RECEPTION- Questions & Answers

[mickeynminnie]

When my brother got send back he went straight to where they told him n no he didn't had to go back and do reception since they have already done that

[JLP]

Originally Posted by Chris' Lady

3:30am Right now. I received a call from my man, "they're taking me. I'm leaving"

The cop was nice enough to let him use the phone right before he gets on the bus.

At least we got to say our last I love yous and good bye but I'm torn right now. The dreaded reception time has arrived, which means NO phone calls. Communication by letters only begins. My hands won't stop shaking.. I'm a mess right now. Doubt I will get any sleep for the rest of this night.. My heart has never felt so much pain in my life.

How did you ladies survive reception? I keep reading how they hold them there now for an extended period of time. How long was your man in there?

My man was transferred to Wasco from OC on 2/29 so I totally feel your pain! The mail from them to us has been quick so far, usually three days or so. I got my first letter 6 days after he got there. To get to him though, it's been taking over 8 days pretty lame. I have been losing it not being able to talk to him, I'm constantly up and down....I go from being okay and fine and busy one minute to a total basket case the next. I am just trying to write write WRITE, I'm hoping spending so much time doing that will make things a little easier! My boo has been sending something every other day or so too it seems, so getting mail has been making things much better! Hang in there girl, once we make it over this hump things will be much better!

[Frog88]

Got my two first letters from him couple days ago! It took almost a week!

I sent him about 8 letters already. I hope it doesn't take forever to get to him. I cannot wait until I can talk to him on a visit even though it's through a window.

His letters made me cry! Made me sad and happy at once. This is the hardest thing ever.

[JLP]

Originally Posted by Chris' Lady

Got my two first letters from him couple days ago! It took almost a week!

I sent him about 8 letters already. I hope it doesn't take forever to get to him. I cannot wait until I can talk to him on a visit even though it's through a window.

His letters made me cry! Made me sad and happy at once. This is the hardest thing ever.

I know that!! This is driving me crazy...I keep trying to remind myself that after this, things are going to be SOOOO much better, but it's hard how much time does your man have? Did you send in your visitation form yet? J saw one of his co-defendants the other day and he told him that they dropped him down a level randomly, and he said the same thing happened with one of his celly's too...there's a lot going on at Wasco, I don't know what the deal is but just something to keep your ears open for! I fly down to OC to visit, so maybe once we are both approved we can ride up together if you'd like, I think J's going to be stuck there awhile unfortunately either way, this part of the journey seems to be one of the more difficult - if you ever need to talk or vent or whine or cry, I'm here have a good weekend girl!

Sent from my iPhone using PrisonTalk

[JLP]

Originally Posted by lillybear7

Hey Chris' Lady! My man is also in reception at Wasco...since novermber i have not heard his voice other than the two visits that were 1 hour and behind glass. Its hard but stay strong, he needs to you to be strong I got approved in february so i didnt have to wait as long as i was expecting. Ive heard he can be in reception as long as 7 months so thats a scary thought(no calls) but i write as many letters as possible and my man does the same. Im here to talk if you need me! how long is your man in for?

Lilly, did it take three months for you to get approved for visiting???

Sent from my iPhone using PrisonTalk

[sidewalker]

Ok I will either make you feel better, or worse.
Letters took FOREVER in reception. (mostly mine to him)
While he was in county, I went to visit at least twice a week (or at least tried to...but got bumped a few times)
Once he got to reception, I managed to get three appts over a 13 month period.
Yeah. one year, one month.
No phones in that time period.

So once he went mainline???
Hoot!
A freaking phone call?? awesome!

Hang in. YOu will both make it thru. You will.
yeah, its not easy. But try putting your thoughts, questions, etc...down on paper.
It helps.

Im sorry guys. I think this may sound crass, but you WILL get thru it, and so will he.

[dougiesb]

Well, things r getting a little better. Letter that I sent last Monday, he received, and I got his answer back on Friday-all in 5 days (he’s in San Quentin)…that’s got to be a miracle. Keep exercising that patience ladies, the letters will start arriving, & they’ll be getting yours, too. Yes, this waiting game is the worst. This isn’t the first bid for us. I’ve done this once before-told him this better be the last. I love him & can’t imagine life without him. It’s a true test of one’s sanity. Stay strong & come to PTO in those weak moments. Thank you all for sharing your stories. I think we all know how comforting it is to know others really do understand. Take care everyone!

