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  #1  
Old 10-20-2009, 03:05 AM
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Default Never going to end (son picked up again)

I have had it. i really think this is my breaking point. Dante just got out of lockup again 5 days ago...... now he got himself locked up the last time but today they come arrest him again. His probation officer went and violated him again becuase my MOTHER called her and threatened her that if she did not remove dante from my home she would sue the dept. I am FURIOUS!!!!!!! Dante has done nothing wrong this time. But becuase my mother got a bug in her butt she felt the need to start more crap! SO becuase he has not went to school sicne he got out becuase the school disenrolled him for being locked up she used that to violate him. No one cares that the ONLY school he can go to will not just let him walk in and he has to through an orientation which is in 3 days!!!!! However How is he supposed to go school when they want to keep locking this kid up????? I am about to seriously go postal!!! My mother had better stay away from me at this point. I can not believe she would betray me like this. It is bad enough she is pressing charges and trying to get him put into prison for the other crap that happened and we go to court about on November 5th...... now she is not satisfied until she does it again. THen his probation officer does this. SHe will not give us the chance to get him into school and then wants to violate him for it. I am soo PISSED it is unreal..... SO i just sat here and watched them take my son away yet once again. while she looks at me and tries to validate it..... WTH?????? you can not validate this.... it is wrong and she knows it. gona flip her hair well i guess i will see you incourt tomorrow and walks off..... OH you better beleive you see ME in court and I have NO INTENTIONS of being nice or quiet!!!!! I have had it!
I will not fight if he is wrong but this time he is NOT in the wrong and the system is simply trying to prove they have power. I can Not Wait until i can get the hell out of this city!!!!! this is the most corrupt county here in this damn state!!!!!! She is going to tell me on the phone ... oh by the way she did not even call me to see if the lies my mother told her were true before issueing a warrent then calls me to tell me and says I am only trying to help!!!! oh really???? Locking him up and keeping him out of school and making my life a living hell is help????? I think i am good on the help then... thanks! However she goes on to tell me that she is talking to the judge and asking he gets 18 months in prison!!!!!!!! HE IS 17 YEARS OLD AND SHE IS DOING THIS?????????? I am seriously about to blow my head off here. I can not beleive this and i am soooo angry I can not even see straight. My brother calls me to apologize..... Huh???? you and my mother started this mess and now you dont want me to be mad? OHHHHH I AM SOOOO DONE WITH ALL OF OFF THEM! there was a reason i never lived this close to my mom and i should of stayed far from her....... I am just through...... I am done with all family. they can kiss my hiney!!!!! i am sooo angry with all of them. How dare they do this to me and him agian?????? I have sat here for hours now thinking about all this and trying to find a reason that would make this ok and tell me she did it out of love for me but you know what..... the truth is she didnt.... she is did it out of hate and anger towards my son. SO at this point i want NOTHING and i mean NOTHING to do with my mother, brother or anyone in the state of ohio who works for the state!!!!! these people do not care a damn thing about anyone,,,,,, just lock em up and everythign is ok....
I went and made sure he at least ate before they did this becuase i know they wont feed him tonight so she was sitting here waiting on me to get back from taking him out to lunch and i really dont care how mad she was or is .... I will be damned the last time they did this they took hm and he did not eat all day and they would not even let him put his shoes on until i threw a fit.... so i made her sit in her damn car with the damn police until i felt like bringing him home after i knew he was fed and had done what he needed. At this point they might have to arrest me becuase i have been pushed wayyyyyy beyond my limit of patience with this state and probation officers and interferring nosy vindictive family members.

so she wants a fight ...... she got it..... she has no idea how long i have been doing this and how stupid she is going to look when i bring in four files of documentation of how my mother has lied in the past to get the kids locked up and take them away from me...... much less the fact that he can not go to school unless he is here to go thursday to oreintation and since they can not offer services to help i have found someone who can and he will be seen friday afternoon for mental health. I am soo through with this. I know Dante needs help and i am trying the best i can but when people purposly try to hurt him and me and do this crap on lies I can not and WILL NOT sit here and be quiet..... so if i have to go to jail then so be it but they have PISSED me off me now!!!!!
