Notice to new members intending to register - from January 9th 2012

ladymurda · #**151** 11-29-2009, 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lolitatex

I dont know what I would do if my husband ever told me his was bi? When I go visit my husband we have talked about it because he doesnt understan how other inmates can be with their wife or girlfriend on visitations and then have boyfriends while in prison. My husband was sentenced to 45 yrs and expects me to be faithful so I expect the same from him while he is in prison. But I guess it depends on the person, some people need to have companionship and need to have someone in their every day lives. My husband and I have been throuh a lot these past 4yrs and the way I look at it is we can deal with just about everything and still betogether. I doubt this was any help but you have to really think on this and see if it is something you can deal with.

Lola

this is so tru me and my friend wass comin back from a visit and we wass on the bus cause both our husband are locked up in the same cf..so we wass listen 2 a women on her fone comein from the same vi talkin on the fone 2 who ever and theres this guy on the visit floor whos really big bulit and his wife comes up there every visit i always see her and her man been down 11 yrs..so anyway the girl wass like yea i just cam back from seeing my brother so shes like yo there wass some sexy a**guys on the floor bulit all big etc..so shes like but check this my bro wass like he dnt understand how u get on the visit with your wife than go back 2 tha cell and f another man and she said it so loud so the whole bus can hear her and so we can all know who shes talkin about..and as she wass sayin this im like wowww if thats tru that this guy is doin this thats his buss thats something his wife and him and god has 2 answer but 2 be honest thats very hurtful on a womens part cause she thinks hes faithful 2 her like she is 2 him and hes in tha yard or the bathroom doin another man thats hurtful..my man been down 2yrs almost 3 he has 3more yrs 2 go..and i trust my man wit alll my heart and i know he wouldnt do nothin like that but wit all these things goin down u have 2 ask yourself if i ever go thru something like that how can i handle it ...but if my man ever came 2 me and told me hes bi i would be hurt but i will still be with him as only if he promise 2 be faithful 2 me than we okay we been thru worst than that.. so kno i would still be with him cause i love him and he wass honest with me..but i dont have 2 worry about that cause i kno my man..BUT SHOUT OUT 2 WOMEN WHO'S GOIN THRU THAT OR BEEN THRU THAT

britnewbill · #**152** 11-29-2009, 11:19 PM

I would leave my man. I just couldnt deal with the fact that he was attracted to other men while he was with me. You know? Maybe its just a confidence issue. But I wouldnt be able to handle it emotionally.

mzsogood · #**153** 11-30-2009, 07:40 AM

as much as i love him i would have to let him go!

*#1AndOnly* · #**154** 12-01-2009, 03:09 PM

I love the peanut butter and jelly analogy !

I unfortunately am among those of us that are already stressed enough knowing he's got women comin at him .. I'd go insane if I had to think of men bein in the equation also !! But .. myself, I don't necessarily find it sexy for women to be together either .. so I guess I don't like peanut butter or jelly !

sophie2009 · #**155** 12-14-2009, 11:56 AM

I would leave him that mnt .. I don't like / want to share.. and to be honest it doesn't matter if he s with a man or a woman .. I want him with me and for me only .. I have a hard time excepting his comments when he s watching tv and telling that he saw someone who looks like me . I'm like b**** where s she ??

MikesWifey · #**156** 12-15-2009, 10:17 PM

I didnt read this whole but may come back and finish but I did want to respond o this.

If my man were to tell me he is bi, I am NOT sure how I would feel about it. I don't "think" It wouldn't change how I feel about him or who he is to me. I am bi myself but i refrain from activity with women even though my man would be okay with it. I prefer men even though I am attracted to women and have been there before, i personally would probably never have a exclusive relationship with a woman because the woman I am desires the penetration only a man can give and all the strap on stuff isn't for me, it isn't real and doesn't hardly feel real. For me being with other women is like adding dessert to dinner so to speak. its may be delicious but it isn't filling ( no pun intended)

I "believe" I would stay with him but to me he would have to be absolutely sure that I am who he wants to be with because I KNOW I couldn't handle him having sexual relations with other men while in a relationship with me. Cheating is cheating and if you want or desire another man than I am not the one you should be with, be with HIM ( hypothetically speaking).

I went threw a similiar situation like this many years ago. sort of. I was with this guy that I really was in love with at the time deeply. and one night this very topic came up and he said no he wasn't bi and that he never had done anything like that. Well, some time later he confessed to me that he was at these gay guys house that he knew and they were drinking and got smashed and one of the gay guys we hitting on him and he said that curiosity got the best of him and he tried it ( him on top, so he says

) but when he told me I was

for the lie and I also found myself feeling disgusted by it.

Me personally ( i dont mean any harm with this statement just stating my feelings and personal opinion) I feel like a man who has sex with another man is "less" masculine in my eyes and it personally is a turn off when I find out a dude is bi, maybe it is a double standard, but for me, two women are not penetrating each other with anything real (penis) and we are feminine by nature but to me, men are not meant to be "phucked" by other men, they were made to sex women, to me that is what makes men masculine to me and attractive, if I wanted something feminine acting I would get a woman & even the thought of a thugged out dude taking it in the rear is a bigger turn off to me because I feel like he is a walking lie. you look one way ( very manly) but act another ( feminine). To me to be penetrated is a feminine thing.

