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Friends & Families of Addicts Information for coping, dealing & living with a loved one's addictive behavior.

View Poll Results: Was Drugs/Alcohol a factor in why he's in?
No drugs/alcohol had no part of it. 66 7.28%
Yes, they are the reason. 395 43.55%
Yes, they made him do stupid things. 434 47.85%
No answer 12 1.32%
Voters: 907. You may not vote on this poll

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  #326  
Old 04-29-2015, 02:21 PM
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He's 25, heroin addict since 16, in and out of rehab 4 times, jail - I've lost count - and is now starting a 36 month sentence related to his addiction. I want to believe with all my heart he'll be able to stay clean inside wherever he's sent & he'll leave his life of addiction & crime behind forever, but I know it will be a long shot. Does anyone have info about which Oregon correctional institutions are notorious for drugs? He has a positive outlook right now so I want to keep mine the same.
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  #327  
Old 05-10-2015, 05:54 PM
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My husband is a really bad heroin addict. He is currently facing charges for theft for stealing to get money for heroin and then last night he got arrested on possession charges. Not sure if it was heroin or xanax cuz he was pretty messed up and idk the story yet.
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  #328  
Old 05-19-2015, 04:56 PM
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he never thinks he will get caught. prison, counselling, jail, rehab, half-way house, drugs in all of these places. now back in prison, it goes on and on. violates parole, like it is ok to do this. will he ever learn?
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  #329  
Old 06-09-2015, 05:06 AM
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yeppp . . he was on meth . he had been doing really good , he got a job and was saving up his money , but due to some petty charges he ended up back in jail & i think that's when he gave up . after he got out he started hanging out with his old friends and doing drugs . i didn't hear from him for days at a time , until eventually he just ended up blocking me out all together (three months) . . i didn't hear from him again until he got arrested this last time
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  #330  
Old 07-08-2015, 08:09 PM
starbright31 starbright31 is offline
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I know for a fact he was high as a kite on drugs or looking for something to sell for money to buy drugs
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  #331  
Old 08-18-2015, 10:29 AM
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Never knew the extent of his use until he was incarcerated and sober enough to open up.
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  #332  
Old 08-24-2015, 04:56 PM
desertskys desertskys is offline
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Meth was my son's downfall after many years of drug use ,sales and transportation, distribution. you name it.. But those sentences were just a few months or so & probation then with his long time friend one night , after being up for four nights they did a home invasion that went horribly wrong , even thou my son didn't do the crime he was there. so He's now doing a life with out the possiability of parole sentence.But even with this last charge i don't think he would have stopped his meth use .He had made it his way of life. Now we are stuck with "the prison mentality" Which I think is horrible as well.
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  #333  
Old 03-12-2016, 05:50 PM
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Mighty Mouse like Meth. It makes him think he's 10 foot tall and bulletproof. He's not...hence why I call him Mighty Mouse
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  #334  
Old 08-11-2016, 05:17 PM
Katwickerham Katwickerham is offline
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Yes. Xanax and beer. All it takes is one time and your life can be forever changed
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  #335  
Old 12-01-2016, 03:17 PM
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Yes, every single time he ever got picked up / in trouble / sent to jail / prison - he was under the influence of something. He goes from the smartest, kindest man I've ever known to a mean, blathering idiot who thinks he's invincible and can do whatever pops into his mind. [Like being drunk AF and stealing a car so he could get to court for his latest DUI on time.]
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  #336  
Old 03-22-2017, 10:19 AM
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My wife was on prescription drugs for depression, which was actually bipolar disorder. She was suffering from an extended manic episode when she committed the sex offenses she's in prison for. It was later found that using anti-depression drugs makes bipolar sufferers worse. Hyper sexuality is one of the side effects of improper meds.
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  #337  
Old 03-22-2017, 04:20 PM
Silenus Silenus is offline
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That last sentence explains a lot of my 20's. ^^ SSRI's do not mix with BP well. Also, the wrong drug can make their manic episode more frequent and more intense.

For my husband he wasn't doing street drugs. I believe the prescription drugs he was on at the time contorted his thought process causing him to act impulsively among many other things. I wouldn't say that's why he's there it just gives light as to how he arrived at that destructive way of thinking.
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  #338  
Old 03-23-2017, 07:09 AM
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Yes, he is a heroin addict. Had multiple years of sobriety and then would relapse. When originally arrested in 2010 it was bad. Through the years he's gotten somewhat better but he has a long way to go. Before he was violated in November 16 he was attending aa meetings on his own, sometimes I'd go to open ones with him. He started seeing a ptsd therapist on his own, and was on a wait list for meds (vivitrol or methadone) through the county, although he was accepted to that 6 weeks after arrest. We'll see what he does when he comes home in 3-5 months. I Cannot get, nor keep, him sober. I cannot make him walk the better path with my and our new baby. he has to want to walk it on his own next to me. Don't know if he can and that's heartbreaking for me to say especially laying next to our 7 week old daughter. But i don't know. It's all he's ever known, it's the only way he's ever coped with life and the pain of his past, and the truly terrible things he's lived with and had happened to him. I'm hoping aa, sponsor, therapist, meds and myself can guide him and give him the tools he'll need to get through to the other side and stay there, but in the end, the choice will be his. I always said drugs are his mistress. I can't compete with her. She can reach the deepest darkest parts of him that i can't go. He finds comfort in her and has for 25 years. It's hard to let go of that relationship. I understand it. But i can't live with it. And even when he tries to break up with "her", she'll whisper in his ear at night, sometimes every night, to come back to her. whether he is strong enough to walk away and leave her forever remains to be seen. I will say i wrote this long letter with the mistress angle to him in Willard. Really used the analogy and spoke from the heart about what it feels like to compete with "her". Willard counselor asked permission from me, made copies of my letter and uses it for training purposes now in classes lol the analogy works and the guys can understand it that way. That the drug use is looked at as a relationship with a woman behind your back. It's going to be a very long road for him, maybe someday he'll find a way through and we can enjoy this life as we're meant too together. After 25 years knowing one another and being together as kids, divorcing my ex husband for him, having a baby, starting a business, and when together being perfect for each other, i can only pray we find a way back from this darkness we're living in now. Best of luck to you all.

