Welcome to the Prison Talk Online Community! Take a Minute and Sign Up Today!






Go Back   Prison Talk > FOR FAMILY & FRIENDS > Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison
Register Entertainment FAQ Calendar Mark Forums Read

Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

View Poll Results: Does he ask for too much money?
No, not at all 351 58.89%
Sometime he does 165 27.68%
Way to much money 55 9.23%
He sends money instead 40 6.71%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 596. You may not vote on this poll

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #101  
Old 10-08-2012, 07:05 AM
Mitch67 Mitch67 is offline
Account Closed
 

Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 1,796
Thanks: 831
Thanked 1,803 Times in 837 Posts
Default

My man would never ask for anything other than text books for study as that keeps him sane! I send money, a little here and there birthdays and Christmas but he doesn't ask nor does he expect. He draws cards and things when he needs a little extra so he gets taken care of without me sending in money.

To the OP expecting so much when you are trying to make it out here with kids is just grossly unfair and selfish. He needs to get his priorities right and that should be the people that he left behind to fend for themselves when he messed up. Put your foot down now unless you want a long hard ride.

Last edited by Mitch67; 10-08-2012 at 07:06 AM..
Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
  #102  
Old 10-08-2012, 08:46 AM
Mitch67 Mitch67 is offline
Account Closed
 

Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 1,796
Thanks: 831
Thanked 1,803 Times in 837 Posts
Default

My man also draws cards and pictures and things when he needs to make a little extra cash. He has restitution so he prefers being sent packages, books and music and the like rather than cash. He says that all he needs is soap and deodarant everything else is a luxury!
Reply With Quote
  #103  
Old 12-11-2012, 09:08 PM
wizewifey's Avatar
wizewifey wizewifey is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Ny.
Posts: 1,466
Thanks: 171
Thanked 301 Times in 212 Posts
Default

My husband doesn't ask for much..I send him a food package each month and toiletries when he needs them but as far as money not really!! I do what I can and if I can't I'll tell sorry babe I can't an he will do without!
Reply With Quote
  #104  
Old 12-29-2012, 08:27 PM
S.o.A.Fan's Avatar
S.o.A.Fan S.o.A.Fan is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: California
Posts: 745
Thanks: 30
Thanked 128 Times in 90 Posts
Default

At times. My biggest pet peev is wasting money. What in the milk duds do you need a watch? You wanna know the time call mother time.. Haha seriously ask a c.o.I can go on and on.

Sons of Anarchy Fan! That program rocks!!! Sent by: HD Sunshine Smartphone
Reply With Quote
  #105  
Old 12-30-2012, 01:56 AM
MrsSavage MrsSavage is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 96
Thanks: 0
Thanked 20 Times in 16 Posts
Default

Smh! This has been an issue for a while. This is his first bid. But he's in for a rude awakening he's gon have to learn to go without the extras. I wish I cld send packages
Reply With Quote
  #106  
Old 12-30-2012, 01:59 AM
TonysBabay TonysBabay is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Kentucky USA
Posts: 83
Thanks: 33
Thanked 27 Times in 17 Posts
Default

He never asks me for money. Ever. I do know his momma send him like 50 a month tho. I pay for all our calls and send him stamps. And on special occasions, you know Christmas and birthdays, I get him something real nice. But phfff on sending him money for ball shorts and playstations and all that crap. He need to grow up and man up. Its prison, not the price is right.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to TonysBabay For This Useful Post:
krncpd35 (12-15-2013)
  #107  
Old 01-07-2013, 04:14 PM
babygirlj babygirlj is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: florida
Posts: 1,121
Thanks: 2
Thanked 421 Times in 253 Posts
Default

Absolutely he is a spoiled brat...i think the one that pissed me off the most was the palm tree sheets that someone had & he had to have so he out bid another dummy....$100
Reply With Quote
  #108  
Old 01-08-2013, 09:26 PM
waitin4appeal's Avatar
waitin4appeal waitin4appeal is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Right here at my keyboard
Posts: 364
Thanks: 111
Thanked 159 Times in 112 Posts
Default

The worst is if he gets upset and claims he just needs to speak his mind blah blah blah. Seriously, I get that we will have arguments sometimes, but when it eats up all the money off the phone it really bothers me. Then of course, we make up and have to ration calls until payday. I already spend a pretty penny on phone calls because that's our main form of contact but I don't have the patience to shell out more to hear him argue. I have to admit I'm a bit of a hypocrite though, because he's only called twice today and now I'm get sad.
__________________
Baby we've got nothing without love
Darling you've got enough for the both of us
Reply With Quote
  #109  
Old 03-07-2013, 10:40 PM
LaLuuz LaLuuz is offline
Banned
 

Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Tx,US
Posts: 67
Thanks: 82
Thanked 68 Times in 27 Posts
Default

