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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: Your biggest worries
Job and Money Issue? 36 19.67%
Leaving or leaving for another Woman? 22 12.02%
Going back to prison? 60 32.79%
Your overall future with him? 65 35.52%
Voters: 183. You may not vote on this poll

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  #1  
Old 01-19-2004, 10:13 PM
bigbree31 bigbree31 is offline
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Default What is your biggest worry after his is release?

I worry about a lot of things when my honey gets out. I was wondering if I was alone in this. I would love to read all post. My biggest worry is maybe he will look at me and realize that he can get a younger person to be with.
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Old 01-19-2004, 10:19 PM
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sorry about the typos lol
  #3  
Old 01-19-2004, 10:30 PM
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My biggest worry would be him falling into drugs and alcohal again.
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Old 01-19-2004, 10:33 PM
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I'm not really worried about him or us, I am worried about all his "Fake A$$" friends who aren't around now coming around - trying to get him to hang out & how things will go down with the baby moma drama queen
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  #5  
Old 01-19-2004, 10:33 PM
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oh i like your crown for space invaders! u go girl!! well as far as my concerns with tito, i worry about it all. Him getting a job, re-lapsing, cheating, getting involved with the wrong crowd (again). I just hope it all works out. I can tell this one thing for sure, if things between me and Tito don't work out, NO ONE here is gonna know about it. You and another 2 or 3 will be the only ones to know.
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Old 01-19-2004, 10:34 PM
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I'm really missing EDIT - I do worry about how people will treat him and what will be said - I don't want anyone trying to make him feel like he is nothing again.
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Old 01-19-2004, 10:38 PM
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My biggest fear came true and that wuz that he would go back to using heroin. He wuz out for only one month and starting using again!!!...Very sad!!!
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Old 01-19-2004, 10:39 PM
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i worry about it all also..the cheating, his friends, him just not caring and going back to being locked up..but i just have hope in him to make the right decisions, and whatever happens i just hope it wourks out for him and he's happy, because i know i can manage, but i know he'll face obsticles that will make him or break him and i'll be around to pick him up..i guess we all just have to wait and see =) and just hope for the best !
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  #9  
Old 01-19-2004, 10:39 PM
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Hey can some one please add to my poll, Old Friends, Drugs, and His Family please man i miss edit too.
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Old 01-19-2004, 10:42 PM
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My biggest worry is him getting sent back. Also I hope he adjusts to living with us in a new environment than he is used to.
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  #11  
Old 01-19-2004, 11:04 PM
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I guess I'd have to say that my fear is that once he gets out, he'll decide that he wants us to take break to see if there is anything else out here. He's been locked up since he was 18-19, so he's missed out on a lot. I know that I have nothing to worry about b/c I am very secure in our relationship, but I have my fears which are normal.
I know that he fears that I may be somewhere and some other dude may peak my interest and I"ll want to see what he has to offer. We've talked about this on occassion, and we've decided that we are both silly, but it's just one of our fears. We'll live happily ever after once he's home. We already know.
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Old 01-19-2004, 11:09 PM
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I met my b/f in the inside so I guess my biggest fear is how we'll interact out here in the real world.
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Old 01-19-2004, 11:12 PM
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Wow I'm so glad i'm not alone I was like I'm scared to death that I have waited all this time for a man and it does not work. Some people seem to be so sure about things and there future and sometimes I sit here pray man I hope i'm not making a mistake.
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Old 01-19-2004, 11:13 PM
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Mine is that he won't be able to resist the temptation of drugs even though he swears he is through w them.
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Old 01-19-2004, 11:16 PM
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bigbree I hear you. Although in my heart I feel he is the one for me, there is always that insecurity and the what if's.
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Old 01-20-2004, 12:02 AM
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i am 46 and his 38, that he will find a younger woman never enters my mind , if he can find someone out there to take better care of him than i have then get to stepping!! what if you find another man when he gets out? my guy and i have deep discussions about cheating other woman and such and i told him if he feels the need to be with another woman then just let me know and i am outta here!! i am not that insecure about him and other woman becuz he knows he has a good life with me. i can not base my whole happiness and life on the whims of man. he is actually very jealous regarding me and i have been true blue since day one. sometimes i do worry he will violate his parole and do drugs or get drunk and do something stupid. since oct 31 his release date we have gotton a home he has a good job i love this man very much but if he decides his old ways are more tempting he has to go. its on him if he violates, i have my own life and worries than to babysit a grown man. just my experience

