College Student Pursuing Prison Relationship for Paper

[Vyvy]

Hi,

I am currently working on some ideas for my college papers. One of them that I really hope I’ll be able to write about will be on inmates’ relationship (specifically romantic) with people outside the prison walls.
There’s one particular inmate that I would really like to focus on in the paper, named Robert Glenn who I saw on MSNBC’s Lockup documentary. I believe he is still at Corcoran’s SHU.

I can't post the link to the video clips he is in since this is my first thread, but if you look up "lockup raw: predatory behavior pt 2" or "inmate on inmate" on Youtube, you can easily find him.

My current questions are:
1. What is it like being in a relationship with someone that you cannot have physical contact with?
2. MWI versus met before incarceration, what are your opinions on them because I have heard a lot of stories about women being used/tricked by inmates.
3. Is it a good idea to directly contact Robert Glenn, or even pursue an inmate like him for a topic? I don’t know anything about him other than what appears in the video clips.
4. Should I even try to attempt to write a paper on this type of relationship or is this just a bad idea?
5. Any advice?

I’d be happy to answer any questions for more detail about my paper or myself.

[Beachhouse]

1. I view it like them being deployed or in a long distance relationship. Just with horrible employers, low pay, and tons of unjust situations.
2. Personally I would not feel comfortable with mwi, because I have no non prison view of them to compare with the prison view. Met before is me and I know with certainty there are no tricks or using because each part of his support supplies something. I supply the encouragement and love, and keep him on his toes with my quirky humor. Someone else supplies money, etc.
3. good question.
4.lots of info out here for the paper so you wont have a hard time finding what you need.
5. keep an open mind, good luck.

Originally Posted by Vyvy

Hi,
My current questions are:
1. What is it like being in a relationship with someone that you cannot have physical contact with?
2. MWI versus met before incarceration, what are your opinions on them because I have heard a lot of stories about women being used/tricked by inmates.
3. Is it a good idea to directly contact Robert Glenn, or even pursue an inmate like him for a topic? I don’t know anything about him other than what appears in the video clips.
4. Should I even try to attempt to write a paper on this type of relationship or is this just a bad idea?
5. Any advice?

I’d be happy to answer any questions for more detail about my paper or myself.

[babygurl2010]

My current questions are:
1. One of the hardest things I've done. To be blunt, it isn't about the "sex" its the hug or just being able to lay my head on his shoulder. The things I will never take for granted again.
2. It doesn't matter how you met that special some one. You always take a risk of being used or hurt. In this relationship there is more communication than any other I have had. You have 20 minute phone calls you don't mess around you TALK. Same with letters. I, myself put more out there then I would in just a verbal conversation.
3. This is a good question. I wouldn't because I think you can write a paper just with the help of people on this site alone and not have to do some thing so big. Every person that has this type of relationship has a story on here and most are down right inspirational.
4. I think it's an awesome idea. Any light given to inmates that shows that they are people, regardless of their past they do not deserve to be forgotten and every one deserves to be loved.
5. Advice I have always given my children "pray about EVERY thing and ALWAYS go with your gut."

Keep us updated. Best of luck!

[lisainengland]

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[LeStrange]

Is it a good idea to directly contact Robert Glenn, or even pursue an inmate like him for a topic?

Wait are you saying that you want to pursue a "romantic relationship" with an inmate named Robert Glenn to see what it is like and for your research paper???

[huskymum4ever]

I think it's an interesting topic.
However, If you want to start a romantic relationship with an inmate for your paper, that is really unethical of you to do so.

You should be straight and upfront with any inmate you write to, stating what it is you want from them.

It would be really unfair for you to ask them questions, and if they pour their heart out and put a lot of effort into telling you, for you to then turn around and say
'gotcha, k thnx bye', because you've got what you want, after leading them on to think that you could be a friend.