He never asks for money. He pretty much HAS to have a calendar or he goes nuts. Since we got married his mom backed off a little on taking care of him and he didn't tell me he'd been using a piece of paper he drew a calendar on for the month. He mentioned something about "messing up" his calendar and that's when I drug it out of him that he didn't have a new one for the year and that he draws a new one for each month himself. The only thing I pay for is our phone calls which are extremely expensive. If he ever gets sick I'll pay the $100 medical copay for the year but he even refuses for me to pay that. He has asked me to send money to a friend who has zero family or friends or anyone on the outside to support or help him out. But I've only done that twice because it'll cause both of them to get a case. My husband will silently suffer before he ever takes anything from me or my kids. It actually really hurts my heart. He has savings in the bank from before he went to prison and he had his mom take money out of it to pay for me to take my nursing boards without telling me before we got married. It was almost $400.00 and without him doing that, it would've taken 6 months for me to be afford to take that test and get my license.

Last edited by LaLuuz; 03-07-2013 at 10:43 PM..
Reply With Quote
  #110  
Old 04-11-2013, 06:58 AM
brittanylauren's Avatar
brittanylauren brittanylauren is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Dallas, tx, u.s.
Posts: 163
Thanks: 187
Thanked 77 Times in 46 Posts
Default

No...in his 7 years i only sent $50 twice when he asked...normally his mama or brother do that....but if he asked for more, i would....but u can trust and believe as soon as he asked, i sent it both times without hesitation! I have no kids or bills really so i can do that but i totally understand having bills and children that would definitely come first!
__________________
"I GOT LOVEEEE ALL OVER MEEE! AND BABY YOU TOUCHED EVERY PART OF ME. AND I GOT LOVEEE ALL OVER MEEE! AND I DON'T WANNA GET IT OFF I'M COMPLETELY COVERED UP IN YOUR LOVE!"
Reply With Quote
  #111  
Old 04-11-2013, 01:11 PM
tiffy1985 tiffy1985 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Minnesota,USA
Posts: 483
Thanks: 189
Thanked 122 Times in 104 Posts
Default

Wow@playstation?! anyway he hardly ever asks and I started sending money when I had a feeling he was in need and just too prideful to tell me. I told him he needn't be ashamed and since I am childless I can afford to send a nice amount from time to time. I always make sure home is taken care of first and if he's short he'll let me know it. Thankfully his family chips in once in a blue moon, but I told him if i'm living well I wouldn't feel right if my guy is in there and can't have those little luxuries in there. I do for him as i'd want done for me.
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #112  
Old 04-12-2013, 10:34 AM
hisbabygirl78's Avatar
hisbabygirl78 hisbabygirl78 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 134
Thanks: 91
Thanked 49 Times in 32 Posts
Default

This funny because he just snapped at me yesterday for sending him $30 on Jpay.

He almost always is one to try and send me money, he hussles but not in a bad way, he fixes TV's, CD players, hot pots, anything he can to make a little money or get what he needs. He had a pay ID at his last prison. Since he's tranfered I know he's stressing $ since he doesnt have his pay job anymore. he's way to prideful to ask me or his family for anything.

I knew if I asked he would say no, or if i told him i was gonna send it anyway it would of ended up in a fight. So i sent it without him knowing...he got snippy but I could hear the appreciation in his voice. His pride doesnt want me too, but the fact that I did it anyway showed I care.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to hisbabygirl78 For This Useful Post:
brittanylauren (04-12-2013)
  #113  
Old 04-12-2013, 10:53 PM
tyreens_wifey79's Avatar
tyreens_wifey79 tyreens_wifey79 is offline
missing him
 

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Iowa
Posts: 498
Thanks: 83
Thanked 115 Times in 99 Posts
Default

no way that's just crazy. he don't NEED all that. I send money when I can afford it.
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #114  
Old 06-10-2013, 07:06 AM
NE2OH's Avatar
NE2OH NE2OH is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Nebraska, United States
Posts: 102
Thanks: 2
Thanked 37 Times in 33 Posts
Default

The only thing he's ever asked for are envelopes and money on the phone. Since he's using those on me I don't mind providing it. His mom sends him money for commissary so he's covered there.
Reply With Quote
  #115  
Old 07-08-2013, 11:51 PM
nikkiraemills's Avatar
nikkiraemills nikkiraemills is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: VA, USA
Posts: 5
Thanks: 4
Thanked 6 Times in 2 Posts
Default