[Frog88]

JLP - yes! It's true hell! I did send in the visiting form yesterday. I got two letters from him on Thursday, one of them had the form so I sent it out first this the next morning. I hoot I get approved soon. Where do you stand with visiting? Approved? If so, how long did it take? And yes, absolutely! Saving has costs is great, so in defnetly open to carpooling.
Speaking of letter.. On one part of the letter he tells me he counted his points and he has 30 - level 3, but mentioned that they might bump him down to a level 2 because of the over crowding on lvl 3 and since he is on the lower end of the scale.. I don't know how reliable is the source he heard that from, but I did ask.. Considering he probably won't get my mail for another 2 weeks, I won't know what up for a while (snail mail ).
He was sentenced to 4 years for (I think) 80 percent or 85. We didn't hear what the judge said but will find out soon I'm sure.. Should be just under 3 years..long 3 years.

[Frog88]

Dougiesb - is he in reception?! Wow answering back and forth in 5 days? That is a miracle!

I can't wait to get his reply to my letters, just to know he's receiving them. I sent a post card too in hopes it gets there quicker. Just to let him know more letters are on the way..

Keeping faith and taking it day by day. That is all I can do right now.

[countryzgirl]

Ugh. Reception. Here's some optimistic news: my man was only in reception for about 2 months (in 2011) and I was approved to visit in 2 weeks. Reception sucked but it was manageable. You'll adjust, get into a new routine and make it through. Hang in there!

[dougiesb]

Originally Posted by Chris' Lady

Dougiesb - is he in reception?! Wow answering back and forth in 5 days? That is a miracle!

I can't wait to get his reply to my letters, just to know he's receiving them. I sent a post card too in hopes it gets there quicker. Just to let him know more letters are on the way..

Keeping faith and taking it day by day. That is all I can do right now.

Hi Chris' Lady- yes, he's in reception at San Quentin-since mid Oct-almost 6mos. I'm shocked at how fast mail has gotten. Mailed a funny card & couple of poems on Mon(3/26). Got mail from him today, Fri.(3/30), laughing at the card. Definitely a miracle. At first, he said big manilla envelopes get to them quicker(maybe b/c they don't get mixed w/all the smaller envelopes), and he's always gotten those within a week. I send one every 3 or 4 days, with 8-10 pages of poems, song lyrics, jokes, pictures-stamps, paper, pens, envelopes when he needs them-of course, a little something personal from me...things to help him feel a little bit like he's back at home, and try to keep him entertained.lol. You may want to try that & see if it helps. I get his letters in 1-2 days, luckily that's not a problem-I live about 45mins. from SQ, so I'm sure it also helps being close. Now if they'd get him to mainline-phone calls & get visits back-CONTACT visits. Haven't heard his voice in 2mos. or felt his touch for 1yr(Apr.2). This sucks!!! Keep telling yourself, "This won't last forever, it WILL get better," I do it every day. Sorry for rambling, but it's nice to have someone who cares about this stuff. Stay strong, practice patience(not always easy)& I hope this all gets better for you-for all of us-VERY soon!

[Frog88]

I agree. I tell myself that every day every night. Meanwhile I feed on his letters. Wow.. You're very close to the prison. That's really good for letters and visits. Oh I actually did send him 2 Manila envelops with paper, envelops and stamps. Wait, we can send pens to?? I didn't think we can do that. I hope he gets it sooner than later because he told me he had to ask someone there for an envelope to send me my last letter. And weird because I heard those take longer being that they had to go over every sheet of paper to check it. I guess it varies.. Its been a week and a day since my first letter went out to him. I wonder if he got it already..
Anyways, I hope it all goes well for the both of us. Continue to keep faith, do lots of writing and pray it all works out one way or another.

