Welcome to the Prison Talk Online Community! Take a Minute and Sign Up Today!






Go Back   Prison Talk > FOR FAMILY & FRIENDS > When the Relationship is Over...
Register Entertainment FAQ Calendar Mark Forums Read

When the Relationship is Over... This forum is about discussing your thoughts, feelings and issues now that you and your incarcerated (or formerly incarcerated) loved one are no longer together. (This forum is NOT for bashing - please read the rules before posting.)

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 02-02-2018, 04:30 PM
IzzyLouWho's Avatar
IzzyLouWho IzzyLouWho is offline
Mischief Makin' Moderator

Staff Superstar Winner PTO Moderator 

 

Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Illinois
Posts: 2,988
Thanks: 907
Thanked 3,081 Times in 1,517 Posts
Default We are never ever getting back together (update)

I started to sing that song to him one night. Poor MrB. He still can't believe that his addiction has cost him everything. He keeps apologizing, but that isn't going to fix anything. He knows we are divorcing. He has asked me to always be there for his daughter... That I've been more of a parent than he's ever been. He doesn't get to me like he used to. I keep reinforcing that hr left me... This was his choice...I never wanted it... All I did was everything for him and I loved him and he threw me away. I keep telling him that people aren't throw away things... And that's why I'm still here.
__________________
Angela




Reply With Quote
The Following 18 Users Say Thank You to IzzyLouWho For This Useful Post:
a.rare.love (02-04-2018), BearsLadyBear (02-02-2018), candy (02-08-2018), Chaddersgirl (02-04-2018), choclgs (02-03-2018), fbopnomore (02-02-2018), Fridyrr.Likn (02-02-2018), LeaLea (05-28-2018), liveweyerd (02-04-2018), lolo21216 (02-03-2018), maytayah (02-03-2018), miamac (02-02-2018), MizzyMuffling (02-03-2018), nimuay (02-02-2018), Revenwyn (07-02-2018), Sarianna (02-03-2018), Shelby67 (05-27-2018), sidewalker (02-03-2018)
Sponsored Links
  #2  
Old 02-02-2018, 04:38 PM
Fridyrr.Likn's Avatar
Fridyrr.Likn Fridyrr.Likn is offline
Heathen Moderator

PTO Moderator 

 

Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Casa Grande, AZ
Posts: 3,184
Thanks: 8,658
Thanked 3,983 Times in 1,742 Posts
Default

Stay strong! You know this is what's best for you!
__________________
KENDRA
Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Fridyrr.Likn For This Useful Post:
a.rare.love (02-04-2018), choclgs (02-03-2018), IzzyLouWho (02-02-2018), maytayah (02-03-2018)
  #3  
Old 02-02-2018, 04:49 PM
maytayah's Avatar
maytayah maytayah is offline
Lil British Site Moderator

Staff Superstar Winner PTO Site Moderator 

 

Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: England Uk
Posts: 7,282
Thanks: 6,843
Thanked 9,614 Times in 4,042 Posts
Default

Any separation is hard but you this is the right thing for you so you can move on.
__________________
"Do not judge me by my successes, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again." Nelson Mandela.

Who cares what they say about us? Because when I am with you I am standing with an army
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to maytayah For This Useful Post:
a.rare.love (02-04-2018), IzzyLouWho (02-02-2018)
  #4  
Old 02-02-2018, 05:21 PM
preciousjewel preciousjewel is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: United States
Posts: 265
Thanks: 88
Thanked 80 Times in 49 Posts
Default Big hugs!!!

