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MissouriMom · #1 03-31-2009, 01:05 PM

My son has a 3yr old son with an ex gf. My son is currently at SECC and is due for parole in June. His ex gf is trying to get him to sign over his parental rights. My grandson is all he has to look forward to. I have told him under no circumstances does he sign anything. Can he get legal help while at SECC? I am also afraid that his ex gf will no longer let me see my grandson. Is there anything I can do?? She has threatened to move out of state unless my son signs. I have my grandson no less than two days a week and he is very much a part of our lives. I welcome any advice.

judgemenot · #2 03-31-2009, 03:56 PM

Tell him not to sign-he can get a lawyer while in prison to help with that-or he can wait until he gets out and find her then and fight it. Legally in most states grandparents have no rights anymore. If she flat out doesn't want you to see the child there is a 50-50 chance the judge would rule in her favor and another thing has paternity been established? PM me is you wish I jsut don't follow these replies very well.

only1love · #3 03-31-2009, 06:53 PM

As far as I know, no one can force him to surrender parental rights. I would contact an attorney. Many of them offer free consultation.

MissouriMom · #4 03-31-2009, 08:26 PM

I will let him know that.... i'm just scared. He is on the birth certificate and she has sued him for child support ( i'm sure she needed to do this to get state aid). I was told that this establishes paternity.

MissouriMom · #5 03-31-2009, 08:28 PM

I have a list of local attorneys to call tomorrow. Are there legal aids in SECC that he can talk to?

boflipflops36 · #6 03-31-2009, 08:50 PM

If you can afford a Lawyer for you go file to get visatition with your grandchild. Document everything she does, says, if you help suppoert the child keep records. There are a lot of forms you can get off line and send to him to fill out for him to ask for visatation rights. This is 2010 the judges no its important that both parents be involved with the child. I would start something now to hold her in the state your in so she can;t move the filing. If he signed the birth certificate then he is legeally his.
I was in the same situation with my grandson 7 years ago, and when she filed for child support, we had already took the child and had DNA done (we had it set up to take grandson and child) Don't need Mom! We no she is Mother! right!
So go talk to a lawyer your self and also find out what the state you live in laws are for child visatation of non-custodial parent. Then write thos down, send to your son, have him go over them and have him ready to present that to judge when she takes him to court for child support. And he can tell the Judge--have papers in his hand and Said Judge I would like my Parental right addressed, I have none!!
If they established child support that day in court then he has a right to STEP UP AND SAY YOUR HONOR MAY I ADDRESS MY VISATATION RIGHTS!! wE GOT EVERY THING WE ASK FOR! WITH OUT A lAWYER.yES HE HAD TO PAY 12000 BACK CHILD SUPPORT BUT YOUR SON CAN GET HIS RIGHTS. DO NOT LET HIM SIGN OVER HIS RIGHTS, HE DOES NOT HAVE TO DO THAT. AND MY dAUGHTER GOT GRANDPARENTS RIGHT IN THE STATE OF Alabama 3 years ago!! Go for it. I have been there I repesented my Grandson my self. I did my home work. Go google the state custody laws for the state you live in and get some advice from a paralegal. I did,

WaitingForHer1 · #7 04-02-2009, 05:19 AM

Missouri MOM- Sounds like the childs mom wants your son out of her life one way or the other as in either she will move or wants his rights terminated.

Is there a court order in regards to your sons visitation rights? If so what does it say? The reason why I am asking is in the name of Parental Abduction I dont think a parent can take another parents child away without letting the non-custodial parent know the childs new address. All he can do is wait until he is released to either file a parental abduction charge (depending on what if any custody orders are) or he can file a paper to get his visitation rights. Which might be hard to exercise if your son is paroled to one are and his child is in a different area. Even though he can get permission from his parole officer to take care of legal matters or see his son.

As far as grand parent rights are concerned does your state have such a thing? In that case you need to stay on good terms with the childs mother and go through her.

I know it sucks loosing a kid to prison and the grandchild as well.

seansbabyluv · #8 04-03-2009, 06:01 AM

Unless there was a custody order established by a court either one of your grandson's parents can legally take him anywhere. She may think that because she has court-ordered child support that she also has custody but that is not true. Welfare only addresses the issue of support not custody. He has every right to see his son. He needs to file a parenting plan and custody petition with the court before he's released. By the time he gets out, it should be close to the hearing for custody and visitation. Good luck.

tinkerbell716 · #9 04-06-2009, 08:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MissouriMom

My son has a 3yr old son with an ex gf. My son is currently at SECC and is due for parole in June. His ex gf is trying to get him to sign over his parental rights. My grandson is all he has to look forward to. I have told him under no circumstances does he sign anything. Can he get legal help while at SECC? I am also afraid that his ex gf will no longer let me see my grandson. Is there anything I can do?? She has threatened to move out of state unless my son signs. I have my grandson no less than two days a week and he is very much a part of our lives. I welcome any advice.

