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  #26  
Old 04-12-2017, 09:48 PM
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Yeah that's not happening for us either.

Colorado no longer allows proxy marriages, but they do allow self-solemnization. Basically, to get married now you actually have to physically be there and exchange vows, even if just in the visiting room.

I just sent mine the absentee affidavit form to get notarized so I can pick up the license. He will send it back to me once notarized and then I can go pick it up. After I do that I'll be filling my part of the license out, sending it to him, we'll say our vows at visit, then he'll fill his side out, we'll both sign as officiant (that's how it's done self-solemnized) and then I'll file it.

I'm spending about a month in Colorado before I head back to California. Unless he gets approved for parole on his hearing on April 27th, which I'll be at.

We're aiming for May 6th to get married, unless his mother's willing to drive me to pick up the license earlier, then it would be April 29th.
Make sure he goes through the proper channels on the DOC side. He has to get permission from the Warden. His case manager should be able to help. I thought they did away with self-solemnization as well, but guess not..??? Also, i'm pretty sure you won't be able to take the marriage certificate in to visiting for him to sign. We were blessed and the AW met me up front, took the paper in for me and allowed us to sign in visiting.
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Old 04-12-2017, 10:05 PM
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Default Wow!

[quote=Revenwyn;7618864]Yeah that's not happening for us either.

Colorado no longer allows proxy marriages, but they do allow self-solemnization. Basically, to get married now you actually have to physically be there and exchange vows, even if just in the visiting room.




Thank you so much, good luck, God bless!!!
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  #28  
Old 04-12-2017, 10:09 PM
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[quote=4Tommy;7618929]
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Originally Posted by Revenwyn View Post
Yeah that's not happening for us either.

Colorado no longer allows proxy marriages, but they do allow self-solemnization. Basically, to get married now you actually have to physically be there and exchange vows, even if just in the visiting room.




Thank you so much, good luck, God bless!!!
Actually, that is incorrect. I wasn't sure I would be able to go up (to visit), so we arranged for me to send the paperwork to his CM for him to sign and return to me and send back and then I would sign and have filed. Luckily, i was able to go up and work with the AW. There is no ceremony, we exchanged vows on our own after we signed the certificate.
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Old 04-12-2017, 10:25 PM
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Make sure he goes through the proper channels on the DOC side. He has to get permission from the Warden. His case manager should be able to help. I thought they did away with self-solemnization as well, but guess not..??? Also, i'm pretty sure you won't be able to take the marriage certificate in to visiting for him to sign. We were blessed and the AW met me up front, took the paper in for me and allowed us to sign in visiting.
The warden doesn't care whether we do or not, we just can't do a ceremony, his counselor has approved it, and his case manager said it should be fine.

DOC notaries aren't allowed to sign marriage paperwork but there are approved mobile notaries that can.

We'll be mailing the certificate back and forth.
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Old 11-25-2018, 06:42 PM
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I thought it was done as self solemnised but when I called the office of the clerk and recorder in Denver she told me that it can’t be done that way. I have to take the absentee affidavit with ID to them and they will issue the licence and certificate on that day. She said there is no need to have him sign the certificate, his signature on the affidavit is all they need to complete the marriage and issue the certificates. So now I am confused because everyone here seems to have done it by sending paperwork back and forth!
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  #31  
Old 11-25-2018, 06:55 PM
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I thought it was done as self solemnised but when I called the office of the clerk and recorder in Denver she told me that it can’t be done that way. I have to take the absentee affidavit with ID to them and they will issue the licence and certificate on that day. She said there is no need to have him sign the certificate, his signature on the affidavit is all they need to complete the marriage and issue the certificates. So now I am confused because everyone here seems to have done it by sending paperwork back and forth!
What you are describing is self solemnization. Just make sure he has permission as you will have to send back and forth. Another poster indicated that DOC notaries are not allowed, however, that may be facility specific since a doc employee notarized our documents.
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  #32  
Old 11-26-2018, 02:58 AM
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Thank you. The public notary visits the facility roughly once a month once she has enough people to visit. What is confusing me is that I thought I would collect the certificate and licence from the office, both of us would have to sign it and then i return it to the office to get it completed and get the certificate. But the clerk told me that’s not necessary. All I need to get a legal final marriage is the absentee affidavit, not his signature on the certificate. They will issue the signed off certificate the day I apply for the licence. I think I will cal again because it didn’t sound right. I clarified it 3 times on the phone because it seemed odd to me, but she was insistent there was no back and forth. All he has to do is sign the affidavit!
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  #33  
Old 11-26-2018, 12:12 PM
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Update!! I spoke to the clerks office again and they said that was incorrect information! Very annoying!! Who knows what the lady was thinking of?? She told me it is not possible to self solemise an absentee marriage lol.. oh well!!

