Notice to new members intending to register - from January 9th 2012

katewu · #26 03-07-2008, 08:12 AM

Quote:

the crime in TJ and border towns scares me. the drive back over the border sucked and was given a problem at the border. the day i got back i heard that there was a shooting for a couple of hours between cartels and law enforcement just on MONDAY!

Well the shootings scare me too, I hear them at times and I am in the states. I am way deep in SSD, about 2 miles from TJ and my brother heard the shootout you were talking about, automatic weapon fire for hours. He was scared even here, what a mess.

MandyMeMe · #27 03-07-2008, 09:44 AM

Well today i'm doing pretty good still havent left the house in 7 days..yes a whole week and havent gone anywhere except to the corner store. The fair is in town and today is the first day so we are planning on going tonight. So yeah i get to leave the house for awhile. Also i'm not so emotional the past few days as the m/s is not as bad and i think it all stems dwn to the fact that i'm coming back to the states for a month in a few days. So that helps me knowing that i am leaving here for awhile. The weather has been crazy here one day the high is in the upper 70's and the next day it's 108...yeah 108. Thank God he got the air conditioner working upstairs. i'm not sure i would of lived through that kind of heat. My fiance is going to the Dominican Republic while i'm in the staes to see what business is like there. He has several friends he met while in prison that are from there. And they all say it's the place to start a business. So well see maybe we will be moving to the Carribean before to long. Who knows anymore. I just keep pressing that we need to be settled by June because my kids can come visit me the whole summer and i want to be settled and because the baby is coming in 6 months and i want to be settled by then also.
The neatest thing happened yesterday my fiance counsin came over and she about 13-14y/o and is a very smart young girl and asked me if i would teach her and her friend english. I was so surprised that someone asked me and she knows a little english from school. And i agreed. So that is something that will help keep me busy when i come back here. Hey that might turn out to be something bigger. I can teach classes here out of the internet cafe we have. Ummm i just dont know how to teach english? I guess i need to check out some books when i'm in the states on teaching english. That would also help me learn spanish too. So i'm a little excited about that. well i'll keep yall posted as to how things are going.

pristock230 · #28 03-07-2008, 02:23 PM

mandy I have followed your story from the begining. Like everything in life it has it's ups and downs but I'm sure you will find your happy medium soon.

Good Luck

katewu · #29 03-07-2008, 02:56 PM

http://eleaston.com/

This is a good resource, you can Google "teaching English Spanish speakers" and a lot of material comes up. I enjoy reading what life is like in Mexico, a different world.

I was wondering since you miss church activities, is there a church of your denomination down there?

Adrienne · #30 03-07-2008, 05:31 PM

Ask the girls if they have a book or any other material that they use for their school. It helps to use their material to have a better idea. Here in Colombia I refuse to tutor anyone if they don't have a book or material unless they are at a conversational level. For some reason, tutoring is hard work for me but one can make great money by doing it. Your idea to have classes in an internet cafe is good but just be careful on how you advertise it, if you don't have the right to work in MX. Glad to hear the ms is not so bad.

zunigan · #31 03-07-2008, 07:47 PM

We live just below where the last shoot out took place. The homes in that area are very very nice. You never know who you are living next to. Our neighbor hood is quiet and we hardly ever see anyone. Most of the people live in Tijuana and work in the usa. Even the weekends are quiet. Tijuana is just a large town like Los Angeles, lots of people and traffic. The border crossing will always suck until some one makes a lot of noise and they decide to open more lanes. Right now it is always a 1-2 hour wait. You just have to learn to live the way they do and make the best of it. I get up and think gosh I have a 2 hour drive, but when I get to our house and I see the smile on my husbands face, hear him tell me how happy he is to see me and starts to tell me all that went on durning the week and what he wants to do now that I am there makes it all ok.

MandyMeMe · #32 03-10-2008, 04:24 PM

I suggested that we live on the border and my finace flat out refuses. He says there is way to much stuff going on up there. It would be better for me i know. Zunigan sounds like you have a good balance of life in the states and mexico. They balance themselves out.
I took a look at there english books and it really was a joke...there is no spanish in the books at all and the level is almost for an average english speaking person. No real value in teaching english at all. As far as teaching for money i'm not interested in the money right now. I'm not sure if this is even my calling. I thought it would be something to keep my mind busy.
Were in the Dominican Republic right now and later this week i'm going back to the states for a month. So maybe when i get back to MX i figure out what to do. I know i am planning on helping those girls..but not much more than that right now. Being away from MX makes me realize how much i really dont want to go back...at least to where we are living. Last friday we did go to the fair and that was interesting. Nothing like the states at all. So many different things to see and do...one section of the fair was nothing but cantinas/bars...with dancing floors and dj's and full service bars...at the fair where kids are...i would say at least 15-20 different bars one right after another. The kids rides were safe looking and lasted much longer than the rides at other fairs i've been too. Like one ride my son was on lasted almost 5 min...i was thinking ot my self...geez when is this ride gonna stop. They had fireworks and all kinds of animals right there to touch. Whole restaurants set up shop and they were grilling goat and chicken...very interesting.

