Would you as a mother be offended if future daughter in law changed ring?

[MyBookins]

So my future mom in law handed down her wedding ring to me I love her dearly like my own mother... I do not like nor do I own "gold" jewelry and her ring just so happen to be gold, so my question is would you be offended if I wanted to have it dipped in white gold to match my other jewelry?

[JuliannRN]

I would ask her... I wouldnt be offended if it was just changing the color. Resetting it might be a different story.

[Sheryl P.]

Humm,it was a very thoughtful thing she did to hand down her ring and so I would hesitate to say anything that would indicate I was not thrilled to wear the ring.That said,if you never wear gold then perhaps you can ask her how she would feel about getting it plated in white gold so you have something of the past and something of the future.Still,you will be wearing this ring and so I would gently bring the subject up and pray she is receptive and not hurt.
Congratulations!

[1bird2]

It would not offend me or upset me in anyway at all. But, I do realize that others see things much differently...and are much more attatched to "things".
I think the fact that you are concerned enough to "poll" the moms, shows that you are a most considerate soul....and that would matter most to me....and I'd be thilled to have a someone so considerate as my daughter in law!
I am praying that all goes smoothy without issue...and that love covers all!
CONGRATS!!!
Love and prayers,
XXOO
XXOO

[JuliannRN]

1bird2,
I have to tell you that no matter what you post, you always seem to make me smile.
And I have to agree, I would be THRILLED to have a daughter in law like that....

[lesliew32]

Originally Posted by J&Loct15

So my future mom in law handed down her wedding ring to me I love her dearly like my own mother... I do not like nor do I own "gold" jewelry and her ring just so happen to be gold, so my question is would you be offended if I wanted to have it dipped in white gold to match my other jewelry?

I'm like you I hate gold. I would tell my significant other that you wish to have it a different color and let him address the issue. If your like me you'll never be satisfied other wise. So I say speak up. IMO its not ungrateful your just a different person with different tastes.

[LovingMomofRyan]

I am a MIL that passed down my engagement ring to my son to present to his then girlfriend. She and I are close enough that she said while she loves the setting, she wanted to have it plated. I honestly did not have an issue with it. In fact, I loved her honesty.

[MyBookins]

Thank you all sooooo much!!! She did in fact know before hand that I do not like gold, she in fact joked about it when giving me the ring but I was so overwelmed and happy of coarse I didnt care. I guess I will have to just ask her and pray all goes well. I have to get it sized anyway so hopefully I can ease it in that way in conversation thanks ladies.....

[LovingMomofRyan]

Sweetie..just be honest with her...remember, some day you are going to pass it on to your daughter or daughter in law. It's yours for now, and you are the one that is going to be wearing it and looking at it day to day. She loves you and she will understand.

Blessings~

[MyBookins]

So I went to the jewelry store in search of his wedding band and to get pricing for the sizing....... I asked about the white gold plating and an angel in disguise of a jeweler named cheryl heard me out on my dilemma, she mentioned that the plating actually fades in less than a year and then asked to see my ring which is a plain gold solitaire with a plain gold ring guard. She walked around the store and just kept staring at it and proclaimed "I got it"!!! She brought out a white gold ring guard with diamonds and said I know you dont like gold but try the solitaire inbetween the white gold guard!!! It was so beautiful my exact words to her "you are a freakin genius" so im gonna just buy the guard and I can just interchange them and no need to change or alter anything

[LeBeau]

What a great solution!
I also kinda like the symbolism of mixing the two different elements to create something that's new and lovely and better than either is on its own.... kinda like marriage itself.

(Be sure to let Cheryl's boss know how delighted you are, preferably in a letter- that kind of customer feedback would end up in her personel file and could help her the next time raises and promotions are being considered)

[rickysgrl]

I can't say that I would be offended necessarily. I think everyone dreams of having something of their own. If I was offered a beautiful ring that although I loved the gesture, but I had something else in mind...I'd communicate this to my future MIL and compromise. I'd either keep it as a keepsake or somehow combine it with a new ring...or make changes to it.

I'm a firm believer of doing what you want otherwise you won't be satisfied. A wedding ring is forever (Well, it should be) and why wear it if you're not 100% in love with it.

I'd personally give the ring as a keepsake. If she likes it, she likes it. If she doesn't wear it, I would still be more than happy with her having it in her posession.

[KidzMom]

Originally Posted by JuliannRN

1bird2,
I have to tell you that no matter what you post, you always seem to make me smile.
And I have to agree, I would be THRILLED to have a daughter in law like that....

Ditto JuliannRN well said!