[Hisoneandonly]

I may be reading it wrong but I don't think that you should pursue a romantic relationship with anyone inmate or not for a paper, even though this men are locked up they are still human and still have feelings and playing games isn't nice...and in some cases b/c some of these men are dangerous playing with them could be even more so. But here are my answers to your questions
1. What is it like being in a relationship with someone that you cannot have physical contact with? It sucks, we get a couple hugs and kisses every month but that is it. Sometimes I would love to just have him hold me after a long day or something but that cant happen yet. And no sex, well you do kinda get used to it.

2. MWI versus met before incarceration, what are your opinions on them because I have heard a lot of stories about women being used/tricked by inmates. W e were marrried before hand and this is my only prison relationship. I never pictured myself in one. So I can't speak for the MWI's

3. Is it a good idea to directly contact Robert Glenn, or even pursue an inmate like him for a topic? I don’t know anything about him other than what appears in the video clips. See my top response

4. Should I even try to attempt to write a paper on this type of relationship or is this just a bad idea?See my top response
5. Any advice? Keep an open mind.

[OneOfMany]

I am currently working on some ideas for my college papers. One of them that I really hope I’ll be able to write about will be on inmates’ relationship (specifically romantic) with people outside the prison walls.
There’s one particular inmate that I would really like to focus on in the paper, named Robert Glenn who I saw on MSNBC’s Lockup documentary. I believe he is still at Corcoran’s SHU.

So you want to write a paper about romantic liaisons between prisoners and free people, and in your paper mention one inmate in particular--Robert Glenn.


How are the two issues linked?


People are used and abused in relationships every day. Whether one is behind bars has little to do with it.

I hope your paper will be more fair than the sensational hype the media provides.

[babygurl2010]

"There’s one particular inmate that I would really like to focus on in the paper, named Robert Glenn who I saw on MSNBC’s Lockup documentary. I believe he is still at Corcoran’s SHU."

I dont think Vyvy is looking to "start a relationship" with an inmate for the paper?... Are you Vyvy?...

[mrsgonzos]

The school year is over, even for colleges. I understand that there is summer school, but to write and gather information for a "research" paper during a summer college session (for what class) would take too long because it would have to all be by mail and an assignment would not be finished in time since classes usually only run 6 weeks for summer sessions. Unless, you go to college online, but still it sounds suspect. So my question is: What is the REAL reason you would like to contact him? With that clarification I could provide an honest opinion...

[heartfriend]

Vyvy, can you hear the defenses of our LO's behind bars going up in your replies? As I read them, they echoed what went through my mind. I don't think a single one of us would object to any information being published (no matter how small the reading public of it might be) if it would enlighten the general public on the hardships not only inside, but outside of those bars, also. But, your post wasn't clear enough. If you want to develop a relationship solely for the purpose of writing without informing your subject of your goal, I find that...objectionable. Thank you for thinking of the subject, with the percentage of the American population incarcerated growing at an alarming rate, you'll find no dearth of information from which to pull, please remember, though, this affects many hearts, minds and souls, all as human as you. I wish you luck, I suppose, but it would be helpful if you would clarify your means as well as your aims. Thank you, heartfriend.

[gypsyish]

Originally Posted by mrsgonzos

The school year is over, even for colleges. I understand that there is summer school, but to write and gather information for a "research" paper during a summer college session (for what class) would take too long because it would have to all be by mail and an assignment would not be finished in time since classes usually only run 6 weeks for summer sessions. Unless, you go to college online, but still it sounds suspect. So my question is: What is the REAL reason you would like to contact him? With that clarification I could provide an honest opinion...

As a graduate student, I'm still expected to work on potential research for the upcoming semester independently all summer, and in my last year of undergrad I had to do a bit of summer work to be ready to graduate by December. I think it's a little unfair to say that because most colleges aren't currently in session, that this person has an ulterior motive.

And to the OP:
HOWEVER, I have NO idea why you want to include this person from Lockup in a paper on romantic prison relationships. I watched the Youtube clip and he is not by any means the average prisoner. He is an extremely violent offender who says in the documentary that he enjoys attacking and murdering his cellmates. There is NOTHING in the video clip about prison relationships so I'm really curious as to what kind of connection you could possibly be trying to make? I can't answer your questions until I feel more comfortable about the direction of your paper.

