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Friends & Families of Addicts Information for coping, dealing & living with a loved one's addictive behavior.

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  #1  
Old 11-21-2019, 05:44 PM
ambermarshall11 ambermarshall11 is offline
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Default Will He Use When He Gets Out?

My boyfriend is smoking K 2 in there what are the chances that he's going to use when he comes home from prison gets out on December 3
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  #2  
Old 11-21-2019, 07:51 PM
onedayatatime13 onedayatatime13 is offline
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If he is using in the inside, he will use on the outside. Prison has not deterred or changed him in any way.

If he has parole still, they will drug test him. K2 makes them do crazy stuff. His ride might be over for now, but he could end up right back in within a few months.

Prepare yourself for that
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  #3  
Old 11-21-2019, 07:57 PM
ambermarshall11 ambermarshall11 is offline
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Yes that's how it usually is every 4-5 months addiction is terrible he said he's changed and all this prison talk no I think makes him worse but that's where they put you when you violate parole
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Old 11-21-2019, 08:11 PM
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Are you able to go to an Nar-anon meeting?
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Old 11-21-2019, 08:15 PM
onedayatatime13 onedayatatime13 is offline
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He has to want to change and do better. No one else, no prgram.... he has to want it. You cannot save him. Do as Mia suggested and go to those meetings to learn more from professionals and those in the same situation.

You have a few weeks until he comes home, please go.
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Old 11-21-2019, 11:06 PM
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Are you able to go to an Nar-anon meeting?
Are we allowed to go i wasn't sure I will have to see if they have any in my area
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Old 11-21-2019, 11:08 PM
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He has to want to change and do better. No one else, no prgram.... he has to want it. You cannot save him. Do as Mia suggested and go to those meetings to learn more from professionals and those in the same situation.

You have a few weeks until he comes home, please go.
Are we allowed to just show up there he comes home the 3 Rd of December
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Old 11-21-2019, 11:08 PM
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Just by knowing your story a little through what you posted I would bet my last dollar he will use when he gets out. And he’s using now so why wouldn’t he out here? He is an addict. Please take the advice given and find some support for yourself. No one deserves anything like what your going through. He is very toxic and unhealthy. I really do hope you stick around and Keep getting support here. I wouldn’t send him a dime while he is inside and I would block the prisons phone number. Write him and tell him not to contact you. Let him decide if he wants to get clean and fight for a life or give up and keep using. I promise you until he gets sober or you get some counseling life will not change. Sober isn’t always the answer either I have an ex sober 31 years is a pure asshole still. They have to also want to have a change of personality, being, spirit whatever you want to call it.
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Old 11-21-2019, 11:33 PM
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Are we allowed to go i wasn't sure I will have to see if they have any in my area
Nar-anon is for you, not him. It's a support group for loved ones of substance abuse addicts.
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Old 11-22-2019, 05:09 AM
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Nar-anon is for you, not him. It's a support group for loved ones of substance abuse addicts.
Thank you I will call around later today and look into it
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Old 11-22-2019, 05:15 AM
ambermarshall11 ambermarshall11 is offline
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Just by knowing your story a little through what you posted I would bet my last dollar he will use when he gets out. And he’s using now so why wouldn’t he out here? He is an addict. Please take the advice given and find some support for yourself. No one deserves anything like what your going through. He is very toxic and unhealthy. I really do hope you stick around and Keep getting support here. I wouldn’t send him a dime while he is inside and I would block the prisons phone number. Write him and tell him not to contact you. Let him decide if he wants to get clean and fight for a life or give up and keep using. I promise you until he gets sober or you get some counseling life will not change. Sober isn’t always the answer either I have an ex sober 31 years is a pure asshole still. They have to also want to have a change of personality, being, spirit whatever you want to call it.
Thank you for your advice I guess he said that he can't bothee with me when he gets home he says I was cheating on him the whole time that he was locked up and he can't deal with that so I m ight get lucky my mom told me that it's all a mind game either way I will be safe if he wants to do something stupid then he will end right back up in prison thank you prison talk for the support it has helped me in many ways more then once I will definitely go on here when he comes home he said he's not coming to get his clothes or anything
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  #12  
Old 11-22-2019, 07:55 AM
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Originally Posted by ambermarshall11 View Post
Thank you I will call around later today and look into it
Please do. I attend one and it has helped me immensely. You will gain insight into a lot of the behaviors of the addict. It may even open up other avenues of support for you.

My man is an addict. Bobby has changed and is clean right now with the intention of staying that way. He never used while incarcerated. I am afraid I have to agree with everyone else. Your boyfriend will use and he will go back.

I am so sorry, Amber.
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Old 11-22-2019, 12:12 PM
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If he didnt bother with you, and didn't become a part of your life after he gets out of prison, that would be the best gift he could give you. I mean seriously, he can't control HIS life, so why would you even allow him to exert any control over yours?

You deserve far better than what he is incapable of delivering.
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  #14  
Old 11-22-2019, 07:53 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ambermarshall11 View Post
Thank you for your advice I guess he said that he can't bothee with me when he gets home he says I was cheating on him the whole time that he was locked up and he can't deal with that so I m ight get lucky my mom told me that it's all a mind game either way I will be safe if he wants to do something stupid then he will end right back up in prison thank you prison talk for the support it has helped me in many ways more then once I will definitely go on here when he comes home he said he's not coming to get his clothes or anything
I’m sorry, that hurts very much I am sure. I agree with your mom he sounds very immature and likes to play mind games. She sounds like my mom I had an ex that lived to get in your head and play games. My mom told me once why are letting him live in your head and take up space he isn’t paying rent. I hope you find peace and happiness in your life. Good luck!!
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Old 11-22-2019, 08:10 PM
onedayatatime13 onedayatatime13 is offline
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Please see this for what it is. He guilted you to take care of him on his screw up only to leave you when he doesnt need you any more.

It kills me to say this you this way because I know you are hurting.

The other day you freaked out about your money not being to him. You have not taken steps to free yourself of this.

Really think about how much turmoil you have had to deal with in 3 months not to mention the bid prior to this. This is not normal living. Sure this is a hard life, but this is more than mind games.

Think about your unpaid Bill's. What you haven't been able to do for your child. For yourself.

All for someone who does not appreciate anything you do except when he needs more financial assistance from you.

Until you are away from it, you wont see things clearly. Please go to a meeting, therapy, something. You need a fresh pair of eyes or to hear other stories.

I hope you find peace and happiness in this life.
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