He broke up with me after 3 1/2 years - I need your support, ladies!

[Rachel C]

I HOPE you get on this site every few days and read your posts. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you, and I hope you're faring well. Sending warm thoughts and hugs your way, have a good week.

[pj663]

Originally Posted by Just Jen

I've read this whole thread, every single word. I've put myself in your shoes and I've cried bitter tears. I've put myself in his shoes and felt in helpless despair. Some of the responses you've received are just plain stupid and immature, in my honest opinion, from people who have very little insight into other people at all. There's a lot of speculation about other women, shady activity, reasons for his lying, blah blah blah. It is my opinion that he has given you all the answers to your questions. They just seem too simple to comprehend. Don't over think this. All of the love he has for you, and the things he spoke of wanting to share with you were all true. But to him it was a beautiful dream that got to happen in someone else's life. It wasn't meant to be for him; it was a broken dream that was shattered by a 20-year sentence. The two of you together have held tight to this sharp and twisted reality, and I really believe that he is not willing to watch you bloody your hands on this anymore. This isn't your sentence, and he won't let you serve it. If he seems cold and unfeeling now, I think it's just that he's had to put up brick walls to keep from breaking. It's a hard life in there, and he can't afford to be vulnerable. If you know the man, and you do, then you know that his motivations are true. Love him in the way that he has asked and walk away.

Just Jen,

Germangirl originally began this thread with the intent to not only get support but to get advice and diffrent perspectives about her situation. Along the way I'm sure she heard things that were blunt but possibly true, half truths coming from a diffrent point of view or simply someone being sympathetic to her situation. Because it is a public forum these are some of the responses that she will get. Since a few of us here dont personally know her (accept online) or her ex naturally we would know little about the situation so our responses are as good as the information that is provided here. I'm sure that in the end we all want the very best for her.

[GermanGirl_28]

Originally Posted by pj663

Just Jen,

Germangirl originally began this thread with the intent to not only get support but to get advice and diffrent perspectives about her situation. Along the way I'm sure she heard things that were blunt but possibly true, half truths coming from a diffrent point of view or simply someone being sympathetic to her situation. Because it is a public forum these are some of the responses that she will get. Since a few of us here dont personally know her (accept online) or her ex naturally we would know little about the situation so our responses are as good as the information that is provided here. I'm sure that in the end we all want the very best for her.

I agree and like I have said before I do appreciate every comment that is being made. The kind words are balm on my wounded soul, some comments challenged me to think in a different direction, others were eye-opening... This forum helps me to cope with the situation and for that I am grateful.

[daisybaby]

Originally Posted by GermanGirl_28

You are right... I understand now that there is no sense in pushing him any further to give me answers or to explain himself. I think I will definitely send him a birthday card and that won't be until October. Not sure if I will write something else sooner than that, but for now it is his turn if he chooses to take it...

Hi GermanGirl_28 (: I just wanted to let you know that I've been keeping up with this thread because I feel for you so much :\ I wasn't sure what to say in this situation and decided it was best to let those who knew from experience (whether through their own or someone elses situation) on what advice to give to you. From the looks of it, it sounds like you've accepted the fact that you've done everything in your power to show him why you love him, and you're right....the ball is in his court now. A relationship can only go so far if only one person tries. I hope it all works out for the best. Either way, you're a super trooper in my book. I just wanted to make a quick comment on here to let you know that you've got a bunch of us here for support! Thank you for allowing us to help you cope and grieve with you in this unfortunate situation.

[GermanGirl_28]

Originally Posted by daisybaby

Hi GermanGirl_28 (: I just wanted to let you know that I've been keeping up with this thread because I feel for you so much :\ I wasn't sure what to say in this situation and decided it was best to let those who knew from experience (whether through their own or someone elses situation) on what advice to give to you. From the looks of it, it sounds like you've accepted the fact that you've done everything in your power to show him why you love him, and you're right....the ball is in his court now. A relationship can only go so far if only one person tries. I hope it all works out for the best. Either way, you're a super trooper in my book. I just wanted to make a quick comment on here to let you know that you've got a bunch of us here for support! Thank you for allowing us to help you cope and grieve with you in this unfortunate situation.

Thank you for your post. I was really touched. It's amazing how much support you can get and hoe much strength you can draw from people you only know online. This only proves that PTO is a big family and we all can relate better than sometimes our best friends out here...