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Old 10-20-2009, 08:15 AM
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Sorry never seems to be enough, I hope it all gets worked out. You get em MAMA
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Old 10-20-2009, 08:19 AM
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I hear ya (again..lol)-LMK how it turns out, God be with ya!
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Old 10-20-2009, 08:23 AM
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Oh my. How can "family" be so mean?!?!?!? You have to stand up for what is right for you and Dante. Don't let your mother or brother or anyone stand in your way. Go get em MAMA.
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Old 10-20-2009, 08:26 AM
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Hi Lori:
You and Dante are in our prayers today!
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Old 10-20-2009, 08:59 AM
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Lori what a mess. Praying for you both. Yea they have stretched the mama--Do what you have to do.
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Old 10-20-2009, 09:21 AM
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I'm so sorry for all you are going through. Go in there with your documentation and good reasoning but please don't get yourself
locked up. It might give you some needed rest but you're too
important to your kids. And your PWCIP friend just might have to
form that posse and do some marching.
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Old 10-20-2009, 10:37 AM
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I understand you are mad and upset but please remain calm in court so your actions aren't taken out on your son.
You can yell, scream, kick stuff to hell and back but away from those who are watching you (such as your mom). Don't show anyone how discouraged you are with all of this or they may believe you are not strong enough to take on the responsibilty of your son should they release him to you again.
I hope you don't take my reply the wrong way because I fully understand how it hurts when family turns on you. You just have to be smarter and level headed enough to turn it back around.
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Old 10-20-2009, 01:07 PM
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Hey Lori. hon I am so sorry this is happening to you...it isnt like you dont have enough to deal with. !
can you write a (nice) letter to the judge explaining this - that this time it was not right and he was set to return to school, etc etc. ?

please know you and dante are in my prayers.

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Old 10-20-2009, 02:43 PM
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Lori, your health is at risk, please calm yourself down. We care about you. When you get to the end of your rope tie a knot and hangon.
Your in my prayers........
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Old 10-20-2009, 03:26 PM
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Well it did not go well today.....
They dont want to hear anything i have to say. I took in documentation and letters from other socail workers backing what i said as well as trying to explain he had orientation for school Thursday and a Mental health eval on Friday and his PO decided to tell the judge that i am delusional and in need of her protection from my son.
So they kept him. We go back on the 26th. I am just stunned at the evil that is within the system. The judge did not care that he has school or i am seeking mental health care for him they dont care that since i am supposed to be the vicitm here and i am appearently not injured and fine Not to mention i stated i wanted him home. According the the charges my mother called this woman and claimed that my son threatened to kill me with an ice pick. First... I dont own an ice pick. second i am sitting in the court room without any injuries... third WTH?????? where did this come from. Since i am supposed to be the victim here does it not matter that I have repeated over and over this did NOT happen.
Why would dante do that? Why did my mother do this? ANd what planet is she on right now?????? The PO says that she is concerned for my safety in the home and Dante needed to be held pending trial...... HUH? concerned for my safety but i am right there uninjured and telling them this is a LIE. SO now i guess i dont know how to protect myself or when i am being threatned. However i am thinking if my son came at me with an Ice Pick i would probably remember that..... Then she goes on to say well he wont go to school...... UMMMMM he was just released last wensday from jail.... she arrestted him on Monday. There is a process to get into this school and we have doneit he is scheduled for oreintation on Thursday to begin classes but she wants to violate him for not going. He was uninrolled from the last school per her request becuase he was locked up for 30 days so what school was he supposed to be in for those three days?????
then it goes to Dante is terrorzing the house and breaking things ..... OK here we are again this is my home and i am NOT in terror nor has anything been broken. She was in my house yesterday and saw for herself nothing was broken!!!!
