My sons sentencing was today

[ajpsmom]

Well it is finally over my husband and I said we feel like we are in some sort of dream, kind of in a fog. He received 3 1/2 years we had hoped for less but it also could have been more so I am thankful for that. Now the waiting game on were he goes how to find him these next few weeks. I'm again caught in that mixed feeling state of so sad but also mad again at the fact that he has put us all though this, a part of me will be missing the whole time he is away. My husband says its time to start living again and I know its true but I am also dealing with my brothers illness and so worried my son who really looked up to my brother will not have any time with him again. I was just sent a text that one of the people I worked with passed away today also, they had been battling cancer...It sure has been a very very difficult month and 1/2 for me...Thank you to everyone for listening. Looks like I will be a fixture on here for awhile to come....How do you do one of those time line things?

[angel mathews]

Geez I never rains but in sure does pour Try and take it one day at a time and if that does'nt work one moment at a time or even one second at a time every thing happens for a reason and as you said your son could have gotten much more time the power of prayer is a powerful tool and i stand behind 100%

now how to install your ticker


Go to www.tickerfactory.com
About 2/3 of way done click on Event

First choose a ticker ruler (note if you don’t see any on the first page click on the underlined numbers at the bottom of the page) (don't click next).

After you choose the ruler (by clicking on the dot next to it) - then click on Next.

Then you choose your ticker slider the same way you chose your ruler - then you click on Next.

Enter the date your LO is getting out, right in what the event is and then put the current date and time then you click on Next.

Under the bb code is a box with URL in it. You will need to copy all of the address beginning at http all the way to the end at .png. You actually highlight it all and right click on it and click on copy. (Note don’t choose the img at the beginning or the end).

Go to Prison Talk User CP – Control Panel and click on Edit Signature.

Click on “Insert Image” (this is above message box to the right – it looks like a picture of a mountain with a sun in the corner)

A Box with the http should come up and you will right click in the box and click on paste then click on OK. Your ticker should come up in the message box. You then click on “Preview Signature” at the bottom and if it looks ok then click on Save Signature



If this does'nt work copy and paste I have done the copy and paste often and it still will work ((((hugs)))) Angel

[JShipsMom]

The power of pray works I know 3 1/2 yrs seems like a long time, and it is, but just remember that God will be working hard during that time and when your son comes home hopefully a changed better man. I am so sorry you've had to indure such a trying month, I probably would have a nervous break ( my mom was always having one of those )but you stayed strong for your son and family and that says alot about you as a person. If you ever need to talk, cry or vent I am always here.........
God Bless you and your Family and may he give you some peace now
Pam

[addictsmom]

Ajpsmom, at least now you know what you are looking at. That has to be something to be thankful for. That is a loooong time, I agree, but it could have been very worse (is that even a word phrase ). You son will probably be transferred to his reception facility in the next few weeks and that is a long holding pattern. No visits, calls, etc... But, with good time and all, maybe he will only have to serve half. Who knows, but prepare for the worst and hope for the best. We must be strong for our kids cause they depend on us for that. And, your husband is right. It is time to start taking care of you (and him) and your life. The old saying is that you can do the time but dont let the time do you. You have my prayers and condolences.

Diane

[judean07]

Soon things will get easier... once my son was mainlined things got better. There was no more guessing and worrying about what would be. The fog you are feeling, very normal, I would shake my head trying to clear it, doesn't work. Be strong and we are here. Hugs to you and your family

[shwnsmom2]

Originally Posted by ajpsmom

Well it is finally over my husband and I said we feel like we are in some sort of dream, kind of in a fog. He received 3 1/2 years we had hoped for less but it also could have been more so I am thankful for that. Now the waiting game on were he goes how to find him these next few weeks. I'm again caught in that mixed feeling state of so sad but also mad again at the fact that he has put us all though this, a part of me will be missing the whole time he is away. My husband says its time to start living again and I know its true but I am also dealing with my brothers illness and so worried my son who really looked up to my brother will not have any time with him again. I was just sent a text that one of the people I worked with passed away today also, they had been battling cancer...It sure has been a very very difficult month and 1/2 for me...Thank you to everyone for listening. Looks like I will be a fixture on here for awhile to come....How do you do one of those time line things?