Anyone who has done this... how fast did you find the paperwork was turned around? Thank you :-)
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Old 11-27-2018, 01:16 AM
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Update!! I spoke to the clerks office again and they said that was incorrect information! Very annoying!! Who knows what the lady was thinking of?? She told me it is not possible to self solemise an absentee marriage lol.. oh well!!

Anyone who has done this... how fast did you find the paperwork was turned around? Thank you :-)
We did self solemnization absentee marriage. Whole process took about 30 days.
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Old 11-27-2018, 03:58 AM
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We did self solemnization absentee marriage. Whole process took about 30 days.

Is that 30 days including the notary? I am arranging that 3 weeks before I arrive in Colorado to give him chance to get the paperwork to me. Then I will take everything to the court on my first day there. But then I only have 2 weeks to complete the process! I hope we can get paperwork in and out that quickly but my experience of DOC so fat is SLOW!!!
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Old 11-27-2018, 07:43 PM
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Update!! I spoke to the clerks office again and they said that was incorrect information! Very annoying!! Who knows what the lady was thinking of?? She told me it is not possible to self solemise an absentee marriage lol.. oh well!!

Anyone who has done this... how fast did you find the paperwork was turned around? Thank you :-)
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Is that 30 days including the notary? I am arranging that 3 weeks before I arrive in Colorado to give him chance to get the paperwork to me. Then I will take everything to the court on my first day there. But then I only have 2 weeks to complete the process! I hope we can get paperwork in and out that quickly but my experience of DOC so fat is SLOW!!!
He had someone at the prison notarize for him. The process for us was very smooth.
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  #37  
Old 11-29-2018, 05:20 AM
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He had someone at the prison notarize for him. The process for us was very smooth.
Prison notaries are no longer allowed per DOC to sign anything not related to the case or the incarceration. You got married before we did and they're slowly but surely trying to crack down on any ability for inmates to marry.
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Old 11-29-2018, 02:11 PM
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Prison notaries are no longer allowed per DOC to sign anything not related to the case or the incarceration. You got married before we did and they're slowly but surely trying to crack down on any ability for inmates to marry.
Most prisons have approved visiting notaries , we had to pay for ours but it was fairly straight forward to arrange.
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Old 12-02-2018, 05:51 PM
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Maytayah is right, an approved visiting notary can notarize the paperwork -- the trick will be to find a list of such notaries. Revenwyn is also right in that the state is working very hard to make inmate marriages a very very hard task to accomplish. They did away with proxy marriages in 2015 for expressly this purpose. It passed in the blink of an eye.

The clerk in Denver was totally wrong -- you always must have both marriage partners' signatures on the certificate to make it valid! Denver was not kind to us -- I found the clerk and recorders' office in Golden (Jefferson County), much more flexible. Golden is about a 40 minute drive from Denver. The issue for us was ID. Denver absolutely refused to process paperwork without a current picture ID from him. He could not provide it in absentia, as he was not allowed to give it to me. Jefferson County accepts birth certificates in place of a picture ID (or did at the time -- I'd check again to make sure that's still a practice).
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  #40  
Old 12-02-2018, 10:25 PM
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Most prisons have approved visiting notaries , we had to pay for ours but it was fairly straight forward to arrange.
Yes. I had to get an approved visiting notary. The one they had in prison was not allowed to sign.
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Old 12-03-2018, 11:43 AM
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My father in law to be suggested Jefferson county as he lives in Wheatridge. The case manager gave the the contact details of their approved notary. First thing the man in Denver asked was had I read their website, I said yes but I have questions. He told me (very rudely I might add) that a birth certificate wasn’t sufficient. I was asking if I needed it in addition to the prison ID and he said ma’am you obviously have NOT read our website! He really talked down to me as if I was stupid!! Put me off going there!!
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Old 12-03-2018, 01:29 PM
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We got a list of visiting notaries from my loves case manager. The notaries have to be pre approved to visit the prison. Once I had the list I started to call and see who was available.One lady was very rude to me as I explained I didnt live in the US and she was calling me on a skype number. She hit the roof saying I had no right expecting her to pay for international calls. She wasnt paying for an international call she was calling my skype number which was local to her.

The next lady was very helpful and she explained the process including how to pay and she went to the prison. She helped M fill in the affadavit and signed and stamped the paperwork and his copy ID.

There seems to be differences between counties, they seem to have different time limits for things and some don't allow prison ID.

Its not easy thats for sure.
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Old 12-14-2018, 07:24 PM
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We got married on the 8th December we self solemnized at our visit. Our process turned out to be fairly straight forward.

We got the absentee affidavit notarized by a prison approved notary and M sent it to me
I went to the clerks office with the affidavit and a copy of his ID. I went to Boulder and they couldn't have been nicer, very helpful people.
I filled in the marriage licence , they showed me how to fill it in for self solemnization.

I sent the marriage licence to M's caseworker and she gave it to him to sign with the return envelope.
M signed it and sent it back to the court and they are sending me our certificate.

