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Loving a Long-term Sentenced Offender For those whose loved one is serving 10+ years.

View Poll Results: what do you do when your man talks about getting his time reduced?
I encourage him, there is a good chance he may get out early 114 41.91%
Wishful thinking, but I don't get my hopes up 136 50.00%
I have accepted his sentence and encourage him to do the same 22 8.09%
Voters: 272. You may not vote on this poll

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  #101  
Old 05-05-2011, 07:02 PM
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OH YES! He tells me there is a small chance he will go before the committee at the end of the year....I mean, how awesome would that be! His sentence is not up until 2015 tho, he has been in for 6, so I don't get my hopes up, but I def dream about it
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  #102  
Old 05-08-2011, 11:14 PM
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Been in for almost 8 yrs & when he talks about the possibilities based on the Fair Sentencing Act being retroactive...I can't help but also have the same hope he has. I guess all we have is hope, love, & faith. To have him in 12 to 14 months compared to another 7 years, I will always pray for the shorter amount.
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  #103  
Old 05-13-2011, 02:39 PM
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I don't get excited but I don't let him know that I hope for the best but I've learned that with the CJ system it takes a small miracle to get out early.
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  #104  
Old 05-15-2011, 07:51 PM
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I stay positive for a few reasons. One, he is there already, so being positive cannot make his stay longer than the 15-L. Two, he needs encouragement, if he were to be discouraged at this stage of the game (he's only 3 months in) what the heck good would it do. Three, prayer does help and so we pray that his appeal will bring something less than what he has now. We just keep hope alive.
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  #105  
Old 05-16-2011, 01:52 AM
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We are almost at the end of the sentence , he comes home in august 10th if everything goes well. He has done his time and we are ready to start a new life.
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  #106  
Old 05-27-2011, 09:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jjernigan View Post
We are almost at the end of the sentence , he comes home in august 10th if everything goes well. He has done his time and we are ready to start a new life.
So glad he's coming home. I wish you both the best!
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  #107  
Old 06-07-2011, 04:40 PM
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My husband was sentenced to 20yrs, he went into Maryalnd DOC with 16yrs. His parole is set for 8 yrs. I've never been in this situation before so I don't know if I should encourage him or be realistic. In MD I believe its 51% so I don't know. After he was sentenced I asked his lawyer what he thought n he said he should be out in 8 if he does good. He has never been locked up before, really good head on his shoulders. Even the detective in his case knew he was a good person. If he does get parole in 8, our house will almost be paid in full so I hope that helps. Anyone from MD that has been thru this? Should I feel positive?
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  #108  
Old 06-07-2011, 09:34 PM
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The Supreme Court just recently ruled that Cali has to reduce their inmate population by 46,000...and they have 2 years to do it in. So, when I hear that...even though I know that Cali is talking about other ways of relieving the pressure (i.e. shipping them to county jails instead, etc)...I can't help but get a little hopeful that somehow that means m'love will get home a little sooner...... *sigh*
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  #109  
Old 06-08-2011, 02:09 PM
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He has 16 years until he's eligible for parole. I started to get hopeful because my bf feels he has a good chance in the habeas corpus stage he's in to get some relief on his sentence. He told me his lawyer said they'd start that process in another 6 months. He asked me to speak with the lawyer and the lawyer just emphasized how long these things take to process and that there were other people ahead of my bf. He couldn't really talk about the case, all he could tell me is that a case he's working now just reached the Supreme Court stage and it's from '08. I feel sick to my stomach and mad at myself for hoping for a quick turnaround. I just started this with him 3 months ago, he's been in for 6 years. I'm not doubting how I feel or if I can do it. I just got smacked in the face with the reality of what me and my heart have gotten ourselves into. Right now hope just makes me sick. Literally.

But the thing is...I'm really happy with him. I love the way I feel. I love the experience of loving him and getting to know him and myself better. I can be content and continue to live my life. I just need to go back to accepting the current amount of time he has and if anything changes, it will be a pleasant surprise. No more hope for me.
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  #110  
Old 06-08-2011, 07:37 PM
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Nah I just hope he gets through all of this no matter how much time he has to do. I always hope for the best, but I don't get too carried away.
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  #111  
Old 07-09-2011, 11:20 PM
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I know I've posted in this thread before....but wanted to update.

Usually I try not to get my hopes up...since he's a Cali inmate, I know it would be unlikely for him to get anything changed. However, I just recently really begun to try to understand what his sentencing all means. Here's how it breaks down:

What he was convicted of carries a sentencing guideline of 2-4 years. (I'll tell you how much he got for it a little later)

He received 1 year 4 months for the second part...false imprisonment.