I am sorry, but, I do not know anything about "timeline", I don't even know what you are talking about!
but, I do know that your husband is correct, you have to start living again, I know too well, how hard this is even to think about, let alone to do, but, one second at a time, soon it will be one minute, one hour, one day at a time, but, I do promise it does get better. However this is most deffinetly a roller coaster ride of emotions!
One second of time in prison is too much, but, as you said your son could have received more time! back before my son was sentenced, a friend was telling me that her son receive 7 years, I hoped and prayed that my son would not receive that much time, well, his attorney screwed him and my son received 60 years!
I am so sorry for all of the pain you have gone through and are going through.
but, know that you are not alone, you have many sisters here
God bless you, your son and family
Lynn

[ajpsmom]

Thank you I did figure it out. I think somehow seeing time tick down will help.....

Originally Posted by angel mathews

Geez I never rains but in sure does pour Try and take it one day at a time and if that does'nt work one moment at a time or even one second at a time every thing happens for a reason and as you said your son could have gotten much more time the power of prayer is a powerful tool and i stand behind 100%

now how to install your ticker


Go to www.tickerfactory.com
About 2/3 of way done click on Event

First choose a ticker ruler (note if you don’t see any on the first page click on the underlined numbers at the bottom of the page) (don't click next).

After you choose the ruler (by clicking on the dot next to it) - then click on Next.

Then you choose your ticker slider the same way you chose your ruler - then you click on Next.

Enter the date your LO is getting out, right in what the event is and then put the current date and time then you click on Next.

Under the bb code is a box with URL in it. You will need to copy all of the address beginning at http all the way to the end at .png. You actually highlight it all and right click on it and click on copy. (Note don’t choose the img at the beginning or the end).

Go to Prison Talk User CP – Control Panel and click on Edit Signature.

Click on “Insert Image” (this is above message box to the right – it looks like a picture of a mountain with a sun in the corner)

A Box with the http should come up and you will right click in the box and click on paste then click on OK. Your ticker should come up in the message box. You then click on “Preview Signature” at the bottom and if it looks ok then click on Save Signature



If this does'nt work copy and paste I have done the copy and paste often and it still will work ((((hugs)))) Angel

[boop's mom]

This is by far the hardest part of the journey, a big waiting game. Nowhere to look but ahead now. In time you will start to live your life again. Your son will never be far from your thoughts, you'll have up and down days but it won't be as all consuming as it feels right now. Prayers for you and your family.

[a_blessing]

I know what you are going through...My son is serving 3 1/2 years left of his sentence.....I have been going through this since he was 17...he was out for two years at the age of 21 and now he is back in again...The one thing that I can tell you is he needs you as much as you need him..but you have to continue to live. When my son's grandfather passed away he was incarcerated, and now my father has terminal cancer with only 3-6 months to live and he will once again be incarcerated. The one thing that I have learned through all of this is I have to keep my faith, keep strong and go on with my life...No, it is not easy because the heart ache is so great, the loneliness hits me sometimes like a brick has hit me but the one thing that I can keep doing is being his mom and loving my son. I tell myself that he is at times my greatest heart ache and my greatest joy ... but through it all he is my heart and I love him!!!

Originally Posted by ajpsmom

Well it is finally over my husband and I said we feel like we are in some sort of dream, kind of in a fog. He received 3 1/2 years we had hoped for less but it also could have been more so I am thankful for that. Now the waiting game on were he goes how to find him these next few weeks. I'm again caught in that mixed feeling state of so sad but also mad again at the fact that he has put us all though this, a part of me will be missing the whole time he is away. My husband says its time to start living again and I know its true but I am also dealing with my brothers illness and so worried my son who really looked up to my brother will not have any time with him again. I was just sent a text that one of the people I worked with passed away today also, they had been battling cancer...It sure has been a very very difficult month and 1/2 for me...Thank you to everyone for listening. Looks like I will be a fixture on here for awhile to come....How do you do one of those time line things?