In my state a parent cannot automatically have their rights revoked because they went to prison. It is possible for Department of Children and Families to initiate a petition to terminate parental rights if they think it's in the child's best interest, as well a private party can also move to have parental rights terminated.

If you as the grandparent have been taking the child to visit their parent in prison and the child has an established relationship and also had visitation established prior to incarceration then the incarcerated parent could file a motion with in the paternity case to "prevent relocation". It would be best to have an attorney, but if you cannot afford one, then look into doing it pro se - - visit the self-help website, law library etc for your courthouse.

If the child is fairing well, and there is an established routine, the courts don't like to change the child's environment. Again I emphasize if the child is doing well with the arrangement. It would be a tough road and there are alot of variables the courts will consider - - is the incarcerated parent a repeat offender, is the incarcerated parent in for a lengthy sentence, how certain is the upcoming parole of being granted, the relationship prior to being incarcerated, etc. The other variables as they relate to the now custodial parent is - - do they provide a stable environment, etc. Since you see the child so frequently now it could also go in your favor. You may also consider helping your son contribute to the financial welfare of the child by paying child support if it was ordered even if it's only $100.00 per month.

I wish you the best, and suggest you work on the angle of blocking relocation first; however keep in mind it will probably infuriate the girlfriend to be drug into a court battle and you as the grandparent will have a hard time seeing the child without her blessing. If the girlfriend is going to do it no matter what then I think that makes your decision easier.

momfromtn · #10 04-12-2009, 06:59 AM

Can anyone give me some advise on how to handle this situation. My son is scheduled to be sent to a halfway house in june and i have custody of two of his children and the other grandmother had custody of one child. She signed custody of that child back to the mother that was and probably still is a drug user and is in relationships with abusive men. Now they will not let the child come to my house and it was a order of the courts that we have every other weekend visits with the girls but now that the mother has so called custody of the 5 yr old she wants custody back of the 3 yr old that i have because they know that my son is getting out soon and do not want him to see his girls what can i do. i have been taking them to see him 2 x a month when possible.

MissouriMom · #11 05-18-2009, 04:39 PM

Sorry that it has been a while since I logged in. Here is latest. I have been denied visitation with my Grandson since the week of Easter. The ex-gf has written my son a letter stating that she intends to marry and that her new bf wants to adopt my Grandson. She told my son that if he doesn't sign over my Grandson that I will never se him again. I initially let on that I did not know this. I asked two and three times a week to see my Grandson and his Mom always had an excuse... he is sick, out of town, busy, already have plans... I then asked her mom what was going on and to see what she could do to see if she could talk some sense into her daughter. The mom emailed me and said that her daughter did not want my Grandson to be at my house until "things were settled" with my son. I told her how unfair that this was and her daughter was just using my Grandson as a tool to get my son to sign over his rights. What hurts is that I helped her find her Grandaughter last year. Her son had passed away in 2002 and the Mom took off with the Grandaughter to Wash State. I did some investigative work and she was flying to see her a week later. I contacted an attorney today and was told that since I had an established relationship with my Grandson that I should be granted visitation fairly easily and that my son can also get visitation. What is hurting me now is the $4000 retainer that the attorney needs. God willing, I will get it somehow..... Thanks to all for your replies and encouragement.

ghostsbabygirl · #12 05-20-2009, 08:25 AM

MissourMom-call some other attys and get more price amounts also call legal aid if money is a factor. My grandparents got visitation of me in the early 80's even when their son (my father) was the abuser. He wasn't supposed to be around when I visited. I am just saying it very common for grandparents to visitation even more nowadays so don't give up! Good Luck!

Shorty'swifey · #13 06-02-2009, 11:06 AM

How can my husband get visitation rights for his 8 year old daughter. He was married to the mother and then divorced. She currently lives with her boyfriend who is not allowing my husband contact with his daughter. His ex-wife is an alchoholic and my mother-n-law believes she signed over her parental rights to her adoptive/foster mother (since her parents abandoned his ex as a child) so she can collect welfare for my step-daughter. How do I investigate, or does anyone have a reccomendation of a private investigator in the bay area who could help me gather the information needed to be able to get dual rights. My husband never gave up his custodial rights and his ex uses his daughter as a pawn between them. One day she saids, "yes she can visit" and then she changes her mine. Like most recently, she just changed her mine about letting my step-daughter come on Father's Day. Since he has been incarcerated his ex has not allowed my step-daughter to visit on Father's Day. What can we do? They were legally married, what rights does he have? And if she did give up custodial rights to my step-daughter can we get custody?
Anyone advise in California? Thank you.

thatwiz · #14 06-02-2009, 12:52 PM

There's a little boy-he's about 6 now-who is a foster child in my apartment complex. He lives with a family who takes very good care of him. They would love to adopt him. His Father is in prison and will be until the boy is an adult. He wouldn't give up his rights. The child will stay in foster care until he ages out and maybe by the time he turns 18, his Pops may get out.