Pendulum mood swings and a vent....

[Mrs. Vins]

Hey ladies! I'm starting to think I'm slipping back into old patterns of depression and anxiety. I am miserable. I saw Vin on Saturday and it was awesome, we had a great visit. Yesterday I worked and was ok. I came home and found out that he has a lot of other offenses (driving, dwi, etc.) that I am going to have to clean up before he gets home. I am infuriated and bummed and depressed. So I pretty much slept and did nothing else all day yesterday. This morning I couldn't get myself out of bed. I talked to his mom via email and she said, Yeah, I'm surprised there aren't more! I'm feeling like his whole family is going to wait until I clean up his mess then when he comes home they're going to act like they had a hand in it. Why don't we ALL cough in some money to help get him out of this mess? Yeah right! They're going to wait for me to do it. Not to mention, buy his sneakers, and his magazine subscritpions and EVERYTHING else he wants. I do tell him no on some things if I don't have the money but it's very rare. The only reason why I feel I have to clean up his mess is because I don't want him being taken away as soon as he gets home for these other things. I am starting to resent him sometimes and I don't want to. I am already on medication for depression and anxiety and I have breathing exercises that I have learned from my therapist that get me to relax. So now what?

[1dayatatime]

I feel ya on the fines. J has $1292 worth that must be paid by November. I have told him I must cut down on visiting, phone calls and sending money if he wants those fines paid.

AND guess what he has cut back!!! Set a limit of the amount of money you are gonna spend on him a month and let that be it---tell him he can get it or it can go towards the fines. Good luck!!

ONE

[LeBeau]

Sorry you're feeling, as the English would say, all at sixes and sevens, but this too shall pass.... By all means, tell him that the financial thing is a problem and you might ask his family to help directly , Next time his mom is available to you, tell her "Hey, Gladys, you what the hard part is right now? Trying to meet all the different costs of this situation... maybe you and Harold could help out by sending him some money each month, then I could put more towards his fines" or "I just got the renewal notice for his XYZ subscription and he says his sneakers are worn out.... Can you catch the cost of either the shoes or the subscription?"..Either she'll say "Oh, of course! I'm sorry we did not think about this sooner, you poor baby, doing this all alone"(okay, probably not, but hey, it could happen) or she'll backpedal fast and then at least you'll be able to say "Well, I tried to give them a chance to be a part of the solution"
Either way, it might make you feel just a little less frustrated.
All my best

[Mrs. Vins]

Gladys and Harold.....LMAO. Thatput a smile on my face just thinking about it. He asked her to give me half for his magazine subscription and she said sure no problem. Then she has conveniently forgotten. She is the type that if she's asked again she will flip out, so I'm not going to hold my breath for that.

I am all at sixes and sevens....LeBeau you make me laugh.

[LeBeau]

If I made you laugh, then my work here is done, and done well! Glad I could lighten things, even if just for a moment.