This is all becuase my mother called and lied and then threatened legal action if he was not removed from my home. OH and i am yelled at and told that my mother has no business calling her and it is unacceptable..... UMMMM like i can control my 65 yr old mother anymore than i can control the courts. However if she does not want the calls from my mother then maybe she should address with her and not me since i wasnt the one who did this!!!!!
I also found out that as hard as i have been fighting to get this boy into Job corp she lied and told us that he could not go becuase he is on probabtion and there is a year waiting list.... well according the specailist i just got off the phone with there is no waiting list and never has been. there is no reason why Dante could not have already been in Job Corp except he needs her permissiona nd she wont give it. I really need some help understaning why the courts think they are helping these kids when they are doing nothing but setting them up for prison by denying them opportunites that could benifit them.
I am very upset tonight and just can not even process half of this right now. I can feel the viens in neck tightening up and I dont think i have ever been this angry.
I do not understand what it is my mother is trying to prove..... she is sure not helping our relationship at all. and i dont understand when this kid is trying it seems that everyone wants to pull him down. ANd where does this PO get off thinking she is responsible for my safety??? I am a grown woman. Does she really think she is doing me a favor? the judge would not even hear me.... she cut me off and just set it for trial and took him away. she asked about the mental health eval and when i started to tell he was supposed to be there Friday she cut me off and refused to hear anything else.
When I left i ran into the attorney that represented Megan and he even told this wrong and he was there defending another kid she was doing this too. Unreal.
I am really afraid for Dante..... he is only going to continue to get more and more angry and hateful towards anyone in authority and truly this time i can not blame him.
I have spent my entire life respecting the law and teaching my kids to do the same..... tell the truth and everything will be ok... trust law enforcement they are to protect you... the courts are fair and just and we have to beleive in our system..... I think i truly have realized how much of a lie everything i have taught my kids really is.
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Last edited by meg'smom; 10-20-2009 at 03:28 PM..
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Old 10-20-2009, 03:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by meg'smom View Post
Well it did not go well today.....
They dont want to hear anything i have to say. I took in documentation and letters from other socail workers backing what i said as well as trying to explain he had orientation for school Thursday and a Mental health eval on Friday and his PO decided to tell the judge that i am delusional and in need of her protection from my son.
So they kept him. We go back on the 26th. I am just stunned at the evil that is within the system. The judge did not care that he has school or i am seeking mental health care for him they dont care that since i am supposed to be the vicitm here and i am appearently not injured and fine Not to mention i stated i wanted him home. According the the charges my mother called this woman and claimed that my son threatened to kill me with an ice pick. First... I dont own an ice pick. second i am sitting in the court room without any injuries... third WTH?????? where did this come from. Since i am supposed to be the victim here does it not matter that I have repeated over and over this did NOT happen.
Why would dante do that? Why did my mother do this? ANd what planet is she on right now?????? The PO says that she is concerned for my safety in the home and Dante needed to be held pending trial...... HUH? concerned for my safety but i am right there uninjured and telling them this is a LIE. SO now i guess i dont know how to protect myself or when i am being threatned. However i am thinking if my son came at me with an Ice Pick i would probably remember that..... Then she goes on to say well he wont go to school...... UMMMMM he was just released last wensday from jail.... she arrestted him on Monday. There is a process to get into this school and we have doneit he is scheduled for oreintation on Thursday to begin classes but she wants to violate him for not going. He was uninrolled from the last school per her request becuase he was locked up for 30 days so what school was he supposed to be in for those three days?????
then it goes to Dante is terrorzing the house and breaking things ..... OK here we are again this is my home and i am NOT in terror nor has anything been broken. She was in my house yesterday and saw for herself nothing was broken!!!!
