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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: Would you move to be closer to your loved one?
Have moved to be closer to loved one 20 16.39%
Are going to move to be closer to loved one 19 15.57%
Considering moving to be closer to loved one 55 45.08%
Would not even consider moving to be closer to loved one 28 22.95%
Voters: 122. You may not vote on this poll

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  #1  
Old 12-19-2004, 02:17 PM
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Unhappy Have you moved or would you move...

to be closer to your incarcerated loved one? The reason I ask is they are thinking about transferring my husband. Where they are considering is alot farther then I am now. Right noe it's a 5 hour drive each way, if they transfer him it will be a 12 hour drive!! So I couldn't just take a weekend to go see him because I would miss work.

Have any of you moved to be closer or are thinking about it? I'm kinda worried if I DO move they might transfer him again! One never knows!

What do you think?
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  #2  
Old 12-19-2004, 02:20 PM
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I am considering it but I am waiting to see if our habeas gets us back in court -- if it does and if it works, he will be out! If it doesn't then I will move -- I am in SW Ohio and he is clear down in SE Texas! I didn't get married to talk to the cat all the time although she is sweet!
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  #3  
Old 12-19-2004, 02:23 PM
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i have definatly considered it but we talk about and w our luck the second i moved he would be transfered. they transfer u a lot in fl
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  #4  
Old 12-19-2004, 02:31 PM
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vim1946 I'm with you!! I have 2 cats and 3 dogs and they just don't take my husbands place!! Adams wife4life they transfer alot in CA also!! That's what scares me. I live in AZ and he's in CA. Ughh
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  #5  
Old 12-19-2004, 02:36 PM
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I moved from New Hampshire to New Jersey to be closer to my man. For four months I was driving eight hours one way every weekend to see him. Got to be a little much!
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Old 12-19-2004, 02:48 PM
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I would not do it simply because I own my home and he's looking forward to coming HERE. In addition, here in Michigan they transfer guys all the time...my husband was in 3 different prisons this year - 7 in the past 6 1/2 years.

Last edited by mrsdragoness; 12-19-2004 at 02:50 PM..
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  #7  
Old 12-19-2004, 02:54 PM
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I was looking for a new job and jobs are easier to get in Columbus then in the small town I was at. Plus this way I get away from the c/o's I used to work with that where giving me a hard time. As a big plus I am 4 hours closer to Raven so it works. I don't own a home so it's not difficult to move. Well you know what I mean. If I owned a home I would wait till he got out so he had some where permenant to come home to. So I understand what your saying Mrs. D
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Old 12-19-2004, 02:56 PM
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This is a sticky topic between my guy and I. He's going to be released in 2005. He's very stuck in his decision that he wants to remain where he is which is 2000 miles away from me. His reasoning is that his family is there.

I'm very stuck in wanting to stay where I'm at because I own my home, I have a really great, well paying job, and my mom who is my only living family member is here and she's not in the best of health.

It's not going to be a pretty argument when this topic comes up in the future Anybody have any thoughts on my situation?
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  #9  
Old 12-19-2004, 03:10 PM
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i'm seriously considering moving some time next year. i'm in chicago and he's in texas and as you can imagine visiting doesn't occur too often and i miss him sooo much. i just want to be closer so i can visit more often. i plan on discussing it with him my next visit.
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Old 12-19-2004, 03:15 PM
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No, I would not move. I have a good job I have been at now for going on 20 years and I am very ill. I couldnt just switch all my doctors.

If I go on disability, I might consider moving if they place was a major metropolitan area and I could get my specialized docs. But, since I am not in a prison relationship, that isnt going to happen.

