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Adult Children and Siblings of Inmates For Adult Children, brothers and sisters of prisoners

View Poll Results: Biggest obstacles your released sibling will face?
Employment 230 61.50%
Finding living accomodation 54 14.44%
Emotional- low self-worth, depression, dealing with crowds etc 116 31.02%
Reconnecting with family, friends 65 17.38%
Everyday routines-money management,making own decisions etc. 121 32.35%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 374. You may not vote on this poll

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  #51  
Old 04-10-2007, 07:10 PM
Jillian Jillian is offline
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Alesha i understand what you mean my cousin is like that he went in , in his teens and is 29 now and still has quite a few years too go.

Here is a list of things your brother will and won't be able to to as a felon in the state of texas:http://prisontalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=215406
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  #52  
Old 04-24-2007, 08:56 AM
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I would have to say finding a job, nowadays almost every job requires crimiminal background checks even fastfoods
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  #53  
Old 04-24-2007, 09:00 AM
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I would have to say finding a job. nowadays evem fastfood requires either vriminal or drug testes
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  #54  
Old 04-30-2007, 11:10 AM
Lane's sis Lane's sis is offline
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I worry the most about him feeling like he is less of a person after prison, and depression. Mostly because he had low self worth, and depression before going to prison, I even think that is part of the reason he got whwere he was with meth to start with. And I am so glad to have found a place where I can talk about all these emotions I am feeling about my brothers sentence.
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  #55  
Old 05-22-2007, 06:42 PM
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Default Employment!!

My brother has been gone for 7 years, 2 months. and I think employment will be the hardest for him... he has never worked a job where he had to pay taxes or earn an average amount of money. Hopefully he will adjust to this new life style... He will be home(HWH) in 3 months.
Thank god he has me there to support him!!
Good luck to everyone in this kind of situation.
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He is at the HWH!!!
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  #56  
Old 05-22-2007, 08:14 PM
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Wow! three months, he must be getting really excited and stressed. I am glad he has support and a sister who loves him, it is a very hard transition after being locked up for so many years. Keep us updated on things.



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  #57  
Old 05-25-2007, 10:58 AM
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I sure will... Thanks!!
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without wanting to cry, that is when... I will truly be happy. ~Gina~

He is at the HWH!!!
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  #58  
Old 06-28-2007, 07:23 PM
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Default Employment

You know when people are stuck to one way of life and regardless if you are the total opposite and you show them it kan work, but they refuse to see ur way bekause its all about what they do.....I'm real sick that he locked doin 2 joints but its gonna teach him hopefully......
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  #59  
Old 12-25-2007, 06:06 AM
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My brother isn't in for that long, but I think his problem will be finding housing. He was with our parents before going in, but it would be better for both him and them if he found his own housing. Plus, he has to get a job to pay rent, right? Which comes first?
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  #60  
Old 02-13-2008, 04:31 PM
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I also think there should have been a few more options.

My bro-in-law will have the hardest time staying away from his 'friends' and negative influences, staying away from drugs etc. I think those two things will be his downfall.
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  #61  
Old 03-14-2008, 09:42 PM
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I think that we, as a seperate community need to step up and confront Legislation to repair the re-entry program, and create it so the result would be more equal for all. I think that making people scared of people who have done time for crimes is stupid. If they are really bad, then they wont be getting out. I am seeing more and more reasons whymy brother speaks of "maxing out" so matter-of-factly. This is a cold society.
When Inmates re-enter Society, I think that it should be known to few that he/she has done time for the crime they committed, but they have also spent time in programs that ordinary people wouldnt agree to participate in without a court order.

I think also there ought to be a new wave across our Nation that instills the purity of none perverted principles, and values. Without this, there will be no way to stop the youth from sowing their seeds earlier, and thus, landing more and more in prisons across the board. It isnt idealism, it is just plain common sense for the future of our children!
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  #62  
Old 04-02-2008, 02:34 PM
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I didn't pick employment but that will be hard so I probably should have.
Living accomodations not so hard because I would do anything for him, even if it means we all live in a one room shack.
Another thing that might be hard for mine in particular is the fact that I have every intention of being his new mother, I already have I guess and on one hand he appreciates the love, but on the other......
We'll both have some adjustments to make (I suspect some counselling or other support would help).
He hasn't even got a trial date yet, waiting on a prelim, but he's heard numbers like 8 to 10 thrown around.
He's getting pretty scared (as we all are).
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  #63  
Old 04-29-2008, 12:24 AM
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I like that in Canada most jobs don't require you to have a criminal record check. For most of these guys I think the challenge is filling the gap on their resume.
This just popped up on my CP as posted in so I came back to read it, I think it's cruddy that criminal records will haunt people every moment of their lives. Just another reminder that none of this is really about rehabilitation or reintegration
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  #64  
Old 04-29-2008, 09:26 AM
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I voted emotional, he has so many issues he needs to deal with... Also simply re-entering society when people are going to know what he did since it was all over the news. He's afaid to live here on the island, but this is where we live and we don't plan on moving. And since day one we've planned for him to come live with us the first chance he has.
Employment also is probably going to be an issue, although old bosses and such have told him he has a job when he gets out. Either way luckily when he gets out he has money to live off of for sometime so that won't be an issue right away. I worry everyday about how difficult it's going to be for him upon release, no one ever tries to see the person behind the crime.
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  #65  
Old 05-09-2008, 10:38 PM
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i guess - friends too, after employment ...
so many 'friends' went in the opposite direction...

