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Prison & Jail Wedding Information Central Everything about getting married in prison or jail. Notices, pictures, questions, stories, what to expect.

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  #101  
Old 09-01-2005, 06:23 PM
babygirl350 babygirl350 is offline
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mrschris

You will be just fine. Sure there will be some depression, that is natural to spend your wedding night alone without your husband. However, you can do it just as many of us have. I did it four years ago and have never regretted it.

Stay strong and enjoy your special day as much as you can under the circumstances.

We are all here for you, always know that.
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  #102  
Old 09-14-2005, 12:26 PM
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Default wedding blues

I am getting married to my girl next week. She is ni Texas so our wedding is by proxy and I won't even get to see her on our wedding day. That does suck but I love her so much and couldn't imagine life without her. I know there will be highs and plenty of lows but I would choose her all over again!

sroloff
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  #103  
Old 09-18-2005, 02:54 PM
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sro Congrads To You Both And Many Years Of Happiness I Did The Proxy Marriage In Texas Also The Jp That Did The Ceremony Was Awesome I Didnt Get To Visit My Husband Either After The Marriage But The Prison Did Give Me That Call Which Was Right On Time I Live In Chicago Now Hes Up For Parole Which Might Mean Anywhere From Nov- Jan And God Willing He May Be Home Here With Me I Am Right There With You If I Had To Do It All Over Again I Would Still Choose Him I Have Learnt To Appreciate All The So Called Little Things In Life So Many Take For Granted Just To Ba Able To Touch His Hand What A Blessing That Will Be Yes There Are High Days And Lowww Days But Each Day That Passes Only Brings Us Closer To The Ones We Love Take Care Congrads To You And Yours God Bless!
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  #104  
Old 09-18-2005, 02:54 PM
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soly Thank You For The Congrads
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  #105  
Old 09-18-2005, 02:57 PM
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mrs C You Will Problay Cry As Much As You Are Right Now But Happy Tears Of Finally Being The Mrs You Want And Desire To Be Keep God In Your Marriage And Congrads On Your Upcoming
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  #106  
Old 09-18-2005, 11:39 PM
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I am EXTREMELY new to this site and have no idea where to even begin. I am not even sure if I am writing this message in the write spot. I found this site and hoped it would help me get into contact with other young women like me going through the same situations. A support group if you will , as I am sure you know that most of the time when someone hears your man is in prison they are not so eager to talk to you anymore.
ANyway, I will see what kind of response I get...

Keep on keeping on !!!!!
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  #107  
Old 09-19-2005, 07:14 AM
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I just recently got married a week today .. and the "high" of it all ... is now coming down to a crash.. and burn.. i am lonely and sadder than i have ever felt!!!!!!!!
I am so in love.. and happy .. but now empty? make sense.. i am hoping this passes quickly at least i have places like pto to vent.... and share what i am going through.. it can feel so overwhelming and confusing..

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  #108  
Old 09-20-2005, 09:59 AM
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Thumbs up Thank you.

I just wanted to thank you for that. I'm new to this whole thing, and I was kinda nervous and a little scared, but your post really helped.

I've been with my fiance for almost 2 years know. I met him while he was on parole, and we dated for about a year, and then seperated for 2 months. Well, in that 2 months he lost control and started doing drugs, and it got in some more trouble. He originally served 5 years of an 8 sentence, and now he's been in for a year. We got engaged before he went back, and I was thinking about just putting the whole thing off until he comes home.

My family has been really supportive for the most part, my mom just loves him to death, inspite of his shortcomings, I'm really lucky on that part. She even volunteered to be his proxy at the ceremony. My siblings are critical, but overall, they love me and trust me to make the right decision. I went to visit him on Saturday, and we talked about going ahead and getting married. I guess I thought I was too good or something at first. But I thought about it for a while, and I decided to go ahead. I love him more than anything, and I'm so happy, and so proud that I'm going to be his wife. At first I thought I was just a wierdo or something, but I feel a lot better now, like it's ok to be happy. I've never been so sure of anything in my entire life.

But I guess I would like some advice on something. He told me I didn't have to tell anyone, that we could keep it between us. My mom already knows, and so do my sisters-cause well, that's who you tell when you're getting married. But I guess I just don't want to tell the rest of my family until he comes home and we can have a real wedding. I mean, a couple of them would be pretty ok with it, but theres part of my family that are just jerks. They're real uptight and high-strung. It's not because I'm embarrassed of him, I just want him to have a fair chance. I'm afraid they'll judge him on the sins of his past, instead of his character, and he doesn't deserve that. I don't care if they know, I just want them to meet him first, and get to know him without passing judgement.

Does any of this make sense, or should I just not care and tell everyone?
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  #109  
Old 09-20-2005, 12:50 PM
babygirl350 babygirl350 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by texaswoman832
I just wanted to thank you for that. I'm new to this whole thing, and I was kinda nervous and a little scared, but your post really helped.

