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Loving a Lifer For those whose loved one is serving a life sentence.

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  #1  
Old 09-21-2010, 11:16 PM
SOLLIAH SOLLIAH is offline
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Default My Lifer got his response from his court appointed lawyer

My lifer has done 30 years on a 15 to life bid. He has not had an disiplinary write ups in 15 years. Has even gotten a good letter from an officer from the prison he is in, in California. Anyway the federal court gave him a lawyer to fight his appeal. He put the response to the attorney general's denial to the federal court. Tonight my man got the paperwork, he was tired and grouchy but he read some to me. Now my man has been in some form of training, school or self help program since 95. He has help young inmate, he loves to teach. I love this man and I believe in him. I dont always trust the system, they lie and cheat more than inmates. But I try to listen to him and he seems so sure and he asked me if I am ready for him to come home, yeah silly man, I would wait outside that prison in the parking lot in my car waiting for him to come out that gate. I pray to God that he gets a court parole date. It will be atleast 30 days before we know. I am so excited and I know he is. He has never gotten this far. I want him to know I am behind him. I got his back. But I think my mistrust of the system is what he hears. I want to be there for him. I dont know what to do. I am so scared he will think I am not trusting him. He believes he will be home by next year. He has me convinced, but I still know the courts decide. I love him and want him home. I need a positive thought crystal if there is such a thing. Thanks for listening. The lawyer's response was great, here to hoping the federal court judge thinks so as well.
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  #2  
Old 09-22-2010, 01:23 AM
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Default My turn to say good luck

Good luck, is this his first appeal, what level court is he in? Sending good vibes both of your way.
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Old 09-22-2010, 10:07 AM
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This is great news! Keep him positive, and yourself too! Try and bite your tongue if you find that something negative may come out, even if it's a LITTLE thing....I learned that the hard way.

Best of luck to you and Lifer!
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Old 09-22-2010, 10:12 PM
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Thank u. Yeah biting my tongue is not goin good. I just had my car repo and am considering bankruptcy. I am not sharing these things with him, figure has enough on his plate. Once parole our relationship will be long distance, him in california and me in arizona. That not bad, we would only be five hour away less then we are now. I want him to get out even if we apart he deserves a second chance. We talk today and he blew up so I used my homework excuses. I dnt want to fight. I can tell I stress him out. I just want to know what this means. But I guess he figures what I got to be anxious about. He done the 30 year. So bite my tongue, thats why I got the tongue ring so I dnt bite anymore. LOL. I do love him, and I am sure he anxious, excited, happy, and scared. He in the 9th circuit federal court. I am sure that his lawyer said the best place to get a decision in his favor, but the gov can deny again, but they say he probably wont. Maybe I should just let him have his moment in the sun. An not dwell on the how longer a year with a date set means nothin to him. He says the judges will make a decision in 30 to 90 days. And he will go to the board shortly after that. Then he will have a set date. So ok I will bite my tongue. Ugh. LOL, keep the peace. Thank God for you all on PTO I be crazier without u. Thks ladies.
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Old 09-22-2010, 10:26 PM
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Good luck, is this his first appeal, what level court is he in? Sending good vibes both of your way.
. Thanks for the good vibes. This is not his first appeal against the board, they always deny him. But he got denied using bogus reasons like orignal crime but the Lawrence case knocked that out the water. This time the used it but put a different spin on it. Put no proof of current threat. I hope and pray the judges decide in his favor. I love to see him in another color besides blue. Maybe green black tan etc., among other things. I am also looking forward to our date at the jazz club. .
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Old 09-22-2010, 10:44 PM
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Good luck girl! My dad is a lifer and we been waiting for a response from the court about his release he has done 15 years so far and hopefully he gets a parole date it takes so long he did this back in april I talked to his lawyer and she said she thinks everything went well!!!!! So I know something good well happen for your man
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Old 09-22-2010, 10:51 PM
