at the most when I'm there. I'm so happy and buzzed right after, I feel like I can run 5 miles. 15 minutes after I drive off, I feel like going to sleep. That's not good when you have a 6 hour drive ahead of you! ...It's so worth it just to see her, though

krummy · #18 03-30-2008, 07:34 AM

Hang in there nick, we all have those feelings. Every single time.

BigBurtChino · #19 08-17-2008, 08:13 PM

I just woke up from a 1 1/2 hour nap, found this post from weeks gone past. Today during my 6 hour visit my girl asked me "what are you going to do when you get home"? I confesses to her that the last 3 or 4 Sundays after visiting I have been taking a short nap. Now anybody that knows my personal habits would know that I don't take naps! I'm so routine I'm boring, I get up every morning 4 to 4:30 am and I go to bed at between 10 & 11 pm. I told her today I don't know why but when I leave her after visiting I'm exhausted and have been taking a short nap. She told me you must be getting sick, in 5 plus years we have lived together I have never seen you take a nap. Well I was reading these post on this subject, it has to be the emotions of visiting. I look so forward to my visits on the weekend and have only missed one weekend because I was mad at her. I must say I'm almost always very angry at the whole situation after each visit, I'm mad that I'm going home to an empty house. I just can't wait until I go to that damn prison for the last time and take her home! The best to all. BigBurtChino

nick3369 · #20 08-17-2008, 08:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BigBurtChino

Well I was reading these post on this subject, it has to be the emotions of visiting. I look so forward to my visits on the weekend and have only missed one weekend because I was mad at her. I must say I'm almost always very angry at the whole situation after each visit, I'm mad that I'm going home to an empty house. I just can't wait until I go to that damn prison for the last time and take her home! The best to all. BigBurtChino

You said it all right there, BigBurt! The day when we're sitting beside each other, raising the finger at the prison as it's disappearing in the rearview mirror will be...magical. So magical, in fact, that it seems almost as realistic as, well, magic! But it's coming. The light is visible inside the tunnel, and when she gets out I may need to cut down on the naps a bit...

krummy · #21 08-18-2008, 07:53 AM

Yep, mentally exhausting to the point it is physically exhausting. I think my big thing on that though is getting up at 3am and driving four and half hours before I get there. By the time the visit is over, I am exhausted. I go to my room immediately, shower and crash by 9 pm to get up the next morning and do it all again then drive the 4 and half hours back home. Still I have it better than some folks who have to drive 6 or 7 hours or even have to fly to get to visit. I can not imagine what that is like and hope I never have to find out.

I'mHerQueen · #22 08-18-2008, 10:42 AM

I can not begin to imagine how all of you feel after a visit. Thankfully Veronica and us do not get caught up on us not being able to see each other. She says it is so hard on some of the girls after the visit is over that it makes her almost thankful that we cant. I give each of you kudos for being able to go and then leave them and still keep some sanity after each and every visit. Each of you deserve a gold medal in my opinion. I do not think i would be strong enough i think i would cry all the time (more then i do now) and go into a deep drepression never to be seen again. Ok maybe a bit over exsagerated but you all get my drift. I just wanted to let you all know how truly special each of you are.