Notice to new members intending to register - from January 9th 2012

MattsAngelGirl · #1 12-30-2005, 10:39 AM

I've been regretting to post in this forum but I realized that there is no need to keep prolonging the inevitable. I knew that when Matt started having the other girl come and visit him that it was the beginning of the end but still I had hope. It started with the visits then progressed to him not calling me at all when he said that he was going to, and then to him only talking to me for a few minutes when he actually did call. The 2nd week in November he had called and we got into a disagreement and I had asked him if he still wanted me to visit him that evening (I was getting ready to walk out the door when he called) because I refuse to visit him when he's upset because of something I won't do for him, I'd rather just stay at home if he wants to fight. He ended the conversation with "F*** you" and hung up. I, of course didn't visit him and then a couple hours later he calls and tells me that I am never coming to visit him again. I thought that it would all blow over because he was coming down with something and wasn't feeling good. It took me 3 weeks to work up the courage to try to visit him and when I got in the visiting room the CO told that he refused the visit. (I just laughed when she told me that and walked right back out the door.)
So then I get a letter from him saying that basically he had taken me off of his visiting list as his significant other but if I do something for him, he will give me my visits back. Yeah RIGHT!!! He was extremely hateful in the letter saying that basically that he only "loved" me for what he thought that I could give him. So I wrote him back saying that I REFUSE to be anyone's mule and that I hope the new girl can give him everything that I couldn't and that I wished both of them the best that they can have (under the circumstances), and thanked him for all the memories that I have of him. But most of all I thanked him for making this one of the EASIEST decisions I have ever made in my life. I was in this "relationship" to be there for him and I had no problem waiting 19 years of my life for him to get out, but apparently there are other things that are more important for him besides someone sticking by him.
The weird thing is is that I find myself loving this man more and more each day. I laughed everytime he was sent to the hole or gotten in trouble. Everyone else would be upset with their man if that happened, but I KNEW Matt, I understood every reason behind the things that he does, and I can't hate him for what he has done to me. I've taken it as a learning expierence and I take pride in myself more today than I did when I first met him. I still love this man with all of my heart, and I believe that everything happens for a reason.... I'm just looking forward to what the future holds for me now.
So now I have made it official in letting my "family" know and now I'm off to the new chapter in my life.
Thanks guys!!!

COMPLETElyhis · #2 12-30-2005, 10:44 AM

Wow...

The bottom line is the bottom line...YOU have to take care of YOU---FIRST!

This too shall pass...

Peace and blessings...

BrandsGApeach · #3 12-30-2005, 10:54 AM

You deserve better! You did the right thing, I think!

Good for you for standing up for yourself! You have to take care of you!

flygirlaa2 · #4 12-30-2005, 11:48 AM

No man is worth risking your freedom. Stay strong and you will find someone better.

hooddiva · #5 12-30-2005, 04:38 PM

You did what you had to do you don't deserve to be treated like that

California Sunshine · #6 12-30-2005, 04:45 PM

Wow good post as it portrays your strength! I am verry sorry you are here and that the man you love seems to only need you when you can do something for him (I know this all to well trust me) but I am proud of you also for having the grace and dignity that you do in dealing with all of this.

(((HUGS)))

AmyLynn · #7 12-30-2005, 05:01 PM

It is good that you are standing up for yourself and not giving in to what he wants. I wish you nothing but the best!!!!!

LadyMel2626 · #8 12-30-2005, 05:14 PM

yeah i feel what u said its hard to admit that the man u love is gone believe me right now i truly feel your pain

lftb6514 · #9 12-30-2005, 05:33 PM

Just how long did you stand by him?
You deserve a couple dozen roses!
LeA

LovingYou · #10 12-30-2005, 05:59 PM

Good for you. Love comes with no conditions. You can still enjoy the memories you guys had and it's great to hear that you moved on. Happy New Year!

JustTami · #11 12-30-2005, 06:04 PM

Good job. You do deserve more and I commend you for letting him go.

jada11 · #12 12-31-2005, 12:40 AM

I'm sorry that you `are having to deal with this. You will be okay, life get's better...

Jada11

pritybrown · #13 12-31-2005, 01:01 AM

I am so glad that is over....he is very ungrateful and takes people for granted. He is going to get a rude awakening thur out his bid. Good Luck to you and your new promising future!!

RachelKaren · #14 12-31-2005, 02:32 AM

I'm sorry that this happened but I was blown away by your post. You have handled it with a strength and grace that amazes me. Thankyou for your inspiring (sp) post and good luck. Its obvious that there are better things ahead of you

polar670 · #15 12-31-2005, 09:36 AM

I am so pleased that you seem confident with the choice you made. Sometimes uncertainty can make a difficult decision that much more difficult. I knew when it was time to get out and I was angry that it had to be that way, but I could find no other solution, but I found much peace in the certainty that it was the right thing to do. Good for you and hang in there. There is a wonderful future waiting for you.

jeroid's gal · #16 12-31-2005, 05:02 PM

I am so happy to hear this story!!! You are a very brave and strong woman, and I really do admire that in you! I've had this problem in the past with a few exes. That's right I said a FEW, meaning more than one. And when I did what you did, it felt so GOOD!!! After that, they realize what they had and now it's gone!!! I LOVE to have a man feeling that way after he totally disrespected me!!!!!!!!!!!! They all tried to get back with me and I just played the game and had them looking stupid!!! Girl you have a bright future ahead of you and you will get ultimate love you deserve!! KEEP YOUR HEAD ABOVE THE WATERS!

chiquitalu · #17 01-01-2006, 11:49 PM

Great for you, you are strong and will be a better person without him in your life. I am glad you were able to see what he was doing. And your post is very inspiring, Thank You
Best wishes to you.

MattsAngelGirl · #18 01-03-2006, 10:31 AM

Thanks so much for the support ladies!!! I waited for almost 7 years to finally find him again and was "with" him for a little over a year. I'm just glad that I told him everything that I had wanted to tell him with in the first few letters to him. I have absolutely no regrets whatsoever, and that's one thing I thought I would never say.