extremly depressed someone help:(

[imissrondale]

as everyone has probably seen i have not been posting much at all lately i am just so out of it i do not know what to do well here is the situation one my husband could have his hearing any day now which is what he was told by his counselor i have no where for him to live i am still lookig for a job no luck due to a small town and no sitter to find employment well then today after this my son had a dr appt and they finally said he definately has adhd but i told his dad about it and he is trippin cause he says he does not act like that with him and so he does not need the medicine and i am jus drugging him up cause i cannot handle him he is suppose to start his stratera tomorrow but now i am worried what if he is telling the truth and my son really does not need this medcine then my parents are not happy at all cause i was only suppose to be here for 1 month well 3 mths later i am still here with no job and have accomplished nothing but a car and then my husband who wants me to save for an apartment wants money but i guess now he says to not worry about him and i am just really goin nuts right now i am already depressed and have not taken medicine in months due to no insurance i have had 3 anxiety attacks just bein so stressed i feel like i cannot do anything right and it is making me mad at my husband he took care of me then was just gone and my life went to hell i just need some encouragement i know i can do this i just have noone to support me or give advice thankyou guys for listening to me vent once again i do not know what i would do with out all of you thanks

[California Sunshine]

YOU CAN DO IT!!!! It's tough but I know you are a strong women and can get through this! Does your town have any kind of daycare assistance where they would help pay for day care while you worked? or rental assistance? If so apply apply apply until you get on your feet.I don't think our men really understand just how hard it is out here alone especially with children!
My friends son has adhd and the medicine they put him on helps him a lot but medicine for a child is a big step so don't take my word for it!

Please hang in there,try and chin up.Just have faith one way or another things will work out and that we are always here for you!

[jglsqueen]

I don't really know what to say, except that you're not alone. Try to think of all of the positive things in life and don't concentrate on the negative. I suffer from depression too, so I tend to know how you must feel. Things get to be overwhelming when you're not feeling great. Hang in there, things will get better. Try not to think about everything at once. Think about one thing you can do to feel better. I'm sure your parents aren't going to kick you to the curb, leaving you in the streets. Just explain your situation and ask for their patience. Don't worry about your husband right now, he's getting his basic needs met. As for your son, well maybe he has ADHD or maybe not, but it seems that if you've gone to the doctors and that's what they say you have to go with that for now. Start him on the medication and see how it goes, I would imagine that he can be weened off of it in the future? If he's exhibiting hyper behavior around you, having the medication may ease some of the symptoms, thereby reducing some of your stress. Then again he may be reacting to the current situation. I know it's hard to make any decisions at times like this, just try to concentrate on one thing at a time. Is there any work you can do from home? You have a computer at home? Maybe you can look into some type of work from home where you don't need a baby sitter or transportation?

You are WOMAN, you are strong. You can do anything you set your mind to, don't let your situation get you down, or keep you down. Get out for a walk when you can. I find it invigorating and it gives me time to clear my head and the feeling that I can conquer the world in just a few blocks. The best part I get all of that and it's free!

I don't know if anything I've said is of help to you, I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers. Again, hang in there, things will get better.

jglsqueen

[1nonlyTeRe]

I'm sorry you're going through this Melony.. take Sunshine's advice.. go to your county and see if they can help you with child care assistance, I know when I was looking for a job the county helped me out.. ask around if their any organizations to help you and your situation.. I know it is hard.. but in times like these you do what you have to do.. look around for subsidized housing.. that would be good until you can find a godo job and somewhere better to live.. just keep yourself strong.. do not give up and stay away from the negative thoughts.. I would say if the doctors told you your son needs this medicine, then try it out.. if it messes him up, you can always take him off it.. sometimes meds work, others they don't.. you need to clear your mind.. you are a strong woman and I know you will get through this!! Just know that you are not alone and I'm here if you ever need to talk!!! I'll keep you in my prayers!!!

[Bethie_Boo]

I just wanted to give you a BIG hug dear!

[rosita]

Dear Melony, I am so sorry things are out fo control right now. I too am not doing so good since my husband left Dallas. I have depression too. So I know how that can be. I am praying for you Melony, your son, and Ron. Take care Miss Lady. ((((HUGS))))

[rosita]

sorry Melony, I mean Rondale. Take care!

[KRAFTIKAT]

I So Know How You Feel, If It Wasn't For Bad Luck We Wouldn't Have Any Luck At All. The Only Way I Know Of Dealing With It Is Don't Stress What You Can't Control, Focus On Less "have To Dos", At One Time, Tell Everyone To Get Off Your Back Cause You Are Doing The Best You Can, They Can Support You Not Put More Pressure On You. Even Though You Think You Don't Have The Time, Take A Time Out For You. A Hot Bath With Scented Candels Dim Lights Easy Calming Music Breathe As Deeply As You Can And Let It All Out A Few Times, Clear Your Thoughts And Enjoy The Warmth Of The Water And Relax. Then You Are Ready For Bed, And In The Morning You Might Feel A Little Better And Ready To Take All Of Them On Again.