[ajpsmom]

Originally Posted by boop's mom

This is by far the hardest part of the journey, a big waiting game. Nowhere to look but ahead now. In time you will start to live your life again. Your son will never be far from your thoughts, you'll have up and down days but it won't be as all consuming as it feels right now. Prayers for you and your family.

thank you and I see you only have 2 more days how wonderful!!!!

[ajpsmom]

Originally Posted by a_blessing

I know what you are going through...My son is serving 3 1/2 years left of his sentence.....I have been going through this since he was 17...he was out for two years at the age of 21 and now he is back in again...The one thing that I can tell you is he needs you as much as you need him..but you have to continue to live. When my son's grandfather passed away he was incarcerated, and now my father has terminal cancer with only 3-6 months to live and he will once again be incarcerated. The one thing that I have learned through all of this is I have to keep my faith, keep strong and go on with my life...No, it is not easy because the heart ache is so great, the loneliness hits me sometimes like a brick has hit me but the one thing that I can keep doing is being his mom and loving my son. I tell myself that he is at times my greatest heart ache and my greatest joy ... but through it all he is my heart and I love him!!!

Your kind words mean so much, i know after he is finally at what ever place they send him i will settle in a bit better, even though my heart aches its not as bad as not knowing what amount of time he is getting. I told me husband I could handle the sadness it was the not knowing that really eats you up because you make up all kinds of things in your mind, the time now I have no control over and AZ has an 85% thing so he is in there at least 3 years....Just writing that hurts but at least on here I know i am not alone, sorry about all your heart aches also I lost both of my parents a while ago but my mom was also to cancer and that is a tough road. If you just need to vent ever let me know.....Thanks again

[heavy]

Ajpsmom,Iknow 3 1/2 years is a long time.But we are here for you.Ihave a son in prison.And he has bend gond a year and 6months,He date to get out is 2011.It does get better.But I have my days thinking about my son.
I will be praying for you and you son.If you every need to talk pm me.
GodBless

[alexsci]

Ajpsmom, my son also has to serve 85% and I am still doing the roller coaster emotional thing but at least I know the date he will get out. We don't have to worry about "good time" and seeing the parole board. Small comfort but wondering what parole will say is another emotional ride. My son will have to serve an additional three years of supervised parole after he is released but one step at a time.
My daughter and I went on a mother-daughter trip right after he was sentenced and that was really hard for me to do. My younger sister had a stroke right before I left and I was going to cancel because she is all alone...my brother-in-law died recently. My husband insisted that I go and said he would take care of everything with my sister. I'm really glad I went...I felt almost normal again. Now that I'm home it seems that everything has hit the fan. My sister had a second stroke and is totally paralyzed on her left side. I went thru her house and bills and it seems she has been hiding a lot of problems from me. She knows that I would always be there for her but I guess she probably thought of me as the "bossy big sister". Everything is in such disarray that I think she must have been having mini strokes before this. I came home from my sister's house and jokingly told my hubby "Shoot me now 'cause I don't have a clue how to help her except to take a bulldozer to her house". *Sigh* We'll get thru this, too. I didn't visit her tonight because I needed to stay home and login here and I refuse to feel guilty about that. Both she and my son sound the same on the phone....trapped and miserable but we'll all need some time to get used to our new situations. Hang in there.

[heartbrokenmom]

My son got eight years. It has been a long road for us and this past year has just been a nightmare. It just seems to be getting worse and worse for us. It is a long story about what a nightmare it has been. I am still making it and I know if I can, that you can. I cry a lot, pray and come here. Thank God for this site that we can come and know there are others in this world that are feeling what we are feeling. So many do not understand the heartache. Even my other children and even my husband do not understand my heartache. Sometimes I feel as if I'm all alone in feeling this way, but I come here and read some other posts and know there are other moms and dads feeling just like me. This site is filled with so much info and will help you get through it.