We self solemnized on our visit said our vows and played games and ate our vending machine wedding cake. We were allowed pictures even thought it wasn't pictures weekend.

I can send his wedding band in with a copy of our certificate.

So we made it ,it wasnt without its stresses but we did it and we are both very happy.

Boulder clerks office did say they are deciding whether or not to continue accepting prison ID.

So good luck everyone who is going to be going through the process.
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Old 12-14-2018, 09:37 PM
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Originally Posted by maytayah View Post
We got married on the 8th December we self solemnized at our visit. Our process turned out to be fairly straight forward.

We got the absentee affidavit notarized by a prison approved notary and M sent it to me
I went to the clerks office with the affidavit and a copy of his ID. I went to Boulder and they couldn't have been nicer, very helpful people.
I filled in the marriage licence , they showed me how to fill it in for self solemnization.

I sent the marriage licence to M's caseworker and she gave it to him to sign with the return envelope.
M signed it and sent it back to the court and they are sending me our certificate.

We self solemnized on our visit said our vows and played games and ate our vending machine wedding cake. We were allowed pictures even thought it wasn't pictures weekend.

I can send his wedding band in with a copy of our certificate.

So we made it ,it wasnt without its stresses but we did it and we are both very happy.

Boulder clerks office did say they are deciding whether or not to continue accepting prison ID.

So good luck everyone who is going to be going through the process.
Congratulations! I'm always happy to wish new prisoners' brides the very best, having been one myself and knowing how frowned upon it can be.
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Old 12-15-2018, 04:46 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maytayah View Post
We got married on the 8th December we self solemnized at our visit. Our process turned out to be fairly straight forward.

We got the absentee affidavit notarized by a prison approved notary and M sent it to me
I went to the clerks office with the affidavit and a copy of his ID. I went to Boulder and they couldn't have been nicer, very helpful people.
I filled in the marriage licence , they showed me how to fill it in for self solemnization.

I sent the marriage licence to M's caseworker and she gave it to him to sign with the return envelope.
M signed it and sent it back to the court and they are sending me our certificate.

We self solemnized on our visit said our vows and played games and ate our vending machine wedding cake. We were allowed pictures even thought it wasn't pictures weekend.

I can send his wedding band in with a copy of our certificate.

So we made it ,it wasnt without its stresses but we did it and we are both very happy.

Boulder clerks office did say they are deciding whether or not to continue accepting prison ID.

So good luck everyone who is going to be going through the process.
What was your vending machine cake? Ours was pop tarts. :P And congrats!
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  #46  
Old 12-15-2018, 06:41 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maytayah View Post
We got married on the 8th December we self solemnized at our visit. Our process turned out to be fairly straight forward.

We got the absentee affidavit notarized by a prison approved notary and M sent it to me
I went to the clerks office with the affidavit and a copy of his ID. I went to Boulder and they couldn't have been nicer, very helpful people.
I filled in the marriage licence , they showed me how to fill it in for self solemnization.

I sent the marriage licence to M's caseworker and she gave it to him to sign with the return envelope.
M signed it and sent it back to the court and they are sending me our certificate.

We self solemnized on our visit said our vows and played games and ate our vending machine wedding cake. We were allowed pictures even thought it wasn't pictures weekend.

I can send his wedding band in with a copy of our certificate.

So we made it ,it wasnt without its stresses but we did it and we are both very happy.

Boulder clerks office did say they are deciding whether or not to continue accepting prison ID.

So good luck everyone who is going to be going through the process.
Congratulations! Your experience seems similar to ours. Very simple. I really think it depends on the county you go to. I'm just always surprised at the difficulty that some people have when trying to get married. I just think it is fate and if it is meant to be it will be smooth sailing. :-)
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Old 12-15-2018, 07:28 AM
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Thank you I have to say it was not without its stress but over all it was far more straight forward than we thought and the staff at Boulder were so helpful and kind.There was no judgement and they went out of their way to show me how the marriage licence needed to be filled out.

I am very proud to be Mrs M and I really don't care about the opinions of others. After more than 50 years on this earth I have earned my stripes to make my own decisions I don't need or want the approval of others. I know my own heart I know how i feel when I see him and hear his voice. After 2 years my heart leaps when I see his name on my phone. He gives me butterflies and more emotional support than anyone ever has. Although he still calls me out when I am going off on one and I do the same for him.We arent perfect this isn't a perfect relationship.However its what we want, we are happy.Thank you all for your well wishes.
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Old 12-15-2018, 07:31 AM
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What was your vending machine cake? Ours was pop tarts. :P And congrats!
We had pop tarts , a honey bun and some granola almond cups. We made a little stack out of them and joked if could ask for a knife to cut them.
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Old 12-15-2018, 08:26 PM
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We had pop tarts , a honey bun and some granola almond cups. We made a little stack out of them and joked if could ask for a knife to cut them.
We were allowed to break both pop tarts in half and feed each other lol.
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