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Good luck girl! My dad is a lifer and we been waiting for a response from the court about his release he has done 15 years so far and hopefully he gets a parole date it takes so long he did this back in april I talked to his lawyer and she said she thinks everything went well!!!!! So I know something good well happen for your man
. I hope ur dad comes home. Man it hard waiting for them to make decision. But I knw I driving him crazy with all my question. So I am calming down. Just yesterday a girl told me he was not being fair to me because he got life sentence, but I cant imagine life without him. I pray your dad and my man come home soon. Hugs.
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Old 09-22-2010, 10:57 PM
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what wonderful news stay positive!! i pray all things work for the good for the both of you.. it sounds he has come a very long way and all his hard work will pay off. but i know part of you is doubtful and not wanting to be dissaponted if it dosnt go threw, please stay positive im prayoing for you two congrats to the both of you,
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Old 09-22-2010, 11:20 PM
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what wonderful news stay positive!! i pray all things work for the good for the both of you.. it sounds he has come a very long way and all his hard work will pay off. but i know part of you is doubtful and not wanting to be dissaponted if it dosnt go threw, please stay positive im prayoing for you two congrats to the both of you,
i am trying. Thanks for your prayers. I know he has worked hard. He is positive/me negative like a battery we give off alot of power. LOL. But I have more faith now since me and him got together. He has been a positive force in my life. But I just want this to go in his favor. An I guess I am worried if it does not turn out positive for him. I love him and dont want him to be hurt. More positive that will blow his side away. We gonna exploded.
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Old 09-23-2010, 12:48 AM
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. I hope ur dad comes home. Man it hard waiting for them to make decision. But I knw I driving him crazy with all my question. So I am calming down. Just yesterday a girl told me he was not being fair to me because he got life sentence, but I cant imagine life without him. I pray your dad and my man come home soon. Hugs.
Thanks girl
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Old 09-23-2010, 05:47 AM
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Can I just ask a question: Your guy can get a parole date through a federal court? I'm just looking for some clarification on the whole thing. In NY, if you win a parole appeal it just gets you another parole hearing, not a release. You mentioned also that your governor can veto it. I wouldn't think state governors can overrule federal decisions. I'm not clear if your guy is in federal prison or state prison but I'd really love to know about federal courts giving parole dates, if I understood correctly that that's what's going on in your guy's case.
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Old 09-23-2010, 01:36 PM
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Can I just ask a question: Your guy can get a parole date through a federal court? I'm just looking for some clarification on the whole thing. In NY, if you win a parole appeal it just gets you another parole hearing, not a release. You mentioned also that your governor can veto it. I wouldn't think state governors can overrule federal decisions. I'm not clear if your guy is in federal prison or state prison but I'd really love to know about federal courts giving parole dates, if I understood correctly that that's what's going on in your guy's case.
its not all states. Its california, the federal judges want inmates released. There was a case against the parole board denying without reasons or using the orignal crime as reason even though he is not a current danger. Its state prison. An the board actually gives the date. They will if the court rules against them parole board. It does go to the gov. But he probably will let it go. It has been only since 08. The lawrence case start it all. My man has 3 other writs but this one got the most play. Do u have a lifer in NY? What are the chances of parole there? Calif is less than 4percent for lifers.
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Old 09-23-2010, 10:04 PM
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Thank you so much for explaining that to me. I'm going to look up that case you mentioned although I think I've read that and wished it applied here in NY. NY prisons are shrinking in population, not growing, so the same concerns don't exist here. My lifer is in 27 years now and still has a bit to go before he reaches his minimum. Parole in NY is broken as it seems to be everywhere. Mine is in a max, odds there for a lifer is about 7%. Those lifers in mediums are at I think 11% or 13% chance. Some lifers never go to mediums for various reasons. The release rates have been shrinking for the past 15 years and looks like they will continue to shrink. We have four new parole commissioners just appointed here. They are all prosecutors and retired law enforcement. I don't see it getting better any time soon.