I really am NOT trying to be "offensive" here, just trying to answer the original posters question about the double standard but I can only answer it for a way that it make sense to me.

MikesWifey · #**157** 12-15-2009, 10:27 PM

Let me add this though. I do NOT have a problem with people living the life that makes them happy, no matter your orientation again I am BI. I just know for I wouldn't be totally comfortable with my man being bi, but if he is it shouldn't effect our relationship as long as he is being faithful to ME, if he decided to go and be with another dude that is his choice I wont say it wouldn't hurt but it would hurt if it were a woman too. I am only stating for me personally that is how it makes "me" feel. I know I love my baby with all my heart and if he were I'd stay but I wouldn't tolerate him having sex with a man nor a woman cause this is our relationship.

People are who they are and I don't tend to judge as long as it isn't effecting my relationship more power to you.

DianeDavis · #**158** 12-15-2009, 10:39 PM

That's just nasty. The thought of that really messes me up. It would be a wrap for me if I found something like that out.

greeneyedlady19 · #**159** 12-15-2009, 11:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by timsbaby41

First my baby would never ever consider having sex with a man.and hell no i am not bi..I love my man Please understand i am not bashing gay people at all i'm not trying to come across as better then gay people just answering the post

my sentiments exactly. i could not have said it better myself!!

*Ken* · #**160** 12-16-2009, 04:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MikesWifey

Let me add this though. I do NOT have a problem with people living the life that makes them happy, no matter your orientation again I am BI. I just know for I wouldn't be totally comfortable with my man being bi, but if he is it shouldn't effect our relationship as long as he is being faithful to ME, if he decided to go and be with another dude that is his choice I wont say it wouldn't hurt but it would hurt if it were a woman too. I am only stating for me personally that is how it makes "me" feel. I know I love my baby with all my heart and if he were I'd stay but I wouldn't tolerate him having sex with a man nor a woman cause this is our relationship.

People are who they are and I don't tend to judge as long as it isn't effecting my relationship more power to you.

You are cool - don't worry - you have not come across as offensive in my opinion.

Wooly Rhino · #**161** 12-16-2009, 02:19 PM

It is my belief that defining yourself by how you reach orgasm is a little bit stupid. Pleasure is pleasure. I am male and prefer the company of women. Always have. I dont find men attractive but when you stop and think about it, I like everything that men do to men. I just prefer a women to be the one doing it. Most of the long timers tell me they are gay in prison because that is their only choice. I enjoy multiple partners and in a pile I have tried most everything. Anything that is fun, must be okay. God made it all. Try it all. Just play safe.

tara.j · #**162** 01-09-2010, 10:49 PM

I agree that there's a double-standard for men and women being bi-sexual, in most cases it's more acceptable for a woman to be bi-sexual. Watch daytime television or even a commercial and there is suggestive bi-curious behavior going on between two women. Even guys will be accepting of their woman being bi-sexual, they will often feel like they can "have their cake and eat it too." But being bi-sexual, I want to just say that just like being heterosexual, it's not just about sex. Just because you're bi-sexual doesn't mean you're a promiscuous, flirty person, that loves having menage-a-trois. Being bi-sexual means that I'm attracted to men and women. I'm attracted to both for different reasons, and each person is different as well. While I'm in a relationship, whether it be with a man or a woman, I'm always monogamous, I don't sleep around, and I don't have any intentions on bringing in a third person into the bedroom just because I'm bi-sexual. Now with that said, I would be a little apprehensive about entering a relationship with a man if he told me he was bi-sexual. But at the same time, why should I treat him any differently? Hey it's complicated. *God Bless*

MiyraruAku · #**163** 01-09-2010, 10:59 PM

I would stay. Heck , I been through worse. Plus I am one of the cutest things on the planet. Nothing is better than the angel you know. If his eyes are glued on me, the past is the past. Just know from here on out, it only 1+1=2 unless we do the old equation of 1+1=3

dontazzz · #**164** 01-10-2010, 11:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lolitatex

I dont know what I would do if my husband ever told me his was bi? When I go visit my husband we have talked about it because he doesnt understan how other inmates can be with their wife or girlfriend on visitations and then have boyfriends while in prison. My husband was sentenced to 45 yrs and expects me to be faithful so I expect the same from him while he is in prison. But I guess it depends on the person, some people need to have companionship and need to have someone in their every day lives. My husband and I have been throuh a lot these past 4yrs and the way I look at it is we can deal with just about everything and still betogether. I doubt this was any help but you have to really think on this and see if it is something you can deal with.

