Notice to new members intending to register - from January 9th 2012

pisces317 · #1 04-30-2012, 11:50 AM

SOMETIME AGO SOMEONE ASK me MARY would you do this again and i said hell no it was painful and a horrible experience not only the relationship but the whole shabang,visiting the co's the different women i met some were nice other's who had been visiting for longer acted as if the vans and buses were their personal items,being sick riding back and forth sometimes the cold,rain so even though my xx was horrific the whole prison things just stressed me out ,but as you continue to move through the chapters call life in a sick way i kinda miss some aspects of just meeting new things ppl and i can see me trying again not that i'm exploring anything just a thought of some of the nice women of which i found my bff from and she's the best thing left from those days and as i go on pen pals sites just curious nothing serious i always wonder should i try again is my man in prison,QUESTION IF IT DIDNT WORK THE FIRST TIME WOULD YOU TRY AGAIN KNOWING WHAT YOU DIDNT KNOW BEFORE?????????????

Levi's wife · #2 04-30-2012, 01:38 PM

guess that same rule would apply to the outside world too.....just cause you may have had a bad experience...dont let that stop you....as they say were one door closes another one opens...so maybe your prince charming is out there waiting on you to write him.....dont hold a bad experience against all....ya never know what you might be missing out on......

Iamonlyme75 · #3 04-30-2012, 02:20 PM

I tried it once it did not work for me. As for myself I wont even consider trying it again but thats me. Is my prince charming locked up? perhaps he is but if so we will meet on the outside.

Prison relationships are not for everyone but for some they work great.

countryzgirl · #4 04-30-2012, 02:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pisces317

SOMETIME AGO SOMEONE ASK me MARY would you do this again and i said hell no it was painful and a horrible experience not only the relationship but the whole shabang,visiting the co's the different women i met some were nice other's who had been visiting for longer acted as if the vans and buses were their personal items,being sick riding back and forth sometimes the cold,rain so even though my xx was horrific the whole prison things just stressed me out ,but as you continue to move through the chapters call life in a sick way i kinda miss some aspects of just meeting new things ppl and i can see me trying again not that i'm exploring anything just a thought of some of the nice women of which i found my bff from and she's the best thing left from those days and as i go on pen pals sites just curious nothing serious i always wonder should i try again is my man in prison,QUESTION IF IT DIDNT WORK THE FIRST TIME WOULD YOU TRY AGAIN KNOWING WHAT YOU DIDNT KNOW BEFORE?????????????

I won't do this again. Not with this man if he goes back or with another one. This life blows, IMO. I chose to ride out this bid- I don't regret it but it's not an experience I need or want to go through again.
Relationships are challenging enough without all the things you mentioned, "the whole shabang,visiting the co's the different women i met some were nice other's who had been visiting for longer acted as if the vans and buses were their personal items [LOL BTW],being sick riding back and forth sometimes the cold,rain so even though my xx was horrific the whole prison things just stressed me out..."
You say you, "..kinda miss some aspects of just meeting new things ppl..."
Hon, you can meet new people and enjoy new things without prison. In fact, you already KNOW prison...not much is gonna be new to you if you choose this path again.
I don't know what's best for you, of course. But IMO you've been there, done that. Why not go out and explore new, more rewarding ways to meet people? If that doesn't work there will always be Prison Pen Pals for you to come back to.
Good luck!

hisbabygurl2014 · #5 04-30-2012, 02:51 PM

I personally wouldnt if this relationship didnt work for me. But if it did i would say i wouldnt do a second bid with him, because it was hard enough the first time why would you put me and you in that position again? you know. I feel as though thats really selfish. But again you could say that about guys who are out of prison, would you give them second chances..but i believe thats a different enviroment and situations and you get to know the person more tha ever. But hey everyone is different.

**Patty** · #6 04-30-2012, 02:53 PM

I wouldn't go looking for an inmate to fall in love with but then I didn't in the first place. I am not the check out the penpal sites type of person and my man is not the put up ad type so if we hadn't met by accident well we just wouldn't have met.

