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BuffsBaby · #**151** 09-20-2007, 11:39 AM

I tell my co workers that he is out of town when they ask i say chesapeake, the city where his prison is at. I usually avoid conversations about relationships because i dont like lying and one day i am gonna come out and say it

ahargis_1999 · #**152** 09-20-2007, 11:46 AM

I once told a co worker that he died. we were going through a rough time!!!!

krainium · #**153** 09-20-2007, 07:50 PM

I don't lie to my co-workers but I don't volunteer any info. When they ask how's your husband and the kids, I say fine. If they ask how he's doing specifically I say he's fine- because he is. Everything isn't for everybody.

str8 · #**154** 09-22-2007, 05:41 PM

i couldnt lie if i wanted to, i live in a smalltown, and his ex's cousin works at my job. not that i care. hell, when they arrested him, the news made it back to my job before he made it to book in.... now everyone just says "how long he's got?" i get asked that at least 3 times a week, and i just say 2 days shorter than the last time you asked me.. then they ask " and you aint got a new man yet" or "you GONNA WAIT????" AND IM LIKE UM, YEAH...

muddswhyfee1 · #**155** 09-22-2007, 11:05 PM

When he first went I wasn't working but when I went back to work I started getting close with my boss and we became two peas in a pod I told her he was out of town and I felt bad because we had a bond, I finally broke down and told her, and she understood,even though we no longer work at that company, we are BFF'S now she knows the majority of my family and she also knows and speaks to my husband via phone. When I started working for another place I also didnt tell where he was I just said he stayed out of town alot, only 2 persons there knew the truth and this was a big corporation,when ever I was invited to functions I would'nt go or just avoid people altogether,but this aint living, I no longer work in that part of the district, I work in another part, and when co workers ask I'm no longer ashamed to say I just say he's on a "State Funded Vacation"
and they laugh or give me pitty which I truly hate. God doesnt want us as Christians walking around looking and being defeated, so I just think of this as one of his many test, my husband and myself have to indure. And I know we will shine together through it. GOD BLESS

Tashi_1982 · #**156** 09-22-2007, 11:57 PM

I personally don't see it as lying I just never told them where he is and they assume he isn't incarcerated, because I go to see him a lot! Not that I am ashamed of him! It's just nobody's business! A few of my close so workers know he is serving time, however most do not know and I don't care to share!

PTO-92958 · #**157** 09-23-2007, 12:26 AM

I now hold a new supervisory position at the school I was working at for the last 2 months of last year, and I still have no inclination to be deceptive or ashamed of my fiancee's location and why he is there. Our picture is proudly displayed upon my desk, as is the pic of our blended family together.
If I portray an aura of shame around me/us, then shame surrounds us. We/I have nothing to be ashamed of. I am truly proud of my man and who he is/ what he stands for.
I work with many individuals who should certainly feel some sort of shame for how they're living. Not me. We're doing the right thing and always have been.
The co-workers that I feel close enough with to share our story feel strongly for us as well. The rest may think what they wish...who cares? They don't walk in my shoes.(or sign my check) If the district isn't "offended" ...f*** the others who are. JMHO

The Jailer Wife · #**158** 09-23-2007, 02:48 PM

I haven't lied about it, but I don't bring it up in conversation with my co-workers. Only co-workers that are close to me and I really trust know my situation. I dont like to speak about my business about my husband to my other co workers , because alot of them have there husbands here with them and they all speak so highly about them. So I pretty much dont respond when they are talking about there husbands.Only on certain things that I know I can relate to with them.

str8 · #**159** 09-23-2007, 02:55 PM

hell, half the women at my job either got crazy ass husbands, cheat on thier husbands or are just miserable for the sake of being miserable... hell, my bae may be locked down but im still happy

holdinbxinfl · #**160** 09-23-2007, 05:51 PM

I have to say yes, I have lied about where my man is simply because people are very negative about people in jail.

LuckyCharm107 · #**161** 09-24-2007, 02:12 AM

I used to tell my co-workers about my bf being in prison but i was judged for it so I don't tell anyone about my business anymore unless I know that they're not judgemental. Just because someone is in prison doesn't mean they're a bad person and just because u're waiting for ur man doesn't mean u're stupid. I think that's what most people would think but don't let anyone bring you down. I give props to women who are waiting on their men because they are loyal, dedicated and strong. Any woman can walk away when her bf/ husband is incarcerated but it takes a real woman to wait and be supportive of him.