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  #17  
Old 01-20-2004, 12:08 AM
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The biggest thing I am worried about is the friends and exs that wasnt there comming around. I know he aint going no where, but I dont want to have to check a B***H all the time, got better things to be doing.
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Old 01-20-2004, 12:16 AM
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i think my main thing is the baby momma drama but most of all he is on parole till 2008 so worried he will do something to go back in they take ya for all kinds of stupid things
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Old 01-20-2004, 12:32 AM
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I'm (and he) are terrified about finding a job in the future. Although he will be going back to college this summer (either job full time or school full time), he still feels that he needs to work. He's like to get a part-time job while going to school full time, I'm not pressing that, I'm a 100% disabled vet with many educational bennies including his school and monthly stipend. While the extra money would be nice, I don't want him to get overwhelmed so soon and want him to wait till Fall to maybe get a PT job in addition to school. He is planning on a career in the ministry (he's got a BA in Theology but would like to go higher) and the church is much more forgiving of your past than secular busineses. Especially with his past position, a youth counselor with social services. Government jobs like that you must be pristine. He got written up and scolded for a traffic ticket.

That's what I worry about. I don't worry about alcohol or drugs, he's been clean for 14 yrs. He received a drug charge this time for giving his prescribed pain med to someone. Our relationship is wonderful, in our 16 yrs of marriage, most has been good, but since his charge 18 mths ago, it's been fantastic.

The job and finances are my worries. I live cheaply. He would buy a new car every year if I agreed!

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  #20  
Old 01-20-2004, 01:25 AM
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I worry about him finding a job and getting respect in the work place.. it is so hard for felons to find good jobs.. it seems people won't give them a chance.. I think that is Mel's fear as well.. he's been talkin about it alot in his letters.. I know he doesn't feel like a man if he is without work.. so I'm just praying it will all turn out ok
  #21  
Old 01-20-2004, 01:26 AM
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My biggest fear is him getting mixed up in some things to make easy money. He has a few friends that he has stayed in contact with all these years. There are others who pretty much forgot him when he went in, that are starting to come back around now that his time is running down, but he's completely written them off.

I'm not worried about another woman...if he thinks he can find better than me, more power to him...but he won't. I know what I have to offer someone and if he feels he can do better...like someone else in this thread said...get to steppin!

I just worry about him going back in. I already told him I won't serve another prison sentence with him again if he does.
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Old 01-20-2004, 04:01 AM
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My fear is the job thing. We are both getting up there in age and jobs are really getting hard to find. Not counting where he is coming from. He don't seem to have any fears. He says he knows he will find work without a problem. I hope he is right. He just wants so bad to come home and prove everyone wrong. It seems that I am the only one that really believes in him and that I do!
  #23  
Old 01-20-2004, 04:34 AM
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I'm worried about him not finding a job and finances being tight. Another fear is this big move I'm about to make (moving from Austria to Canada), and how it's going to be for our daughter (almost 4 yrs. old).... she doesn't speak English or French, just German.... but on the other hand, I know kids learn fast and change is easier for kids than for adults...
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Old 01-20-2004, 05:45 AM
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my fear is him going back to prison after doing 13 years ...........and wanting to catch up on what he missed out on all these years he is now 31 years old ...........
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Old 01-20-2004, 05:48 AM
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I worry too, about him getting into trouble when he gets out. He is coming to me to get away from his home town, but he will still be young and I hope he doesn't hook up with the wrong people. I would also hate to think I'll wait for 2-3 years only to have he and I not work out. Also, my family is an issue. They don't even know him and already are opinionated about us being together. I have decided not to even mention him to anyone anymore because I get negative feedback.
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