I am sorry this is happening. We are here if you need to vent.
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to preciousjewel For This Useful Post:
a.rare.love (02-04-2018), IzzyLouWho (02-02-2018)
  #5  
Old 02-03-2018, 03:30 PM
IzzyLouWho's Avatar
IzzyLouWho IzzyLouWho is offline
Mischief Makin' Moderator

Staff Superstar Winner PTO Moderator 

 

Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Illinois
Posts: 2,988
Thanks: 907
Thanked 3,081 Times in 1,517 Posts
Default

I know this is what's best for me. Heck, he knows it, too. There are still rough days... But I'm OK.
__________________
Angela




Reply With Quote
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to IzzyLouWho For This Useful Post:
a.rare.love (02-04-2018), Critter07 (02-04-2018), fbopnomore (02-03-2018), Fridyrr.Likn (02-05-2018), Kimimi (02-03-2018), maytayah (02-03-2018), MizzyMuffling (02-04-2018), Serbgirl (02-03-2018)
  #6  
Old 02-03-2018, 07:24 PM
xolady xolady is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: May 2014
Location: highlands, florida
Posts: 5,738
Thanks: 12,223
Thanked 5,960 Times in 3,104 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by IzzyLouWho View Post
I started to sing that song to him one night. Poor MrB. He still can't believe that his addiction has cost him everything. He keeps apologizing, but that isn't going to fix anything. He knows we are divorcing. He has asked me to always be there for his daughter... That I've been more of a parent than he's ever been. He doesn't get to me like he used to. I keep reinforcing that hr left me... This was his choice...I never wanted it... All I did was everything for him and I loved him and he threw me away. I keep telling him that people aren't throw away things... And that's why I'm still here.
Not to sound like a jerk but really He threw you away, why are you still even dealing with him? I'v e had good, bad, and ugly relationships but I don't deal with people who don't respect what I do and have done for them. Honestly what if anything are you getting out of staying in contact with him after what he has done to you??? It really makes me sad to read your post I don't get why you'd let him continue to play with your emotions.
Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to xolady For This Useful Post:
a.rare.love (02-04-2018), Fridyrr.Likn (02-05-2018), joybubby (02-22-2018), liveweyerd (02-04-2018)
  #7  
Old 02-03-2018, 07:43 PM
IzzyLouWho's Avatar
IzzyLouWho IzzyLouWho is offline
Mischief Makin' Moderator

Staff Superstar Winner PTO Moderator 

 

Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Illinois
Posts: 2,988
Thanks: 907
Thanked 3,081 Times in 1,517 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by xolady View Post
Not to sound like a jerk but really He threw you away, why are you still even dealing with him? I'v e had good, bad, and ugly relationships but I don't deal with people who don't respect what I do and have done for them. Honestly what if anything are you getting out of staying in contact with him after what he has done to you??? It really makes me sad to read your post I don't get why you'd let him continue to play with your emotions.
He did throw me away... And honestly, I don't owe him a kindness... There is just something deep down inside me that keeps telling me not to turn around and throw him away like he did me. I have forgiven him and am not so bitter that I can't show some compassion. Yeah, he hurt me... But he also gave me the most amazing gift... Had he not pulled his crap, I wouldn't be with who I'm with.

My brother, boyfriend, hell... Almost everyone who knows me calls me bat shit crazy. Just chalk it up to that... I habe to be true to who I am.
__________________
Angela




Reply With Quote
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to IzzyLouWho For This Useful Post:
a.rare.love (02-04-2018), Chaddersgirl (02-04-2018), choclgs (02-03-2018), Critter07 (02-04-2018), Fridyrr.Likn (02-05-2018), joybubby (05-31-2018), MizzyMuffling (05-26-2018), nimuay (02-03-2018), Sarianna (02-04-2018), xolady (02-03-2018)
  #8  
Old 02-03-2018, 08:07 PM
xolady xolady is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: May 2014
Location: highlands, florida
Posts: 5,738
Thanks: 12,223
Thanked 5,960 Times in 3,104 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by IzzyLouWho View Post
He did throw me away... And honestly, I don't owe him a kindness... There is just something deep down inside me that keeps telling me not to turn around and throw him away like he did me. I have forgiven him and am not so bitter that I can't show some compassion. Yeah, he hurt me... But he also gave me the most amazing gift... Had he not pulled his crap, I wouldn't be with who I'm with.

