Welcome to the Prison Talk Online Community! Take a Minute and Sign Up Today!






Go Back   Prison Talk > RESOURCE CENTER > The War on Drugs - and the results of it
Register Entertainment FAQ Calendar Mark Forums Read

The War on Drugs - and the results of it A war against drugs, or against families?

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #26  
Old 09-04-2007, 05:55 PM
suzeg3's Avatar
suzeg3 suzeg3 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 3,391
Thanks: 238
Thanked 200 Times in 130 Posts
Default

chico;s good for you, this is a nasty difficult addiction, I am always happy to see people "get it" before they have hit rock bottom.
__________________









Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #27  
Old 05-27-2008, 09:28 AM
jlee13 jlee13 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: May 2008
Location: SC USA
Posts: 4
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by myverybad View Post
The thing about drugs and booze is that its like a safety blanket for those whom arn't so strong or smart to find another way around their problems or maybe the problem is just too hard to deal with. They are in jail because they lost sight of what was important to them. All we can do is support them as best we can without solving their problems for them as that is something they have to do or they will never truely beat their addiction. I am tellin you from experience. Jail didn't solve my drug problem, it only made it ten times worse. I learnt so much in jail, just as rehab and all the other so called help agencies. The truth is that if we got to the problem and solved it before it got to jail then repeat offenders and 'falling off the wagon' wouldn't be an issue. Humans have an addictive nature they just need to realise that and control it. No addict will give up unless they themselves want to and have the right support to do so. good luck!

The last thing you said is more true than any of us want to believe or accept. I dont really believe in support anymore. Unless they want it ..... they wont change. We all "loveones" mostly just ENABLE! Unless the addict wants it, the nightmare never goes away! i dont care what anyone says, its not a popular thought only because its truth and the hardest to accept. A mothers love will kill an addict. a girlfriends love will prolong addiction. its the truth and the best thing that we can do for our lover is accept that and stop trying solutions and problems solve for them. God!!! it makes me so mad, because i can pour everything that is within good true pure loving into an addict and that does change them a degree. you can pour into an addict and it doesnt change them. it doesnt! believe a lie if you want to, keep telling yourself that and putting up with all the crap that they throw into your life. But all you are doing is hurting yourself, salt in your own wound and wasting precious time that you will never get back on someone who will steal lie and bleed your heart for a crack rock. Dont we think more of ourselves? or are we that weak. Dont get me wrong i love my addict in jail just as you love your addict and not an ounce less, but i cant live knowing that i prolonged his condition a day, an hour, a minute. Secondly, i dont get my precious time back that i wasted cut open and bleeding so he could hit a crack rock. I hope this has made an impression to inspire you to move on for youself, your a victim!!! Dont stay in a gutter when you deserve a mountain top. They are heavy and less than men, they are worthless to you in this condition. worthless to your life and hopes and dreams they are a weight! probally they might turn sooner and faster without you. i hope to God that the sting of me leaving my addict in jail, is a sting he will never forget. I want my life back and i am taking it. I am tired of waiting on him to hit bottom, becuase i have hit bottom in us.
Reply With Quote
  #28  
Old 05-27-2008, 02:06 PM
maria3lynn's Avatar
maria3lynn maria3lynn is offline
Justin~Dylan~Damian
 

Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: daytona beach,florida
Posts: 240
Thanks: 0
Thanked 117 Times in 61 Posts
Default

This is a really tough subject to deal with.... I believed my husband during the 1st 2 years he did in prison and I stood by him even after he smoked my house, my credit, my kids futures, etc. away in a glass pipe, he said he was done, never going back , was so sorry, ashamed of himself, would spend the rest of his life making it up to us. He got out and it wasnt long before he started lying again, went to prison again for 6 months got out and the same old $h*t. I felt extremely betrayed and now I wont give him the time of day, he is walking the streets, sleeping in the woods and blaming everyone else for what continues to him..............You cant do anything enough to "help" its a waste of time unless they do it on their own....Good Luck
__________________
  • Maria-Lynn Kwiatkowski