This is all becuase my mother called and lied and then threatened legal action if he was not removed from my home. OH and i am yelled at and told that my mother has no business calling her and it is unacceptable..... UMMMM like i can control my 65 yr old mother anymore than i can control the courts. However if she does not want the calls from my mother then maybe she should address with her and not me since i wasnt the one who did this!!!!!
I also found out that as hard as i have been fighting to get this boy into Job corp she lied and told us that he could not go becuase he is on probabtion and there is a year waiting list.... well according the specailist i just got off the phone with there is no waiting list and never has been. there is no reason why Dante could not have already been in Job Corp except he needs her permissiona nd she wont give it. I really need some help understaning why the courts think they are helping these kids when they are doing nothing but setting them up for prison by denying them opportunites that could benifit them.
I am very upset tonight and just can not even process half of this right now. I can feel the viens in neck tightening up and I dont think i have ever been this angry.
I do not understand what it is my mother is trying to prove..... she is sure not helping our relationship at all. and i dont understand when this kid is trying it seems that everyone wants to pull him down. ANd where does this PO get off thinking she is responsible for my safety??? I am a grown woman. Does she really think she is doing me a favor? the judge would not even hear me.... she cut me off and just set it for trial and took him away. she asked about the mental health eval and when i started to tell he was supposed to be there Friday she cut me off and refused to hear anything else.
When I left i ran into the attorney that represented Megan and he even told this wrong and he was there defending another kid she was doing this too. Unreal.
I am really afraid for Dante..... he is only going to continue to get more and more angry and hateful towards anyone in authority and truly this time i can not blame him.
I have spent my entire life respecting the law and teaching my kids to do the same..... tell the truth and everything will be ok... trust law enforcement they are to protect you... the courts are fair and just and we have to beleive in our system..... I think i truly have realized how much of a lie everything i have taught my kids really is.
Oh Lori, I am just appalled at the out come. I thought they were supposed to be there to help our children. Obviously, to me at least, that PO, as well as the Judge, have real control issues. It is not right what they are doing.
Hang in there, and pray for the best, for them to come to their senses. Have you tried talking to your mother and getting her to recant her story?
Money for a good lawyer would help but the question many of us have is, where to get it.
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Old 10-20-2009, 04:34 PM
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Lori I don't know what to say my jaw is on the floor I just don't get it.....I think I would write a letter to that judge and tell him all the things he did'nt want to hear from you today, and then I would most diffentally be looking for a lawyer and bring charges against that P.O. (she needs a mental health eval) she does'nt want to hear from your mother but used all that your mother told her against Dante WTH plus she saw that you were not in any danger and goes ahead and does all this WHY????? was she afraid your mother would put charges against her and not think that you would'nt bring charges against her?.....OK so now you have a cop and a lawyer who thinks she has gone to far I say we all line up and biatch slap her and then do a drive by pumkin toss at her

You know that you and your children are always in my prayers (((((Hugs))))) Angel
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Old 10-20-2009, 05:08 PM
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Lori, I do not think too many of us own an ice pick, for crying out loud. i am shocked and really think they need to present evidence of these false charges your mother has presented. ugh
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Old 10-20-2009, 05:13 PM
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My offer to help supply the pumpkins is still on, especially if your mom gets her share of it all. Oh heck while we are at it lets count the PO in on it also.
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Old 10-20-2009, 05:27 PM
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I am late in reading all of this. Lori, my God, this is crazy! The drama seems to never end. Just a never ending cycle and all of this brought on by your mother lying and the po going along with it. Unreal!!! And they won't even listen to you and you're supposed to be the victim? Why don't you go see a lawyer and put a lawsuit on your mom and the po and then see how they like it? Sue the hell out of them and give them some of the stress they are giving you. Oh, well, I don't want to give you any wrong advice and then something bad happen because of it, but this just gripes me to no end. I don't have any faith in the system, either. I will never have faith in it anymore. I always grew up believing in it. I know there are some good cops and then there is the corrupt ones. It's everywhere, but I hate to see Dante mixed up in this mess. I can't believe your mom would tell these lies after as much as you've been through. Count me in on the pumpkin deal also. This is unreal that this is happening. Even Megan's lawyer knows something is wrong. Somebody should stop this as they are hurting young people having a chance to change. I'd file a lawsuit if I could somehow and give them a taste of their own medicine.
