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  #1  
Old 11-29-2010, 09:08 AM
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Angry BFF thinks my MWI must be gay because he's been inside for 15 years

Good Morning PTO.. I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving,

But the reason why I am here this morning, is because I am a little irritated .. I have started to talk about my MWI with my best friends because if he is important to me, of course I want the people that are most important in my life to know about him... Like my best friends, co-workers, and family... When I told my best friend about him she said, He sounds so phenominal.. How long has he been in jail? I replied, 15 years... and don't you know she said "Oh, He Gay"... PTO, don't you know I got piping hot . I just told her that I disagreed with her, and I was not going to argue with her because that is exactly what some people want you to do.. I honestly don't care what my friend say! Nothing could ever make me turn my back on my MWI.. I just feel like there are some men in prison who get judged just because of what the majority do, I know there are men in prison who are not lowering there standard because of there current situation.. What do you think PTO?
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Old 11-29-2010, 09:15 AM
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I think that was a predictable but thoughtless remark on your friend's part and you should blow it off for the uneducated opinion that it is, sweetie. Don't let other people steal your happiness. Truly, not every guy that spends time in prison is gay for the stay. Certainly, I don't have any factual statistics to base this on but I believe that in most cases, if a man goes into prison straight, he's coming out straight. You don't just jump the fence because you've been locked up.

Prepare yourself as you talk about your guy to other people that you'll hear more things like this. People who have never walked in your shoes and don't have anything other than generalized opinions on a topic will spout them off with alarming frequency as if they were the words of Moses himself. Let them know that you're not willing to entertain their negativity from the get-go. They'll see your confidence and hopefully open their minds to learn a little bit about your guy, rather than jump to an uneducated conclusion.

Good luck to you!
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Old 11-29-2010, 09:38 AM
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Omgee.. That is exactly what I needed... People are so silly these days, they act like prisoners are the only one who lower there sexuality standards, its men walking around us everyday pretending to be something there not... Like you said, I'm not going to entertain there negativity... Thanks Critter..
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Old 11-29-2010, 10:06 AM
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I agree. That is just a ludicrous comment to say to someone when you don't know anything about the person or prison. That tells me that is what she thinks happens to everyone in prison. Very uneducated and kind of makes your friend sound uneducated.
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Old 11-29-2010, 10:22 AM
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That's a girl! Something I see on these boards from time to time that sums it up...

"Dont Feed the Trolls" :-)

You know your man and that's all that matters...
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Old 11-29-2010, 11:43 AM
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When i told my cousins and friends about my MWI i started 2 hear tha samethang from them so i asked them...." so if u went 2 prison and ended up stayin there for 15 or 20+ years, You would be gay? " Of course they would say NO! Then i ask them " well what makes u so diff "? What makes you think ur so perfect that ur tha only one with that quality? They never have nothing to say back. I just hate it when ppl put other ppl in a box inmate or not. Uhh No Maam! Lol I know i shouldnt argue with them. Like a lady in a post above said its a uneducated statement. I just love seeing tha stupid look on their face when they realize how stupid that sound. Dont worry about it ma its just haters!

Last edited by His Goddess; 11-29-2010 at 11:47 AM..
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Old 11-29-2010, 03:55 PM
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There are some men on the down low who people would NEVER suspect and they've never done a day in prison!!That being said,honestly,let it roll off.It was a cruel and thoughtless thing of her to say but it's up to you in how you are going to react to it.don't let other's ignorance get you down.Keep on enjoying life anyway!!
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Old 11-29-2010, 05:51 PM
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I don't believe the "majority" of men have prison relations. My man says some do but in his opinion, those men were so inclined before they got there. I agree with that reasoning.

At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what your friend believes - it's what YOU believe about your man that matters. Brush off the rest.
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Old 11-29-2010, 07:33 PM
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LOL - I'm with tee.dot.q - MOST men in prison don't engage in gay relationships. That's just an absurd comment to me. Some do - but they were most likely bisexual to begin with.

As far as your best friend saying what she did. Do some research for her about it. Help educate her so she doesn't make the same ignorant comment to someone else.