Reply With Quote
  #29  
Old 05-29-2008, 10:10 AM
boflipflops36's Avatar
boflipflops36 boflipflops36 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Decatur, Al
Posts: 3,962
Thanks: 8,069
Thanked 4,123 Times in 1,529 Posts
Default

A Mothers Love Will Kill A Addict!! A Addict Will Kill a Mother! I see this in my daughter as her son is doing drugs and been in trouble. He is Killing her, Emotional, physical.
How do you turn them lose? I wish 25 yrs ago my Dad could have turned my brother lose and my Mom 12 yrs ago. Its not easy but like you said-THEY have to want it For their SELF. You have to say self I do not want to Live like this anymore and mean it. You have to be tired of all the problems you cause your self and the ones you love.
Love-big word here. "Love thy self "with all thy soul and heart!! But some people have a addicton gene and its hard, but it can be done. You can chose to woller with pigs or get out of the mud clean your self up. IF they want it! Another word "IF"

Last edited by boflipflops36; 05-29-2008 at 10:14 AM..
Reply With Quote
  #30  
Old 05-31-2008, 02:30 PM
jlee13 jlee13 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: May 2008
Location: SC USA
Posts: 4
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default co dependants die before the addict!! STRESS HELLLLO!

Quote:
Originally Posted by boflipflops36 View Post
A Mothers Love Will Kill A Addict!! A Addict Will Kill a Mother! I see this in my daughter as her son is doing drugs and been in trouble. He is Killing her, Emotional, physical.
How do you turn them lose? I wish 25 yrs ago my Dad could have turned my brother lose and my Mom 12 yrs ago. Its not easy but like you said-THEY have to want it For their SELF. You have to say self I do not want to Live like this anymore and mean it. You have to be tired of all the problems you cause your self and the ones you love.
Love-big word here. "Love thy self "with all thy soul and heart!! But some people have a addicton gene and its hard, but it can be done. You can chose to woller with pigs or get out of the mud clean your self up. IF they want it! Another word "IF"

that is a great point too.... they say that a co dependant will die before the addict. Its like you have a window of oppurtunity before anyone dies to CUT THEM Loose. My cousin was an addict, and she said it wasnt the rape and prostitution that made her hit bottum, its when her mom and dad stopped answering her calls. i dont understand why it is not so clear to parents, yes its hard... but your child life is at stake! What the crap are you waiting on... tons of recovered addicts lives on the streets! ... my cousin told me that the best thing for my friend was to let him get his fill and be in survival mode.. where is my next hit, where is my next meal, when can i take my next shower..... i believe those are the thoughts that make someone WANT to change... she said he will get tierd of it faster than he thinks he will.. and i am trying to do that for him, put the parents are digging his grave!!!!! and there are in denial!! intentionally!!! they answer his calls, give him money... GOd when will they stop before it kills him and then they blame me... for the jail and the DAs case against him, but it doesnt do him any favors to let them get of easy! thats the problem... its not even love they are giving him.. becase true love, real love disciplines! real talk!
Reply With Quote
  #31  
Old 09-14-2008, 06:09 AM
KarenTx's Avatar
KarenTx KarenTx is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Texas Smith
Posts: 553
Thanks: 62
Thanked 239 Times in 101 Posts
Default Heartbreaking

Loving about an addict is one of the most frustrating, heartbreaking things a person can live through . It's very confusing because on one hand it is a disease and when a loved one has a disease you feel obligated to do things for them but that is the worst possible thing you can do with an addict. I lost more things than I can even bear to talk about in behind my son's father, his addiction and how I enabled him. The last part of that last sentence is something that took me years to figure out and accept. A large part of the problem of how I was having to live with him and his addiction was my fault. That made me real pissed the first time an Al Anon member said that to me ..I was like wtf??? I had done EVERYTHING to HELP and now your saying it's my fault??? The truth is if you are living in deplorable physicaly and or mentaly unhealthy conditions to be with someone with a horrible habit you really need to do some self examining and find out why you would allow yourself to be put through these things so you can make sure it never happens again. Sorry this is so long but I went through hell to figure these things out.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to KarenTx For This Useful Post:
SOULMATES0406 (09-14-2008)
  #32  
Old 09-14-2008, 08:44 AM
missingmybaby1 missingmybaby1 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: West Texas
Posts: 837
Thanks: 640
Thanked 288 Times in 243 Posts
Default