Last edited by Heather7378; 03-23-2017 at 07:17 AM..
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  #339  
Old 03-27-2017, 11:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by suziexo_ View Post
yeppp . . he was on meth . he had been doing really good , he got a job and was saving up his money , but due to some petty charges he ended up back in jail & i think that's when he gave up . after he got out he started hanging out with his old friends and doing drugs . i didn't hear from him for days at a time , until eventually he just ended up blocking me out all together (three months) . . i didn't hear from him again until he got arrested this last time
Well He called you, and that means you are very important to him. So I hope you can get some comfort from that. When you only get one phone call, who are you gonna call?

Last edited by russelln61; 03-28-2017 at 12:01 AM..
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  #340  
Old 03-27-2017, 11:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WaitingWilkes View Post
My wife was on prescription drugs for depression, which was actually bipolar disorder. She was suffering from an extended manic episode when she committed the sex offenses she's in prison for. It was later found that using anti-depression drugs makes bipolar sufferers worse. Hyper sexuality is one of the side effects of improper meds.
Im a veteran, and have alot of access to prescription drugs. I avoid them like the plague. I have never taken one that helped me yet. From my experience SSRIs are some of the worst drugs, but they pass them out like candy these days. Whenever I am admitted into a Veterans Administration hospital one of the standard questions is what medications are you currently taking. I always just grin. Im self medicating ..and not with the bullshit yall are passing out. And the only problem is that they have made the drugs that work illegal to use or possess.

Last edited by russelln61; 03-28-2017 at 12:13 AM..
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  #341  
Old 04-05-2017, 03:23 PM
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in my experience with my son's addiction we have found that most rehab places will de-tox you and send you on your way. We now know that unless you treat the reason he is doing drugs in the first place, that they will fail. It takes over a year, after detox for your brain and emotions to begin to heal from addiction to oxy and such drugs. without intense mental rehab many will go back to the mind numbing solution to their emotional problems.
my son has been in prison for 2 years due to forgery, yes he was high and trying to get money to buy more drugs. while in prison he took every class they offered on drug abuse and related problems. He told me its the first time in years he has had a clear head to actually think with and make clear decisions about life. To date he has been clean, staying out of trouble, taking his ged, working out and working, trying for an early release. You just have to want to change bad enough that it the only option left for you as all the love in the world wont cure whats wrong in their head. so hang in there, don't ever give up on your LO, don't enable them but don't stop loving them as that is when they they need you more than ever.
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  #342  
Old 04-05-2017, 05:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Heather7378 View Post
Yes, he is a heroin addict. Had multiple years of sobriety and then would relapse...I'm hoping aa, sponsor, therapist, meds and myself can guide him and give him the tools he'll need to get through to the other side and stay there, but in the end, the choice will be his.

This is something my LO has told me several times. She knows that she is the only person who can keep her from relapsing. She has to fight for her life. I believe she hit rock bottom during this last incarceration, but only time will tell.
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  #343  
Old 04-07-2017, 12:19 PM
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My son is not in specifically because of drugs. But there is not a snowball's chance he would have done what put him in were it not for his addiction.

His 4 year progression - Army injury, prescription opiates, surgery, more prescription opiates, buying pills on the street, heroin. In hindsight I learned intervention is important as soon as you start to even smell there is a problem. I knew, but always too little too late in doing something about it. And some degree of not wanting to admit how bad it was getting. A person starts using hard drugs for lots of reasons. The sooner the better for trying to stop it.

Now some 2 to 3 years later, we've learned prison is a tough environment for an addict. Yes can find some support in there. A lot of unhelpful things too. I believe my continuing support is important.
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  #344  
Old 04-27-2017, 10:28 AM
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This is something my LO has told me several times. She knows that she is the only person who can keep her from relapsing. She has to fight for her life. I believe she hit rock bottom during this last incarceration, but only time will tell.
Exactly. They have to want it. It's they only way it works. Don't know if mine is ready yet, but I'll guess we'll find out
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  #345  
Old 04-29-2017, 06:04 AM
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He was completely sober at that time.
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