Notice to new members intending to register - from January 9th 2012

Beelasoul · #1 05-18-2012, 12:41 PM

Spoke with my partner's classification officer today regarding his CM status just to get an update on where he stands as far as that goes. He had a review in April but because of his behavior he's still on CM 1 and his next review isn't until October.

I am so disappointed. Hearing about his CM status not being raised makes me feel like he's putting forth no effort to get to where he needs to be so we can move on to the next step. Throughout this whole process he's been writing to whoever will listen and not following the proper channels (just being patient, sitting back, doing the first six months quietly and not pissing anyone off), has pissed someone off, and is now stuck for another six months. I think in his mind because he's a know it all, he feels like what he's been doing IS helping. But it's not and I'm at a loss.

I was hoping his status would change so he would have more options as far as visitation and phone calls. That's not happening. It's almost as if he's working against me instead of with me to improve this situation. I've told him several times - just chill, don't write or say anything to anyone, the time will pass and you'll be back in general population in no time. Now he's looking at least a year before he's back in general population.

SMH

**shaunna** · #2 05-18-2012, 03:33 PM

Sorry to hear that

Have you tried talking to him about it? It's sad when you see people almost self destruct themselves in a way. Maybe he's just not thinking rationally? Hope you get through to him ...

Beelasoul · #3 05-18-2012, 03:56 PM

I have tried talking to him but he still insists on handling things his way.

**fbopnomore** · #4 05-18-2012, 04:29 PM

Keep trying to talk some sense into him, but the decision is ultimately his, so do your best, but don't blame yourself if he won't listen. Some people learn more slowly than others, but I guarantee that the prison will keep reminding him of that. Good luck.

**LifeTraveler** · #5 05-19-2012, 08:51 AM

My husband has been a lot like that. The most I have been able to do is talk, talk, talk and then talk some more. Sometimes I just have to sit back and let him do what he will do. Then he has to learn the hard way. He's learning, but it has always been the damned hard way.

ebfisherculp60 · #6 05-30-2012, 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beelasoul

Spoke with my partner's classification officer today regarding his CM status just to get an update on where he stands as far as that goes. He had a review in April but because of his behavior he's still on CM 1 and his next review isn't until October.

I am so disappointed. Hearing about his CM status not being raised makes me feel like he's putting forth no effort to get to where he needs to be so we can move on to the next step. Throughout this whole process he's been writing to whoever will listen and not following the proper channels (just being patient, sitting back, doing the first six months quietly and not pissing anyone off), has pissed someone off, and is now stuck for another six months. I think in his mind because he's a know it all, he feels like what he's been doing IS helping. But it's not and I'm at a loss.

I was hoping his status would change so he would have more options as far as visitation and phone calls. That's not happening. It's almost as if he's working against me instead of with me to improve this situation. I've told him several times - just chill, don't write or say anything to anyone, the time will pass and you'll be back in general population in no time. Now he's looking at least a year before he's back in general population.

SMH

Where do I begin.....??? I can't tell you how many times I have had to go through this. It's almost like they forget that there are NOT in this alone; that they do have someone in their lives that is going through this with them! Hell!! We are serving time with them!! Bad behavior is a slap in the face and the only consequence(s) seems to be limiting the ONLY lines of communication available and that ultimately leads to a road block on progression within the relationship. He has to be reminded that he has to be a little more considerate of your feelings and the relationship that has been built between the two of you; that you would never tell him anything to lead him wrong and you only want the best for him and your relationship.