becky0827 · #33 03-10-2008, 06:15 PM

I think it depends of where you live I lives in a small town mear to matamoros and believe me my life was different compare to you. i was thinking that was in the past , but i think that is in the rural areas of Mexico the mexican border style of life is like the way of life we have here. I used to have over there in my house cable, AC all over the house (yes the bill is more expensive that is here)My house over ther had marmoleum floor which i wich I had here all my house is carpet i hate it. Each bedroom had its own bathroom, an the closets over there they had space not like the ones we have here. Over there houses have more space than here. they are built and think in everything that is something that i miss the space..The stove over there was of gas which is better than electricity, I donot have it here because the house where I live right now was already built and to put gas I had to spend more money. Yes over there I everyone in the family had its own car. the houses are made out of concrete they last forever. Everyone knows each other,, and you get with your friend just making a call come to my house or they get to your house unespectly, because as you say most of the women do not work or men own their own business that are at home early. Everything is more relaxed over there, but to have that kind of life is expensive, that is why I came here. To learn english and get a better job. And I have no idea what my husband is gonna do over there because it is hard to make something in Mexico. and yes you are right the clothes over htere has a bad qualilty, people from my hometown come every weekend to shop here in the Valley. and I don't go to the mall in months. It is not that bad Mexico just depends where you live. here in the border and big cities is better I think. Yes there is alot of dirt over there you wash your car in the next 3 days is dirty again. And you dont want to have a rainy day becuase the streets get worse. But Mexico is nice just

becky0827 · #34 03-10-2008, 06:29 PM

My daughter posted I did not get to finish. The last thing that I wanted to say it does not matter where you are now.The most important thing is that you have your husband at home. You should move to the border, so you don't miss part of your life. You could come to work and go back to Mexico. That is what I plan to do. Bye

times_up · #35 03-10-2008, 07:12 PM

i think for me, i want to recreate my life there and succeed.... and if that means taking our time and looking for the best way/place to earn a decent living, have our necessities...(plus a little luxury) , good schools, etc.... then we're willing to take the chance and be separate for a little while until we find it. and soooo far, it seems further away from the border, mexico can generate it's own economy, instead of searching for that tourist dollar. mexico city, guadalajara, monterrey.... all have bmw's, harleys, etc..... where as tijuana, cabo san lucas, ensenada, mexicali, portions of chihuahua... are all dep. on tourist dollars. when we went to ensenada to check it out,word was that the u.s. was in crisis and everyone was panicking because that meant no tourist money coming in. i feel that we need to move to a location where mexican money is good and the city can thrive on it's own. I feel that with deportation experience, it threw us a loop. and now we have to pick up and make the best of it. i don't want to be a statistic... or live in poverty. I don't speak spanish either... but it doesn't hurt to check out everthing that mexico has to offer.

MandyMeMe · #36 03-11-2008, 09:04 AM

Timesup..i understand exactly what you aret alking about however having been through both Monterrey and Mexico City on different occasions...those are very big city's with a huge american influence..living in those city's are like living in the US..prices there are just as high or higher than than the states. Making a good living in one of those city's is not easy either. We've thought about living in Tampico..which is on the gulf coast..jsut like monterrey...the housing is higher than the city in the states i came from Charlotte, NC. To live there our income would have to be over $50,000 USD..that is hard to make onwing your own business right off the bat...i guess you would have to start off low in a small apartment then pray that everything goes up from there. Yall i have seen so much and belive me we have checked into so many things and what to do and what not to do and living in MX is not as easy as what one would think. If you have money when you come here...that is much easier..money to start a business and live for 6 months-1year...then you will be fine. If you dont have that luxury then it is not easy. I dont mean to rain on any one's parade but really it's not as easy as what you may think.

myboysmom · #37 03-11-2008, 11:51 AM

MandyMeMe, your blog is the most interesting account of someones journey that I have ever read. I teach elementary special education, and I would love to share your story with my students, most of which have family in Mexico. They have never been or know what it is really like, some don't even know how to speak Spanish. Please know from someone that teaches children, that you have written something that can turn into either a novel, children's book, (if you tell it from your son's point of view), but I will tell you this it is spell bounding. I hope you continue to post your life in Mexico, and if it is alright with you, I would love to print it and share your story with my students.