I am amazed at what I have read. My husband doesn't have to ask me for money because I make that $100. deposit to his books every Friday. I would never be able to sleep at night if I thought my husband was going hungry or needed anything. Yes I pay our household bills, and if necessary I would do without a few frivolous items to provide for my husband. My husband has taken care of me since day one, so why would I not do the same for him? I also pay for all of our calls which total up to about $12 a day. He's local and our calls are only 2.10. I can't imagine his mother or siblings sending him money, he's my responsibility not theirs. We're grown adults and take care of one another. My husband matters more to me than a Starbucks or a Mani pedi right now. I will continue to be at the jail every Sunday to make that deposit till he comes home.
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to nikkiraemills For This Useful Post:
Glitter1986 (07-10-2013), MsingHim (07-09-2013)
  #116  
Old 07-09-2013, 06:59 PM
ImJustMe123 ImJustMe123 is offline
Account Closed
 

Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 624
Thanks: 593
Thanked 468 Times in 243 Posts
Default

Not at all. Actually he asked me to please stop sending money when I was. He would rather I take my son places and start saving. I do pay $30 a month for an educational program so that he has something positive to do but that's it. He says that's more than enough. I opened that account and didn't tell him until after because I knew he didn't want me spending the money but he had raised a few hundred towards school through friends so I felt good collecting it for him and committing to make payments on the balance so that he could get started
Reply With Quote
  #117  
Old 07-09-2013, 07:02 PM
DonnysWmn's Avatar
DonnysWmn DonnysWmn is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: New York
Posts: 622
Thanks: 11
Thanked 433 Times in 234 Posts
Default

My husband asks for nothing. He does not like to have much in prison. The CO's then have control over you and can destroy it. Also when someone comes in and is showered with money and has all this stuff it makes him a target for other prisoners. If he needs shoes, that's one thing. A TV, well kiss my you know what.
__________________
There is love and loyalty, nothing in between.
Reply With Quote
  #118  
Old 07-09-2013, 07:04 PM
DonnysWmn's Avatar
DonnysWmn DonnysWmn is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: New York
Posts: 622
Thanks: 11
Thanked 433 Times in 234 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by nikkiraemills View Post
I am amazed at what I have read. My husband doesn't have to ask me for money because I make that $100. deposit to his books every Friday. I would never be able to sleep at night if I thought my husband was going hungry or needed anything. Yes I pay our household bills, and if necessary I would do without a few frivolous items to provide for my husband. My husband has taken care of me since day one, so why would I not do the same for him? I also pay for all of our calls which total up to about $12 a day. He's local and our calls are only 2.10. I can't imagine his mother or siblings sending him money, he's my responsibility not theirs. We're grown adults and take care of one another. My husband matters more to me than a Starbucks or a Mani pedi right now. I will continue to be at the jail every Sunday to make that deposit till he comes home.
No Prisoner needs $400 a month. That's just asking for trouble. But hey it's your life.
__________________
There is love and loyalty, nothing in between.
Reply With Quote
  #119  
Old 07-09-2013, 07:16 PM
ImJustMe123 ImJustMe123 is offline
Account Closed
 

Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: California
Posts: 624
Thanks: 593
Thanked 468 Times in 243 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by nikkiraemills View Post
I am amazed at what I have read. My husband doesn't have to ask me for money because I make that $100. deposit to his books every Friday. I would never be able to sleep at night if I thought my husband was going hungry or needed anything. Yes I pay our household bills, and if necessary I would do without a few frivolous items to provide for my husband. My husband has taken care of me since day one, so why would I not do the same for him? I also pay for all of our calls which total up to about $12 a day. He's local and our calls are only 2.10. I can't imagine his mother or siblings sending him money, he's my responsibility not theirs. We're grown adults and take care of one another. My husband matters more to me than a Starbucks or a Mani pedi right now. I will continue to be at the jail every Sunday to make that deposit till he comes home.

Must be nice to have the money to do that. Not everyone does. I haven't had my nails done or coffee out in I don't know how long. Maybe you shouldn't assume that women who don't send money are spending it on "frivolous items". I work my butt off to support my son and barley get by half the time. My man wouldn't feel like a real man if he was taking away from my ability to provide for my child and that is one of the many reasons that I love and respect him so much
Reply With Quote
  #120  
Old 07-09-2013, 07:22 PM
sarbear831's Avatar
sarbear831 sarbear831 is offline
i love him
Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: CT US
Posts: 1,849
Thanks: 446
Thanked 631 Times in 456 Posts
Default

He has only asked for extra money to get a TV. And honestly I did not mind if it meant that he could lay in his bunk and watch TV, and not have to worry about him having nothing to do and going crazy getting into a fight because someone started with him. He keeps to himself, we have our shows we watch together so it works. He felt horrible for asking for it. I only send money when I can and make sure my son and I are fully taken care of, full refrigerator, spending money for the week, money in the savings account before I send him anything. I generally send him $20-$30 every 2 weeks and that gets him his hygeniene items as well as food. I do not send him money for unneeded things and refuse to send more than I can because us out here come first and he is completely in agreement with that.
__________________
"loving him forever and always"




Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to sarbear831 For This Useful Post:
ImJustMe123 (07-09-2013)
  #121  
Old 07-09-2013, 10:32 PM
MsingHim's Avatar
MsingHim MsingHim is offline
Registered User

Pumpkin Hunt Participant 2014 

 

Join Date: May 2013
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 112
Thanks: 67
Thanked 83 Times in 49 Posts
Default

I agree with nikkiraemills.... When he was home I had everything I needed and then some. He doesn't ask me for anything if anything he gets upset when I do but I put what I can on there. There may come a time when I can't so he will have it. My husband budget's so his $ lasts for awhile. I understand everyone can't do it bc it's not in their means or they have to take care of their household things but everyone is entitled to do what they with what they can.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to MsingHim For This Useful Post:
Glitter1986 (07-10-2013)
  #122  
Old 07-10-2013, 11:52 AM
Blessed817 Blessed817 is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Foros, TX
Posts: 276
Thanks: 132
Thanked 121 Times in 76 Posts
Default

YES he is VERY materialistic! BUT his parents send him $$ every month, I don't. I have helped out to get him a pair of RX eyeglasses back in 2010 and at that they were PRADA $$$! Me and his parents split the bill. I didn't mind because it was something he needed and for something like that - he will use everyday yes I will go all out. But it was a headache everything I had to go through so that he could keep his eyeglasses. They were approved then he had to send them back b/c he chipped a lens and when they got repaired and sent back to the prison they didn't accept them b/c they were name brand- even though the first time they accepted them! I had to write letters and talk to his unit manager. But he finally got to keep his glasses . He mentioned a while back it was time for a new pair and I told him his ass should be happy he even got those he has! All the BS I went through! lol
Reply With Quote
  #123  
Old 07-10-2013, 05:16 PM
babygirlj babygirlj is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: florida
Posts: 1,121
Thanks: 2
Thanked 421 Times in 253 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by waitin4appeal
The worst is if he gets upset and claims he just needs to speak his mind blah blah blah. Seriously, I get that we will have arguments sometimes, but when it eats up all the money off the phone it really bothers me. Then of course, we make up and have to ration calls until payday. I already spend a pretty penny on phone calls because that's our main form of contact but I don't have the patience to shell out more to hear him argue. I have to admit I'm a bit of a hypocrite though, because he's only called twice today and now I'm get sad.
oh my god my husband at times will call 6x in a row when we are fighting and he repeats himself lol i know what ur going through!!
Reply With Quote
  #124  
Old 07-12-2013, 02:37 PM
babygirl350 babygirl350 is offline
Peaceful
Donation Award 
 

Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Kentucky, USA
Posts: 11,508
Thanks: 1,056
Thanked 1,088 Times in 567 Posts
Default

I think when we first met in 1998, he did. It was always something. Of course I had it then and had no problem in sharing. Over time tho, finances have been difficult, so for several years now, he doesn't ask for anything extra.

I reminded him it isn't just the money that I provide him for extra things. I have never had my phone blocked because I couldn't pay the bill. I spend alot of money on postage each month. I always take the maximum amount on visits and I expect him to eat up every cent.
When he has eye appts or wants pictures taken I pay for that. I have bought subscriptions to newspapers and sport weekly papers.

I always remember him for his birthday and all the holidays. Where he is now, they get to purchase a special food order once a month. I make sure that is covered. That is $30.00 a month. So it all adds up.

I used to send a set amount for everything else he might need or want and now I don't do that. Now I just send what I can afford after all of the above needs and wants are met.

I did have him write out a list of some special things he wanted. I had him write it in a priority order and as time presents itself, I send him the money for that. He has found this works out better for him. It certainly works out better for me.
__________________
Our dear friend Rosa passed away on 7 November 2014.
She was a kind, gentle soul who always took the time to welcome newcomers with an encouraging post and helping hand.
She made our forum a better place.
May she rest in peace.

~ PTO Administrators and Staff

Reply With Quote
  #125  
Old 07-12-2013, 03:07 PM
MizFormaldehyde MizFormaldehyde is offline
Registered User
 

Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Philadelphia, PA
Posts: 174
Thanks: 13
Thanked 30 Times in 23 Posts
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Larrymorales View Post
My husband doesn't ask me for money ...I just send him what i can...
Same. The only thing he really asks for is for me to buy phonetime. He can't do it himself.
__________________
"It's always the darkest before the sun rises."-Tupac Shakur



Marissa & Brian Burkhardt
VXIIIXII
XIIXXXIXIII
Always




Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 09:27 AM.
Copyright © 2001- 2017 Prison Talk Online
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Website Design & Custom vBulletin Skins by: Relivo Media
Message Board Statistics