Thanks for sharing : )
__________________
Don't Tell your God How Big Your Storm Is Tell your Storm How Big Your God Is



Reply With Quote
  #33  
Old 09-14-2008, 07:50 PM
SOULMATES0406 SOULMATES0406 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: CaLi
Posts: 1,538
Thanks: 625
Thanked 1,089 Times in 515 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by KarenTx View Post
Loving about an addict is one of the most frustrating, heartbreaking things a person can live through . It's very confusing because on one hand it is a disease and when a loved one has a disease you feel obligated to do things for them but that is the worst possible thing you can do with an addict. I lost more things than I can even bear to talk about in behind my son's father, his addiction and how I enabled him. The last part of that last sentence is something that took me years to figure out and accept. A large part of the problem of how I was having to live with him and his addiction was my fault. That made me real pissed the first time an Al Anon member said that to me ..I was like wtf??? I had done EVERYTHING to HELP and now your saying it's my fault??? The truth is if you are living in deplorable physicaly and or mentaly unhealthy conditions to be with someone with a horrible habit you really need to do some self examining and find out why you would allow yourself to be put through these things so you can make sure it never happens again. Sorry this is so long but I went through hell to figure these things out.

You may make ur story longer...i really find this MOTIVATING...thanks
Reply With Quote
  #34  
Old 11-19-2008, 07:48 AM
dianna4444 dianna4444 is offline
dianna4444
 

Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: arizona usa
Posts: 80
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

http://www.fedcure.org/information/F...rWriting.shtml write sentencing commission to help our loved ones come home sooner from federal prisons, this is a bill that needs to be passed offers, less time and possibility of parole, we are stronger in numbers thanks
Reply With Quote
  #35  
Old 04-26-2009, 03:51 PM
wilsgirl wilsgirl is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 8
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

I've been trying to support my ex. For the last three years he's revocated parole and relapsed. For anyone in the Ft. Worth, TX area, he just can't stay out of Poly. He's started hustling women and god knows what else. I sat down with him and told him that i would support him thru his recovery. For three years it's the same story. Right now he's on the run. He constantly lies. I can't stand to see him when he's going thru stomach cramps and sweating.
Reply With Quote
  #36  
Old 05-08-2009, 09:28 AM
saborami saborami is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: california
Posts: 25
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default herion

my husband is addicted to herion. and i know that he uses inside. he's gotten his head crack open. i want to know how much money it takes to live inside. i never know if he is using or not.
Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R. Davis View Post
Ok, here we go! What are we all here for? Is it that we all have someone dear and near to us who are in prison for drug/alcohol abuse/ Yep, I think so.
I don't care if you are into Bud Lights or Crack, I don't care if your loved one is into that or more. What should this tell us all? Something is wrong! Our loved ones are in jail or in prison. What do we do now? What do we do to help our loved ones? You all tell me! Give me something to work on. Tell me what you think. Tell me your feelings. Tell me your problems. Tell me what you want to tell others. Lets get all of this out into the open.
Lets work together one this and share our information.

God Bless you all.

