He's been out for 2 months and we've both relapsed. Again.

[Alabasterbox]

just read your story first i want to say im sorry ,but you must learn how to kill satan he is the drug which wants to kill.steal,and destroy you.you have to tell your self that you love you ,and go get professional help once you learn to defeat the drug then you can help your boyfriend one of you have to be strong to help each other stop feeln stupid we all do something stupid over and over ,but we also know when we need to fix our mistake.God in the name of jesus plz help this person look to you for help with her addiction give her strength to endure these demons that keep knocking at her trying to destroy her in the name of jesus pick her up and carry her Amen.

[HiS BiiBii 2123]

Originally Posted by codasgirl04

You depend on him just like you do the drug, no offense but you are writing like a tweeker. I understand from the other side of meth....let me tell you a story my daughter had to sit in her shit for a 8 hr court ordered visit bc her dad was so high on meth he couldn't take care, you have chosen to do it again, you have chosen to be with him, you will lose your family, job, house, car to this & u are damn lucky he hasn't snitched on you....you will end up in prison if you dont stop!!!! I seriously get so mad reading stuff like this quit worrying about your damn bf &.worry about you!!!

why do you say im lucky he hasnt snitched on me? ya the drug has f***** with his head but i know he'd still have my back 150%, hes taken the blame for me before so i aint trippin on that, him snitchin on me aint even on my list of worries right now! im not trying to make excuses for him either, i know our relationship isnt healthy and that i need to quit being dependent on him...and no offense taken when u said i sound like a tweeker, im aware of it, im working on it lol. thanks for your input....

[fishsgirl]

i dont think u sound like a tweeker at all...the only thing u sound is honest n sincere...i wish u n ur man the best...

[missingmytubby]

wow I know where your coming from your post had me in tears I know about chasing the high Im married to someone whos gone 6 months to what was suppose to be a rehab for 6 months he has been there 2 months 4 to go then off to a halfway house.My hearts broken with out I pray he gets help he would do pot, speed, and then the crack which he had got me hooked on. But I have been off it a month soon will be 2 months all it does is make me worse down and broke its not worth it yet I still want to get high but its not worth it. He says he will stay clean we will see all it will take is for him to drink his beer and his kids to bring their pot around for it all to start over again. His probation officer sent him to drug classes 3 times she told him it was rehab for 6 months or state jail for years.I pray he does stay clean and that he is home for Christmas. I knew he drank beer and smoked weed when we met I didnt know about the other drugs but spending $20 on a little rock for a few seconds of a high then oh we need more and getting mad at him because he would get high and id feel like i didnt. Then missing work over being stupid. I just dont want that kind of life so I hope he does change .But you cant change them they have to want to change. He got baptisted and is going to church while he is there says he is going to church when he gets home. Its been a month today since ive seen him or heard his voice he is 5 hours away.I got a home phone praying he would call me but he hasnt the letters are few and far between. We will be married 3 years come Nov 15th and have been apart alot and had a rough marriage. I pray you find peace and happyness.Thank you for venting Im glad Im not alone in this.

[BreezyBaby]

This story brought tears to my eyes.....You need to save yourself!! If he wants to continue using let him, get away from him or he can choose to get & stay clean with you. You both need help, it doesnt seem like either of you are there to help one another just get high together and trust me thats not going to get you the relationship or life you seek. Be honest with your family so they can help you before its too late and your in prison along side him. Im sorry and sadden to read this

[LaBooBoo]

It was really brave to share your story here. I hope you have gone to a meeting since you last posted.

You know that your bf has to help himself and you can't.

It seems the same pattern happens. You both sober up for a little while. One of his "friends" comes around with the rubbish and is right back at it again.

He has to realize he has to give up those people he associated with. They certainly aren't his friends.

I think once you get caught up in that lifestyle, you have to change everything even moving away.

He comes back to the same area and those same people are around.

It is like first starting a diet, and the co worker that keeps bringing the donuts in sticking them right under your nose. Really who is going to be able to resist that? He isn't going to be able to resist his "friends" sticking it under his nose and then you get with him and you get right back into it.

good luck to you. change your entire life if you have to.

[MsSchoolday]

I know it's two months later since you posted this - I'm wondering how you and him are doing? Has anything gotten better? I'm so very very sorry to hear that the two of you are destroying your life this way. I feel so much sadness for you because I know the strong hold that drugs take on someones life. Once it has a hold on you, it's like a cancer that keeps eating away. I have lost many people in my life due to drugs - my son was murdered by a drug addict, my daughter in love od'd on drugs, and my other son is in jail serving a long sentence due to a drug related crime.

My heart goes out to you and your boyfriend because it looks like the two of you have tried many times to get away from it but it has a powerful force. The only thing I can suggest is that the two of you get as far apart as you can and start a new life without each other. Get yourself clean again and look for love from men that have not had a drug problem. It is very hard to have a relationship when both are drug addicts or are recovering because when one slips, usually the other will fall too - that's been my experience.

God bless you and I will be thinking about you. Take care of you, that's all you have.