so, in the end, family...well that's all there is...
and gratefully we are very close and very supportive.
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  #66  
Old 06-04-2008, 09:13 PM
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Mine is my oldest Brother, and he is eternally hoping that his family has been OK about helping through this time. It hasn't been an easy task keeping in touch, its hard to fill a couple sheets of paper on both sides...to make it feel worth sending. I don't have a whole lots of variety in my own life. I think mending this aura with him will help, as I have helped as best I knew. I think repairing his ties to the siblings will be something he will continue to do until he passes away or really gets a hold on life, once again. The legal address will be the most,, Job and cash flow would be next
oh to put an end to other people in his prison telling the opposite of What I am being told in Florida. Accountability with some Capital A!!
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  #67  
Old 07-09-2008, 11:31 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DLM View Post
What do you think the hardest things your sibling will have to overcome/deal with once released? (You can vote for more than one.)
i think it depends how long they been down and the crime.i think they would have to overcome everything.
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  #68  
Old 07-12-2008, 11:53 AM
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My sister has to find herself a bed in a program within a month of being released. I feel thats going to be her biggest problem.
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  #69  
Old 08-21-2008, 12:51 PM
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my brother will have to face so many obstacles. hes a sex offender(which he was innocently charged) but because of this, our whole family has disowned him and they dont want him around when he gets out. He just turned 21. He only has 2 people who haven't given up and wont give up and thats me and my mother. Because my family gave up on him, i have recently disowned my family. You just cant give up on someone like that. its wrong. so he has to deal with losing his family and trying to find a place to live and a job and being registered as a sex offender. being a sex offender is a big risk, so everyday he risks his life all i can do is pray that we will be okay when that time comes.
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  #70  
Old 10-29-2008, 03:50 PM
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The toughest thing Mac will have to deal with when he comes home is employment. My mom bought him a single wide mobile home this year. It was used so it's bought and paid for already. He had a car before he left and it is in need of repair so we'll trade it in on another car(no new- he'll do that a couple years after he's out). He has plenty of family support and has been in great spirits since he left in 02. He's a true soldier. He did the time and didn't let it do him. I'm trying to get a retail license or either my shop owners license so I can have my own business before he comes home. I wasn't suppose to start real estate class until next year but with the recent news from him, he may be home at the end of next year so I'll either stick with my cosmetology license(s) and open a shop, or get the retail license so he can be employed.

I pray things go well because I want to send him to school for accounting. He is AWESOME with money.
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  #71  
Old 11-18-2008, 12:25 PM
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I'm starting to think that another one of the biggest challenges my brother will face is changing his lifestyle.
Even inside he's gone through ups and downs in this department.
He'll stop calling all his old friends and focus on family and reading and whatever, then maybe one day no family member is home to answer the phone so he calls some old buddy.
They say 'so and so' wants you to call, then he's hearing people are talking smack about him and he gets re-involved. Especially with one girl. I know he's torn because there's a level of physical attraction, and when he's bored she can get the job done, but the result is he gets further involved and finds it harder to break ties.
I know it's hard now, but if he can't do it now when he needs approval for phone calls and they can't call him, I have no idea how or if he'll do it on the outside.
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  #72  
Old 01-10-2009, 07:04 PM
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i dont know what the biggest thing my brother will fac but he has been lockd up for almost if not 18yrs and has like 5 more to go but the whole will be his biggest obstacle im sure but i will try to be there for him in every way i can!!!!
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  #73  
Old 01-31-2009, 12:08 PM
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My brother is a wonderful hard worker, so I'm sure employment won't be a problem, even with the economy. My concern is the fact that when he was out (6 years ago) he was working the system on the wrong side and had LOTS of money and he never really dealt with the small stuff. Now, it's all small stuff - so he'll have to learn everything new.

But he's such a smart kid - I'm sure he'll be able to figure it out - plus, he has me to give him love and support and to help him.
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  #74  
Old 02-02-2009, 10:23 PM
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My brother has been in and out of jail for the past 5 years. After my mother passed away,he lost his place to live. Her house was sold and the proceeds divided between 3 siblings. Unfortunately, he foolishly spent his share within a year and ended up on the streets, no money or job. He had friends for a while, till he wore his welcome out. My brother can be extremely verbally abusive, and destructive to property.
I believe he has mental problems due to use of drugs in his youth (he is 54). He will not admit he has problems and behavior issues, and says everyone else is his problem.
My sister and I can't help him financially and there is no other family in the picture. I want to help find a halfway house but don't know where to start.
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  #75  
Old 02-08-2009, 10:10 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jowinifred View Post
My brother has been in and out of jail for the past 5 years. After my mother passed away,he lost his place to live. Her house was sold and the proceeds divided between 3 siblings. Unfortunately, he foolishly spent his share within a year and ended up on the streets, no money or job. He had friends for a while, till he wore his welcome out. My brother can be extremely verbally abusive, and destructive to property.
I believe he has mental problems due to use of drugs in his youth (he is 54). He will not admit he has problems and behavior issues, and says everyone else is his problem.
My sister and I can't help him financially and there is no other family in the picture. I want to help find a halfway house but don't know where to start.
Hello, Jowinifred

I don't know where you can get help for you brother I just want to keep you and your brother in my prayers. I feel your pain I have a brother who has spend most of his life in Jail and I always tell them that in a way there is a part of me in jail too because he is such a big part of my life that there isn't anything I wouldn't do for him. Keep pressing on.

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