[dougiesb]

Originally Posted by Chris' Lady

I agree. I tell myself that every day every night. Meanwhile I feed on his letters. Wow.. You're very close to the prison. That's really good for letters and visits. Oh I actually did send him 2 Manila envelops with paper, envelops and stamps. Wait, we can send pens to?? I didn't think we can do that. I hope he gets it sooner than later because he told me he had to ask someone there for an envelope to send me my last letter. And weird because I heard those take longer being that they had to go over every sheet of paper to check it. I guess it varies.. Its been a week and a day since my first letter went out to him. I wonder if he got it already..
Anyways, I hope it all goes well for the both of us. Continue to keep faith, do lots of writing and pray it all works out one way or another.

Call the prison first on the pens, to be sure--here, we can send 2 at a time, black or blue ink only & the outter casing that you hold onto, must to be clear. It does help having him close--we still has 5 years to go, so I'm praying they'll keep him where he's is. SQ is a level 2/3 prison-he's a 3. They say they closed the reception center w/AB109 changes-however, he sits in reception(that they no longer have), on 24hr lockdown, 2 showers a week if he's lucky, no phone calls, no visits, no yard, no chow-hall, no canteen--go figure. Good ol' CDC-and that R at the end for Rehabilitation, is a joke-unless they're making changes & actually including it now-I'll believe it when I see it. How far are you from where your man is? If he hasn't gotten your mail yet, it should reach him any day. You could try calling the prison & have them connect you or see if there's a number to call mailroom directly & ask how far behind their mail is running-should even be able to tell you what postmark date they're on, and ask how long it takes for inmate's mail to go out once CO picks it up.
Keep praying for mainline-that's when things should settle down and become more routine-with phone calls, possibly 6-7hr contact visits, quarterly packages-time will begin to roll along quite a bit faster. Hope I've been some help to you-this can definitely be a long, lonely road. Pm me anytime. One thing I can assure you of...if you do see this thru, you'll find a much stronger woman at the other end...surely a much stronger relationship, as well. Thank you for well wishes, and same to you. Take Care, Stay Strong & God Bless. "Thank God, I Am Strong Enough!"

[Frog88]

Yep, I will definitely call to ask about that. Last letters he said he has a crappy pen, so it's worth checking.
My godness! Your hubby is not living even under half way humane standards. 24 hours, no shower, no yard. Talk about cruel and unusual punishment.. Have you complained to someone? (as if anyone cares..) I never thought this was a rehabilitating system. This is my LO second bid. I know him before his last but didn't become a couple until after. He still has his prison moments even when he was out in the real world. I learned quickly also how to approach him while he's asleep even if just to kiss him.. That was a big no no in the beginning. Rehabilitation my as....
Good idea about the mail too! I didn't know I could ask then these questions so I'll check it out.
I also believe that if we can get through this, NOTHING can break us. I read of women on here that have been waiting for years. It's breaks my heart but at the same time.. Wow! It Say no, don't care to even shake your hand. To me, your not my brother. Don't care anything about u. Don't talk to me, nothing!gives a whole new meaning to love and commitment.
Much love and prayers!

[JLP]

Originally Posted by Chris' Lady

JLP - yes! It's true hell! I did send in the visiting form yesterday. I got two letters from him on Thursday, one of them had the form so I sent it out first this the next morning. I hoot I get approved soon. Where do you stand with visiting? Approved? If so, how long did it take? And yes, absolutely! Saving has costs is great, so in defnetly open to carpooling.
Speaking of letter.. On one part of the letter he tells me he counted his points and he has 30 - level 3, but mentioned that they might bump him down to a level 2 because of the over crowding on lvl 3 and since he is on the lower end of the scale.. I don't know how reliable is the source he heard that from, but I did ask.. Considering he probably won't get my mail for another 2 weeks, I won't know what up for a while (snail mail ).
He was sentenced to 4 years for (I think) 80 percent or 85. We didn't hear what the judge said but will find out soon I'm sure.. Should be just under 3 years..long 3 years.

I haven't gotten approved yet for visiting, still waiting (SUPER impatiently lol) to hear back about that! I don't know what the deal is with their levels, J has something stupid like 70 or 80 points (from previous bids, back when he was a trouble maker), he is hoping to get bumped down to three but I told him not to hold his breath! I am curious as to why they are doing that, if it has to do with housing them in Wasco, or being able to find them a spot to main line. If it's more for the purpose of housing at Wasco, I wonder if they will put them back to where they are supposed to be when they get transferred, or if they get to stay at their new level (assuming they stay out of trouble.) I will have J's mom talk to his co-defendant's (who was moved from level 4 to 3) family to see if they know anymore about it.....who knows!! It's always something it seems...I will just be happy when a sister can get a phone call again!! I am seriously dying not hearing from him.