JR
Reply With Quote
  #37  
Old 05-10-2009, 02:56 AM
Biddle'sWifey Biddle'sWifey is offline
....
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: delete my profile!
Posts: 13
Thanks: 0
Thanked 6 Times in 2 Posts
Default

my bf says he doesnt have a prob. what do u say to that?
Reply With Quote
  #38  
Old 05-10-2009, 11:35 PM
ivecnub4's Avatar
ivecnub4 ivecnub4 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: ca. usa
Posts: 111
Thanks: 30
Thanked 50 Times in 25 Posts
Default

yeah they all say they dont have a problem i said that for 10 years untill i finally steped up to the plate and took a look at who i really was, and who i really wasnt. i had to decide start living, or start dieing. i was addicted to smoking meth, i dont think there is anything as hard to quit as that. its been over 2 years now and i thank GOD everyday for my sobriety.
Reply With Quote
  #39  
Old 05-15-2009, 10:29 PM
wendyann12 wendyann12 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: omaha,nebraska united states
Posts: 25
Thanks: 2
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R. Davis View Post
Ok, here we go! What are we all here for? Is it that we all have someone dear and near to us who are in prison for drug/alcohol abuse/ Yep, I think so.
I don't care if you are into Bud Lights or Crack, I don't care if your loved one is into that or more. What should this tell us all? Something is wrong! Our loved ones are in jail or in prison. What do we do now? What do we do to help our loved ones? You all tell me! Give me something to work on. Tell me what you think. Tell me your feelings. Tell me your problems. Tell me what you want to tell others. Lets get all of this out into the open.
Lets work together one this and share our information.

God Bless you all.

JR
i'll send you what i learn in the next few month's iam doing my theisis on the drug laws. My husband was sick he's and addict and their taking his whole life well tweleve years for that
Reply With Quote
  #40  
Old 05-15-2009, 10:32 PM
wendyann12 wendyann12 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: omaha,nebraska united states
Posts: 25
Thanks: 2
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveMoff View Post
Sometimes, about all you can do is live your own life and wait for the other person to "get it". If he or she does not, sometimes it's best to move on. Don't ever think you can "fix" an addiction or that you're responsible for it. No one who is truly determined to get and stay sober should need any "conditions" (someone's behavior to change, someone to come back home, etc. etc.) to do it.

It's a disease, folks, and since it's not contagious, we don't give it to others.
if i send a tea bag who all should i send them to my husband is a federal prisoneer and i think i should just send on to each of them
Reply With Quote
  #41  
Old 05-15-2009, 10:37 PM
wendyann12 wendyann12 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: omaha,nebraska united states
Posts: 25
Thanks: 2
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by mystictigger View Post
My husband says he is done, when he comes home he wants nothing to do with all the old people (who hopefully know they better not call or come by my house) the life style. My fear is, and granted I know that things are available inside, I make the choice every morning not to use but that choice has been made for him. I am behind him and support him all the way, there is just that little voice in the back of my head, asking.......
don't make the same mistsake i did move if you really love him don't let him get around the same people my husband came home only to go back for tweleve he'll be fifty when he comes home i still have to wait five years
Reply With Quote
  #42  
Old 05-15-2009, 10:39 PM
wendyann12 wendyann12 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: omaha,nebraska united states
Posts: 25
Thanks: 2
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