[GermanGirl_28]

You know what I don't understand? At the last prison he was at he spent his last 3 months in the SHU. Some guys wanted him to do a hit and he refused and chose to go to the SHU instead for protection, because these guys came after him. Those three months were really difficult at times. I wrote him at least 5 times a week and he wrote me as often as possible, which was 3-4 times a week as well. It took forever to get his letters in reply to mine, but we managed and got through that. He had one 15-min phone call a month that he used on me. Then he finally got transferred to the new prison. Everything went back to normal pretty quickly. He got to know people, found a new cell that he liked, etc. I made sure he had enough money to get what he needed, we talked on the phone once a week and emails everyday. No more letters though, because they just take way too long to get to me. We knew since the beginning of the year that he would eventually get transferred to a lower security prison at some point. The SHU just made that process move along a lot faster actually. I hadn't booked my flight, because we didn't know where he would be going. So I waited and the prices went up. Then he got transferred and we finally knew what airport I would have to fly into. By that time the prices where outrageously expensive, but I didn't care. We needed to see each other. The last time I saw him was May 2011. He didn't even send me a picture of himself in between then and now! Anyways, so I bought the flight on April 25. He broke up with me on May 29. ONE MONTH LATER?! How can he so completely change his mind about us in like a month?

I wish I would somehow find the answers that I need! It's so frustrating to have lost someone who was the best thing that ever happened to you and not even know why. That just kills me and makes me tear up.

On here people always talk about the so called "red flags" and I keep wondering if there were any or not. And if there were, did I simply not see them or did I ignore them? The only thing I know for sure is that he was not 100% invested in terms of sharing his feelings and keeping the romance alive. He would write me everyday and he would always tell me that he misses me and that he loves me, but never anything more than that. On the phone he also wasn't super lovey-dovery. I mean, I know he is not exactly the type to be all over the place with his feelings and he doesn't really like to talk about his feelings, but still... a little more would have been nice. There was one time where I felt really sad, because I felt like he didn't need me at all. I wrote him an email and as a response he called me outside of our arranged schedule. I asked him why he was calling and he said that in my email I sounded like I needed it. I told him how I felt and his response was "Trust me, baby, I need you! You mean the world to me." So he was able to say things like that, but mostly he didn't do it without promptings from my side. Another thing that I was wondering about was his allocation of phone calls. They have 20 calls that are 15 minutes each. He only used 4-5 calls on me per month. Where did the rest of those calls go? I know he called his brother and his Mom and maybe he grandma. I know those calls go quickly, but still... 8 calls a month would have been fair I think. A third thing that I was wondering about where pictures. When his Mom would send him pictures of something (like his daughter) he always sent those all the way to Germany, so that I could make copies for him. (By the way, that tells you who was always there for him providing for his needs and wants!) Sometimes he wanted 5-10 copies of pictures and I was wondering who he would send them to. I asked him and he said that he still has a few friends from before he went to prison. I was surprised and asked him why he never talks about them and why I have never heard about them... He was so closed up about certain things. He would never talk about anything that went on at the prison and he had a hard time sharing his thoughts. Even when you have the same routine every day and are bored to death, shouldn't there be conversations that you have with others or occasions where you are annoyed or happy or frustrated? He never talked about anything really and that was something that had been bothering me. You can't keep a relationship alive if you keep getting the same routine emails every day. After a few days I already knew that he had just gotten out of bed and was on his way to eat breakfast and then exercise. But still, he had nothing else to write about, so I knew that this was gonna be the content of his first email of the day.

I tried to be understanding. I didn't want to stress him out. The new prison, new people, new surroundings... we hadn't seen each other in over a year. Sometimes I thought that he had kinda forgotten what it felt like to be together... that he had forgotten how the love actually FELT that he had for me. I could be totally wrong with all of this, too... Who knows!

[hisbbgirl]

Wow! Girl continue to do what u do love him!!! Hes going thru it. Just continue to love that man he'll get it. Best of luck..