[tweetie123]

Melony, I sent You a PM, Please Read It!

[north star]

BIG HUGS!!!!!

I know exactly how you feel. I was laid off June of last year, and except for a few weeks at a temporary job, I hadn't had any luck either. I am out of the meds I need, and couldn't even get my doctor to complete the forms to possibly get them free unless I came in for a check up and lab work. Hello?!? Do you not understand the concept of no insurance-no money ergo free meds needed!?

Do you qualify for unemployment? It's not been much but it's all that's gotten me by. I don't have kids though and I know that makes things even harder for you. It's really tough when you don't have some kind of support. My folks have been great about opening their home to me (for 2 years now with the prospect of at least 2 more to go! and I do pay my own way) but even then they don't really understand how hard it is, and I don't often burden them with it as they have their own (health & money) problems to worry about.

Maybe there is a church you could get involved in? Check around and see if there is a prison ministry in your area? They usually offer support, and some type of gatherings periodically. And you know you can always turn to us at PTO! I'll keep you in my prayers.

[octobriana]

Oh,Honey I have been where you are.That was 20 years ago and I see now the way I came out of it was to slowly handle one issue at a time.Sure,I have messed up stuff in my life right now-but we do get through it!Take the problems one at a time-instead of looking at it all together,it is too overwhelming that way.It does take TIME,sometimes lots of it-so if it seems like things are'nt getting better,give it another few days.You will look back and see that it is!In my town the local police department will give you assistance on how to help yourself in crisis situations-directions to a local food bank-information on child welfare-I have even seen them personally deliver food baskets to those in need.If you stop by the police information desk and explain your situation-and the help you need-they may have the power to get the ball rolling for you.The police are very involved in the community and are not all bad guys-I have found that out firsthand!They connected me to the crisis center that saved my life all those years ago.I'm sure the police support system works much the same in every community-I hope you can give it a try.
Big Hugs
J

[jeffsprincess]

hey girl! you did acomplish one thing you got a car. first of all how old is your son. stop the meds!!!!!!! alot of children are recieving prescription drugs for adhd at such a young age and most of the time it does more damage than good. doctors are so willing to prescribe drugs for anyone its mostly all about making money. little kids go through it. they are terrible and drive you insane. i have a 4 year old and when he was two he drove me nuts, but he grew out of it. check into your social services department. usually they will pay for daycare if you are working. if you have to pay anything it will be a small weekly fee! they have a lot of programs for daycare assistance for single working mothers. dont give up. i dont know what state you live in, but check it out. be very careful with the meds too! and stay strong. if you want to pm me and tell me where you live and i will try to find out about daycare assistance for you. i have two kids and my oldest one goes to school but my little one goes to daycare and i only have to pay 100 dollars a week. they go on how much money you make. i know $100 dollars a week is alot but i would have had to pay $210! if you make under like $400 a week you only have to pay like $30. and he goes mon-fri, 8am-5pm. good luck to you and try to stay strong. you got the car that is the first step.

[Patty]

It's hard enough having your man in prison and to make matters worse you must deal with all that you have on your plate. It is no wonder you are feeling down. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make the hard times go away unfortunately the hard times are what we have to go through to come through all of this. I believe in you hun, I know that you will take the advice from all the others that have posted and together with your own inner strength find a way to turn all of this around and have a positive outcome. Thanks for keeping us up to date, I was worried about you. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your son and your man. Take care and stay strong.

Patty

[Kandee]

Okay I feel you sweetie but have to look past this so your son has ADHD so does mine he is not hyper or anything but I can tell you the feelings you are feelings are normal about the meds and all my boy has been diagnosis since 2001 and I still go thre the same thing my son is now 15 and believe me I see the difference in his school work when you go for making 13 and 14 to 80 & 90 I see the difference (praise God) then I started to wonder will he become addicted to the meds his dad has a addicitve behavior so this worrys me but I just pray now in January we were to he is diabetic and has to gives hiself insulin shots (bummer) but it's okay cause we will get threw it and I just think God it is not Cancer or Aids so we can manage it and with good management he can live a long productive life.

I said this to say God doesn't make mistakes he knows all.And this is just my opinion but I don't think God gives these disease to people who cannot handle them his words says he will not put more on you than you can bear so think about it you are blessed and though things may not seem like you are doing good always know there is someone doing worst you gotta to thank God for all of life little lessons known and unknown so pick yourself and tell the devil he is a liar you are more than a conquerer okay um about to start shouting now LOL I think back from how far I've came I could have been dead etc. but he saw fit to keep me here and I just thank him.

Okay you heard the sayings when the praises go up the blessings come down so start to praise him even in the mist of the storm.

And keep your head up. Pray about your son and the medication God says ask and you shall recieve so ask for his guidiance in th situation and remember confusion is not of God so if you confuse about it keep praying until you are at PEACE. Have you ever heard of NOMI JUICE? check it out.

