How do I tell him his son's mom is filing for termination of his rights?

[kendra425]

I have a strange relationship with my man's baby-momma, his son's mom and I are actually close friends. She hadn't allowed him any contact with his son so I found her (on myspace) and made friends with her. My man has only one child and has a life sentence. His son is the most important thing in his life, but he hasn't seen him since he was 2 months old. I desperately wanted to meet his son and try to convince his ex to let him have visits or at least phone calls with the boy. I actually convinced her to allow the phone calls, but now she has changed her mind. Losing the calls was bad enough, now she has recently told me she wants to terminate rights, change the boy's name, and hopes he will forget Robert. She said that I can still see the boy because I have done nothing wrong, I try to help her and I love the child. She holds nothing against me, but she won't even let me buy the boy a present from the money his dad sent unless I say it was from 'santa'. She believes that if/when his four year old finds out that his dad is in prison for murder that it will hurt the child so she is trying to 'protect' him from that by not allowing him anymore contact and hoping he will forget the contact he has had. Nothing I can say to her will change her opinions. Now I have a heavy heart because I will have to be the one to break the news to my lover that his ex will be terminating his rights and changing his son's last name. I am so depressed and lost as to what to say or how to say it. I feel some hurt and anger at my friend but I can't say anything or risk losing my contact with Robert's son. At least when I see the child I can still tell his dad how he is doing and I can take photos.