Last edited by Irish Girl; 09-23-2010 at 10:06 PM..
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Old 09-23-2010, 10:50 PM
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Good luck, I will be praying for the both of you Your man sounds like he done a lot of good with his time and deserves this.
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Old 09-24-2010, 11:22 PM
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Good luck, I will be praying for the both of you Your man sounds like he done a lot of good with his time and deserves this.
thanks so much. I am proud to be his gurl. I like that he does not blame his mistake on anyone but him. An that he still grows and learns despite his incarceration. He is mostly self taught. An he is a like a sponge on all subjects. My favorite one of his lines is Babe, let me asked u this? An we have so much fun learning and sharing.
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Old 09-24-2010, 11:31 PM
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Thank you so much for explaining that to me. I'm going to look up that case you mentioned although I think I've read that and wished it applied here in NY. NY prisons are shrinking in population, not growing, so the same concerns don't exist here. My lifer is in 27 years now and still has a bit to go before he reaches his minimum. Parole in NY is broken as it seems to be everywhere. Mine is in a max, odds there for a lifer is about 7%. Those lifers in mediums are at I think 11% or 13% chance. Some lifers never go to mediums for various reasons. The release rates have been shrinking for the past 15 years and looks like they will continue to shrink. We have four new parole commissioners just appointed here. They are all prosecutors and retired law enforcement. I don't see it getting better any time soon.
what is his minimum? My lifer was 15 and he has done 30. California is bad cuz we have a three strike law 25 to life and all felonies count not necessarily just violent. So some are non violent offenses. Sad.
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Old 09-25-2010, 12:33 AM
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Originally Posted by LEONLILMAMA View Post
My lifer has done 30 years on a 15 to life bid. He has not had an disiplinary write ups in 15 years. Has even gotten a good letter from an officer from the prison he is in, in California. Anyway the federal court gave him a lawyer to fight his appeal. He put the response to the attorney general's denial to the federal court. Tonight my man got the paperwork, he was tired and grouchy but he read some to me. Now my man has been in some form of training, school or self help program since 95. He has help young inmate, he loves to teach. I love this man and I believe in him. I dont always trust the system, they lie and cheat more than inmates. But I try to listen to him and he seems so sure and he asked me if I am ready for him to come home, yeah silly man, I would wait outside that prison in the parking lot in my car waiting for him to come out that gate. I pray to God that he gets a court parole date. It will be atleast 30 days before we know. I am so excited and I know he is. He has never gotten this far. I want him to know I am behind him. I got his back. But I think my mistrust of the system is what he hears. I want to be there for him. I dont know what to do. I am so scared he will think I am not trusting him. He believes he will be home by next year. He has me convinced, but I still know the courts decide. I love him and want him home. I need a positive thought crystal if there is such a thing. Thanks for listening. The lawyer's response was great, here to hoping the federal court judge thinks so as well.
I am also praying for you guys, keep your head up and stay strong for him. I am also dealing with the California system ASP. My lifer has done 24 years on a 17 to life bid. I know how hard it can be on us, dealing with everyday life and trying to be that rock for them. Some days are better than others, some days I just wanted to stay in bed with the covers over my head. I dont know if there is real justice in the system, it has let me down too many times. But we have to keep the faith, that our time WILL come!!
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Old 09-25-2010, 12:43 AM
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@pookiessparkle ASP same prison. Its so hard. Right now he is so excited. I hope our time comes. I am trying to be patient and that hard. I know that faith is hard sometimes. But I am learning patience my personal cross, that want it rite now. Yeah I got to be patient. I am really learning so much.
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Old 09-25-2010, 01:07 AM
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I am sorry I have to ask this and I dont mean to sound dumb but what is a lifter?
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Old 09-25-2010, 01:12 AM
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That's awesome I wish you guys luck... Man.my best friend is a lifer and that gave me so much hope that he is coming home soon too my prayers are with you guys also
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Old 09-25-2010, 05:53 AM
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Leonlimamma, my guy's minimum is 27 2/3. We have the same three strikes law in NY but my guy is not in for that. Missy, a lifer is someone with life on the end of their sentence, like 15-life, 20-life, 25-life, etc, or it can be an LWOP which is Life Without Parole. The difference is a chance at release versus no chance. The problem with the chance at release, which is what parole is, is that they give very, very few people that chance. It did not used to be like that but has become more and more so since the mid 90's and therein lies much of the unfairness.
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Old 09-25-2010, 08:20 AM
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You're going to have to make a decision of what's more important. Sorry, but if this is the first time he's gotten this far with the courts, then keep your disdain for the system out of your voice and SUPPORT YOUR MAN, GIRL! -Delphine
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Old 09-25-2010, 09:13 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LEONLILMAMA View Post
My lifer has done 30 years on a 15 to life bid. He has not had an disiplinary write ups in 15 years. Has even gotten a good letter from an officer from the prison he is in, in California. Anyway the federal court gave him a lawyer to fight his appeal. He put the response to the attorney general's denial to the federal court. Tonight my man got the paperwork, he was tired and grouchy but he read some to me. Now my man has been in some form of training, school or self help program since 95. He has help young inmate, he loves to teach. I love this man and I believe in him. I dont always trust the system, they lie and cheat more than inmates. But I try to listen to him and he seems so sure and he asked me if I am ready for him to come home, yeah silly man, I would wait outside that prison in the parking lot in my car waiting for him to come out that gate. I pray to God that he gets a court parole date. It will be atleast 30 days before we know. I am so excited and I know he is. He has never gotten this far. I want him to know I am behind him. I got his back. But I think my mistrust of the system is what he hears. I want to be there for him. I dont know what to do. I am so scared he will think I am not trusting him. He believes he will be home by next year. He has me convinced, but I still know the courts decide. I love him and want him home. I need a positive thought crystal if there is such a thing. Thanks for listening. The lawyer's response was great, here to hoping the federal court judge thinks so as well.

Hang in there! Send him with tons of great letters, full of positive attitude! I remind my man that his time is my time,,at least every other day I mail something out, not always even mentioning his writ in the courts. The distraction seems to help him deal with the slow pace of the system. It is hard, but, we are women and that's how we roll!!
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Old 09-25-2010, 08:36 PM
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I am sorry I have to ask this and I dont mean to sound dumb but what is a lifter?
sorry miss key lifer. Ha.
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Old 09-25-2010, 08:45 PM
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You're going to have to make a decision of what's more important. Sorry, but if this is the first time he's gotten this far with the courts, then keep your disdain for the system out of your voice and SUPPORT YOUR MAN, GIRL! -Delphine
its not his first writ. The first time he is giving a lawyer though. But I know what u mean. I am doing great now. My acting skills are better. I say prayers every night. An I ask for faith and his release. Thanks for the response. I know this is harder on him than me.
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