Sent from my iPhone using PrisonTalk

[dougiesb]

Originally Posted by Chris' Lady

Yep, I will definitely call to ask about that. Last letters he said he has a crappy pen, so it's worth checking.
My godness! Your hubby is not living even under half way humane standards. 24 hours, no shower, no yard. Talk about cruel and unusual punishment.. Have you complained to someone? (as if anyone cares..) I never thought this was a rehabilitating system. This is my LO second bid. I know him before his last but didn't become a couple until after. He still has his prison moments even when he was out in the real world. I learned quickly also how to approach him while he's asleep even if just to kiss him.. That was a big no no in the beginning. Rehabilitation my as....
Good idea about the mail too! I didn't know I could ask then these questions so I'll check it out.
I also believe that if we can get through this, NOTHING can break us. I read of women on here that have been waiting for years. It's breaks my heart but at the same time.. Wow! It Say no, don't care to even shake your hand. To me, your not my brother. Don't care anything about u. Don't talk to me, nothing!gives a whole new meaning to love and commitment.
Much love and prayers!

Hopefully you'll get a yes on the pens, especially since he really does need one. You're right, the living conditions in SQ recpt aren't fit for animals, let alone humans-I don't know how those men do it. No wonder so many of them come out more angry and bitter than when they went in. Makes our complaints out here seem so trivial. I've made a couple of calls, but gotten no real answers, mostly "We'll look into it." When? I don't usually like to be annoying or to "make waves," but for the love of my husband, I'm not left with many other options-being nice doesn't seem to get anyone to listen. This is his 2nd term since we've been together, plus he has 2 others before "us". I have watched him make so much progress in the 8yrs we've been together, it breaks my heart to see how difficult it has been for him to shake some of those demons on his own-hence my "rehab" comment. CDC hasn't been much help in that dept. I've also had to learn that lesson on how to approach him when he's sleeping-gently, but also be ready to duck out of the way. It's sad how much follows them home. Can they ever truly feel at peace? Don't know for sure if the mail-room will have answers that will help you, but it's sure worth a try. Hope you reach someone who does actually care and is willing to help. As hard as this time is, the reward from the love and commitment we share, by far outweighs everything else-I hope the same for you and your man, as well as all of the other wonderful souls that make up PTO. Praying for Mainline. Love & prayers back to you...Thank God We Are Strong Enough!

[dougiesb]

[quote=JLP;6681491]I haven't gotten approved yet for visiting, still waiting (SUPER impatiently lol) to hear back about that! I don't know what the deal is with their levels, J has something stupid like 70 or 80 points (from previous bids, back when he was a trouble maker), he is hoping to get bumped down to three but I told him not to hold his breath! I am curious as to why they are doing that, if it has to do with housing them in Wasco, or being able to find them a spot to main line. If it's more for the purpose of housing at Wasco, I wonder if they will put them back to where they are supposed to be when they get transferred, or if they get to stay at their new level (assuming they stay out of trouble.) I will have J's mom talk to his co-defendant's (who was moved from level 4 to 3) family to see if they know anymore about it.....who knows!! It's always something it seems...I will just be happy when a sister can get a phone call again!! I am seriously dying not hearing from him.


This worked for me at San Quentin a few months ago. Assuming you need an appt. to visit your LO in reception--I knew there was nothing on my record, and I had been approved at SQ a few years ago--approx. 3-4 weeks after returning my application, I called to try to schedule a visit, as if I had already been approved. Once I had someone on the line, I explained that I know it takes time, but I had returned my application several weeks before, and had been approved at SQ in the past, and thought maybe the past approval could still be valid-was there any possible way she could look into that for me. They say they can't give approval or denial over the phone, but she was nice enough to say, yes, I was approved, and let me schedule a visit. It was nearly a week later that I got the approval notice from my husband. I was surprised & very thankful for her help. What the heck, can't hurt to try. I know what you mean about the phone calls-this sister hasn't gotten one since mid-Oct, when they transferred him from county to reception. And no visits since early Feb. due to riot. I just keep praying for mainline. Good Luck.