[Tracy147]

This may help you deal with the 31/2 yrs better. My son was sentenced to 5-15 yrs. He can get out in 5yrs. I felt everything you are feeling right now, 5yrs my son will be gone, how can I do this. One day I was on here and reading the thread about "Parents with children doing 10yrs +. After reading the stories and feeling their pain, 5yrs didnt seem like nothing compared to what those other poor parents are going thru. Another thread was about "having more than one child in prison. I feel very thankful that I will get my son home soon, these others have a life time to wait. Three yrs will go by faster than you think, I remember the day my son (17) at the time was taken, It was like yesterday, well its been 5yrs and we made it thru. Just waiting to see when he will be released. Its a nitemare right now, give it time and it will be a memory that you can put away forever. Take care, Big hugs... Tracy

[ajpsmom]

I know, I read those too and beleive me I am thankful it is not longer I guess it just takes some getting used to. I'm still getting used to the fact that all this happened. Only 6 months ago things still looked good for him, drugs will do that they take control very quickly. I also realize he is not
an angel and what he did was very wrong. I guess its just the second guessing the what ifs - if he had a better lawyer etc etc, I think truly the only thing a paid lawyer would have done was make me feel a bit better but the outcome was in the judges hands and probably been the same anyway. I know that 3 1/2 will go by but at the same time I will miss him I also don't want to wish my life away. I want to enjoy these 3 years too I think that is more why I am so sad I don't want to wish my life away -I have other kids and a life, I'm sure in time once he is settled I will get back alot of it thou! Thanks for the wisdom

Originally Posted by Tracy147

This may help you deal with the 31/2 yrs better. My son was sentenced to 5-15 yrs. He can get out in 5yrs. I felt everything you are feeling right now, 5yrs my son will be gone, how can I do this. One day I was on here and reading the thread about "Parents with children doing 10yrs +. After reading the stories and feeling their pain, 5yrs didnt seem like nothing compared to what those other poor parents are going thru. Another thread was about "having more than one child in prison. I feel very thankful that I will get my son home soon, these others have a life time to wait. Three yrs will go by faster than you think, I remember the day my son (17) at the time was taken, It was like yesterday, well its been 5yrs and we made it thru. Just waiting to see when he will be released. Its a nitemare right now, give it time and it will be a memory that you can put away forever. Take care, Big hugs... Tracy

[ajpsmom]

Wow your situation is very stressful I feel for you. I wish you luck wtih your sister. My middle son is actually staying with my brother right now he had his own business and after we took care of all his finances and saved him from loosen his house we are trying to save the business. My son was unemployeed as fate had it and a very quick learner so he is hoping to bring around the business at least long enough for us to sell the house. My son who is away was originally going to help out my brother but I guess that wasn't meant to be. I guess alot of us get hit with a S**T load of "Only what we can handle" Must be a nice calm place set up in heaven for us all someday!!!! LOL

Originally Posted by alexsci

Ajpsmom, my son also has to serve 85% and I am still doing the roller coaster emotional thing but at least I know the date he will get out. We don't have to worry about "good time" and seeing the parole board. Small comfort but wondering what parole will say is another emotional ride. My son will have to serve an additional three years of supervised parole after he is released but one step at a time.
My daughter and I went on a mother-daughter trip right after he was sentenced and that was really hard for me to do. My younger sister had a stroke right before I left and I was going to cancel because she is all alone...my brother-in-law died recently. My husband insisted that I go and said he would take care of everything with my sister. I'm really glad I went...I felt almost normal again. Now that I'm home it seems that everything has hit the fan. My sister had a second stroke and is totally paralyzed on her left side. I went thru her house and bills and it seems she has been hiding a lot of problems from me. She knows that I would always be there for her but I guess she probably thought of me as the "bossy big sister". Everything is in such disarray that I think she must have been having mini strokes before this. I came home from my sister's house and jokingly told my hubby "Shoot me now 'cause I don't have a clue how to help her except to take a bulldozer to her house". *Sigh* We'll get thru this, too. I didn't visit her tonight because I needed to stay home and login here and I refuse to feel guilty about that. Both she and my son sound the same on the phone....trapped and miserable but we'll all need some time to get used to our new situations. Hang in there.