times_up · #38 03-11-2008, 12:14 PM

mandymeme, i look at it from a different point of view. my hubby help start tattooing in mexico when he was deported the first time in 1995.... so everyone kinda knows him already. he still has his shop in a smaller city... but it needs to grow. moving to a big city where everyone HAS the money for tattoos, helps us. in another blog, i mentioned that everyone's situations are different... different skills, different financial situations. i'm just saying that IF you can work for yourself, do it.... because the jobs there DO NOT compensate the employee. best of luck.

times_up · #39 03-11-2008, 01:30 PM

i tried editing... but it wouldn't let me... so continued....

i'm also not saying that it isn't hard. shit, i'm scared to death. life is really different. and if we make the move to guadalajara.. yes, we;ll live in that small apartment until we can make some money. but it's a chance i'll take considering if we don't, we'll still live the same in some small town. what are your plans now? are you going back to the dominican republic? i would think things would be harder there than mexico? wouldn't they?

ToTheSimpsons · #40 03-11-2008, 04:16 PM

My husband and I have purchased a house in one of the border towns. nice home...pretty cheap compared to the US, yea its not the best little town to live in, but at least my son can cross and go to school in the US and I can work on the US side. Getting a business started is something he is having issues with. Money goes fast over there also. Its hard for pooky especially cause him so use to working his ass off here in the US for good mula. This is our biggest argument of all, he feels so depressed as he is used to being the "big man" on supporting family and now he has to rely upon me to bring in the money and that is one thing he is having a hard time accepting. So no its not easy living in Mexico especially when you never lived there before and have allot of adjusting to do both financially and emotionally. Im over there every other weekend and the separation is really hard on us.

dzzzyangel · #41 03-11-2008, 04:50 PM

I can now say that I am SCARED shitless... hahahaha...

times_up · #42 03-11-2008, 05:32 PM

TotheSimpsons.... i know what you mean. my hubby is hella depressed... because now I hold everything.... the house in the US, the cars, the kids, the businesses, our lives.... and he's in mexico, trying to get ready for us to come down. i've gone down a couple times already and the kids are going next week.... and then us all in april. all i can say, is motivation is keeping us together. how do you like the border drive? the only thing about border towns, well in baja, is that they are alot higher because of california 2nd home buyers. we looked at some there last week and they were hella expensive!!!! argh!!!

Italian · #43 03-12-2008, 12:18 PM

Hi Mandy,
I too am in Mexico came here a year ago to be with my Man and I totally relate to all that you have wrote. I too am very lonely as my Spanish is limited as well. Yes we have a nice home and all the luxuries that are possible here and I am doing the best I can. I am not sure exactly where you are but I am in Jalisco and although I do teach English it is not enough to keep me occupied. My husband works 14 hours a day 6 days a week so it gets hard sometimes but to be with him is all that matters. I would love to talk with you and hopefully become friends and if you are close to where I am at maybe we can meet someday. I unlike you drive after being here for two weeks I said screw it and got behind the wheel. So far so good but yes they are maniacs here hwen it comes to the road heck my husband has an autobody shop so he sees a lot of damaged cars. Well Mandy you hang in there as I do everyday and hopefully we can become friends. Oh yeah I have an email address that this lady will send you information on your area about events, churches ect. that are for Americans who do not speak Spanish if you are interested let me know and I will send it to you. Take Care

ToTheSimpsons · #44 03-12-2008, 02:01 PM

times up...the only thing I dislike about that border town is what time of day is the easiest to cross back to the US. Sometimes it can take up to an hour to sit and wait to cross. That totally bites. Im trying to have him keep busy somehow cause when he sits.............he mopes around and the we argue about every little thing..he said he needs more sex...hahahaha....well baby you gonna get it this weekend, its my weekend to go back and him and I have lots of making up to do.