But, a couple of years ago I put in a transfer to Reno and got it. He was in Atwater at the time. He told me not to take the job because he hated Atwater and didnt want to stay.
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  #11  
Old 12-19-2004, 03:38 PM
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Right now there is an ocean between me and my baby. We have decided that it be best that i try and sort things out to make the move over there to the U.S. The distance is starting to really get to us.
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Old 12-19-2004, 04:02 PM
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i doubt i would move becuse he is only about 2 1/2 hours away from me .Plus i dont think i would make it in indo(the closest live city next to him) or in palm springs, i would spend too much money at the outlets out there. Plus i have my daughter and school to think of too.
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  #13  
Old 12-19-2004, 04:06 PM
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I considered moving to OH to be closer to Ray but after visiting the first time and seeing what kind of city the prison is in I changed my mind. He is in a really small country town. I am going to stay here in VA until he gets out and then we will be moving back home to GA.
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  #14  
Old 12-19-2004, 04:14 PM
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I have so though about this, and it may sound silly b/c my hubby is only about a two hour drive away, but still when you work one day on the weekend and you have kids that you drag with you every time you go.. it would be so nice to be able to get up drive 15minutes down the road then go home, but i know i sound like I am whining b/c I know there are some ladies that drive HOURS just to see their men for a few hours every weekend!!!! but just my thoughts!!
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Old 12-19-2004, 04:18 PM
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I am considering moving closer to my baby...in South Jersey now, he's in Ulster County, NY. It's about a 2 1/2-3 hour drive..was thinking about moving to either NY or north jersey. But I am in no rush right now, yes I would definitely do it though, to be closer to him.
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Old 12-19-2004, 05:39 PM
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I havent had to move...Marc has only been 2 hours from me the whole time he has been away...if it ever came about where he got moved really far where I couldnt visit every week...yes I would move...but then again I dont have any children or other things that could tie me down to one spot...not that children are bad...I cant wait to have a few...5-6-7??? LOL....But with children or a house that is being paid for, its just not as easy to pick up and move!!!
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  #17  
Old 12-19-2004, 07:50 PM
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I will be moving to the same state he is in when it gets closer to his release. I am renting and killing time for now. No kids or anything either. We will stay in Michigan for a bit until we can get approval from his PO to transfer. My job right now would transfer me, but I will have my CPA and masters in accounting when he is released, so I probably won't have to worry to much. We can't visit right now, so moving closer wouldn't do my much good. I know how old the driving can get. I used to drive 11 hours each way until I gave in and started flying.
Not looking forward to the cold and snow in MI!
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Old 12-19-2004, 10:11 PM
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If my Fiance agreed..I would consider moving if he is put in a prison that is really far away from here. We wouldnt sell our house. I would just close it up. I would just get a prn Nursing job . So I could quit when he got transferred again.
I could not stand it if I couldnt see him.
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Old 12-19-2004, 10:26 PM
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I have a good job and we own our house. My hubby has been transfered 3 times now and he agrees that it would not be good for the kids to be uprooted or me to have to start over. WA transfered him out of state and there are always rumors about transfering them again
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Old 12-20-2004, 02:43 AM
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as soon as the post office sets me free, and i settle everything here I will move 2000 miles to where my sweetie is...he's going to have 2 years there when he gets out anyways, I had planned on staying here, although i did look at transferring, but the post office has their own plans for me
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  #21  
Old 12-20-2004, 03:58 AM
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Well fortunately, hubby is only 44miles away, so no need to move. However, when he gets home, definitely want to move.

I feel for you all here who are so far away from your loved ones. It certainly cant be very fun to go the distance to make the visiting. However, I would hope that you would really think about the move in relation to the time left to serve. A move can be very costly. And who knows, you may end up having or wanting to move again when your loved one gets home.

Food for thought anyway.
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  #22  
Old 12-20-2004, 05:16 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 4MyBabyBoy
I am considering moving closer to my baby...in South Jersey now, he's in Ulster County, NY. It's about a 2 1/2-3 hour drive..was thinking about moving to either NY or north jersey. But I am in no rush right now, yes I would definitely do it though, to be closer to him.
Where in South Jersey? That's where I am.
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  #23  
Old 12-20-2004, 06:01 AM
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I moved, but I ended up moving in the opposite direction. I left New York. I cant say if I would move to be closer to Jeff. If I didnt have children, that decision would be easier, but I would have to say probably not. Unless there was some incredible job oppurtunity awaiting me.
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  #24  
Old 12-20-2004, 09:26 AM
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Luis is In NEW YORK, I am from New York living in Boston. Would I move to be closer to him...no. Not where he is.. I am planning to make moves sometime in 05 to go home to Queens. My whole family is there.. I am the one here in Boston with no extended family. I have my sons. So I am going to wait for my son to graduate the 8th grade so I can go home.

My main motivation for going back home is so I can be with my sisters and parents. I have been away for far too long.
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Old 12-20-2004, 12:34 PM
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I moved from Bangor, Maine to San Jose, California to be closer to my sweetie! (long story... but the short of it is we were living in Maine, but he comes from California and that is where he lived when he was married to his ex so that is where the charges were filed.) It was a hard move considering that I had never even seen California... had never even been any further west then the Mississippi actually... I was making the move totally alone... the only person in California that I knew was my fiance, and he was in jail!! Not only that but I was leaving my entire family 3,500 miles away! (Mom, Dad, 4 sisters one of whom was pregnant, 2 nephews, and a niece)

However, even though I miss my family a great deal, and have never even met the nephew that was born after I moved ... (he's almost 2 now ) every time I walk into that visiting room and I see his eyes light up and the wonderful smile on his face, I thank God that I decided to come and any doubts or fears that I ever had about my decision to move disappear as if they were never there!

Angi
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Last edited by awhickerforever; 12-20-2004 at 12:49 PM..
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