[MitchsLady214]

In response to his letter in the original thread. He is a GOOD MAN that ACTUALLY LOVES AND CARES ABOUT YOU!!! My Fiance would do the same thing if he had a long sentence!! He would want me to have a man around to take care of me and hold me and love me because he can't. What they don't understand is THEY are who we want!! It's not like we say "Hey I want my man to be incarcerated and live that lifestyle!!" HELL NO!! We want our man at home with us and living a "normal" life. I understand where he is coming from but I also know where you are coming from. When you love someone so deeply it doesn't matter who they are, where they are, what they look like or what they do for a living. It's all about THEM!! I couldn't EVER leave my man ever no matter how long he got. Hes a dime in a sea of pennies. We also have a baby girl together

[hisbbgirl]

Originally Posted by GermanGirl_28

I am finally done putting all my thoughts on paper. One week and 6 pages later I am ready to send it to him. Do you think he will love me enough to write back? I told him that I still want to come see him, even if it's just for a day, so that we can have a chance to talk about everything in person.

I know there is a chance that he will simply ignore my letter and never ever write me or talk to me again. It breaks my heart! Any advise on how to prepare myself for the worse?

Go see him! U already have it set up just go. I really hope u guys can work it out I can tell there is lots of love u can't just let that go!

[msgreenthumb67]

Yes...you said the ticket is non-refundable. You should use it...if nothing else see the truth with your own eyes??? Idk. I've had someone I loved dump me out of the blue too (not incarcerated) ....turned out he had met someone else. Hopefully nothing like that is your case. God bless you, go with you and comfort you. May He prepare the way before you so you will know at least whether to keep holding on or to let go, grieve and move on. In my case, I never saw or heard from him again so I had no choice but to grieve and move on. Thank God for the wonderful, loving man in my life now! He is incarcerated but loves me like no one EVER had before!! I pray this works out for the best for you and him!! Bonnie

1 Corinthians 1:25-29

[pj663]

Originally Posted by GermanGirl_28

You know what I don't understand? At the last prison he was at he spent his last 3 months in the SHU. Some guys wanted him to do a hit and he refused and chose to go to the SHU instead for protection, because these guys came after him. Those three months were really difficult at times. I wrote him at least 5 times a week and he wrote me as often as possible, which was 3-4 times a week as well. It took forever to get his letters in reply to mine, but we managed and got through that. He had one 15-min phone call a month that he used on me. Then he finally got transferred to the new prison. Everything went back to normal pretty quickly. He got to know people, found a new cell that he liked, etc. I made sure he had enough money to get what he needed, we talked on the phone once a week and emails everyday. No more letters though, because they just take way too long to get to me. We knew since the beginning of the year that he would eventually get transferred to a lower security prison at some point. The SHU just made that process move along a lot faster actually. I hadn't booked my flight, because we didn't know where he would be going. So I waited and the prices went up. Then he got transferred and we finally knew what airport I would have to fly into. By that time the prices where outrageously expensive, but I didn't care. We needed to see each other. The last time I saw him was May 2011. He didn't even send me a picture of himself in between then and now! Anyways, so I bought the flight on April 25. He broke up with me on May 29. ONE MONTH LATER?! How can he so completely change his mind about us in like a month?

I wish I would somehow find the answers that I need! It's so frustrating to have lost someone who was the best thing that ever happened to you and not even know why. That just kills me and makes me tear up.

On here people always talk about the so called "red flags" and I keep wondering if there were any or not. And if there were, did I simply not see them or did I ignore them? The only thing I know for sure is that he was not 100% invested in terms of sharing his feelings and keeping the romance alive. He would write me everyday and he would always tell me that he misses me and that he loves me, but never anything more than that. On the phone he also wasn't super lovey-dovery. I mean, I know he is not exactly the type to be all over the place with his feelings and he doesn't really like to talk about his feelings, but still... a little more would have been nice. There was one time where I felt really sad, because I felt like he didn't need me at all. I wrote him an email and as a response he called me outside of our arranged schedule. I asked him why he was calling and he said that in my email I sounded like I needed it. I told him how I felt and his response was "Trust me, baby, I need you! You mean the world to me." So he was able to say things like that, but mostly he didn't do it without promptings from my side. Another thing that I was wondering about was his allocation of phone calls. They have 20 calls that are 15 minutes each. He only used 4-5 calls on me per month. Where did the rest of those calls go? I know he called his brother and his Mom and maybe he grandma. I know those calls go quickly, but still... 8 calls a month would have been fair I think. A third thing that I was wondering about where pictures. When his Mom would send him pictures of something (like his daughter) he always sent those all the way to Germany, so that I could make copies for him. (By the way, that tells you who was always there for him providing for his needs and wants!) Sometimes he wanted 5-10 copies of pictures and I was wondering who he would send them to. I asked him and he said that he still has a few friends from before he went to prison. I was surprised and asked him why he never talks about them and why I have never heard about them... He was so closed up about certain things. He would never talk about anything that went on at the prison and he had a hard time sharing his thoughts. Even when you have the same routine every day and are bored to death, shouldn't there be conversations that you have with others or occasions where you are annoyed or happy or frustrated? He never talked about anything really and that was something that had been bothering me. You can't keep a relationship alive if you keep getting the same routine emails every day. After a few days I already knew that he had just gotten out of bed and was on his way to eat breakfast and then exercise. But still, he had nothing else to write about, so I knew that this was gonna be the content of his first email of the day.

