Move Hundreds Of Miles To Be Near Him??

[SheO.Who]

My husband is in Cali and I'm hundreds of miles from him. It was my choice though because I was so angry with him when he got arrested, AGAIN! I told him if it happened again, I was leaving, so I did. Now he's looking at 10 - 15 and I am thinking of moving closer so I can visit him. I can't leave him! I love him so much! Should I move closer, or keep working hard, save money and fly to visit him? Need advice on this please! I know all of you understand what this feels like.

[InmateLover67]

Originally Posted by SheO.Who

My husband is in Cali and I'm hundreds of miles from him. It was my choice though because I was so angry with him when he got arrested, AGAIN! I told him if it happened again, I was leaving, so I did. Now he's looking at 10 - 15 and I am thinking of moving closer so I can visit him. I can't leave him! I love him so much! Should I move closer, or keep working hard, save money and fly to visit him? Need advice on this please! I know all of you understand what this feels like.

Would it benefit you to uproot everything where you are to move closer? Or would it be smarter to work, save money and fly to visit him? Only you know what is right....You CAN leave him, you are choosing not to and if that is what makes you happy then go for it.

Think long and hard before you uproot your life and move somewhere you would basically be starting over, and what is things don't work out between you two? I believe you have some things to think about and I would caution you on making a decision, until you have weighed out all of the pros and cons.

Peace~

[sweetcheeks_17]

Originally Posted by SheO.Who

My husband is in Cali and I'm hundreds of miles from him. It was my choice though because I was so angry with him when he got arrested, AGAIN! I told him if it happened again, I was leaving, so I did. Now he's looking at 10 - 15 and I am thinking of moving closer so I can visit him. I can't leave him! I love him so much! Should I move closer, or keep working hard, save money and fly to visit him? Need advice on this please! I know all of you understand what this feels like.

Yes i do know how it feels ive been going through it since 2008 we met in 2007 we got married in 2009 i have stood by him since 2007 he went to prison 8_28_07 i moved closer to hi m on Oct 3,2008 ive been living close by the prison since but he don't want to parole up here which is in 2015 so i hV to move again next year back down south

[MrsJlJohnson]

Originally Posted by SheO.Who

My husband is in Cali and I'm hundreds of miles from him. It was my choice though because I was so angry with him when he got arrested, AGAIN! I told him if it happened again, I was leaving, so I did. Now he's looking at 10 - 15 and I am thinking of moving closer so I can visit him. I can't leave him! I love him so much! Should I move closer, or keep working hard, save money and fly to visit him? Need advice on this please! I know all of you understand what this feels like.

My man is locked up in wy and I live in Ks and its about an 8hr drive one way but I chose to stay in Ks where my friends and family are and where my support system is job etc..This is not for everyone but it was what was best for me..I go a week or so every 3 months to go see him and that is good for me i would love to see him more but I want him to come home to me and the kids and have a nice life to come home too so we all dont have to start over so to speak..He says that he likes it this way too cause it keeps my home life per say from the prison life its seperated when i am home I work and live my life as usual and laugh love and live but when i go see him its up early to sit in prison all day to just see him and talk..those are my memories there and i have much better ones here and I dont schedule my life around him this way either..that makes the visits and time we do have so much more to us..but that is just us and everyone is dfferent I hope this gives you a little insight into your other option of staying and living your life while he lives his..no reason for you to give up ur life and opportunities because he chose to give up his..This might sound harsh but he made his bed and knew where it would lead so let him lay in it..Good luck on whatever you decide

[thatwiz]

He could be moved at any time. Makes no sense to move and then they move him 8 hours away or more.

[SheO.Who]

Originally Posted by sweetcheeks_17

Yes i do know how it feels ive been going through it since 2008 we met in 2007 we got married in 2009 i have stood by him since 2007 he went to prison 8_28_07 i moved closer to hi m on Oct 3,2008 ive been living close by the prison since but he don't want to parole up here which is in 2015 so i hV to move again next year back down south

That's a good idea to move back before your husband is released. I'm happy for you, that he's going to parole in 2015. That will come fast! I feel that I am his wife and I should stay by his side. If I leave him, it would destroy him and he needs to have hope and a reason to go on. When you moved to be closer to him, did you have family members to help you? My problem is, I have no one in California. My big concern is, will I find work near him? How was that for you?

[SheO.Who]

Originally Posted by thatwiz

He could be moved at any time. Makes no sense to move and then they move him 8 hours away or more.

That's true! You're right!

[SheO.Who]

Originally Posted by MrsJlJohnson

My man is locked up in wy and I live in Ks and its about an 8hr drive one way but I chose to stay in Ks where my friends and family are and where my support system is job etc..This is not for everyone but it was what was best for me..I go a week or so every 3 months to go see him and that is good for me i would love to see him more but I want him to come home to me and the kids and have a nice life to come home too so we all dont have to start over so to speak..He says that he likes it this way too cause it keeps my home life per say from the prison life its seperated when i am home I work and live my life as usual and laugh love and live but when i go see him its up early to sit in prison all day to just see him and talk..those are my memories there and i have much better ones here and I dont schedule my life around him this way either..that makes the visits and time we do have so much more to us..but that is just us and everyone is dfferent I hope this gives you a little insight into your other option of staying and living your life while he lives his..no reason for you to give up ur life and opportunities because he chose to give up his..This might sound harsh but he made his bed and knew where it would lead so let him lay in it..Good luck on whatever you decide

WOW! Sounds like a plan! My problem though is, 10 - 15 years. He still hasn't been sentenced yet. That's a long time! If it were 5 years, I would definitely do it that way. Perfect plan! My home is in Colorado and he's in Cali. Thank you and I will bring this up to him and let him know how well this works for ya'll.

[MrsJlJohnson]

I was talking to my husband about this and he brought up a good point too..INTERSTATE COMPACT...You can stay there and do as you do and instead of you being alone and having to start all over and stress over everyday life with noone constantly moving as he does through the system when he can be the one sent to a prison near you...ITs worth a shot

[SheO.Who]

Originally Posted by MrsJlJohnson

I was talking to my husband about this and he brought up a good point too..INTERSTATE COMPACT...You can stay there and do as you do and instead of you being alone and having to start all over and stress over everyday life with noone constantly moving as he does through the system when he can be the one sent to a prison near you...ITs worth a shot

You're kidding! I'm definitely going to check into that . Right now he's still in County Jail waiting to be sentenced. Then we'll see which prison he will be going too. It will probably take a long time to do "Interstate Compact". I know he's looking at 10 years minimum. I pray for that and not the 25 to Life. This 3 strikes law is cruel and unusual punishment! California is unbelievable! Thank you and I can't wait to bring that up to him when I talk to him tomorrow for our little 15 minute call.