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Old 10-20-2009, 07:19 PM
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Lori, I am speechless!!!!! I usually have my say--BUT i can only say Lord help them all!!
I would roll some heads and not just pumpkin heads!!!
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Old 10-20-2009, 07:46 PM
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I cant understand how the people who you would think would be actually feeling the pain you are feeling because of their love for you and your kids can actually be the instigators of the next chapter. What a load of crap. How can somebody as empathetic and compassionate and non judgemental as you be come from a family so bitter and .... i am at a lost for an appropriate verb or though i can think of a lot of unappropriate verbs. Do not give them the satisfaction of beating you down. Rise above them hold your head high you are goodness to the core do not let down your values or sense of moral your name is Lori and I am proud to call you my friend and your children are proud to call you Mother. You have my full support and you have my hand when needed.
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Old 10-20-2009, 08:03 PM
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Gosh Lori this is so flip'n crazy. What's suppose to happen on November 5th? Will there be any chance to speak with the judge again. It is unbelieveable that the judge would not hear you out. This probation officer sounds like a real piece of work. It makes you wonder why she's on such a power trip, and so determined to side with your mom.

I think everyone here is giving you good advice, try to keep your cool, you don't need to give anyone any ammunition. At this point it sounds like all they are doing is turning everything against you, so be on your guard.
Do you think maybe Meg's lawyer would help you? Isn't it ridiculous that you have to have a lawyer intervene in order to get your voice heard. Heck and the odds are still against you.
Just keep praying, there's got to be a window of opportunity in the days ahead.
This is so crazy!!!
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Old 10-20-2009, 08:10 PM
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Lori,Iam so sorry.Iam lost for words.The system is messup. And they like doing our children wrong.I will be Praying for you and Dante.
((HUGS AND PRAYERS ARE GOING UP IN TENNESSEE))))))))))
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Old 10-20-2009, 10:09 PM
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OMG! Lori, I can't believe this! There has to be a loop hole somewhere, nobody is perfect including the po, your mom and the judge. I would ask for a copy of what went on in the courtroom and go over it word for word. I would also go to the school and get something in writing from them about when Dante's orientation was and when he was supposed to start classes. I would do the same with the mental eval., get it in writting too. Don't let up ! Get this too them ASAP! Hopefully it may get him out if you can show proof. Take to the courthouse, stamp it filed and put it in the judges mailbox. My heart goes out to you, I don't understand how a mother could do this to her child. You are her child, just as Dante is your child, yet she fails to see that. Bless your heart, I am here for you if there is anything I can do let me know okay!
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Old 10-20-2009, 10:30 PM
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Lori, This really upsets me. I just can't understand how the courts think they are helping. I will be praying for you and your whole family. I know that family members can do mean and stange things. My sister in law did this to me. I feel all your pain. I will be praying for you. Please keep us updated on what happens.
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Old 10-21-2009, 02:24 AM
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I have been up most of the night becuase i just can not sleep I m so blown away over all this. I am trying to just wait until i can calm down some before i start talking again on his behalf becuase i am soo angry i am going to make this worse if i open my mouth now.
I had a voice mail from my mother last night... She was calling to see if i was ok and find out what happened.... well she can continue to wonder as i refuse to return the call. SHe went on to tell me in the voice mail that maybe this is for the best and this way Dante can get the much needed help he needs. I am simply stunned. Our relationship has always been strained even from childhood.... I grew up with my Grandmother becuase she left for a long and took my brothers with her. I have known most of life she never wanted me and came to accept that but after i had my children it was important to me for them to know thier grandma and by then she had been on medication and mellowed with age so to speak... I really should not be so surprised so did this.