[Wittysweet]

Belive In Yourself And You Will Be A Creator Of Your Destiny!!!!



You can do it!!!!
I pray for you and your family...
Witty

[starzzmom]

<<<<<<<<<<<<HUGE HUG FOR YOU>>>>>>>>>>>>>
As for your son, have you gotten a second and even third opinion? I know kids can be a handful, and they DO get out of a control (I have a 3 yrd old - so I know). But I hate to think of him being on meds if he really doesn't need them.
Look into any and all state/govt/federal programs, for assistance in $,day care,insurance. Aren't you eligible for Medicaid? . Can't you work from home? Maybe YOU can start a babysitting/daycare from home. Kill two birds with one stone with that one. If you're a good typist, you can do resumes at home, or medical transcription for a doctor/hospital. How about trying to get a night job in a hospital, and maybe your parents can babysit at night. How about office cleaning or housekeeping at a hospital? That has to be done at night. I keep going back to the hospital thing because there has to be one close to you, and they run 24 hours a day, and need people for all shifts. I know things seem horrible right now, but keep your head up, deal with one thing at a time, and things WILL get better. You can do anything you put your mind to. You managed to get a car. ANd that's great! One down! Just keep going! You can do it!

[imissrondale]

thank all of you that posted your support i incredily appreciate it i have not got a second opinon for the adhd see when he was in headstart they evaluated him he was so fidgety he fell out of his chair several times he hurts himself consatantly scrathes his face punches himself cannot even sit long enough to eat a meal he is extremely hyperactive from morning till night late night it is nuts i actually found some numbers in the phone book about daycare i am gonna call on monday and goin to do yet another job search monday before i go see my husbandso maybe i will have some luck thank you guys so so so much

[rosita]

Melony you are in my thoughts and prayers. Rosita

[~cheenna~]

Hi Melony ... I'm going through some tough times now myself and can sure relate to how you are feeling down, over whelmed and depressed ... it can be very hard when you have small children to try and tend to ... I know how concerned you must be about putting your son on this type of meds but you need to follow your gut instincts here, no one knows your child better than you so go with what feels right ... do they have any community mental health facilities near you in one of the larger towns? They usually work on a sliding scale fee basis and will pay for your meds if you can't, talk to your son's Dr. about this, I'm sure he can tell you what is available ... You'll get through this time, it's hard, I know, but just take one day and one problem at a time ... and take time to take care of YOU. This really is so important and I think most of us forget this but if you aren't feeling good you can help your children to feel good ... take time to pamper yourself a little, even if it's just a long bath with a couple of lit candles ... it will make a difference.
{{{ hugs }}}

[rainydayw]

yOU CAN MAKE IT FROM TODAY TO TOMORROW AND THE NEXT DAY AND THE NEXT CAUSE YOU KNOW WE ARE ALL HER TO HELP IN ANY WAY WE CAN!

I WILL KEEP YOU IN MY PRAYERS AND THOUGHTS!

I HAVE SOME OF THE SAME PROBLEMS YOU DO AND IT IS VERY TOUGH TO GET FROM ONE DAY TO THE NEXT BUT ALL I HAVE TO DO IS LOOK AT MY SON AND KNOW THAT HE NEEDS ME AND I TRY A LITTLE BIT HARDER FOR HIM, AND THE OLDER ONE WHO IN PRISON NEEDS ME TOO .

TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS

BONNIE

[ButterflyDancer]

Straterra is a new behavioral drug which is very much unlike the Ritalin often used in the past helps brain functioning. I know that using medication with children who have ADHD is very much debated. For what it is worth close friends of mine are using it with their eight year old who was previously (before they took guardianship of him) an overmedicated mess. Since he's been only on Straterra the single side effect has been a little weight loss which for him was a plus. Otherwise, now he sleeps well, can carry on an uninterrupted conversation, is calm, and is doing well in school. You can read a lot about Straterra on the web. I hope it helps him and provides some peace in that aspect of your life. As for his dad's response. He is telling the truth. Sometimes boys are much more compliant with adult males simply because they respect a man's physical power. That doesn't mean the man is abusive. It is just a matter of "he is bigger than I am" deal or that the boy is worn out with dealing with women and welcomes being with his dad. If Straterra isn't what your son needs you'll be able to tell. I hope your Human Services office helps with housing, food stamps, and child care assistance. They might also through a medical card be able to help you find family therapy to help deal with your son's ADHD. After all, parents' need a huge amount of support, too. Check out ADHD on the web, too, and I think you'll find a lot of support on line. And, a medical card could help provide your meds, too. Hang in there because you are right here with a lot of us having the same problems. Take a deep breath and start dialing that phone. Believing in good things for you, WJ

[j2sq]

hang in there!!!!! be strong! u can do it! stay strong for u and ur son! i know that right now it is hard, but we are all here for u--always remember that!