I tried to be understanding. I didn't want to stress him out. The new prison, new people, new surroundings... we hadn't seen each other in over a year. Sometimes I thought that he had kinda forgotten what it felt like to be together... that he had forgotten how the love actually FELT that he had for me. I could be totally wrong with all of this, too... Who knows!

Sometimes the distance and time away can be difficult. Out of site out of mind sad but true. As for the phone calls I think that since you moved back home maybe he's just considering you and the cost. One thing that proabley would give me deer ears is that fact that before he was sending all of his pictures and things home now out of the blue he has friends to do that? Do you know these new friends? T The other is visiting. Even you said that you didnt think that his mother would utilize that time. Could it be more to it? . You know what? You coming back to life!!! The dead has risen!! You will eventually get your answers if you choose to continue pursuing however if the back of your mind is telling you something not right? Believe it. Good to see you responding and talking about this. We got you

[B's_daisy86]

Originally Posted by GermanGirl_28

My (ex-)boyfriend and I started out as MWI, we were officially together after one year of writing each other pretty much every day, phone calls, visits etc. I used to live in Chicago back then and he was in KY/VA. Then I had to move back to my home country Germany, which means that we have been having a long distance relationship since October 2009. Due to the distance, lack of money and some other circumstances I was only able to visit him again in April 2011. It was a long time, but we made it work and being with him during those days was the highlight of my year. We've been writing everyday, I have been supporting him financially, we were just making this whole thing work. We even talked about getting married and how we would get me back to the US so that we could finally be closer to each other and have a "normal" life as a couple. I am not gonna lie, we were having a long and difficult road ahead of us, but I strongly believe that somehow things would have worked out. I was planning to visit him again in July for two weekends and I even have my flight booked already. I was so much looking forward to this time with him!

This morning I got an email from him. He ended our relationship. This was a few hours ago and I am still in shock. He is MY LOVE, MY LIFE, MY EVERYTHING. I can't even imagine what it is like to be without him.

Here is what he wrote to me:

there comes a point in a mans life when he has to step up to his responsibilities and do the right thing no matter how hard it is or who gets hurt.
the truth of the matter is that you and I are both fighting a losing battle and living in a fantasy world. you've invested way too much into something that is just holding you back from something bigger and better and it makes me sick to be the one with the rope in my hands. I know that you'd probably put up a pretty good argument and say that it's an investment but I can promise you that it's not. you're literally wasting you life away bc of me and in the end your prize will be an old man, no children, no grand children, an estranged family, and a lost life, and I wont be a party to it, I love you too much for that.
I've been selfish to hold on for so long and keep your life on pause... and this is not a negotiation or a decision that you can argue, I've made up my mind and every day that goes by makes it harder on the both of us.
what hurts the most is knowing that our dreams will never com true and this is the way my life has to be behind these walls, but this is something that I'm going to have to do alone and not drag someone through it with me...
most men in here would probably tell me I'm crazy for this bc you are a very good , solid girlfriend but this goes beyond me and is about something more than my feelings and my life.. this is about doing what's right and not just thinking about what's right but actually standing up and making sure that it's done.. you might not think too much of me for it today but one day you will look back on it and you will see that I was doing this for you bc it had to be done.
knowing you , you're sitting there thinking it has something to do with how you look or something you said, or your personality or a million other things that have nothing at all to do with the truth... but I can assure you that this is all about me wanting something more for you than this.
after today I don't want you to send me anymore money or help me out in any way shape or form. I want you to stay focused and I want you to start living your life '' today '' . I want you to get over this and move on and in the end I want you to be happy!! you might not see that happening in the near future but I can promise you that you will be and in turn that's going to make me happy as well so if you truly love me can you please do that for me ???
like I said b4, this is not a debate, this is the way it has to be and this is the way it's going to be and if it doesn't happen now I'm never going to forgive myself for the rest of my life... so please don't argue with me about this..
I know this is all going to be hard for you to swallow..it was really hard for me to write but I know it my heart that it's the right thing to do.. know that I will always love you and I really hope that you wont hate me for ending things like this but if I don't do it you will never have all the things that you want in life and I'm not going to be the piece of shit that does that to you... I hope you understand and I really hope you don't hate me for too long..