[ajpsmom]

I am so thankful for this site can't even imagine getting though all this without it! One thing for sure is I know I was lead here and I am so greatful to have found you all! We are the only ones to understand the pain, the heartache and also the anger! I hope soon I will get to a point that I can come and share happy stories of finally being at peace with this and get on with my life. I know with all your help it will come! Thanks

[jancy]

just sending a note to say I am thinking about you!

[janicejackson]

Originally Posted by angel mathews

Geez I never rains but in sure does pour Try and take it one day at a time and if that does'nt work one moment at a time or even one second at a time every thing happens for a reason and as you said your son could have gotten much more time the power of prayer is a powerful tool and i stand behind 100%

now how to install your ticker


Go to www.tickerfactory.com
About 2/3 of way done click on Event

First choose a ticker ruler (note if you don’t see any on the first page click on the underlined numbers at the bottom of the page) (don't click next).

After you choose the ruler (by clicking on the dot next to it) - then click on Next.

Then you choose your ticker slider the same way you chose your ruler - then you click on Next.

Enter the date your LO is getting out, right in what the event is and then put the current date and time then you click on Next.

Under the bb code is a box with URL in it. You will need to copy all of the address beginning at http all the way to the end at .png. You actually highlight it all and right click on it and click on copy. (Note don’t choose the img at the beginning or the end).

Go to Prison Talk User CP – Control Panel and click on Edit Signature.

Click on “Insert Image” (this is above message box to the right – it looks like a picture of a mountain with a sun in the corner)

A Box with the http should come up and you will right click in the box and click on paste then click on OK. Your ticker should come up in the message box. You then click on “Preview Signature” at the bottom and if it looks ok then click on Save Signature



If this does'nt work copy and paste I have done the copy and paste often and it still will work ((((hugs)))) Angel

Thank you so much for the instructions on the ruler It took me a couple of tries but I finally got it.

[janicejackson]

All of you have touched my heart. I am so dreading the sentencing the unknown. I have been hoping for the best but deep down inside I know it could be very bad. I'm talking 10 years. I know that in state prison that they get time knocked off for good behavior but does that work in federal prison? My thoughts are with all of ya and I share your pain. Please lets all keep strong and keep up the faith God is the only judge we will have to face. Thank to all of you I don't know what I would do without this site and I accidentally found it. I have just lost my 16 year old grandson Jaylee to cancer he lived with me and was like my son and like a little brother to Wiley, my son, Wiley had to miss the funeral and it was hard on all the family. Having this site is a release of some bottled up tension. It helps to be able to talk, it seems like the family doesn't even want to ask how Wiley is because they don't want to talk about him because they are ashamed of him. Here everyone wants to know and I can talk freely about the jail, his health, his mental state etc... and also my feelings. Thank you all again. Janice

[heavy]

Originally Posted by janicejackson

All of you have touched my heart. I am so dreading the sentencing the unknown. I have been hoping for the best but deep down inside I know it could be very bad. I'm talking 10 years. I know that in state prison that they get time knocked off for good behavior but does that work in federal prison? My thoughts are with all of ya and I share your pain. Please lets all keep strong and keep up the faith God is the only judge we will have to face. Thank to all of you I don't know what I would do without this site and I accidentally found it. I have just lost my 16 year old grandson Jaylee to cancer he lived with me and was like my son and like a little brother to Wiley, my son, Wiley had to miss the funeral and it was hard on all the family. Having this site is a release of some bottled up tension. It helps to be able to talk, it seems like the family doesn't even want to ask how Wiley is because they don't want to talk about him because they are ashamed of him. Here everyone wants to know and I can talk freely about the jail, his health, his mental state etc... and also my feelings. Thank you all again. Janice

My Sympathy go out to you and your family on the lost of your grandson.If Ican be of any help let me know
Iwill keep you and your son in my Prayers.