[Frog88]

JLP - 70-80?? Oh wow.. Bad boy. Lol that's a lot though.. From what Chris tells me, they are lowering only because level 3 is so freakin crowded. I hope for his sake also that they lower him, but mine has been in level 3 and 4 prisons on his last prison bid so I wouldn't count on it either.
I was told this (reception) is the hardest part, and once they are mainlined it is a bit easier being that we get calls and visits.. I hope that's the case, even though am sure that won't be easy either. Ugh! In waiting on a damn call too! This is torturous!
I hope our visiting forms get approved ASAP!

[Frog88]

Dougieb - while reading on pto, I came across a couple posts stating that they don't take phone calls to serious, but I'd you write a letter stating facts, etc then there's a better chance of getting ish done. Idk how true that is, I just feel like we are the only ones that can and are willing to fight for our man. Do for them what they can't do for them self.
Lol that's exactly how I had to approach him also.. Got me some time to get used to his habits too. I remember one time I was playin around and did a gun sign with my hand and pointed it at him. Whoa! That did not fly with him either. He also has improved a lot in the last couple years, but I think prison will always and forever be imbedded in them. It's just so painful that once things begin to change and get better, next thing you know they're back in there ad then have to start all over again.

Much love!

[dougiesb]

Hi Chris' Lady, or should I say good morning. True, phone calls probably don't do much, I've had some success as well. Few yrs ago, parole tried to violate him, & he did spend almost 2mos. at SQ-he saw commissioner(?) who told him, "Go home, and continue Anger Mgmt. classes"-3wks later, still not released. Called his couselor on a Fri, she said he'd be out that evening after count. Van came to gate, but he wasn't in it. Left many msgs that weekend on couselors vm as well as her sprvsr. That Mon. morn I rcvd calls from both counselor & supvr, apologizing & assured me of his release that evening, and when the van drove up to gate, he got out. He was shocked-THEY actually called ME-yes, that's rare. He asked how I did it, I said I had go a little bitch on them-that's where dougiesb came from-dougies bitch. He said that's my official nickname-and yes, I wear it proudly.lol. Going to try counselor on Mon to ask why he's still in recpt-which they say is closed-after nearly 6mos. Very possible I'll start letter writing soon. Yes, part of why I do this, is to be his voice out here b/c no one will listen in there. May not always do any good, but I feel better for trying & he def shows his appreciation and love for me. Bottom line, it's about doing this bid with him-trying my best to help him get thru it. One thing that stays with him always--b/c it reminds him of handcuffs, he can't wear a watch-makes him nuts. Yes, you're so right about just when life is good, in the blink of an eye, it can all go bad. How to keep them away from that revolving door--I'm still trying to master that one. It's just too quiet without him here. God I miss him. Peace & Love to you and your man. And remember, they can't keep him forever-this nightmare will end.

[candy74]

Originally Posted by lillybear7

damn those levels can take up to a year?? i had no idea!! my man is a level 3 and has been in reception since nov '11

Awww so had my man my poor love Aaron ....I still haven't spoke to him ...since November ...has ur man gotten transferred

[femmefatale76]

Just curious?? And I'm in California

forever&always

[SimplyMe123]

Hi there! I'm moving your thread to the California forum so you can get the answers you need.

[SteveAlton]

Originally Posted by femmefatale76

Can You Have A Job In Reception?

Not a pay number.....But he can get a job in the kitchen, to maybe get a little extra food, goodies etc....He can use the food to trade for other needs....

Alot of guys in reception have NOTHING, and those who do generally need to hold on to what they got....COFFEE IS LIKE GOLD.....There is a lot of artists doing drawings, cards etc.....They do pretty well......

Reception is rough.....But it's rougher on the family who is struggling because of their spouses choices....

[eroro1608]

You can have a job in reception. My man is in reception and he has a job-he normally wouldn't be able to call me but since he does have a job he can. He's reception tho'. He says it helps too or else he would probably be going ape shit right about now