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The Nimuay Domestic Violence Support Forum News and information relating to domestic violence in general. Please post here if you don't see a sub-forums that fits better.

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  #1  
Old 10-21-2018, 05:42 PM
blueeyescrying blueeyescrying is offline
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Default Anyone out there stayed and allowed to visit in prison

I don't normally use chat sites, however I need some help and don't know who else to ask. My fiance is incarcerated and he is sending out the visitor application, however one of the questions on it is "have you ever been the victim of abuse from this inmate", the answer would be yes and my application would be denied immediately. My question is, is there anyone out there that has been with someone that has physically abused them, but stayed with them and were you able to visit?
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Old 10-22-2018, 05:09 AM
ambermarshall11 ambermarshall11 is offline
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Yea I have I was with my child's father we live in NYS so maybe the rules are different we don't have to fill out an application for visits there was no order of protection had to do the counseling thing and all that and was able to visit do you have an order of protection in place if so it might be harder for you to visit I'm not sure how your state works
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Old 10-23-2018, 06:08 AM
cannedsud cannedsud is offline
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Originally Posted by ambermarshall11 View Post
Yea I have I was with my child's father we live in NYS so maybe the rules are different we don't have to fill out an application for visits there was no order of protection had to do the counseling thing and all that and was able to visit do you have an order of protection in place if so it might be harder for you to visit I'm not sure how your state works
Yeah, in your case it's acceptable since you have a child together.
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Old 10-23-2018, 06:10 AM
cannedsud cannedsud is offline
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Originally Posted by blueeyescrying View Post
I don't normally use chat sites, however I need some help and don't know who else to ask. My fiance is incarcerated and he is sending out the visitor application, however one of the questions on it is "have you ever been the victim of abuse from this inmate", the answer would be yes and my application would be denied immediately. My question is, is there anyone out there that has been with someone that has physically abused them, but stayed with them and were you able to visit?
So, you were honestly abused by your fiance? Hmm I haven't been in a similar situation nor know anyone who has been abused by their SO and still want to visit them. Well, I think you would still be able to visit under supervision and the application might be recorded for future reference in case the need arises.
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Old 10-23-2018, 06:29 AM
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Well, I think you would still be able to visit under supervision and the application might be recorded for future reference in case the need arises.
Would you kindly clarify on what basis you say this? Maybe post a link to where you got this information from?
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Old 10-23-2018, 06:38 AM
onedayatatime13 onedayatatime13 is offline
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Is there an order of protection? If so, you cannot contact him or visit.
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Old 10-23-2018, 08:08 AM
ambermarshall11 ambermarshall11 is offline
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I'm no longer with my child's father I don't no if it was acceptable or not I was young and trying to make it work for my childrens sake it wouldn't matter if we had kids or not and not really sure what your husband's situation is if he's in there for you then they might make you go for counseling or what not have the counslour write his counselor maybe get the stipulations off is there an order of protection
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Old 10-23-2018, 02:26 PM
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Marseille Marseille is offline
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Yeah, in your case it's acceptable since you have a child together.
You could have a dozen children together and it still wouldn’t be “acceptable”. Having children together does not make the prison any more likely to ignore the fact that someone was a victim of abuse st the hands of one of their guests.
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Old 02-05-2019, 04:54 PM
erinbug79 erinbug79 is offline
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Default Domestic abuse and standing by the abuser

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Originally Posted by blueeyescrying View Post
I don't normally use chat sites, however I need some help and don't know who else to ask. My fiance is incarcerated and he is sending out the visitor application, however one of the questions on it is "have you ever been the victim of abuse from this inmate", the answer would be yes and my application would be denied immediately. My question is, is there anyone out there that has been with someone that has physically abused them, but stayed with them and were you able to visit?
My boyfriend and I have been together 8 years. He went to prison for domestic abuse by strangulation and I was the victim. I did everything in my power to keep him from going to prison including hiring all his attorneys. To answer your question, yes I have been visiting him for 3 years, but my application in Oklahoma did not ask that question. Does it say your application will be denied if you answer yes or are you just assuming that since it asks that question you are automatically denied? They may just ask that question for security purposes. I just want to warn you if there are any records of him abusing you and you lie on your application they will deny you visitation and you could possibly get in a lot of trouble and get a huge fine. I hope that helps. I feel very sad for you right now because since I stood by my boyfriend not only was I still a victim (because he continued to abuse me every day) I was treated like a criminal by the justice system for staying with him and the way it made me feel is still indescribable.
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