I've been with my fiance for almost 2 years know. I met him while he was on parole, and we dated for about a year, and then seperated for 2 months. Well, in that 2 months he lost control and started doing drugs, and it got in some more trouble. He originally served 5 years of an 8 sentence, and now he's been in for a year. We got engaged before he went back, and I was thinking about just putting the whole thing off until he comes home.

My family has been really supportive for the most part, my mom just loves him to death, inspite of his shortcomings, I'm really lucky on that part. She even volunteered to be his proxy at the ceremony. My siblings are critical, but overall, they love me and trust me to make the right decision. I went to visit him on Saturday, and we talked about going ahead and getting married. I guess I thought I was too good or something at first. But I thought about it for a while, and I decided to go ahead. I love him more than anything, and I'm so happy, and so proud that I'm going to be his wife. At first I thought I was just a wierdo or something, but I feel a lot better now, like it's ok to be happy. I've never been so sure of anything in my entire life.

But I guess I would like some advice on something. He told me I didn't have to tell anyone, that we could keep it between us. My mom already knows, and so do my sisters-cause well, that's who you tell when you're getting married. But I guess I just don't want to tell the rest of my family until he comes home and we can have a real wedding. I mean, a couple of them would be pretty ok with it, but theres part of my family that are just jerks. They're real uptight and high-strung. It's not because I'm embarrassed of him, I just want him to have a fair chance. I'm afraid they'll judge him on the sins of his past, instead of his character, and he doesn't deserve that. I don't care if they know, I just want them to meet him first, and get to know him without passing judgement.

Does any of this make sense, or should I just not care and tell everyone?
I can only share what I did for my wedding announcement, or I should say non announcement.

I have very little family alive, however, for the most part, I knew there would be problems, so I chose only to tell one family member and she was my witness at the wedding.

That was over four years ago and I haven't regretted it since.

I feel like you do, I want people to judge him on his own merits when he is released. I want them to see how he treats me and how he conducts his life in the free world.

I am not ashamed of him in any way, shape or form, however, society as a whole has a negative attitude toward inmates and my family are no exception.

His family however are all aware that he is married and his parents were able to be a part of the ceremony. They couldn't be happier.

I think you have got to do what the two of you feel is in your best interest.

I wish you all the best and glad you found PTO.
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  #110  
Old 09-20-2005, 01:17 PM
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Thanx 2 all of u who are sharing, i'm getting married soon too, and am pretty nervous, but also super excited! It's good to know none of us are crazy for going through the things we go through....the things that are done for love huh?
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  #111  
Old 09-20-2005, 01:36 PM
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Thanks!

I would just much rather keep it private. I feel like it's his information to share, and it really doesn't mean anything. He's not a bad guy, he's not violent, and he would never hurt me. I feel like people assume the worst when they find out, like they assume he's some drunk or drug addict who's gonna hurt me, phisically and emotionally, and that's just not the case. He was young and made some mistakes, and he's paying for them. It really hurts to think people would treat him differently, or not give him a chance because of his past. But I know my family, and the ones who don't know already, wouldn't be ok with it. I know what a great person he is, and that they would all love him to pieces, but if they knew, they wouldn't even give him a chance.

He said it was up to me, and that he didn't care either way. That he wouldn't be upset if I didn't tell anyone until after we had a proper wedding, and after reading these posts, I think that's what I'm going to do. I guess I just thought it would make me seem ashamed of him, and I don't want it to come across like that. I guess I should stop worrying about what other people think.

Thanks for the reply, this is my first day on this, and I already feel so much better.
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  #112  
Old 09-20-2005, 04:28 PM
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congrads And Many Years Of Happiness To You All Who Have Or Is About To Get Married When A Person Can Truly Love Unconditionally Then You Know Its Real God Bless And Have A Good Day Do Whatever Your Heart Feels And Dont Worry About What Anyone Thinks Live Your Life For You Just Think Of All The Problems We Would Have If We Let Others Live For Us
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  #113  
Old 10-18-2005, 09:13 AM
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this is something that has been on my mind ever since we've been talking about marriage.could I deal with a lonely wedding night? I think so. thanks for sharing...
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  #114  
Old 10-18-2005, 09:32 AM
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I just wanted to thank you guys again, and give you an update. I've got all the paper work taken care of, and am all set to get married. I'm really excited about it. My fiance was moved to Dawson in Dallas, and we finally got a contact visit, after not being able to touch each other for over a year. The last time I was able to kiss him was at his parents, on 4th of July in '04. I was so happy, and it just reaffirmed everything.