zunigan · #45 03-12-2008, 07:46 PM

It is really hard on the men, they are so used to earning money in the states and then they get there and its hell to even find a job. Most factory work pays about 700.00 mexican dollars, so maybe 70.00 dollars and when you are used to doing construction like my husband and makeing 800 a week or more depening on how hard you work its really sucks. Also since I work in the usa I pay most of the bills and I know at times he hates it but thats the way it is. I have told him so many times sorry but you are the one that got yourself in trouble and sent home. Now you have to deal with it. I think with all the dam medical problems and trying to find a doctor who really knows something about brain tumors and just does not sit there and shake their head. Heck with me working at least we can have a ok home and cable, phone, internet and cell phones. It makes it a little more barable to just have something. Plus we eat well, and can go places and do things. The gas is what is killing me I spend at least 240 a month just to go and come each weekend. I love movies and thats one thing you can get so cheap 5 for 10 bucks and most are really good copies. There are some things I do not like about Mexico but there are just as many I hate about the usa. I feel blessed to have had the last 10 months with my husband cause he was not given much of a chance with the second brain tumor. If nothing else I have to thank the CDC for getting him the treatment they did cause it has given us some more time together. Each day we don't know what is going to happen so we just try and be happy. We sit in our back yard in the patio he built and play with the dog I gave him. We BBQ each weekend and have a couple of beers and just kick back and thank god that he is here and ok now. I would give anything to have him back here but he can not be so we just have to make the best of it. I hope to someday buy a house close to the beach and sit on the patio there and watch the sunset each and every day. Life is hard here, but can you just think what it has to be like for them who live there, were born there and are never going to go anywhere else?? Oh and Mandy are you going to return to the us to have your baby??????I was wondering about that!

katewu · #46 03-13-2008, 12:55 PM

The papers mentioned that because of all the border traffic that consumers aren't crossing back and forth anymore, or at least as much. No money on either side is hurting the San Ysidro businesses, many will close soon. We do have an international outlet mall here though.

See below.

Is it possible to move closer to TJ, like where I live, to acclimate to Mexico before you go? We have all the things that Mexico has and the people are still very rural in their ways. Most of the shock comes when you see it is just Mexicans, not Anglo-fied Mexicans and it's the real deal.

Every year babies freeze to death less than 2 miles from my house, yes I send clothes and blankets, but it breaks my heart. That abject poverty would be the hardest for me.

Sorry to hi-jack your thread MandyMeMe

MandyMeMe · #47 03-13-2008, 07:47 PM

Hey all i am in the states as of late last night...the Dominican was very different nothing like Mexico or Panama...very laid back though. I'm kind of glad to be back in the states. I miss my honey already, it's hard having to leave him...but knowing that i will see him soon helps. I'm excited that i get to see my kids tomorrow and spend some good quality time with them. I want to respond to a few of the responses above and i will as i get some more r and r. I've don alot of flying in the past 5 days and need to get over this jet lag.
I do want to answer my dear friend Zunigan:
I am not coming back to the US to have the baby, i will have the baby either in Mexico or the Dominican...which ever country we end up living in. As my fiance wants to move to the Dominican now...i will not have my baby in a hospital..as the hospitals in MX are so c-section happy and push epidurals like candy. I want to have this baby at home with a mid-wife or partara(sp) midwife en espanol. This will be my 4th baby and i feel confident with my body and know that my body knows what to do in labor. I am also reading alot of books on homebirth. I have a few books i've ordered that have come in i cant wait to go pick up. My sister is coming a month before the baby is due and is researching homebirth and will help me with everything after the baby is born. I've read that if an american citizen has a baby abroad that the child will still have US citizenship and citizenship in the country in which he/she was born. So that is a huge plus for this baby. Having dual citizenship. The whole process may take awhile, but it is worth it to me to have my fiance present and birth our baby at home. I'm so excited about it.

zunigan · #48 03-13-2008, 08:47 PM

Ok so you are going to have the baby there. I guess you are much braver than I. I had 3 and of course my last was 34 years ago, but I don't think I could do the home birth thing. I am to much of a baby in some ways. Just talked with my husband and the dizziness he has had for the last month has gone away and he feels good again. I think he has a problem with his inner ear due to the radiation they did on his temporal lobe so close to his ear. Getting ready to make the two hour drive again on Sat. take care Mandy and gald to hear you are spending some good time with your children. That part has got to be hard. Take care.

times_up · #49 03-13-2008, 09:24 PM

zunigan, kinda of like a vertigo dizziness? i had a really bad car accident, with damage to my inner ear.... and get vertigo at random times....i was scanned for brain prob. etc... NOTHING. i ws given meclizine and some other weird drug last time i was in mexico. is it something similar. it was pretty extreme. sorry this is off subject... but i haven't found anything to get rid of it!!!!

zunigan · #50 03-14-2008, 09:27 PM

It has to be awful. Of course everytime he gets this feeling he thinks it is another dam brain tumor. I don't blame him I guess after two and the spinal tumors I would think the same. I talked with him again and he is feeling better. I just hate it that he can not come back here, at least here they know something about this thing. I did contact a couple of doctors here who are from there and they are going to try and get me the names of a good doctor who does know brain tumors. There are some good and bad things about living down here, and even though there are so many doctors I wonder if any of them really know what they are talking about,