My brother, boyfriend, hell... Almost everyone who knows me calls me bat shit crazy. Just chalk it up to that... I habe to be true to who I am.
I don't think your crazy at all I just wouldn't believe for a second he has any remorse or is worth my time or compassion. You have gone above and beyond for him and I get he is great when straight, believe me I've been there. No matter what you do with an addict it will never be enough and you can't ever be that dragon they are chasing. As an addict myself I know what I'm talking about. No one and nothing ever could or would stop me from getting high, except when I was finally done. I hate what my life was for years I didn't care about anything or really anyone unless they were my dealer and then I'd roll out the red carpet. It's not easy admitting this but it's a fact and if I could have gotten high nothing and no one meant shit to me. I'm not the only drug addict and I know plenty, what stopped me was my husband doing his 9th prison term and then getting out and dying of cancer. I honestly believe I'd be dead if he and I didn't agree to quit drugs when he was in county. I didn't care if I lived or died but I made him a promise to get my shit together and I did. I'm just so sorry he got sick and really never lived a drug free life, because he would have loved living where I am and he wanted this so bad, thats why I did what I did. Most people can't just walk away from drugs I fortunately am one of the luck ones who could. I hope you go to al-non meetings it might help you move on because you need to.
Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to xolady For This Useful Post:
a.rare.love (02-04-2018), liveweyerd (02-04-2018), nimuay (02-04-2018), sidewalker (02-05-2018)
  #9  
Old 02-03-2018, 08:25 PM
IzzyLouWho's Avatar
IzzyLouWho IzzyLouWho is offline
Mischief Makin' Moderator

Staff Superstar Winner PTO Moderator 

 

Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Illinois
Posts: 2,988
Thanks: 907
Thanked 3,081 Times in 1,517 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by xolady View Post
I don't think your crazy at all I just wouldn't believe for a second he has any remorse or is worth my time or compassion. You have gone above and beyond for him and I get he is great when straight, believe me I've been there. No matter what you do with an addict it will never be enough and you can't ever be that dragon they are chasing. As an addict myself I know what I'm talking about. No one and nothing ever could or would stop me from getting high, except when I was finally done. I hate what my life was for years I didn't care about anything or really anyone unless they were my dealer and then I'd roll out the red carpet. It's not easy admitting this but it's a fact and if I could have gotten high nothing and no one meant shit to me. I'm not the only drug addict and I know plenty, what stopped me was my husband doing his 9th prison term and then getting out and dying of cancer. I honestly believe I'd be dead if he and I didn't agree to quit drugs when he was in county. I didn't care if I lived or died but I made him a promise to get my shit together and I did. I'm just so sorry he got sick and really never lived a drug free life, because he would have loved living where I am and he wanted this so bad, thats why I did what I did. Most people can't just walk away from drugs I fortunately am one of the luck ones who could. I hope you go to al-non meetings it might help you move on because you need to.
There's nothing left there... I'm not hoping for anything. I'm being a friend. He knows not to ask for anything, cause that is a no. It's a phone call a week.
__________________
Angela




Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to IzzyLouWho For This Useful Post:
Fridyrr.Likn (02-08-2018), Sarianna (02-04-2018), sidewalker (02-05-2018), xolady (02-04-2018)
  #10  
Old 02-04-2018, 01:03 PM
Fredslady5 Fredslady5 is offline
Account Closed
 

Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Illinois
Posts: 168
Thanks: 0
Thanked 137 Times in 72 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by xolady View Post
Not to sound like a jerk but really He threw you away, why are you still even dealing with him? I'v e had good, bad, and ugly relationships but I don't deal with people who don't respect what I do and have done for them. Honestly what if anything are you getting out of staying in contact with him after what he has done to you??? It really makes me sad to read your post I don't get why you'd let him continue to play with your emotions.
IKR... sometimes the hardest thing to so is let go, but if he ain't respecting you or treating you like trash.. then bye boo...
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 02-04-2018, 06:53 PM
a.rare.love's Avatar
a.rare.love a.rare.love is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: California
Posts: 1,157
Thanks: 5,155
Thanked 724 Times in 514 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by xolady View Post
I don't think your crazy at all I just wouldn't believe for a second he has any remorse or is worth my time or compassion. You have gone above and beyond for him and I get he is great when straight, believe me I've been there. No matter what you do with an addict it will never be enough and you can't ever be that dragon they are chasing. As an addict myself I know what I'm talking about. No one and nothing ever could or would stop me from getting high, except when I was finally done. I hate what my life was for years I didn't care about anything or really anyone unless they were my dealer and then I'd roll out the red carpet. It's not easy admitting this but it's a fact and if I could have gotten high nothing and no one meant shit to me. I'm not the only drug addict and I know plenty, what stopped me was my husband doing his 9th prison term and then getting out and dying of cancer. I honestly believe I'd be dead if he and I didn't agree to quit drugs when he was in county. I didn't care if I lived or died but I made him a promise to get my shit together and I did. I'm just so sorry he got sick and really never lived a drug free life, because he would have loved living where I am and he wanted this so bad, thats why I did what I did. Most people can't just walk away from drugs I fortunately am one of the luck ones who could. I hope you go to al-non meetings it might help you move on because you need to.



This part i had to underscore in orange/blue. I am so happy you're still going strong, chica and you are clean. RIP to your LOhugs and blessings XO LADY. #staystrong #focus proud of you."
__________________
#TAAS (there are always signs,so DON'T ignore them)
Lead with your MIND + not your heart.
CONSISTENCY,communication"is key.Without action, it just isn't real.


Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 02-04-2018, 06:56 PM
a.rare.love's Avatar
a.rare.love a.rare.love is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: California
Posts: 1,157
Thanks: 5,155
Thanked 724 Times in 514 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by IzzyLouWho View Post
I started to sing that song to him one night. Poor MrB. He still can't believe that his addiction has cost him everything. He keeps apologizing, but that isn't going to fix anything. He knows we are divorcing. He has asked me to always be there for his daughter... That I've been more of a parent than he's ever been. He doesn't get to me like he used to. I keep reinforcing that hr left me... This was his choice...I never wanted it... All I did was everything for him and I loved him and he threw me away. I keep telling him that people aren't throw away things... And that's why I'm still here.


yep. chica, and that's what you're going to have to keep remembering' you did not clearly want any of this, he had made his choice to undermine your love and the foundation of what your relationship was supposedly built on, he ruined it. and i hope you're going to keep on moving forward. You and your daughter are better off IF you're truly moving on/not looking back, and you're a better person for it too...I truly believe that. hugs and blessings tonight 4 u izzy. Adios.G-night.
__________________
#TAAS (there are always signs,so DON'T ignore them)
Lead with your MIND + not your heart.
CONSISTENCY,communication"is key.Without action, it just isn't real.


Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to a.rare.love For This Useful Post:
Fridyrr.Likn (02-08-2018), missingdee (02-05-2018)
  #13  
Old 05-26-2018, 09:33 PM
Maya2007's Avatar
Maya2007 Maya2007 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Nunya
Posts: 677
Thanks: 1,097
Thanked 279 Times in 208 Posts
Default

He is doing you a favor.... there are many fish in the sea.
__________________
ASL is BEAUTIFUL!!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Hello PTO - I'm back w/ an update JasonsLady2018 PTO Lounge 7 09-16-2009 10:18 AM
Update....he's back at the FCI Csmcgrl23 Federal General Prison Talk, Introductions & Chit Chat 7 06-30-2006 02:50 PM
Guess Whos Back... Back Again..(update) KTC PTO Lounge 11 01-05-2004 06:37 AM


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:27 AM.
Copyright © 2001- 2017 Prison Talk Online
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Website Design & Custom vBulletin Skins by: Relivo Media
Message Board Statistics