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Old 05-25-2018, 10:08 AM
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OP: you know your heart and you know your actions.

Here's the the thing; nobody knows how to distinguish between you and the cases where inmates play guards and staff. It's inherent in the population: some inmates will play guards so that they can a) do things and get away with it, b) have contraband brought it, c) expose other inmates, staff, and family to threats, extortion, and violence, d) escape. An extreme example of a relationship that went much farther than the op would be The NY escapees a while back http://https://www.cnn.com/2015/07/28/us/new-york-prison-break-mitchell/index.html

The other thing is that the institution does not know your heart, or how to distinguish between you and other COs and staff who use their position of authority to abuse prisoners. Such abuse happens so frequently that a brief internet search pulled up a case from yesterday. http://www.watertowndailytimes.com/n...nmate-20180524. Sexual abuse and physical abuse are serious problems, not just from an institutional liability point of view, but from the perspective of the inmate and the inmate's family. COs and staff who engage inmates are using their position of authority. There is a force issue involved as frequently the inmate does not feel like he or she has a choice in the matter.

And then there's you. You have fallen in love with an inmate. Fine. Whatever. But the issue that you have to deal with is that your relationship - not the feeling, but the actions taken on the feeling including but not limited to any interaction with the inmate that falls outside of the scope of your work duties - was inappropriate.

I hear it all the time from sex offenders - the victim seduced me, I'm in love and the heart wants what the heart wants. Doesn't matter - your feelings are just feelings. Your actions are what we're inappropriate. If you found the love of your life while he was an inmate and you were a CO, you should have not acted until he was not an inmate in your institution, or an inmate period.

So, there you are, in love, he's apparently reciprocating, and you are out of a job because of your actions. They will investigate. It doesn't matter what you actually did or did not do - it matters what they can prove. You are a convenient target for any contraband, bad acts, plots, schemes, or anything else they uncover. Remember, this isn't about you and your paramour - this is about the institution, all the staff and inmates in the institution, and liability.

So, let's imagine for a moment, that some inmate in the same pod as your LO was in was found with a cellphone. Said inmate knows that you've been fired because of your relationship with the guy who's now in the hole. He has a lot of options when they confront him about that cellphone. He can sit quiet and take the brunt of the blame and punishment for that cellphone - losing visitation, losing privileges, maybe finding himself in the hole as well, maybe getting additional charges, probably losing a bunch of good time, etc, etc, etc.

He can squeal like a pig and expose exactly how he got the phone, what he's been doing with it, how much he charged other inmates to use it, gang and other intelligence he overheard from other inmates while they were making calls, and other things that will probably get him killed and the source of the phone arrested and charged with bringing it in.

Or, he can blame you. When your LO is confronted about it, who is he going to back up - you, or the inmate who,s blaming you, the inmate he has to live with and who has connections that could include some very unsavory types?

It doesn't matter what you actually did do - it's what they can prove. Do not take the investigation lightly. Do not try to contravene the institution and try to talk with the inmate at this point. Your best bet is to sit tight. Once your LO is transferred to a prison where you have not worked, you can probably start communicating with him again without risk. If you play ball and follow the rules, you may even be able to visit. It's at that point that the investigation may be over. It may not. If they think you are associated with or have committed a crime, whether you have or not, they can investigate through the limit of time designated by statute. For some crimes, like murder, there is no statute of limitations, and they can come knocking on your door decades from now and arrest you for a murder that they have somehow tied to you and your time as a CO.

Now, please quit being so defensive about your relationship. The people here are trying to help you understand that your perspective is being limited by your need to defend your relationship. If you step back, look at what is in fact going on and how that threads in with other institutional problems created by co/staff cavorting with inmates, you will have an appreciation for the trouble you are in, and how long and difficult it may be for you to get to the point you can communicate with your inmate without it coming back to bite you in the ass.
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