I truly have no words for his P O and this system. I talked to Dante last night and he is just at a loss and I can pretty much garuntee he will never speak to his grandmother again. you know it is sad when he is telling me dont worry mom i will be 18 in a few months and then they can not mess with me.
I dont know what the other attorney (Meg's) can do or not do at this point. Right now i am still far to angry to think rational and I am trying to just calm down down so i can think legally here instead of revengfully. I am angry at the courts but i am furious with my family and I have to calm down and not react to them or i will complicate this and i know this.
this is all just such a mess. In the next 5 days i am going to see what i can research about the laws here and what i can use to help him then i have no idea what to do about this other crap she started that he goes to court on the 5th. if they still have him locked up i can not take him to another county for court and i suppose he will get violated for that too. I am just so ready to to throw my hands up but anyone who really knows me ... knows that wont happened...lol I dont give up that easy i just get more angry.
well the silver lining to this black cloud...... i now have plenty of reasons to get rid of the rotten pumpkins this month...... my christmas list has now just gotten considerably shorter this year( think of all the money i will save)..... and i dont have to worry about cooking on the holidays this year for anyone other than me and the dog.
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Old 10-21-2009, 04:09 AM
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Oh. My. God. That judge makes me think of the lady judge my daughter had gone before. Bitch Woman From Hell doesn't even begin to describe that freak. My daughter is and has always been a thin person. Judge took one look at her and said "You are so thin. Are you hooked on meth? I'm going to order a drug test!" Holy God Lady...just because someone isn't severly overweight does not mean they are doing drugs!

But enough of that...the judge Dante saw is an A$$HOLE. I can not figure out why she chose to deny Dante an education and mental health treatment. My hope for that judge is that she gets a monster case of diahreah in the middle of the night and she is out of toilet paper and all the stores are closed. Plus the water to her house gets shut off so she can't even flush the crap away...it just builds up getting stinkier by the moment.
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Old 10-21-2009, 04:43 AM
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Lori,

I feel so sad for you. I am so sorry you have to endure such pain in your heart its hard enough when you have a child that is in trouble and you are doing everything possible to help him or her then to have family members stick there nose in where it does not belong and make up lies.. all for what? it just seems so unreal to me this could actually be happening.And the court system and everyone else involved.. It just stuns me. I want to use the word "misunderstood" by the courts and everyone else involved, but not so sure that is what it is. It does seem as if they are against you and your son by the way everything was handled, then and now. Are you in any kind of counceling? If not, maybe you should go for counceling yourself, they can document everything and maybe do a bit of a background check on your Mom prooving she is the one that is unstable. Is there any time anything like this has happened in the past (maybe not the ice pick part) but the broken things in the home and so forth that your mom is maybe having flashbacks about and believes its really happening again? and adding things to what happened as if she has a fear it will and thinks it did when it really didn't? (did any of that make sense?) I want to believe that some one, some where will be able to help you in this particular case..You have to prove to them that you both were doing fine and just waiting, as we all do for the school system to do there thing and it sometimes takes a month or so to get into couceling, at least around here it does..If you have proof I don't see why they would deny you the chance to show them the documents and actually listen to what you are saying. I truly think if it was me I would be (as hard as it will be and costly too, but it wouldn't matter...) pressing false charges against the people that did this. He was accused of something that he never did and you and your son are the victims of the false charges that never accured. That's just my opinion. Seriously I would get anyone and everyone that is willing to testify against these people...neighbors that may have seen the two of you in those few days, did they notice anything that seemed like you were in danger..was your mother around at anytime then, did they see her there to witness what she claims has happened ?..did you and your son seem to be getting along just fine..you know what I mean? It just urks me to think the justice system is so corrupt ! Who has custody of your son? You or your Mother? why are Your Rights as a mother And His being denied...those are questions that need answers in my eyes.......its just wrong!
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