I know him and he is very determined once he has made up his mind. There is no argument I can come up with that will change his mind. He thinks he is doing this for me and because he thinks it's the best for me.

Ladies, I desperately need your support right now! What am I supposed to do now? How am I supposed to respond to this????

I'm on the verge of tears right now, I hurt for u, for him..but I believe he means everything he says cause' he is giving up u taking care of him..thats love...a beautiful but painful love. When is he supposed to get out??

[Peaceismine]

Go with your gut feeling. It sounds like you won't be able to move on until you get answers. I know I couldn't.
If it doesn't feel right it probably isn't. Just be true to yourself. I hope you find the answers you seek and I pray it gets easier for you.
((((((((Hugs)))))))) I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

[B's_daisy86]

Originally Posted by GermanGirl_28

I agree with you. I am worth to be with someone without convincing. As much as it hurts, I don't want to be with someone, who doesn't want me anymore. My head knows that. My heart still has a hard time with it though.

The head and heart always seem to conflict with each other when it comes to love, it can be troubling. which to listen to ya know?

[Jootje]

Please do not take this the wrong way because I mean it with the best intrest but to me it seems to me that since you are not getting your answers from him, you are going through your past day by day to seek for answers. You are putting things, that did not see fishy at the time nor did you consider it a redflagg at the time, on a scale and see if you can find answers.....I do think this is a phase, a very hurtfull one but hopefully one you will get through and start healing. And do not get me wrong because I personally think that if I were in your shoes I would be doing the same thing: looking for answers to get closure.

You have send him emails from the bottom of your heart, and he has not responded....consider that as your closure because it looks like he is not willing to help you with that.

You have got a long and hurtfull road ahead of you before you will wake up one morning and realize you made it through the hurt and tears and answers and understanding why he broke up may always be a big question mark but I, as long as many woman here, have your back and keeping you in our prayers to stay strong!!

[cccthomas]

InmateLover67 I understand you saying that german girl needs to move on but what about her feelings she did not have a say in this relationship too? If you ask me your not being to noble breaking up with someone you supposedly loved for 3 and a half years thru a email thats pretty cowardly and cold no matter how good he made it sound.

[GermanGirl_28]

Originally Posted by cccthomas

InmateLover67 I understand you saying that german girl needs to move on but what about her feelings she did not have a say in this relationship too? If you ask me your not being to noble breaking up with someone you supposedly loved for 3 and a half years thru a email thats pretty cowardly and cold no matter how good he made it sound.

There are for sure better ways to break up with someone. He could have handled the situation better and differently, especially because he knows how much he is hurting me...not just with the break-up, but also with his behaviour. Maybe one day I will know why he did what he did. Maybe he was simply overwhelmed and truly didn't know any better?!

[GermanGirl_28]

Originally Posted by pj663

Sometimes the distance and time away can be difficult. Out of site out of mind sad but true. As for the phone calls I think that since you moved back home maybe he's just considering you and the cost. One thing that proabley would give me deer ears is that fact that before he was sending all of his pictures and things home now out of the blue he has friends to do that? Do you know these new friends? T The other is visiting. Even you said that you didnt think that his mother would utilize that time. Could it be more to it? . You know what? You coming back to life!!! The dead has risen!! You will eventually get your answers if you choose to continue pursuing however if the back of your mind is telling you something not right? Believe it. Good to see you responding and talking about this. We got you

I think you misunderstood. I always get a local US number from the city he is at. When he would call me, it only cost him as much as a short distance call and I wad the only one to ever put money on his books. Regarding the pictures... His Mom would literally take ages to get anything done. At first he always asked her to send him copies, but it was a lot faster and more reliable when I did it for him even being do far away. I don't know any of his old friends... When I asked him he gave me their names and said that those where from his college days...not any of the people from his "drug days". For the most part I believed him.