I swear - people who think movies are factual just slay me.
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Old 11-29-2010, 09:02 PM
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When people make generalizations like that I tell them, "Um, honey? Your ignorance is showing. Not very flattering. You really should fix that."
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Old 11-29-2010, 09:09 PM
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Well I don't think that because someone has been in Prison for along period of time then that means that they are gay.. The sentence has nothing to do with them being gay or bisexual.. I have an uncle that did 22 years and my husband has done 11 and neither one of them have ever messed with a guy... But don't get me wrong it do happen but you can't tell by how long there sentence is!!!
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Old 11-29-2010, 09:36 PM
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Well my guy cuzin confessed to me that he was with a man when he was in prison and he is married but i think its more than sexual like bein cared for hugg n kissed ....... honestly i have my lifer that has been down for 19yrs....I will never blamed him if he has ever been with another man.....if i were in his shoes i would do the same ...so gurls dnt stress on the unknwn.....
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Old 11-29-2010, 09:55 PM
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Ppl are so judgemental. My babe has been in for 15 years and he's far from being gay. Why do ppl always make stupid remarks like that. Ticks me off.
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Old 11-29-2010, 10:06 PM
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You know for the simple reason of prejudiced thinking of Men who are in jail do I not tell alot of people. Its just stupity what people will say. You know how you feel about him and don't let others spoil it for you!
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Old 11-29-2010, 11:20 PM
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I had a friend who really didnt know me but had her own babys dad locked up tell me that she knows my husband must have hooked up with another dude because he has been down for 14 years. I didnt beleive one bit of it and still dont. Only you know your man and only he knows the truth. Trust your heart and the truth will follow
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Old 11-29-2010, 11:27 PM
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Wow tel herl to knock it off and quit watchin so much TV.
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Old 11-30-2010, 12:42 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HisBlueEyedGal View Post
When people make generalizations like that I tell them, "Um, honey? Your ignorance is showing. Not very flattering. You really should fix that."
Hahaha! I love this answer!

My guy has been down many years and still has 7 to go. He's told me before that, yes, some guys do get down like that but most do not. He said, in prison, if you do, you lose a lot of respect (not from him, he has no issues with homosexuality/bisexuality...but from other inmates in general)...and in prison, losing respect is not really safe, imo. Not to mention they run the risk of STD's in there.
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Old 01-06-2011, 11:46 PM
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Default 15 years in is he gay?

Your friend is as wrong as she can be trust me. I know 15 years is a long time. But that in itself would not demand that your man would be gay. There is the reality that some guys, a good percentage do wind up having sexual acts with other men. They do it for release and or the need to be physically intimate with a person. Saying that, Those men still don't consider themselves gay. In fact, when they come out the first thing they want is a woman. And they look forward to coming home and being with their Woman.

There are a small amount of guys that after a long time, befriend another and develop a relationship of sorts and actually live tofether as a couple
and have feelings and emotions for each other. But again. when they get out they Usually not always want to be with a woman when they get out. But they are usually more sexually open because of their own sexual experiences.

There are a very small portion, tiny! that once they go in and have sex with men, prefer to have men when they get out. I know of a few that were in prison at a very early age and spent almost their entire lives in prison. Because they have been gay in prison most of their adult lives, they have grown to like that kind of sex and look for it when they get out.

But a large percentage of straight men in jail will not and do not want to have a male partner ever, Even letting a guy give him oral sex, The idea just turns them off so much, they are just repulsed. Except for a forced situation these type of men will never have and kind of sex with another man no matter how long they have been in there.

The idea that a man will just "Turn gay because he is in there long enough is rediculous."







Quote:
Originally Posted by chasiwassi View Post
Good Morning PTO.. I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving,

But the reason why I am here this morning, is because I am a little irritated .. I have started to talk about my MWI with my best friends because if he is important to me, of course I want the people that are most important in my life to know about him... Like my best friends, co-workers, and family... When I told my best friend about him she said, He sounds so phenominal.. How long has he been in jail? I replied, 15 years... and don't you know she said "Oh, He Gay"... PTO, don't you know I got piping hot . I just told her that I disagreed with her, and I was not going to argue with her because that is exactly what some people want you to do.. I honestly don't care what my friend say! Nothing could ever make me turn my back on my MWI.. I just feel like there are some men in prison who get judged just because of what the majority do, I know there are men in prison who are not lowering there standard because of there current situation.. What do you think PTO?
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Old 01-07-2011, 02:45 AM
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Oh my Lordy I've heard some things & then I've heard some things !! Some peoples perceptions really make me laugh ! I'd love to hear someone say that about mine 35 & got testosterone & a raging drive like an 18 yr old lol
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Old 01-07-2011, 06:50 PM
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Did you ever notice the people that don't know what they are talking about say the most? That sounds like what your BFF did!

Last edited by Peaceismine; 01-07-2011 at 06:52 PM..
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Old 01-08-2011, 04:40 AM
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I believe some men DO engage in sexual relationships in prison but I don't think it has anything to do with the time they've done. Short timers do it too according to my husband. Many probably consider it but what it really boils down to is how preoccupied with "respect" they are. If their reputation means EVERYTHING to them they probably haven't done the gay for the stay thing. If they're not too hung up on the respect thing, they may have. That's also why short timers are just as likely to have sex with another inmate.
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Old 01-09-2011, 01:42 AM
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There is no such thing as goin GAY!! If their gay now they asses was gay b4 they went in bottom line!
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