Notice to new members intending to register - from January 9th 2012

Ytisgirl · #1 01-05-2012, 03:52 AM

I am going through a spell or something. I love my fiancé with all of my heart. Normally I have no problem writing him my rambling letters. I have even drew several pics for him last weekend. I was down most of Sunday, but much better by that night. I had two very busy days, Monday and Tuesday. I worked New Years Eve/Day, 7pm- 7am. I wrote him at work but did not finish it. My problem came on Sunday night. I laid across my bed, alone in the peace and quiet. I had to force thoughts and events on paper. Every night since then has been a struggle. It's not that I don't want to. I get upset with my self when I haven't accomplished anything. I am guessing it has to do with two issues.

1- it's the New Year and I am waiting on a letter from him. (not usually a problem)

2- It's the New Year, our year. His discharge date is December, 30th, but his PRD is September, 1st. Either one, it's 'THIS YEAR'. Realizing this, I have had a lot on my mind about it all. Getting the house and myself prepared, even best as can if not completely. 'what if' What if he gets out and ends up leaving, honestly I don't think he will but the fear is there. I am not having second thoughts but think I have really started looking deeper into the reality quickly headed our way. We are MWI so that plays part too. I believe it's the pre jitters, yes 360 days early. Lol.

As you can see I have no problem talking but have trouble writing him. Maybe it's the focus of him that leads my thoughts to all this. It's nothing that he has done or said. I also think I don't want to write him my thoughts right now, as I don't want to worry him over a phase. I believe it will pass but just want opinions on how to get past it and do what I love, talking to him.

Numskull357 · #2 01-05-2012, 04:29 AM

Sounds like writers block to me! Give it a couple of days hopefully it will pass. I have trouble writing my fiancee letters to sometimes but I think it's because we talk on the phone so much their really isn't much to write about. I'm sorry you are having a though time with this, but don't stress about it. Good luck!

Sheryl P. · #3 01-05-2012, 04:38 AM

I don't see anything wrong with you expressing your concerns to him.
An honest relationship is a stronger relationship and if you are afraid to be afraid then you are just building a wall in what part of you he is allowed to "see".
Of course you have a "block" and it is because you are not allowing him to help you through your doubts.
We all have them,it is up to you to decide if your relationship is strong enough to stand up to the doubts and fears or not.If not,now is the time to find out.
Happy New Year!

Ytisgirl · #4 01-05-2012, 04:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sheryl P.

I don't see anything wrong with you expressing your concerns to him.
An honest relationship is a stronger relationship and if you are afraid to be afraid then you are just building a wall in what part of you he is allowed to "see".
Of course you have a "block" and it is because you are not allowing him to help you through your doubts.
We all have them,it is up to you to decide if your relationship is strong enough to stand up to the doubts and fears or not.If not,now is the time to find out.
Happy New Year!

I dont think I have ever seen it as him helping me through my doubts. I know we are capable of getting through it all, before and after. I just dont want to add on any stress to him. It's not helping me though. Thank you for pointing that out.

BFAV4EVER · #5 01-05-2012, 02:40 PM

I myself have really fallen off the letter writing to my fiance. I've sent cards and we talk on the phone a lot and I see him every weekend day I can ... but lately I have found it hurts too much to write him. He was supposed to have been home in December but due to new charges that crept up while he was in ... I don't know when he'll be home. He writes me often and I know getting mail in there is a wonderful feeling. I just don't know what to say, or how to get past the tears when I start that letter.

Hang in there ... you can see the light at the end of your journey, tell him everything, all your "fears" and excitement too.

nakeisha99 · #6 01-05-2012, 02:51 PM

You know what, in the beginning I wrote every single day. Eventually that grew old, for the both of us actually. If you talk on the phone, that also plays a part. Try not to beat yourself up about it. Writers block happens. When I do write, I usually write down things I want to say as they pop up in my head. I'd have a sheet of paper full of things I wanted to say, than I'd turn that into a letter later on in the day. I only do this because I usually forget what it was I was going to write about by the time I do write him. If that doesn't work I'd write 'I Love you' in big letters and sign my name. For some reason he loves that. Even though I'm saying a little, it's saying alot.

Bigbirdsgirl83 · #7 01-05-2012, 02:59 PM

I'm at the point now where not too much is going on for me on the outside so it's just become to hard to come up with things to write so I've been sending him a bunch of lyrics and poems and drawings with short lil I love u I miss u I need u letters