THEN...he got a 5 year enhancement for "having a prior serious felony conviction and receiving a new serious felony conviction." (Which, btw the first felony was when he was 16 but was charged as an adult; upon his release he stayed out of trouble for 5-6 years before catching this case...which was the result of someone entering his home without permission and he beat them).

AND...another 1 year enhancement for "prior prison term."

Oh...and for the charge that carries a 2-4 year sentencing guideline? Yeah...he got 4 years...WITH a "second strike enhancement" which DOUBLED the 4 years...so he actually got 8 years on it.

So, technically speaking, his actual sentence for the convictions themselves was only 5 years 4 months.

BUT...

He has TEN YEARS in enhancements!!!

When I realized all this...I was so upset....and I just KNEW there has to be something that we can do to get his sentence reduced! At least get five year enhancement off (apparently it is seldom even used in most cases). I posted below in the Cali legal forum to ask for suggestions on what we can do to get a reduction in his sentence.

I was basically told there is nothing that can be done. That the way it is set up in Cali...it's legal for them to pile on the enhancements like that (which to me seems totally unfair).

When I read that...I cried. I know he only has 6 years left...and compared to the amount of time many of your loved one's have, that's not a lot. But, m'love has been going through a major depression the past year and it breaks my heart. It is really getting to him...knowing that basically, if he didn't have any enhancements on his case, he'd be home by now...even if they took the 5 year one off, he'd be almost home. It just sux.
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It extends beyond the borders of forever into the depths of infinity.
I love you this and much more."
~~M'love


Finally, happily married to m'love: 1/25/13.

Jeg lærer dansk (for et år) og norsk (for ti uger).

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  #112  
Old 07-10-2011, 12:25 AM
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Wehave conversations about that often... we know it will never happen...but a girl can dream
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  #113  
Old 07-10-2011, 03:32 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HesMyForever View Post
I know I've posted in this thread before....but wanted to update.

Usually I try not to get my hopes up...since he's a Cali inmate, I know it would be unlikely for him to get anything changed. However, I just recently really begun to try to understand what his sentencing all means. Here's how it breaks down:

What he was convicted of carries a sentencing guideline of 2-4 years. (I'll tell you how much he got for it a little later)

He received 1 year 4 months for the second part...false imprisonment.

THEN...he got a 5 year enhancement for "having a prior serious felony conviction and receiving a new serious felony conviction." (Which, btw the first felony was when he was 16 but was charged as an adult; upon his release he stayed out of trouble for 5-6 years before catching this case...which was the result of someone entering his home without permission and he beat them).

AND...another 1 year enhancement for "prior prison term."

Oh...and for the charge that carries a 2-4 year sentencing guideline? Yeah...he got 4 years...WITH a "second strike enhancement" which DOUBLED the 4 years...so he actually got 8 years on it.

So, technically speaking, his actual sentence for the convictions themselves was only 5 years 4 months.

BUT...

He has TEN YEARS in enhancements!!!

When I realized all this...I was so upset....and I just KNEW there has to be something that we can do to get his sentence reduced! At least get five year enhancement off (apparently it is seldom even used in most cases). I posted below in the Cali legal forum to ask for suggestions on what we can do to get a reduction in his sentence.

I was basically told there is nothing that can be done. That the way it is set up in Cali...it's legal for them to pile on the enhancements like that (which to me seems totally unfair).

When I read that...I cried. I know he only has 6 years left...and compared to the amount of time many of your loved one's have, that's not a lot. But, m'love has been going through a major depression the past year and it breaks my heart. It is really getting to him...knowing that basically, if he didn't have any enhancements on his case, he'd be home by now...even if they took the 5 year one off, he'd be almost home. It just sux.

just *hugs*
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  #114  
Old 07-10-2011, 08:56 AM
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I really don't get my hopes up because I know the chances of him getting out before his MEPD are slim. But I still encourage him and make all the calls, copies, inquiries, and anything else he asks me to do. We've submitted his case to stanford law project, innocence project, and another one I can't recall right now. But I doubt anything will change.
I would never want to take away his hope. But in my heart I am prepared and settled to wait for his first parole hearing. An attorney is working on his case but this is California and he's in on three strikes so chances are not good.
I tell him we will do everything in our power to get you home but if we are not successful we are strong enough to do this time together. I want him to know I'm with him 100% trying to get him home but I will still be here no matter the outcome.
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  #115  
Old 07-13-2011, 08:51 PM
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I believe because he believes. I encourage him to keep the faith and to pray on it. As long as they keep hearing his appeals they give him hope so what kind of woman would I be to shoot that down. He actually sits in the law library for hours working on his appeal...So... I believe and I encourage him every step of the way. Wouldn't it be wonderful if he could be home in a year instead of 10 .