[Vyvy]

Originally Posted by Beachhouse

1. I view it like them being deployed or in a long distance relationship. Just with horrible employers, low pay, and tons of unjust situations.
2. Personally I would not feel comfortable with mwi, because I have no non prison view of them to compare with the prison view. Met before is me and I know with certainty there are no tricks or using because each part of his support supplies something. I supply the encouragement and love, and keep him on his toes with my quirky humor. Someone else supplies money, etc.
3. good question.
4.lots of info out here for the paper so you wont have a hard time finding what you need.
5. keep an open mind, good luck.

Thank you for your reply. Your knowledge and personal experience is appreciated.

[Vyvy]

Originally Posted by babygurl2010

My current questions are:
1. One of the hardest things I've done. To be blunt, it isn't about the "sex" its the hug or just being able to lay my head on his shoulder. The things I will never take for granted again.
2. It doesn't matter how you met that special some one. You always take a risk of being used or hurt. In this relationship there is more communication than any other I have had. You have 20 minute phone calls you don't mess around you TALK. Same with letters. I, myself put more out there then I would in just a verbal conversation.
3. This is a good question. I wouldn't because I think you can write a paper just with the help of people on this site alone and not have to do some thing so big. Every person that has this type of relationship has a story on here and most are down right inspirational.
4. I think it's an awesome idea. Any light given to inmates that shows that they are people, regardless of their past they do not deserve to be forgotten and every one deserves to be loved.
5. Advice I have always given my children "pray about EVERY thing and ALWAYS go with your gut."

Keep us updated. Best of luck!

Thank you so much! My gut is what makes me want to write this paper, haha.

[Vyvy]

Originally Posted by TheStrange

Is it a good idea to directly contact Robert Glenn, or even pursue an inmate like him for a topic?

Wait are you saying that you want to pursue a "romantic relationship" with an inmate named Robert Glenn to see what it is like and for your research paper???

Sorry, no, that's not what I meant at all. I'm going to edit my post to make it clearer.

[Vyvy]

Originally Posted by huskymum4ever

I think it's an interesting topic.
However, If you want to start a romantic relationship with an inmate for your paper, that is really unethical of you to do so.

You should be straight and upfront with any inmate you write to, stating what it is you want from them.

It would be really unfair for you to ask them questions, and if they pour their heart out and put a lot of effort into telling you, for you to then turn around and say
'gotcha, k thnx bye', because you've got what you want, after leading them on to think that you could be a friend.

I'm sorry, but I didn't make myself clear enough when I posted. I'm re-editing the post to try and clarify my intentions.

[Vyvy]

Originally Posted by Hisoneandonly

I may be reading it wrong but I don't think that you should pursue a romantic relationship with anyone inmate or not for a paper, even though this men are locked up they are still human and still have feelings and playing games isn't nice...and in some cases b/c some of these men are dangerous playing with them could be even more so. But here are my answers to your questions
1. What is it like being in a relationship with someone that you cannot have physical contact with? It sucks, we get a couple hugs and kisses every month but that is it. Sometimes I would love to just have him hold me after a long day or something but that cant happen yet. And no sex, well you do kinda get used to it.

2. MWI versus met before incarceration, what are your opinions on them because I have heard a lot of stories about women being used/tricked by inmates. W e were marrried before hand and this is my only prison relationship. I never pictured myself in one. So I can't speak for the MWI's

3. Is it a good idea to directly contact Robert Glenn, or even pursue an inmate like him for a topic? I don’t know anything about him other than what appears in the video clips. See my top response

4. Should I even try to attempt to write a paper on this type of relationship or is this just a bad idea?See my top response
5. Any advice? Keep an open mind.

Sorry about the misunderstanding. I'm re-editing my post about the relationship. Thanks for your input, though.

[lil peep]

Are you trying to use him as an example of what we could be getting ourselves involved with? I haven't heard of him and didn't watch the clip, but if he's an oddball example, he's probably not the best person to use. Otherwise it sounds like you want to write him to try and start a relationship to see how it works. I hope that's not what you meant! No matter where they are, these guys have feelings and don't want to be used anymore than we do! To answer your questions though:

1. Being in a relationship with someone you can't have physical contact with is difficult! You want to be able to hug them, kiss them, see them when you want. You want to be able to do all the things regular couples get to, but you can't...at least not for the time being.