Thanks again, it's nice to be able to read what you guys have to say, it makes me feel more sane, and less alone.
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  #115  
Old 10-24-2005, 05:02 PM
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Can someone please help me out me and my fiancee are trying to get married. He is currently incarcerated in Lee County in Bishopville if someone has any ideals please help me thanx
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  #116  
Old 10-24-2005, 05:10 PM
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My boyfriend and I are trying to get married. He is currently incarcerated in Lee County, Bishopville is there a way for us to get married in South Carolina? If so, can someone please help me out.
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  #117  
Old 10-24-2005, 08:27 PM
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Thanks for letting me know what to expect, my fiance and I have been thinking about it, and then getting remarried when he got out. I still am going to think about it since he is now on an 11 month defer, i think i can wait.
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  #118  
Old 10-25-2005, 07:02 AM
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Wait if you can because it can be costly. Save the money for the big one!
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  #119  
Old 10-25-2005, 09:35 AM
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texas Woman Congrads To You Both Im Happy For You God Bless And Many Years Of Love And Happiness Always Keep God In Your Marriage And Life And For All Of Those Interested Theres A Petition For Conjugal Visits For All The Us Prisons Under Petition On The Main Page Here At Pto Check It Out Cause I Sure Could Use One Of Them Right About Now Lol And Since Texas Is Not A State That Allows That Maybe One Day Soon They Will,,,,, Keep The Faith And Congrads To All Those Married And Or Getting Married,,,,, T Check Out Under The States On Main Pto Page South Carolina There You May Find What Your Looking For
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  #120  
Old 10-25-2005, 08:31 PM
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now to say what i came here to say....i've been with my man nine yrs and we got married in may.....for me it was a mixture of joy and sadness!!!!!! its a confliction.....its sad that i come home day and day out and my husband is not there!!!! i can't touch him...i can't see him...i can't talk to him!!!! its not an easy thing weather your married or not!!!!!! but the fact is that i love him and he's worth it!!!!!

Last edited by Valentine4ever; 10-25-2005 at 09:05 PM..
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  #121  
Old 10-25-2005, 08:48 PM
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cmhurd I agree with you...i don't regret it one bit.. I would love to have him home with me, who wouldn't. I just think it's sad that people have to come on here and make other people feel like shit, everyone has their opinion but should probably keep it to themselves I personally love all the support I get from everyone on here...
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  #122  
Old 10-27-2005, 01:06 AM
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Okay, folks...let's keep it cool and keep it calm here. Let's have a refresher of the PTO policies:

Quote:
• PTO Community Purpose:
The purpose of the Prison Talk Online community is Prisoner & Family Support, Information and Assistance. While we welcome people with other view points seeking to learn more, anything beyond friendly questions will NOT be tolerated. PTO is not a forum open to debating whether or not anyone should be in prison, should prisoners and their families have rights, etc. Anyone who is hostile to our purpose will be immediately blocked from the community and all of their posts will be deleted. This will be the ONLY WARNING and no notice will be given.

• “Freedom of Speech”:
While we believe very much in the freedom of speech & expression, you DO NOT have an absolute right to say whatever you want in this community. Anything that goes against our core beliefs and the purpose for which this community was designed may not be allowed. Posts and comments that are meant to incite conflicts between members or outside parties are strictly prohibited. PTO Administration has the absolute right to edit, modify, close or delete any content found in this community. While this rarely, if ever happens, we will not tolerate individuals or groups creating problems with the overall membership.
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Now...let's get back to the main topic of this thread.
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  #123  
Old 10-27-2005, 09:27 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by InLuvWithD
cmhurd I agree with you...i don't regret it one bit.. I would love to have him home with me, who wouldn't. I just think it's sad that people have to come on here and make other people feel like shit, everyone has their opinion but should probably keep it to themselves I personally love all the support I get from everyone on here...

Hi,

How can I become a member of the 2009 club, that is my fiancee' ERD. I see that a lot on the boards and I think it is awesome to acknowledge when your man is coming home. I am sitting here reading these wonderful letters trying to keep from crying. I want so bad to marry my finacee', but he is adament about waiting, he doesn't want the memories of a prison wedding. We are officially getting engaged the first of the year and sending out anouncements. I am scared because so far its just been me him, my best friend and a few other people. But his whole family will know in January, and his family all but his mother does not think we should be together. We have been together for 3yrs and its still strong.

So I applaud all the women who are engaged or are married. I smile for you and inside smile for me. PTO is very therapuetic. To be honest, I started up to bed to get some sleep because I have been on here 'til the early morning hours since I discovered it. I've never seen this mcuh support and its overwhelming. But I love it
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  #124  
Old 10-28-2005, 05:35 PM
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hi queen
that was such a beautiful thought i had to commit....but i hope that your wedding is as beautiful and magical as you have always dreamed it would be!!!!!
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  #125  
Old 10-28-2005, 06:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cmhurd
hi queen
that was such a beautiful thought i had to commit....but i hope that your wedding is as beautiful and magical as you have always dreamed it would be!!!!!
I hope that it is as good as I dream also. Not a day goes by that I don't imagine what it will be like. I told him that is is going to have to he the strong one because if left up to me we would have been married.:love:
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