Lola

That is a long time with no sex 45 years. I have said when I go to prison you are free I can not and will not ask that you be in here with me cause of my fuck up. people being BI we all are and gang rapes happen in prison so I think I would understand anything in there and deal with the outside when they come home. JMO

Princezz11 · #**165** 01-14-2010, 06:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvssks

Would you leave him? Why or why not?

And do you consider yourself bi?

Why is there a double standard, it seems, in this country? It is much more accepted for a female to be bisexual than for a man to be bi. I don't understand that.

I've even known women that are bi but would bail on their man if they found out he was bi. That makes no sense to me. Can anyone explain it??

Well I can't speak for everyone but in myy case I feel a woman is more acceptable based on the sexual act the actual sex between women isn't the same as two men where there is actual intercourse involved its just not something I want to picture my man doing but I would leave my man I have noting againts bi or gay men I love them actually but I would never want to date one

angelndeeskys · #**166** 01-14-2010, 11:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvssks

Would you leave him? Why or why not?
JUST MY OPINION BUT KNOWING MY MAN WAS GAY AND IN JAIL {PRISON} I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO KEEP A VISUAL OUT OF MY HEAD. ITS JUST CONSIDERED VERY SUBMISSIVE I BELIEVE NOT TO MENTION WEAK!!!!! LIKE i said just an opinion ...no hard feelings cause it takes all kinds to make the world go round!!!!!!!!!!!! its really not for us to judge though because we dont know until we have had to walk in their shoes.PEACE OUT XOX

And do you consider yourself bi?

NO

Why is there a double standard, it seems, in this country? It is much more accepted for a female to be bisexual than for a man to be bi. I don't understand that.

I've even known women that are bi but would bail on their man if they found out he was bi. That makes no sense to me. Can anyone explain it??

yourgrlnow · #**167** 01-23-2010, 07:09 AM

this is exactly what i am talking about ladiess. This is why i am in trouble. This is the situation i brought up, but i was even understanding about it if it was his situation. See it happens. If ya'll talked about it at visiting, it is real. If you dont understand what i am talking about see my posts!!!! Yourgrlnow

p.m. Me i iam lost & confused!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by lolitatex

i dont know what i would do if my husband ever told me his was bi? When i go visit my husband we have talked about it because he doesnt understan how other inmates can be with their wife or girlfriend on visitations and then have boyfriends while in prison. My husband was sentenced to 45 yrs and expects me to be faithful so i expect the same from him while he is in prison. But i guess it depends on the person, some people need to have companionship and need to have someone in their every day lives. My husband and i have been throuh a lot these past 4yrs and the way i look at it is we can deal with just about everything and still betogether. I doubt this was any help but you have to really think on this and see if it is something you can deal with.

Lola

chuckwifey · #**168** 02-11-2010, 11:28 PM

I would leave my husband and not look back, no I'm not bi

HeatherDewerff · #**169** 03-03-2010, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luvssks

Ty Tims.

I am just trying to really understand why there is such a double standard. Most ppl, if/when they find out I'm bi, they consider it no big deal...hell, they might even consider Damian for having a bi gf. BUT...if they found out HE was bi...it's not nearly as acceptable to ppl; and I'm sure I'd be advised to leave him. <rolling eyes>

its because people think of women for nothing better than for sex, so if a womans bi then yay for the men, they get to watch girl on girl and still have sex with her, but if a man is what fun is that for anyone other than a gay man? nobody seems to understand its anot always about sex, its about feelings, love and companionship. people are very close minded.

Heather<3

Xellena · #**170** 03-13-2010, 09:59 PM

I would stay...Would i be mad that he "lied to me" Yes and no...I would understand why he felt by sociatal standards that he had to ...yes...Would it hurt that he felt I would view him the same...yes

I would have some questions about if he had pursued his BI side while we were together...if so how "safe" was he...I would also ask that if this was something he "needed" in his life he make me apart of it...Just because a person is BI it doesnt mean they act on it...I am BI but havent been with a women since my husband and I got together. A few years before we met even. To me Bisexuality is/was me saying ...it is the person you are attacted to, the person you fall in love with...not the gender.

ambeeeezy · #**171** 03-15-2010, 08:40 PM

I would stay with him. We've had this talk and he's 100% straight, but it really wouldn't bother me, honestly. He's with me faithfully, so another man wouldn't effect us. I love him for who he is and that's the bottom line.

$Mrs.Chavez$ · #**172** 03-15-2010, 10:31 PM

eww...no srry to be all blunt and all...but no! he is not bi! but i would leave his ass real quick if he ever was...

Luvmyjuan · #**173** 03-31-2010, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by $Mrs.Chavez$

eww...no srry to be all blunt and all...but no! he is not bi! but i would leave his ass real quick if he ever was...

what is a good way to ask him and get him to tell the truth. some men might be ashamed and scared to say.

hisbabygirl08 · #**174** 03-31-2010, 10:34 PM

i know forsure my man is not at all gay. he is way to straight but honestly i am so in love with my man and he is my everything so to be honest with you i can not really say unless i was in that setuation.

LeStrange · #**175** 04-02-2010, 04:52 PM

I would leave in a heart beat