2. I'm MWI. My opinion is that like any relationship, you need to take your time to get to know the person you're in a relationship with. Sometimes you see red flags early on and can avoid a disaster if you so choose, but sometimes you don't see them at all or you don't see them til a lot later. I think MWI is easier in some ways b/c you enter the picture after they've gone through the arrest, sentencing, getting shipped out and after the actual crime has been committed. So you aren't dealing with the aftermath of all of that. You aren't having kids ask "where's my daddy?" or struggling to pay bills with one income now instead of two. But both circumstances have their own set of difficulties. In any relationship you and get used/played. How many times have you seen or heard about women meeting up with a man at a bar, only to find out later that he's married with 3 kids? It happens all the time out here as well.

3. Like I said above, I don't get why you want to contact him. I don't think it's a good idea to use anyone as a lab rat so to speak especially when it sounds like he's a very violent man from what some of the other posters said.

4. I think writing a paper on this is a great idea! You can get a lot of good feedback on here from people who are currently in relationships, people who have been there and have their men home, as well as from people whose relationships didn't work out. You'll get the whole spectrum here.

5. Any advice? Like the other ladies said, keep an open mind. But also realize that our relationships are just like everyone else's. We have ups and downs just like everyone else. Also, don't make assumptions about the women/men who are in these relationships.

[Vyvy]

Originally Posted by OneOfMany

So you want to write a paper about romantic liaisons between prisoners and free people, and in your paper mention one inmate in particular--Robert Glenn.


How are the two issues linked?


People are used and abused in relationships every day. Whether one is behind bars has little to do with it.

I hope your paper will be more fair than the sensational hype the media provides.

I'll clarify in my edited post. I want and hope to make my paper as unbiased as possible.

[Vyvy]

Originally Posted by babygurl2010

"There’s one particular inmate that I would really like to focus on in the paper, named Robert Glenn who I saw on MSNBC’s Lockup documentary. I believe he is still at Corcoran’s SHU."

I dont think Vyvy is looking to "start a relationship" with an inmate for the paper?... Are you Vyvy?...

Sorry for the misunderstanding, but no.

[OffenderNoMore]

1. What is it like being in a relationship with someone that you cannot have physical contact with? For my husband and I, it really was not that bad. The longing was there but it actually allowed us time to focus on who the other was without the complications of sex. For us, our MWI, is a little different than most, as we were both incarcerated when we met.
2. MWI versus met before incarceration, what are your opinions on them because I have heard a lot of stories about women being used/tricked by inmates. I believe MWI is like any other way of building a relationship, there is just no physical contact. Just like dating, you not only follow your heart, you have to use your head. You have to remember that some people (irregardless of sex), are players.
3. Is it a good idea to directly contact Robert Glenn, or even pursue an inmate like him for a topic? I don’t know anything about him other than what appears in the video clips. As to making contact with Robert Glenn, that would be a personal call. If you know anyone involved with the prison system, that might be your best route. For instance, the prison I was located at, had a HOPE program and they would allow certain individuals in to talk with the ladies. In fact, I've read some of the papers that were written from those conversations online.
4. Should I even try to attempt to write a paper on this type of relationship or is this just a bad idea? Why not write a paper on this type of relationship, every other type of relationship has been written on. MWI's are hard to explain, perhaps your paper might open up some paths to get others to see it in a different light.
5. Any advice? My advice would be this: If you are going to talk to an inmate, if possible, talk to several or get them to write their thoughts. Also, talk to their partners. If possible, I would talk to both male and female inmates, I think you might get a broader prospective of it.

[GoodBI_girl]

Originally Posted by huskymum4ever

I think it's an interesting topic.
However, If you want to start a romantic relationship with an inmate for your paper, that is really unethical of you to do so.

You should be straight and upfront with any inmate you write to, stating what it is you want from them.