i think the war is against the families every way we turn if you love him get moved away so he has a safe place to come to
Reply With Quote
  #43  
Old 05-15-2009, 10:41 PM
wendyann12 wendyann12 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: omaha,nebraska united states
Posts: 25
Thanks: 2
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SOULMATES0406 View Post
You may make ur story longer...i really find this MOTIVATING...thanks
thank you your story helped me
Reply With Quote
  #44  
Old 05-15-2009, 10:47 PM
wendyann12 wendyann12 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: omaha,nebraska united states
Posts: 25
Thanks: 2
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by mrskym View Post
We need to step up and let our voice be heard. We need not to sit back and let the goverment lock up majorty of our men because of this factor . these men are getting more time then the murder's and the terroist...
child molesters are getting probation and fathers with addictions are getting 10 to life
Reply With Quote
  #45  
Old 05-15-2009, 10:50 PM
wendyann12 wendyann12 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: omaha,nebraska united states
Posts: 25
Thanks: 2
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by zoezoe View Post
Thats why places like this and other boards are a good support system. I don't do well in groups but I can express myself in writing with no problem. I know only my closest friend and some family members know about my ABF and the problems it causes. These boards are a great place to vent and not feel like anyone is judging you. Everyone here has problems and sometimes its just nice to hear a "been there done that and I survived".
i can't believe how much better i feel today after finding this site i wish i would have found it last time he was in things would have been different
Reply With Quote
  #46  
Old 05-15-2009, 10:55 PM
wendyann12 wendyann12 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: omaha,nebraska united states
Posts: 25
Thanks: 2
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ChicosgrrlinCO View Post
Thank you so very much I should also mention that my step-dad has developed a binge drinking habit in recent years. I often worry about my mother's well being. Now that I'm attending AA and Al-Alon, I see the alcoholic world in a clear light. I need to learn not to deal with life's difficulties through alcohol.
thanks to everyone after reading all these post i think i need to go to alnon
Reply With Quote
  #47  
Old 05-16-2009, 06:59 AM
ryansheart's Avatar
ryansheart ryansheart is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: mo. usa
Posts: 46
Thanks: 9
Thanked 14 Times in 10 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by gatitab View Post
my husband is addicted to herion. and i know that he uses inside. he's gotten his head crack open. i want to know how much money it takes to live inside. i never know if he is using or not.
My guys family sends 100 a month and that buys everything he needs and if he runs out before the end of the month thats to bad! good luck to you!
__________________
To the world you maybe only one person. But to one person you maybe the world!
Reply With Quote
  #48  
Old 05-16-2009, 07:48 AM
ryansheart's Avatar
ryansheart ryansheart is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: mo. usa
Posts: 46
Thanks: 9
Thanked 14 Times in 10 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by wendyann12 View Post
child molesters are getting probation and fathers with addictions are getting 10 to life
this is so true my guy is down for his first time and by the grace of god he never hurt anyone and he isn't violent! if he had hurt anyone I say that he where he should be! My point is that they should offer these guys some kinda of treatment before they send them to prison.We have three kids and a house and I'm doing all I can to keep everything together THANK GOD FOR OUR FAMILIES!!! I've had family and friends that went through prison treatment what a joke! It wasn't until they came home and went through treatment that they became clean! I think the system is really broken!
__________________
To the world you maybe only one person. But to one person you maybe the world!
Reply With Quote
  #49  
Old 06-22-2009, 11:32 PM
Tommy2tone Tommy2tone is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: May 2009
Location: Laguna CA
Posts: 44
Thanks: 3
Thanked 22 Times in 14 Posts
Default

You can talk to someone all day but until there ready it's frustrating.Sometimes it takes almost dieing or some tragedy.the hardest thing was changing my thinking,I never want to go back to that hell.The first year is hard,give lots of support and love it takes everything we can musterup.I love my life now and will do anything I can to help anyone who is in that hell.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Tommy2tone For This Useful Post:
humboldtsweetie (10-07-2009)
  #50  
Old 10-07-2009, 11:47 PM
humboldtsweetie's Avatar
humboldtsweetie humboldtsweetie is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: California United States
Posts: 1,380
Thanks: 316
Thanked 418 Times in 300 Posts
Default

anyone else feel afraid that maybe it just won't get better? i think sometimes i fear that more than cheating. just a little rant I guess. I have faith and trust him and everything completely but i think just the situations i have seen him in make it something that will always be in the back of my mind.
__________________
My love is finally home in my arms as of 6-18-2010! And we couldn't be doing better

Photo Tinks by WiddlyTinks.com
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Loved ones at Holman? michelewifff1l Alabama Prison and Jail Specific Discussions 34 09-01-2007 09:47 AM
Anyone have a loved one at St. Marys BryantsBabygirl West Virginia Prison and Jail Specific Discussions 7 10-10-2006 06:50 AM
Expecting while the loved one is gone........... QueenBizzle Raising Children with Parents in Prison 20 07-22-2006 04:23 PM
C yard.. does anyone have there loved ones in this yard Juansgirl North Kern State Prison (NKSP) - California 3 06-30-2006 12:44 AM


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 12:22 PM.
Copyright © 2001- 2017 Prison Talk Online
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Website Design & Custom vBulletin Skins by: Relivo Media
Message Board Statistics