SexyChef1 · #**162** 09-24-2007, 09:14 AM

Yep I sure did...but as soon as I did it I realized I didnt owe them an explaination or lie about my man and I told them the real deal. I should have said none of your business.

danielle27 · #**163** 09-26-2007, 09:51 PM

No. What is is....he's in prison and I'm not going to lie about that. I don't have to give details and I don't have to tell them where he is in the first place. If they ask why I'm never with my boyfriend, it's cuz he's gone right now.

be easy · #**164** 09-27-2007, 09:37 PM

sad to say I do lie. I just dont want them all up in my business. the ppl that need to know knows.

L93117N · #**165** 09-27-2007, 09:54 PM

I don't tell my co workers anything because I don't want them to judge me, I work for a family owned, wealthy company. I just tell them he works at the job he had when he was out. My friends all know and his family. My mom doesn't even know, she would talk so much s***!!

HisWifey7707 · #**166** 09-28-2007, 12:24 PM

It all depends on who asks. For some people it's a need to know basis. But for the most part everyone knows!

nikka · #**167** 09-28-2007, 12:39 PM

im not going to lie to yall on pto........only 3 people know where he is. i did not even tell my sister. every1 else think hes home. i even lie and when i am going to visit him i tell them (my homegirls) we going out to dinner or to spend sme quality time with each other. its not that i am embarrassed (well i am a little) but the main reason is i do not want ppl all up in my business. i do not want ppl to start judging me. society judge prisoners already-- i dnt want hear it frm ppl if i can avoid it.

mamalovespapa · #**168** 09-28-2007, 12:47 PM

I've never been in a position where telling the truth would affect my employment. I work in a position where we are all close and most have friendships outside of the workplace... which is great for me cuz I can't lie to save my life!

mamiosa · #**169** 09-28-2007, 12:50 PM

I used to. Then I realized if I even told one person, it got around the office. So now I'm up front. I brought it up at staff meeting at my new job. It was amazing because it turned out that people had brothers, sons, nephews and sisters in prison and had been to scared to talk about it. The other thing is I am hardworking, pay my bills, well-liked, my kid gets straight A's and people are shocked to find out I am married to a "criminal" I hope I have opened a few minds. It's hard, I get looks when some people find out. Most people say I had no idea!! you talk about him like he is in your life. I explain he IS in my life, visits, letters and in my heart 24/7.

mrsdjones · #**170** 09-29-2007, 10:08 AM

Nope! My co-workers all know he's locked up!

mrs.tate02 · #**171** 10-01-2007, 01:14 PM

NEVER WOULD I BE ASHAMED OF MY STINK OR WHERE U AT...

I LOVE MY BOI AND HE WHERE HE AT BECAUSE HE WAS DOIN WAT HE HAD 2 DO TO TAKE CARE OF US AND A NUT AZZ NIGGA WAS SNITCHING ON HIM...

I LOVE MY BOI AND HE A RIDA SO I HAVE NO CHOICE BUT 2 RIDE!

POsOldlady · #**172** 10-01-2007, 01:30 PM

I can't lie...he worked for one of the owners of my company's son. Thank God our honest communication has brought lots of support and respect. He will be coming home in 30-40 days if all goes well at the treatment facility and the judge reinstates his probation....and coming back to his JOB as the owner of the company told me today at lunch they need him so they didn't replace him. He is a hard worker and just about the only one on the crew that has the upper body strenghth to pull the lines through the manholes. (construction)

GothicPrincess · #**173** 10-01-2007, 01:52 PM

Nope, everybody knows! Friends/family/Co-workers/Fellow students....
Ive never had one judgemental comment yet! infact they always ask how he's doing.

Even "if" they did have comments, id take it with a grain of salt. Im a grown woman and quite capable of making my own decisions of whom i want to be with, no matter where he resides! So the comments would be water of a ducks back to me!

Couldn't care less if they judged me or not! I aint gunna lose sleep over it! Everyones' entitled to their own opinion...it's not going to be everyones' cup of tea this kind of relationship!

But im lucky, ive got some fantastic friends

cromeswife · #**174** 02-19-2008, 04:00 AM

i have to admit , my coworkers believe my husband at home where he is suppose to be , but i keep that information to myself , i dont want anyone to judge him because he is in prison

PookieJude · #**175** 02-19-2008, 11:08 AM

Since he's not my husband anymore, no. Basically years ago, I didn't address any of it with co-workers...at all. I kept it all to myself. Wish PTO was around then, I'd have had an outlet.