As far as the visit is concerned... I think I am going to write his sister-in-law again and ask her if his Mom and daughter really did use up all the points or if he just told her that. Originally, I was going to visit him two weekends in a row: Thursday evening, Friday evening and all of Saturday and the second weekend Thursday evening, fridau evening, all of Sunday and Monday evening. I already made plans for the second weekend, since this prison is in the middle of nowhere and there is no way I am wasting my vacation like that. For the first weekend I could rent a car and drive down to see him.

But what if he really doesn't have any points left?
What if he took me off his list?
What if I get there and he refuses to come to the visitation room to see me?

[becky7722]

I really feel for you, so much. Knowing how much I love my man I wouldn't beable to breathe if he ended things. We met before he got put away. You have to go and find out, I hope with all my heart you get the answers you need.

[b_ambuehl]

Just go and visit him anyway. Either he comes out and you get some answers or if he refuses your visit he'll get it from other inmates/staff.

[GermanGirl_28]

Originally Posted by b_ambuehl

Just go and visit him anyway. Either he comes out and you get some answers or if he refuses your visit he'll get it from other inmates/staff.

What do you mean by "he'll get it from other inmates/staff"?

[pj663]

Originally Posted by GermanGirl_28

I think you misunderstood. I always get a local US number from the city he is at. When he would call me, it only cost him as much as a short distance call and I wad the only one to ever put money on his books. Regarding the pictures... His Mom would literally take ages to get anything done. At first he always asked her to send him copies, but it was a lot faster and more reliable when I did it for him even being do far away. I don't know any of his old friends... When I asked him he gave me their names and said that those where from his college days...not any of the people from his "drug days". For the most part I believed him.

As far as the visit is concerned... I think I am going to write his sister-in-law again and ask her if his Mom and daughter really did use up all the points or if he just told her that. Originally, I was going to visit him two weekends in a row: Thursday evening, Friday evening and all of Saturday and the second weekend Thursday evening, fridau evening, all of Sunday and Monday evening. I already made plans for the second weekend, since this prison is in the middle of nowhere and there is no way I am wasting my vacation like that. For the first weekend I could rent a car and drive down to see him.

But what if he really doesn't have any points left?
What if he took me off his list?
What if I get there and he refuses to come to the visitation room to see me?

Ok I get it love so something else to make you go knowing that you have a US number, You put money on his books to enable the calls and now it's reduced? As for the visit I wouldnt ask the family anything else because their loyalty will be with him. I would caution you about making this trip. See if you can find out if you are still on the list. In cali sometimes when a person is not approved and they come from a distance sometimes they will make a exception and allow a visit depending on the circumstances and the prison. Now that's in cali I dont know how it would work where your ex is at. Think about it before you make the trip. If you feel that this trip would be worth losing your money and time and possibly your mind ( That rhymes) then take the trip. But if you want your dignity in tact take a step back and watch things unfold. You can love him from a distance while trying to find your closure to this.

[GermanGirl_28]

Originally Posted by pj663

Ok I get it love so something else to make you go knowing that you have a US number, You put money on his books to enable the calls and now it's reduced? As for the visit I wouldnt ask the family anything else because their loyalty will be with him. I would caution you about making this trip. See if you can find out if you are still on the list. In cali sometimes when a person is not approved and they come from a distance sometimes they will make a exception and allow a visit depending on the circumstances and the prison. Now that's in cali I dont know how it would work where your ex is at. Think about it before you make the trip. If you feel that this trip would be worth losing your money and time and possibly your mind ( That rhymes) then take the trip. But if you want your dignity in tact take a step back and watch things unfold. You can love him from a distance while trying to find your closure to this.

I am not entirely sure what you are asking... Are you asking if anyone else is putting money on his books now? I don't think so. I was his only source of income...

[pj663]

No love I didnt ask that I was saying that now it makes sense to me that you had a US number plus you enabled the phones calls by putting money on his books. So quite naturally you would be wtf??? 4 calls???I know where you are coming from love. I see that you were the only one making things happen from money on books, visiting, christmas presents oh trust I believe you sweetie.

[b_ambuehl]

Originally Posted by GermanGirl_28

What do you mean by "he'll get it from other inmates/staff"?

Refusing a visit is looked down upon by other inmates and staff. There are some stories around here about that.