****Loving the heck out of that man****


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  #116  
Old 07-14-2011, 01:15 PM
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you just have to keep apositive attitude and making sure that either way u still love him and think about him, with these long periods of time in prison it can really chagne the way a person thinks and as they loose connection with the world, your what they have to lean on and a reality they wish to return to, stay strong for you and for them. your all they are going to have.
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  #117  
Old 09-26-2011, 10:56 PM
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I get my hopes up all the time !he's been in there for a year &3 months ..last 6 months he was sayin he would be out next month ...and it came and nothing I get my hopes up too high and I get depressd ...I've doing alot better &just patiently waiting for him to come home .<3 no release date yet , bt his lawyer said he should be home by the end of the year ...
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  #118  
Old 10-08-2011, 12:56 AM
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I love to hear the possibilities of my Love coming home early, but I don't get my hopes up to high. There is a chance that he will get out early, he has 25 to life under the 3 strikes law. With all of the reform here that needs to happen here in California, I am sure he will be out early. Either way I am not going anywhere. I do love the hope of him coming home asap.
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  #119  
Old 09-04-2013, 11:43 AM
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i try not to get my hopes up too high when he talks about getting out early and our future together, because i know what the situation is and how long his sentence is. but at the same time i know the laws are always changing so anything IS possible. i just gotta hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
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  #120  
Old 09-06-2013, 03:36 PM
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Well he was moved to a minimum that is also a drug and alcohol programme. He is due out in july but should be out in February March because of the programme. Im hoping and praying
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  #121  
Old 04-09-2018, 04:20 AM
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My bf has been in for a long time already (24+ years) and changes are coming - they are flushing out those inmates sentenced under some old law and he's on his way to Minimun already... just waiting for that to happen.
At this time and age I'm in or we are in we are happy if he gets out sooner rather than later but we have a great connection and we'll take things as they come and one day at a time.
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  #122  
Old 04-09-2018, 01:06 PM
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He got life without parole, but when it happened he was so very young, now 13 years later he still hopes, and is quite sure, to someday be a free man again. I'm not so sure about it but I don't have the heart to tell him, so I encourage him to do whatever might improve his situation.
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  #123  
Old 05-18-2018, 02:50 PM
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I feel you both. however, it different in my case I hear things and I tell him and hes like no I am not gonna get out sooner I'm gonna be here until half of my time.

my husband got 15 years for agg robbery .. hes illegal so they say that ice wil come get him when he does half his time and comes up for parole but I tell him I don't know, they said that he will be deported.
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I know what you're feeling. My guy has just done 8 years and has about 9 or 10 to go. But for some reason he keeps saying "trust me", and that he thinks he'll be out in 3.

Now - we are no spring chickens! Our daughter is 24, and he was in prison a lot more than he was out and all the while I raised her as a single mom. We just got back together last year (after 10+ years apart), so I have not been doing all this time with him. But yeah, it's a roller coaster. You want to believe, but then again you don't want false hope. He hasn't even filed a writ yet, so who knows? I guess it all boils down to faith.

Last edited by patchouli; 05-18-2018 at 04:49 PM.. Reason: Merged 2 consecutive posts that contained same quote in both.
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  #124  
Old 05-26-2018, 04:04 PM
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I'm married to a man who is currently in county jail for touching a child. He always talks about coming home right away. I used to yell at him and say be realistic. But now, I just let him talk, and I don't respond one way or the other. He is looking at 25 years. We'll know by the end of this year what his actual punishment is.

On the other hand, I'm in love with another man who is currently serving a 40 year sentence. He has served 17 years thus far. He never talks about coming home early. I'm the one that talks about him coming home. He prefers not to think about it.
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  #125  
Old 05-26-2018, 08:19 PM
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I did have hope, but now I just don't know. He feel like the good to e credited will come back in Michigan and he won't have to service all of the next 5 years he has. Also he is trying to get time served ( 3) he did in federal before getting sent to state. So time I just don't know if I can do the much time. I'm a widow of 3yrs and 9 months. We are coming back together after the passing of my husband. Right now I just don't know what to do???
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