I am of the belief that incarcerated persons are like those of us who are not in prison, diverse, unique, and wholly human. One might have misstepped with one and would do well with another, just like anywhere else. Here is my fear though...

I've been with PTO for many years now, even when my man is home I am here because of my staff position. I see and hear a lot of things and I would be remiss if I were not to mention the abundance of "serial" MWIers we have come across. Some women have had numerous MWI relationships and none have been the "right" one for them. This speaks volumes. This life is not for everyone. Some people have issues and agendas of their own that compel them to continue to seek out these types of relationships, over and over and over again. And let's not forget the fact that there are lots of men to choose from in the free world.

My hope is that women who have recently ended a relationship whether or not prison is involved will move forward and find happiness on their own before pursuing a new relationship. Not to be crude but a man should be like a great purse, he goes with the fabulous outfit you already own!

jekkaa6 · #7 04-30-2012, 06:55 PM

Well, I would not look for a man in prison to communicate with, nor would I be with another guy if he went to prison. However, if my now husband went back in, I would most definately stand by him. I love him and there are very few things that would force me to alk away...another sentence is not one of them.

Miss_A · #8 04-30-2012, 07:12 PM

Not only are there serial MWI'ers, there are serial repeat offenders and women who stand by them. I think people often forget that. There's a whole gamut of serial this and serial that.

I, myself, have been on this site many years and I often see members stating they'll never do this or that and then the next thing you know, here they are doing the very thing they said they would NEVER do.

I've learned that you won't truly know what you'll do in any given situation until you're presented with it.

hisbabyny · #9 04-30-2012, 11:33 PM

i cant say that i wouldnt be there for my guy if he went back in once released, because i do think that technical violations are very easy to occur, i dont know what i would do' but i doubt i would desert him....
i seriously doubt that i would attempt even a friendship in a penpal situation or a friend having me write someone in prison. i dont want to say never' cause 25 years ago i said ill never wait for a man in prison and now 25 years later of my own free will i choose to wait for this man.

but i do not think i would actively seek this life.

its very hard to love and miss someone and go thru the prison lifestyle. my man and i RWI because he was looking for someone and contacted me.
so we ended up kind of by accident with our paths crossing....Neither one of us had any kind of thought or intention of what ended up happening. I'm happy because i truly believe it was meant to happen at this time in our lives. when i was younger i dont think i could have been as committed. i also know alot about my man's characteristics from the outside that would never be understood or known from the visiting room or our communications. i believe you can find love anywhere, but i dont think i would ever want to be a serial mwi' and to me that says their some issue's also' maybe its the extra attention and time that men dont normally give out in the free world when they are very busy' all the romantic words.

i guess its good i dont get the jail talk cause i could see how addictive it could be. i have read of mwi couples that have made it successful so i think if its meant to be then it will be. yes' i am aware of some woman addicted to the prison lifestyle, but i would never choose this lifestyle, its too hard.

brooks · #10 05-01-2012, 08:10 AM

NO WAY ! But I now have children & they come FIRST. It's hell visiting with children.

LoveMyMeche · #11 05-02-2012, 04:08 PM

I would/will NEVER do this again. Had he and I not been together before this, me waiting for him to come home, would never have happened. I would never ELECT this type of relationship. And as much and as deeply as I love him, if he goes back, I'm gone!!! He has to do his part and that means stay out of trouble.

Tjames85 · #12 05-04-2012, 03:30 PM

Would I go back and never have gotten into a relationship with my ex? no. I have learned so much about myself because of that messed up relationship.

Would I ever give my ex another chance? hell no! If my ex somehow became the perfect mixture of bill gates, mother Teresa, Shamar Moore, and was able to making me King of my own nation I still wouldn't give him another chance. I tried. Lord knows I tried. I gave it my all and it wasn't good enough. We were not meant to be and I thank God for that. The most accurate thing my ex ever said to me was I belong with her because we are both crazy. Yes they were.

Would I ever go through this MWI thing again. The dude would have to be a combination of, not my ex, as intelligent as bill gates, as loving as mother Teresa, as attractive as Shamar Moore, with Jay Z's charisma and as funny as George Carlin. I love my man but this MWI business is tough.