It would be really unfair for you to ask them questions, and if they pour their heart out and put a lot of effort into telling you, for you to then turn around and say
'gotcha, k thnx bye', because you've got what you want, after leading them on to think that you could be a friend.

Pursue for journalistic purposes then when he "falls in love" and wants to marry you will it be "GOTCHA!, I'm a journalist ala Lisa Ling or wait, I need to see if my school will give credit for a second paper time?


Unethical IMO and you can certainly glean all you'll need by read only on this site, I mean without a single interview you could write many papers on a variety of things from these posts. People here have seen, done and believe an array of things, please re-consider and stay and learn to love the culture here.

[Vyvy]

PLEASE READ THIS TO ANSWER QUESTIONS/TO HELP REDUCE CONFUSIONS:
I am sorry that I caused a misunderstanding about my intentions. I am currently going over the PTO Guidlines and Policies for the third time to make sure I don't do anything wrong.

About the prisoner I want to focus on: If anyone knows him or is related to him and objects to this at all, please let me know and I will end this topic immediately. I do not want to start any romantic relationship with him at all and than toss him away after I am done using him. I just want to interview him about his relationships with the outside world. The reasons why I would like to have him in my paper is because: 1. He is an inmate with an indeterminate SHU term, and I heard that they are extremely restricted in comparison with inmates in gen. population. I want to see how he feels/deals with this restriction and how others feel about it, too (I heard there is no-contact visits and no phone calls). He is probably going to be there the rest of his life, so how does he deal with relationships probably knowing he is never getting out.
2. Even though he has a violent past that was featured on TV, I assume that there are people who want to reach out to him, anyways. I want to know how he feels about that and how has his relationships changed due to being on TV. It really interests me why people reach out to him even though he is so violent. (I'm not here to judge or make fun of people at all, or to pick through anyone's brain.)

My intentions: I am just collecting information for possible ideas for my college paper. Nothing has been set in stone yet. I am just asking questions right now. I will be starting my Junior year this fall and am just getting ready and a head start. Especially for this paper, I want a lot of time working on it to make sure I do not make any mistakes. I want to make sure I don't use or do anything illegal and at the same time, I realize that I am working with other people. I want to ensure that I show everyone my finished paper to get their okay before I turn it in.

The reason why I chose this topic is because it really interests me. I don't know a lot about prisons, I don't know anyone personally from prison. But this is something I really feel like I want to do. All I ever here about prisons is the recidivism rate and criticism. What interests me more is how sometimes the relationship a prisoner has on the outside can change him for the better.

I am new to here so I'm sorry if there are any misunderstandings. Feel free to say what you would like, either about me or my topic. I think it is too late to edit the original thread, but I'll check everyday and try to reply to all. Thank you everyone! Everyone here is so kind.

[Vyvy]

Originally Posted by mrsgonzos

The school year is over, even for colleges. I understand that there is summer school, but to write and gather information for a "research" paper during a summer college session (for what class) would take too long because it would have to all be by mail and an assignment would not be finished in time since classes usually only run 6 weeks for summer sessions. Unless, you go to college online, but still it sounds suspect. So my question is: What is the REAL reason you would like to contact him? With that clarification I could provide an honest opinion...

I posted a reply to explain it a little better. But I am not in college right now, I am on my summer break before my Junior year. I got a heads up that I will be expected to write a lot so I want to get an early start. I do know that writing on this topic would/could take a long time which is why I want as much time as possible. But right now, I'm just asking questions to see if I can go anywhere with this topic, that is all.

[Vyvy]

Originally Posted by EM_KAT

Pursue for journalistic purposes then when he "falls in love" and wants to marry you will it be "GOTCHA!, I'm a journalist ala Lisa Ling or wait, I need to see if my school will give credit for a second paper time?


Unethical IMO and you can certainly glean all you'll need by read only on this site, I mean without a single interview you could write many papers on a variety of things from these posts. People here have seen, done and believe an array of things, please re-consider and stay and learn to love the culture here.

Sorry but I did not explain well enough in my original post. I posted a reply here to clarify things.